My new book

I have decided to release a new diet book. It's called "losing weight the way it should be"

Basically you have to exercise for the same amount of time to burn the calories in your food as it took you to eat the food in the first place.

So, if you eat a Whopper Double beef with cheese and extra bacon, large meal, and a sundae....in ....say......a stoned 3 and a half minutes....then 3 and a half minutes of walking to the shop to buy yourself an antacid will burn those fat bugs away.

There is also the advanced section, where we talk about "quantum calories". For anyone familiar with Quantum mechanics, quantum calories basically are created and borrowed and then destroyed, without actually contributing a great deal. So they could, in theory, be a million calories, or none. Because you are borrowing the calories from someone else, as long as you destroy them, by eating them, you are ok.
Let me explain this point in more detail:

Someone buys the above mentioned meal, and a large packet of m & m's. You eat some of their fries. They also decide against eating the m & m's and you eat those. Now, here's the important part. BECAUSE THEY PAID FOR THE FOOD, IT'S THEIR CALORIES, NOT YOURS!. So eat away knowing that this food is essentially negative calories for you. You are using more energy to eat the food than you are getting from it because someone else paid for it.

Quantum calories.....a very advanced field of theoretical dietrary science.

This can also be used in conjunction with the Einstein created Relativity Theory of Fat and Diets. Or expressed as E=MC squared.. meaning EMOTIONAL = ME x Chocolate ( more of a female theory that one). Relativity theory of Fat and Diets basically translates as, if you stand near fat people, you don't look as fat. It's all relative.

I shall be publishing it to no doubt worldwide acclaim soon. See me soon on Oprah's book of the month club...

1:31 AM - 0 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

stupid damn loggin page!!

ok. If I have to log in twice one more fucking time....I swear to god....

is it just me or does anyone else get that annoying second log-in screen when they try and log in to MySpace? I get the "woah! you must be logged in to do that!"

So......I must be logged in to log in?

fucking piece of .......

Sometimes I curse the electronic teat of entertainment that has kept me so nurtured and battery henned...

6:36 AM - 0 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

stupid damn loggin page!!

ok. If I have to log in twice one more fucking time....I swear to god....

is it just me or does anyone else get that annoying second log-in screen when they try and log in to MySpace? I get the "woah! you must be logged in to do that!"

So......I must be logged in to log in?

fucking piece of .......

Sometimes I curse the electronic teat of entertainment that has kept me so nurtured and battery henned...

6:36 AM - 4 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

t shirt to die for

ok. This has to be the best site ever, and I am loathe to actually tell you what it is.......actually I won't........but let it be known that I have found te best shirts on the web, guaranteed to offend, coz mischief and either get me kicked out, or beaten up

1:29 AM - 2 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

success is the best revenge

ok. I am over my little out burst from the other day.

I realised a long time ago that anyone can be positive and happy and get things done when things are going their way. But the true measure of a person's character is how they overcome adversity and hardship.

How you pick yourself up off the floor is far more important than how you got there. I will not be subdued, nor will I allow my behaviour to be influenced by transient moments in time.

Rage rage against the dying of the light...

Do not allow people to sway you from your convictions if you believe them to be true, and don't allow people to steal your dreams or your time, because I guarantee, they won't do it for you.

Be yourself, you are the person best qualified.

8:33 AM - 0 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

they can all fuck off

Ok. What the goddamn fuck? Are people losing their minds at the moment? Have I become some parody of the man I once was? How do friends just explode around you?

At this particular moment, I have fallen out with several friends, all due to some strange and unnamed fury. Friends accusing me of stealing then finding the item exactly where I told them it was. A friend accusing me of being a liar, yet i haven't told a lie.

I would be honest here, and tell you if I was at fault. They don't use this site, and noone would ever tell them. And if this is a true log in a diary style, then I should be honest and speak up.

This is me being completely and utterly honest. I haven't been any of the things i have been accused of. People have lost their minds. My nhouse mate and friend of 16 years is moving out on monday after leaving me a dear john letter. Her father has just died and she is very emotional, but she lost her mind the other day about aspirin, and where it might have been moved to. (she is a bit obessive compulsive and everything must be exactly where it was before, or rather where she wants it to be this time.)

So what does she do? She goes to the friends i value most. Thge friends I have told her about and introduced her to. And she goes and slags me off. Complains and cries like i am the worst man on the face of the earth.

I am so fucking sick of this shit. So sick of this. She lived with me before and dd the same thing because she had a drug problem (as did I). We are both clean and sober and functioning now. or at least one of us is.

Last time I had just started seeing my girlfriend and mother of my son. She had issues with it and moved out.

This time I have just started seeing a ownderful new girl. And Guess what? in about the same time period, she has decided that she has issues and needs to move out.

I am fucking over it. over every single fucking one of them. Over them so much I don't even want to see them at my best friends 30th this year. So I am not going to go. I am not going to subject myself to it. I can't.

I am fighting a court case, my mother has breast cancer, I only see my son for a couple of days a week. and now, my friends seem to want to run against me for reasons I can;t understand.

None of them will talk to me face to face because they are so scared of me saying something to them that they freak out.

I need peace. peace. long lasting and silent peace.

7:50 AM - 3 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

study

I have decided that I need to go back to study and become a poor student once more. I will be mocked. I will face derision. But I lo that I walk through the valley of bad student breath, I shall fear no assignment.

I need to kep my brain active and can't do it without forcing myself into study. I have been dating this beautiful young woman who is going to uni and studying latin, and ancient history because she loves the pursuit of knowledge. And it reminded me. So do I. The whole reason I went to uni before was because i studying something that i enjoyed and was good at. Why stop now?

I think we should all study. Study each other and things that make no sense for it is the pursuit of knowledge and knowing the unknowable, or the not needing to be known that creates a rich meaning in people;'s life. What is a hobby but that which means nothing to anyone but ourselves. Can't knowledge be a hobby? Perhaps I might discover what I want to be when I grow up.

I want to study something really cool, that involves bridging courses in science or something...but then again...I love the arts..

anyone got any suggestions?

6:19 AM - 0 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

smitten
Current mood: hopeful

I am. Smitten that is. Met this lovely young lady late last year and took some time to get to know her. She makes me laugh. Has a beautiful smile and kinda digs me from what she says.

Isn't life weird and interesting? Amazing the changes that can happen with only a few decisions.

it's still well early days, and hey.... I'm still getting to know her and she is getting to know me, but i like the way it's progressing. She is intelligent (always a major requirement), beautiful (also handy), digs me (somehow the thing I seemed to forget with my last two girlfriends), and a few other things which I won't talk about on here (nothing dirty, but personal things).

How did this happen? Good damn question. Infinite degrees of chance? Some weird game played by alien overlords? All highly possible. Oh wait, except the infinite one. That can't really be possible. Or is it possible because the chances are infinite? Hmm, ....

Anyway. Some things can renew your faith and recharge your batteries in the softest and strangest ways. Now, I have to use this power for good....

7:17 AM - 6 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

Ghosts as magnetic fields?

A self-confessed sceptic about the paranormal, he says the idea is to teach people to apply genuine scientific skills so they can decide for themselves what lies behind phenomena that appear to have no rational explanation.
"I'm not saying I can explain these experiences but I am saying that you will have the mental tools to look seriously and sensibly at them," he said.

Mr Braithwaite, 34, whose day job entails working with brain-damaged patients, has spent nearly 15 years researching why there have been so many ghost sightings at Muncaster, particularly in the castle's Tapestry Room.
Sounds of children crying and screaming, feelings of an other-worldly presence, the sound of footsteps and fleeting visions have all been reported in the room where guests reputedly never spend a second night.
Other stories concern the "Muncaster Boggle" or White Lady, who is said to haunt the gardens and surrounding roadways.
She is said to be the ghost of Mary Bragg, a young girl murdered in the early 19th Century near the castle gates.
Another spook is Tom Fool, the castle's former jester.
Mr Braithwaite, however, suggests that an unusually high magnetic field in the area could account for the ghostly goings-on.
"There's no single explanation for ghosts, apparitions and strange experiences," he said.
"There are a variety depending on the context and the individual.
"I don't advance any fanciful notions of the supernatural.
"Some strange perceptions under certain circumstances can be induced by very strange and anomalous magnetic fields in the rooms where things go bump in the night."


Ok, so according to this genius.....magnetic fields can make it sound like there are small children laughing and crying in your bedroom................

Perhaps I might take those speakers, with their magnets, the fuck away from my room.

9:36 PM - 0 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

January 23rd officlally the most depressing

Brits find January 23 their gloomiest day
Monday, January 23 is going to be the unhappiest day of the year, a British university researcher says.
Cliff Arnall, a health psychologist at the University of Cardiff, specialising in confidence-building and stress management, told AFP the prediction was the result of some gruelling mathematics.

So apparently, we can now predict depression based upon mathematical formula. I don't doubt this statistic, as I read this article, my phone rang and a friend of mine told me how they had been spending the day in tears. I was required for emergency beer provision.



Another, seemingly well grounded friend told me on this very day that they had been so dpressed they could barely get out of bed, even though they had been feeling fine for over 2 years.
Another friend's brother committed suicide on this day this year.

So, if we are all so good at using mathematics to solve when we are depressed, how iz it we can't seem to fathom that the reason that people are depressed is more likely due to a disassociated view of the world and their place within it? When information comes at you so quickly, when power is removed from you to affect the things around you, the water we drink, the air we breathe, poverty, world hunger, corruption, police brutality....when we all live in a world where there are more and more people existing in subcultures, underground movements, body mod fans, strange clubs and groups, is it any wonder that people feel depressed?

One of the major factors for stress is a 'lack of control over your own destiny" or a 'feeling of an inability to affect the things and people around you'. Having people who go to clubs and listen to dance music, the war on drugs, the war against abortion..all these things are things that people, should they choose to, should have every right to experience.

Experience breeds knowledge. Knowledge helps you to better understand your place in the world. Understanding your place, which, by rights, is anywhere you want it to be, helps people to cope when things aren't quite going your way, and may assist people to feel a little less depressed.

Happiness through empowerment of the self is really the only goal that humanity should be spending money on. Not warfare, nor political campaigns designed to keep the power brokers in power making decisions you have not elected them to make, based on ideals you don't hold, for a truth and future you don't want.

9:35 PM - 1 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment