Perfect Love
Category: Romance and Relationships

Because of the LORD's great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail.They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. I say to myself, "The LORD is my portion; therefore I will wait for him." The LORD is good to those whose hope is in him, to the one who seeks him
Lamentations 3: 22-25

I struggle a lot with guilt and often times begin to question His calling on my life. What if I can't do it? What if I'm not strong enough. But the answer to my question is simple... I can't... and I'm not... But the God who can not fail is.

Furthermore who am I to question His reasoning. Guilt is an offshoot of pride... strange huh... It is the assumption that we deserve all that we have, but have failed by our own strenghth. Rather life is a gift that is not hinged on our power, but by His grace. So there is no shame, no guilt, no fear. Just perfect love.

Currently listening : Flyleaf By Flyleaf Release date: 2006-08-21

10:33 AM - 4 Comments - 4 Kudos - Add Comment

Creatively Created to Create
Current mood: animated
Category: Blogging

The idea of mankind and the reasons as to why we were created have been running though my head lately. I had a good discussion with my friend Katie today. We were discussing Jesus and how He is depicted in media today. Whether it be in theater, movies, or drawings. If we filled our minds with these images and nothing other… would we recognize Him if He stood in front of us?

I think the need to worship is deeply imbedded in human nature, and creating images is just one outlet. Think about it… humans as early as cavemen adorned their homes with images of the things they valued most. Granted, that some of the images out there were meant to mock God and not worship. If that is the case, I find it deeply offensive and worthy of words I cannot say here. But those who do this as homage to God should be encouraged to continue.

So… when we look at these images I think we should do so with the understanding that no matter how beautifully they depict God… how compassionate… how kind… the real portrait of who He is, is so much more beautiful… so much more compassionate… so much more kind… just so much more.

Furthermore, I pose that if God is the Creator of all things, and we are made in His image, how can we not create? How can we not paint…take pictures… sing… play music… speak… write… act… In doing so we are constantly reworking, redefining, and recreating the world around us into one that is more in tune with the will of God. To not do so would be to accept the status quo, and stagnant waters only fester and pollute.

I must create a system, or be enslav'd by another man's. I will not reason and compare: my business is to create

William Blake
as written in Jerusalem

Currently listening : Lifesong By Casting Crowns Release date: 2005-08-30

11:01 PM - 0 Comments - 1 Kudos - Add Comment

Many Thanks
Current mood: loved

There are many reasons why I love people…
One reason is that they will always surprise you. I've had the privilege of knowing some of my friends for over five years now, and they still manage to surprise me. Then again… what else is to be expected from those who were Creatively Created by the Creator of all Creation?

Another reason is the potential they hold. I strongly believe that no one is beyond God's redemption. To say that someone cannot be saved is to say that God is not enough. God can remold even the dirtiest, broken vessel into a work of art. That is beauty.

I am very thankful to the people who made this a really good birthday. My family who took me out to dinner last night, my sister Cristina who baked me a cake, Katie and Sheryl who went with me tonight to watch "Kung Foo Panda" (an awesome movie by-the-way) and all the people who either called me, sent me a card, or wrote on my facebook and myspace walls. Some of them being people I haven't talked to in a while, but still cared.

Thank you for making me feel loved.

10:34 PM - 2 Comments - 4 Kudos - Add Comment

Into-me-see
Current mood: creative
Category: Dreams and the Supernatural

True intimacy is not achieved by a sexual act. It is not the holding of hands or the looking longinly into the eyes of another. Dr. Grimes, a Christian Studies professor of mine, once described it best by breaking it down into Into-Me-See. It is the ability to look into a person, not just at them. To stand naked before another while being fully clothed.

True Intimacy is so rare these days. Our fears cause us to push up barriers. If another saw us as we truly are, would they still see us as beautiful? Would they still be our friend?



The mystery of you surrounds me. Reaching out to your ever present hands I am comforted. Naked I stand before You, but You do not walk away. From barren hands life springs for, because you are the giver of Life.

8:54 PM - 0 Comments - 2 Kudos - Add Comment

The Results
Current mood: excited
Category: Life

Ok…so I just got home from work and my other babysitting job… I finally got the results from my biopsy today. I've spent all day thinking and pondering the right words to say, and I can't seem to figure them out. So I'll just say it…

I don't have Cancer!!! Praise God!! Yay!!!

I just can't stop thanking you for all your prayers and continual calling to check on me or find out if the results had come back.

The two growths have gotten bigger, but since it's not cancerous and located on a necessary organ the doctors don't want to remove it just yet. If it gets to the point where it's obstructing my breathing or something, then it'll have to go. But for now, it'll be a temporary-permanent resident.

Again thank you. For all your prayer and encouragement, thank you

yours
eva

9:48 PM - 3 Comments - 6 Kudos - Add Comment

Here I go again…

One of my favorite verses:

I waited patiently for the LORD;
He turned to me and heard my cry.
He lifted me out of the slimy pit, ?
out of the mud and mire; ?
He set my feet on a rock ?
and gave me a firm place to stand.
He put a new song in my mouth, ?
a hymn of praise to our God. ?
Many will see and fear ?
and put their trust in the LORD.

Psalm 40: 1-3

Common among all great literature is the idea of the hero or heroine. They are a person of great integrity who in short saves the day. The Lord is the hero of my story and I am more than happy, and more than willing to give Him that position.

Time and time again He has rescued me, restored me to life, and breathed a new song into my mouth. As I’ve stated before… He is the Unshakable, Unbreakable, Unmovable One.

When I gave my life to Him, He never said life would be easy. He only said He would always be there.

As many of you know, I had been without health insurance for more than a year. When I could finally go, I set up a physical with my doctor and she asked me about the swelling on my neck. When I told her how I was tested for thyroid cancer a couple years ago, she ordered full blood work and an ultrasound of my thyroid. I’m going in for a biopsy this Thursday.

A couple of you might be worried right now. Nothing hurts and the procedure is a very easy one. If it comes out negative then it is my second negative and I am considered cancer free. It still has the potential to become something more in the future, so I’m going to talk to my doctor about taking out my thyroid. If it is cancer and it has not spread, then it is still very easy to get rid of. All it requires is a minor surgery, a little hormone or radiation therapy, a cool scar, and its done.

It’s going to be ok… if you have any questions feel free to ask me or look at the link provided.

The Lord is the Hero of my story, and my desire is that others would see this and come to know Him.

http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/thyroid-cancer/DS00492/DSECTION=8

10:47 AM - 4 Comments - 8 Kudos - Add Comment

Before I leave this world...
Current mood: contemplative

There are a couple of things that I want to do:

10. Take a month long road trip traveling through the Northern United States and Canada

I love going on roadtrips. Not really knowing where you’re going kind of excites me. I want to take a summer off if possible and just roam the northern United States and Canada. I want to live in the back seat of my car, shower in the river, poop in the woods... yeah... that’s the life for me.

9. Smuggle Bibles into a Communist Country

Well... kind of already did this...there is an awesome story behind this so feel free to ask me.

8. See Italy

Among all forms of art architecture is one of my top five. I would love to visit this country and just walk the cities and soak it all in.

7. Become an old lady

This might seem kind of stupid, but if you really think about it not everyone makes it. I want to be an interesting old lady though. The kind of old woman the nieghborhood gangsters fear and respect, but children love. When my body is no longer able to work, I want to be the Lord’s bard. A person who tells His story.

6. Walk the Great Wall of China

Of all the continents in the world I love Asia the most. With her warm-hearted people and her mountains looking like jagged emeralds my heart was found and left there. I would love to walk the great wall which is the symbol of Asian greatness.

5. Private, very private : )

Trust me... you don’t want to know.

4. Be arrested for a good cause

You have not fully lived until you have heard, "We have the Place surrounded, come out with your hands up!"

3. Become my Husbands Muse

I want to be an inspiration to many people, but my husband will be the most important.

2. Give Birth

I really want to be a mother. It’s in my nature.

1. Hear the voice of my Savior call me home

I want His voice to be the last thing I hear.

8:05 PM - 1 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

Seek Ye First
Category: Religion and Philosophy

Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them…And why do you worry about clothes? See how the lilies of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these…But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.

Matt 6: 25-33

I write these letters for many reasons… One is to show you the God who is worthy of all Praise, another is to make you think, or just to make you laugh, even if it means making myself look like an idiot. If you laugh, it’s worth it.

This letter is partially in response to my previous letter and partially to the things that are going on around me.

I spent a good part of my Sunday evening talking to a friend of mine who was going through some issues with motherhood. She was afraid she would not be the woman her son needed as a mother. I spent some more time talking to a loved one about marital issues and the uncertainty that is going to come. I’ve spent time talking to brothers and sisters in the faith about dating and relationships. And I’ve spent a lot of time worrying about a job opportunity and personal health issues. As always I turn to my man and the one who watches over me.

This verse came to mind when my Life Span Development professor was teaching on the decisions Young Adults face. People between the ages of 18-35 are faced with having to choose a mate and a career. I do not fear being married to a man, I fear marrying the wrong man. I asked him how I would know who was the right man for me. He quoted Erwin McManus, "When you are passionate about God, you can trust your passions."

At this point in our lives we should not be worried about finding the right man or gaining the perfect career. Our main focus should be on becoming that Man and that Woman God wants us to become. The more we let God infiltrate us, the more we become like Him and are able to make the right choices. We gain His wisdom, His perception, and a heart like His. When that happens, everything will fall into place. We will become that mother, father, wife, husband, girlfriend, boyfriend, sister, brother, friend, co-worker and boss that we are meant to be. Things may not always be perfect, but they will be as they should be.

Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moth and rust do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.

Matthew 6: 19-21

Currently listening : The Joshua Tree By U2 Release date: 15 June, 1990

1:39 PM - 0 Comments - 2 Kudos - Add Comment

My Man
Category: Romance and Relationships

The Journey Ends…

So… a while back ago, when I was still going to CBU, I was waiting for a friend so we could walk to Chapel together. I didn’t know what time it was but I knew it was starting to get late. I started to rummage through my bag to find my cell phone and when I saw the time I shrieked and started power walking to chapel. There I found other friends and sat down next to them. In doing so I realized that I had lost my favorite bracelet. It was simple, no gold or silver, diamonds or rubies, just a couple beads and string. It was my evangelism bracelet. I would use it every day at the children’s center I worked at. Through its colors I would share the story of the most Amazing and Beautiful person I had ever met. It is fulfilling to see how the children so readily understood and wanted to know more. They weren’t jaded or skeptical, they just knew there was something out there that was greater and stronger than anything they had ever been exposed to and they were fascinated to find out how deeply this One loved them. Seeing that I had lost it left me heartbroken.

But I had a Brilliant Idea! I decided to pray that God would return it to me. Not only that, I asked that God would have my man deliver my bracelet back to me. This is how I would know he was the right guy for me. I knew that God had heard my prayer and said yes, He would return my bracelet to me by the hand of the one who would be my man.

After beautiful moments of worship through music, it was time to bring out my Bible. I opened my bag and once again started to rummage through it. God has an amazing sense of humor. There, laying on top of the rim of my Bible was my bracelet.

So you see… God has already given me a man. He’s a little short and chubby, but his pages are marked, worn, and familiar. I have a hard time when I am away from him for a long time. Though I’ve used other peoples "men", and for the most part they are exactly the same, for some reason they don’t give me the same satisfaction that mine gives me. We have a special bond, this Bible and I.

So this is what I’ve decided to focus on. Enjoying life with my man, and, as Joelle said, the God of the universe who can’t take his eyes off of me.

6:14 PM - 5 Comments - 4 Kudos - Add Comment

And though it was the darkest night, the Son still rose
Current mood: jedi
Category: Dreams and the Supernatural

Hope. Hope is that which keeps mankind moving

Hope is the motivation and the cure

The promise that that which has happened will not always be

It is the promise... tomorrow will soon come

With new life and restroration riding on its tail

Hope is the answer, Hope is the way

Hope is nothing this world can give

It is a gift from the one seated on the throne

The Son who rose

Through His eyes we can see

The beauty in this ugly world

4:26 PM - 3 Comments - 3 Kudos - Add Comment