Literary Journal post

Hey all,

I posted to the blog for Hayden's Ferry Review. Please check it out (and maybe leave a comment?)--

http://haydensferryreview.blogspot.com/2008/07/one-writers-trip-to-santa-barbara.html

12:30 AM - 0 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

The Harry Potter Musical

I won second place, thanks to Harry Potter 

Last week at the Santa Barbara Writer's Conference, I took second place in the ultimate writeoff competition, a speedwriting competition in which we were given a writing assignment and 20-30 minutes to complete. My (in)famous entry was on Day Four of the competition, when we were given thirty minutes to write a song number for a musical based on a book. My book was Harry Potter.

If you'd like to see me performing my musical number (it's pretty ridiculous and humiliating, but hey, all in good fun), you can watch the video on my profile or go to my wordpress blog and follow the links--

http://allrileyedup. wordpress. com/ 

5:57 PM - 0 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

Domo Arigato, Mr. Give-Pot-O

Suggested edits to this FOXnews article, sent to me by good friend T:

An unsuspecting (lucky or unlucky? only time will tell) passenger who flew through Tokyo's Narita airport left with $10,000 worth of free marijuana thanks to a forgetful (soon-to-be fired) customs officer (undercover drug trafficker with a solid plan) and a sniffer dog (mangy mutt) with an unreliable nose (ya think?).

The officer stuffed five ounces (is it my imagination or have prices gone up?) of the drug into the side pocket of a randomly selected black suitcase (the bulletproof briefcases were already filled with cocaine) coming off an overseas flight into Narita yesterday so that the dog could get some practice at detecting drugs. (or, as it turns, get some practice at NOT detecting drugs)

"The dog couldn't find it (he's since been euthanized) and the officer also forgot which bag he put it in (clearly a case of 'he sampled the product to determine its potency')," a customs office spokeswoman (irritated personnel) said. "If by some chance passengers find it in their suitcase, we're asking them to return it." (she tried not to laugh as she said this)

The spokeswoman quoted the unnamed (fired) 38-year-old officer as saying: "I knew that using passengers' bags is prohibited, but I did it because I wanted to improve the sniffer dog's ability." (plus, I was high. We later attempted to sneak onto a flight to Amsterdam. I dressed him up with a hat and trench coat. It was  funny. Heh. Trench coat. Have you ever seen a dog in a trench coat! Ha!)

He was reprimanded by the head of customs at Narita, Manpei Tanaka, who said: "This case was extremely regrettable. (we were planning on using that marijuana for an upcoming party) I would like to deeply apologize." (to my drug lord, who now has a couple bounty hunters on my ass for 10 grand. Do you have any idea how much that is in yen!!!!!!)

The marijuana, which has a street value of $9,680, was in a metal box wrapped with newspapers. (The owner of the black suitcase is likely to suspect a bomb. He will later note, it wasn't A bomb, but DA bomb.) Japan strictly prohibits both hard and soft drugs, (the semi-soft are still acceptable due to certain agreements made with France) with people imprisoned (or given a job with customs) for possession of even small amounts (less than 10,000 yen worth) of marijuana.

Uh, what's Japanese for "Whoops, my bad"

8:12 AM - 0 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

Bon Jovi? Young Guns II?

http://allrileyedup.wordpress.com/2008/05/22/im-going-down-in-a-blaze-of-glory/

11:41 AM - 2 Comments - 4 Kudos - Add Comment

Toothbrushes and Other Childish Nonsense

http://allrileyedup.wordpress.com/2008/05/19/look-at-them-pearly-whites/

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Mother’s Day Mayhem

http://allrileyedup.wordpress.com/2008/05/12/post-mothers-day-wrap-up/

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You Tell Me

You Are a Dash

..http://www.blogthingsimages.com/whatpunctuationmarkareyouquiz/dash.gif" height="100" width="100"> Your life is fast paced and varied. You are realistic, down to earth, and very honest. You’re often busy doing something interesting, and what you do changes quickly. You have many facets to your personality, and you connect them together well. You have a ton of interests. While some of them are a bit offbeat, they all tie together well. You friends rely on you to bring novelty and excitement to their lives. (And while you’re the most interesting person they know, they can’t help feeling like they don’t know you well.) You excel in: Anything to do with money You get along best with: the Exclamation Point

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I Never

http://allrileyedup.wordpress.com/2008/03/05/i-never/

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A Busy Day of Doing Nothing in Particular

http://allrileyedup.wordpress.com/2008/03/01/what-did-you-do-today-honey/

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Bathing My Dog

http://allrileyedup.wordpress.com/2008/02/17/working-at-the-dog-wash-yeah/

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