Paradise Displaced
Current mood: exhausted

Hey y'all. I really, really want to reply to everyone's e-mails individually, and I'm very touched that so many people have gotten in touch to see how I'm doing and offer help. I will always appreciate and remember it. However, I'm completely exhausted right now, so I'm cutting and pasting from LJ for the moment.

Arrived safely in Nashville around 4:30 am with cats, dog and husband. Drove so much it feels like we should be on Pluto now. Todd is amazing and took the wheel for 13 hours, singing silly songs to me and holding my hand when I burst into tears. Katrina flashbacks all around, especially looking over the Union terminal, where army convoys lay in wait.

The houses in New Orleans east, still flaking off dry rotted shingles, crooked Mary statues in abandoned front lawns. Humvees rolling in on I-10 west, tons of tour buses come to evacuate the elderly. Watched New Orleans through the windows of five thousand cars. So many colors and shapes and expressions. Crawled along aside an ancient, rusty Caprice packed with nine people, babies sitting on siblings sitting on their mother's lap. Their window rolled down, no air conditioning. Skins glistening in the setting sun.

The Subway in Slidell ran out of bread, and all the gas pumps were bled dry, covered in plastic. All along the road, only one person was mildly nasty to us, but I understand what stress can do. Shit, do I ever.

At an Alabama gas station, swapped greetings with a boy from Lafayette while his puppy frolicked with Klaus. The radio played "Welcome to the Jungle" and Todd and I cranked it up and howled along, laughing a sick amphetamine laugh. My hands are shaking and my stomach feeks like it's crawling across the floor, but that's okay. Right now, my strength comes from my friends and family until I get back on my feet.

People of the city, stay safe wherever you are.

Currently listening : Brighter Now By Legendary Pink Dots Release date: 1993-04-23

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MonsterLibrarian reviews MUTINY IN HEAVEN

Mutiny in Heaven by Whitney Lakin
Publish America, 2008
ISBN: 1605637912
Availability: New

Neil is a soul whose troubles started from the moment of his birth as a winged infant, half human half angel. Moments after his birth he is dropped off at a charity hospital where his wings are removed, leaving scars that stay with him for the rest of his life. Fast forward to his teenage years and Neil is living in a New Orleans orphanage where he is terribly unhappy and doesn't fit in with the rest of the boys. He runs away, hoping to create a better life for himself, knowing that he is meant for more than what the orphanage has to offer. His experience on the run ends in tragedy, and he is returned to the orphanage, then transferred to a different orphanage where he can attend public school. He remains an outsider to all the students except for Deanna, a girl who becomes his lifelong friend. A decade later, Neil and Deanna have started a band, but are struggling to get by. A mysterious man offers Neil a recording contract if he will add a few songs to the album, songs in an otherworldly language. Neil reluctantly agrees and soon the world seems to be in the palm of his hand. The only problem is that the strange man is an Angel with plans to unseat God and subjugate all of mankind by breeding a race of half-man half-angels. If that isn't enough to dampen Neil's success, there is also an insane, shadowy serial killer who has decided that Neil must die.

Mutiny in Heaven is an entertaining and effective read about Angels, demons, and ghosts. It is also a story of sin and acceptance set in a rich and dynamic New Orleans that leaves the reader feeling as though they have actually visited the wild city. Whitney Lakin brings New Orleans to life in the imagination of her reader as only someone who is intimately familiar with the city could, showing not only its glamour, but also its ugly side. Mutiny in Heaven is a unique story that shows the good and the bad in its characters, accepting both sides as human nature. It would make an excellent addition to any library.
Contains: Sex, sodomy
Review by Bret Jordan

Dedicated to helping librarians in collection development and readers advisory in the horror genre and helping horror readers find another good book to read.

Visit us at:www.monsterlibrarian.com

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Join me at Poet’s gallery for a night of wine, music and literary decadence

Saturday, August 2nd is BOUND LINEN NIGHT at Poet's Gallery, 3113 Magazine Street.
Join us from 6-10 to celebrate the release of my novel, MUTINY IN HEAVEN, along with Kurt Amacker's release of DEAD SOUL's and Christy Kane's TALES OF THE SISTERS KANE. Special musical guests Morella and the Wheels of If.

Decadent dress or costume if you like.

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MUTINY IN HEAVEN now available

Hello everyone! I just wanted to let you know that my second novel, MUTINY IN HEAVEN is out now. It's taken me five years, but I finally feel that I've absorbed enough of the New Orleans lifestyle—hurricanes and all—to be able to write a full-length novel about it. It's chock-full of the tortured, playful decadence you'd expect of me. It's available through amazon.com.

I'd really appreciate if you could help spread the news! Thanks for all your support, everyone—I couldn't have done it without y'all!

Love,
Whitney

MUTINY IN HEAVEN

A baby is abandoned at Charity Hospital in New Orleans, the hospital of last-chance patients and the urban poor. When the doctors unwrap the child's swaddling clothes, they discover vestigial wings. Fourteen years later, Neil is a lonely boy living in a run-down Lower Garden District orphanage. He plots an escape but ends up entangled in a brutal backwoods murder. On the run from a serial killer, Neil falls into an underworld of occult magic and rock and roll only to learn that he's the center of an ancient struggle between God and angel. Neil was never meant to be born, and a secret department of Heaven will do anything to destroy him, even if it means wiping out New Orleans by hurricane. Only one man can save him, but time is running out….

Currently listening : Velocifero By Ladytron Release date: 2008-06-03

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Appearing at BABELCON in Baton Rouge

I’ll be on the "Paranomal" panel at this year’s BabelCon in Baton Rouge, July 19-20. For more info, including hotel reservations, check out the BabelCon site.

Currently listening : The Bat Cave Masters By Alien Sex Fiend Release date: 07 April, 1998

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Interview with the Netherlands-based CYBERANGELS

CyberAngles interview

A very scary Xmas to all!

Currently listening : Silence Is Sexy By Einstürzende Neubauten Release date: 20 June, 2000

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Press release and order info for "Thirteenth Child," appearing in MIDNIGHT LULLABIES

Here's a direct link to order a copy

World writers pen creepy children's tales for anthology

Midnight Lullabies proceeds go to Doctors Without Borders

Thousand Oaks, CA (Saturday, November 10, 2007) -- Writers from across the globe have come together to release a charitable anthology of frightening tales and poems just in time for the cold, dark nights of winter.

Midnight Lullabies, the latest in a series of collected works from literary magazine The Harrow, was released this week, featuring the creative works of writers hailing from the United States, Canada, England, Ireland and Australia.

"What I love about settling inside the room of a horror story is not quite knowing whether you have locked out the bad thing or just locked it in," said award-winning writer and author of 28 books Tim Wynne-Jones in his introduction for the collection. "Midnight Lullabies is a delicious collection of blind groping, creaking floorboards, heavy whispers and unholy giggling. Many of these imaginings are feigned remembrances -- or real ones, for all I know -- of the darkness and aloneness and subsequent horror of childhood."

In fact, in order to enhance the eeriness of these childish yet terrifyingly mature writings, -- which smack of a current-day "Brothers Grimm Fairy Tales," but scarier -- the anthology's editors have included illustrations culled from the vaults of the Osborne Collection of Early Children's Books. These tomes, mostly from the late 19th century, abound with images drawn from the seemingly repressed and conflicted aesthetic of Victorian England, according to Wynne-Jones.

"We wanted to create a collection to remind everybody that being a child may be a frightening occupation," said Kfir Luzzatto, The Harrow Press' anthology editor. "We, the grown-ups, must pay attention to what our children try to tell us when something haunts them. We hope that Midnight Lullabies will help parents to be more receptive to scary things, whether real or imaginary, that may lurk in their children's bedroom."

All told, Midnight Lullabies offers 29 unique pieces of poetry and prose. All proceeds from the book's sales will go toward Doctors Without Borders, an international medical humanitarian organization that delivers emergency aid to people -- many of whom are children -- in more than 70 countries.

For information about "The Harrow," Midnight Lullabies or their contributing writers, visit www.theharrow.com. For information about Doctors Without Borders, visit www.doctorswithoutborders.org. Midnight Lullabies can be purchased at www.BookSurge.com, www.Amazon.com, www.Abebooks.com and www.Alibris.com.

Currently listening : Alternative By Iamx Release date: 30 October, 2007

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Short story appearing in TWISTED DREAMS MAGAZINE

A car crash....a bloody trail...mutilation, and the sun sets....

My short story "Rorschach Highway" is featured in the Halloween issue of TWISTED DREAMS MAGAZINE, available now through Lulu Press. If you have some spare change, pick yourself up a copy>:-)

Currently listening : Fur & Gold By Bat for Lashes Release date: 31 July, 2007

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The Writer’s life--writing/publishing tips for new writers
Current mood: calm

Disclaimer: Just to let you know--I'm very sorry, but I don't have the power to actually get you published. My aim here is to share advice that I've had to find out the hard way on the path from the first word to the published book, story, article and poem. Some stuff you might know already, some might be new. Whatever the case may be, I hope that you find the advice helpful.

Publishing is a challenge, and that's the litote of the century. It's chock-full of ups and downs, but if you work for it then it will happen. Make sure you're heading in the right direction, and keep on walking.

Writing in your spare time is a passion. Publishing is a lifestyle. It's physically, mentally, emotionally and socially demanding. The writing life is at times lonely and frustrating. It happens to us all. Sometimes, you just can't be like "other people." You will live, eat and breathe at your computer. You will somehow morph into your own personal word processor. Bon courage! Enjoy the process—it will shape you for the best. Determination and discipline will define you as a writer and as a human being. It's one of the most rewarding experiences of a lifetime.

That said, make sure you're able to commit to it. Number one—and this may sound strange coming from someone who writes liquor-drenched horror, but take care of your body. A well-cared for writer will, in the long run, produce better work and deal better with the inevitable setbacks of the writer's life. Healthy methods of coping with stress and rejection are crucial. A beer once in awhile is a blessed thing, and delving into decadence can be gorgeous and thought-provoking, but there's a limit. Take care of yourself, and your ideas will come. It does not mean your ideas will dry up. It means that you'll be better able to serve them if you're in good health.

Now, onto equipment. As with any profession, you need the right equipment. Start with a good text program that has the capability of creating .doc or .rtf files (these are the most commonly requested formats by publishers). I would strongly advise buying an external drive and backing up your work there. It is so worth the extra $100-$200. Lock the external in a fireproof safe EVERY TIME you step away from your computer. I have 4 copies of everything I write: one on my hardrive that I save every 5 minutes, one on my external drive that I lock in a firesafe, another on a remote webserver that I upload in .rtf format every night, and a hard copy of every finished draft. Sound extreme? Maybe, but compared to losing your precious intellectual property it's a very small sacrifice. Trust me. My laziness in saving cost me over 30 pages of my first novel, weeks before it had to go to the publisher. Wah. ?

Before querying a publisher (we'll get to that in a minute), make sure that you have a finished manuscript ready to go. Completely finished, from intro quote to THE END. Edit then edit some more. Put it down for a few days or weeks and come back with a fresh eye. Accept that there is always room for improvement. Even on published stuff. That's the caveat of being a writer—there's always something left to pick at in terms of a manuscript. In terms of productive editing, enlist the help of a trusted friend, preferably someone well-read and articulate who can give you honest feedback without either being too vague or too critical. Choose this person wisely—they will be your new confidant and in a sense, personal trainer and all around literary ass-kicker. Speaking of which, I'd like to take this opportunity to thank anyone who has ever suffered through a first draft reading of my work. They know who they are, and they have my undying devotion for life.

When it's ready to go, make sure that the manuscript is formatted exactly as the publisher asks. (You can usually find guidelines in "The Novel and Short Story Writer's Market" or through the publisher's website). Some publishers will publish the manuscript as is. Some will work with you to make changes. Don't be afraid to ask. Do as much footwork as you can before contacting your editor or publisher with a question, but if you can't find the answer on your own regarding any aspect of the publication process, you have every right to ask.

When it comes to submitting anything, don't try to be cute—no colored paper or funny doodads. Professionalism is key. Neatly typed, usually in Times New Roman or Courier, 12pt, 1-inch margins are typical industry standards. Page numbering and headers vary from publisher to publisher—make sure you do your research before submitting. Same goes for the query letter. By the way, a query letter is what you send to a publisher when you're asking them if they want to publish your book. You usually don't just send them the manuscript straight out. The query letter goes something like this:

Your name
Your address
Your phone

To: Name of editor
Name of Publication
Address of publication

Dear (editor's name):

[Insert intro here and brief summary of manuscript, see below]

My name is Whitney Lakin. I found your publishing house through "The Writer's Market." I see in your listing that you publish new horror that focuses on the demonic. If you're currently acquiring, then I have what I feel is a perfect fit for you. My most recent manuscript, "A Computer in the Devil's Kitchen" is set in modern-day New Orleans. The Devil acquires a brand new computer, and begins targeting victims through the popular networking site MySpace. Drawing on the contemporary theme of computer stalkers, the Devil creates a profile and lures unsuspecting teens and twenty-somethings who think that they're just in for a good party. Once in Hell, the Devil steals their souls. (Think Strangeland meets Faust).
One day, a girl is investigating her brother's abduction when she comes across the Devil's Myspace page. Can she figure out how to save him before it is too late and her brother is damned forever? Or will she be caught in his hellish web and tortured for all eternity?

[Insert readership here and any plans for marketing or a personal platform—i.e. any affiliation you have that can help boost sales, see below]

"A Computer in the Devil's Kitchen" resonates with readers young and old alike, but has a special appeal to those in the 18-25 year bracket. As a frequent public speaker, I will be actively promoting my book through appearances and internet-based advertising.
[P.S. Don't say "my friend read it and thinks it's great." You need to cover more ground with your query]

[Insert bio here, see below]

I am the author of the full-length novel "A Paintbrush in the Devil's Toolbox." I've published dozens of non-fiction articles as well as gothic poetry and horror shorts in such well-known magazines as "Skullcrusher Press" and "BloodRain Digest." I am also prepared to follow up "A Computer in the Devil's Kitchen" with a sequel.

[Summarize what you're sending and THANK THEM—can't stress this enough!!]

I've sent the first three chapters of my work as requested. Should you be interested, I'd be happy to send you a synopsis** or the entire manuscript. I appreciate your taking the time to read my work.

Sincerely,
Whitney Lakin
666 Canto Lane
Dis, Hell, USA

**A synopsis is a longer summary of your work, complete with chapter divisions. You would include the main characters and action. It's much like a treatment for a screenplay. There is a good example of a query and also of a synopsis in "The Guide to Literary Agents."


**For a fantastic example of proper manuscript formatting, click here.

**For an extensive list of magazines/book publishers out there and their average response times, click here

Some additional tips for query writing: take yourself seriously. Speak definitively (I.e. "I'm a writer, and I have a story/novel that I think fits your needs perfectly). If you want others to believe in you and spend money on your work, you must believe in yourself. You have a finished manuscript. You've labored over this baby for eons. Be proud! Also, tailor your query to each and every publisher you solicit.

Show them you've done your homework. Order a copy of their magazine if you're submitting poetry/short stories. If it's a novel, research other authors that the company publishes. Give the editor feedback. Be sincere. I just read a copy of "The Horror Library" that kept me up till dawn and gave me amazing nightmares. I e-mailed the editor the next day to thank him.

If you've done your homework and you've found a company that publishes work like yours, give it a shot. It's really worth the extra time and money to find the right fit. Better to query 5 well-chosen houses than 50 that may not work for you. The acquisitions editor (the person who first reads your manuscript) will appreciate it.

How to go about finding the right publisher? For writers in the U.S, Canada and the U.K, check out "The Novel and Short Story Writer's Market." There's also "The Guide to Literary Agents" and "The Poet's Market." Get the most up-to-date version you can. You can buy a copy through amazon.com or at your local bookseller. Go through listing by listing. Get a good amount of info on houses you think might work for you. It might seem overwhelming, but in the end it'll give you so many valuable leads. Break it up if you need to, taking small chunks at a time. Also, if you order a magazine and enjoy the work of an author, look to see where they've been published. Chances are that might be a good market for you too.

In addition, search for message boards and attend conventions in your genre. The Horror Writer's Association sponsors a very helpful con every year—the World Horror Convention. Once at a con, go to panels, talk to other writers and have fun! If you run into a publisher or agent, it's not against the rules to pitch your manuscript, but introduce yourself and ask them if it's a good time for them.

If someone sends you a polite rejection letter—especially if they give you helpful criticism, take the time to thank them. I'm serious. They probably get hundreds of submissions, and if they've taken time to actually give feedback on a piece that they're not going to publish (i.e. that won't earn them any money), that's saying a lot about your work. Take pride in this, and don't get discouraged. Remember, in the end, you've submitted your stuff. That takes so much time, discipline and guts. Keep trying. You will make it happen. I try to have 3 submissions out there at all times. When I get a rejection letter, I just find a new market and go from there. It also helps to have a large and diverse body of work. By that I mean essays, flash fiction, short stories, novellas, manuscripts and poetry. That way, if you come across a call for stories somewhere, you may just be able to send away something you already have in your body of work.

(By the way, a standard length for short stories is roughly 3,000-6,000 words, and for shorts 500-1,000 words. Novels are usually somewhere upwards of the 60,000+ word mark (that being a short novel). Between that range is the novella. Poetry collections usually ask you to submit 3-5 poems.)

I'll say it again--don't get discouraged. Rejection happens. It doesn't necessarily mean that you suck. It means that your piece didn't fit the needs or whims of a certain editor. My first novel was rejected 30 times before I sold it, and I'm told that's a pretty low number all things considered.

Some other considerations:

Writer's groups—to join or not to join?
This one is a very personal call. I've attended one that was more drinking beer and bragging than giving caring, honest feedback. I'm now member of a private group that has been nothing but supportive, informative and challenging. As for the people you choose to read your rough draft, choose your writing partners very carefully. You should feel comfortable and welcome but challenged at the same time. No matter how good your ideas, it's often the push of another talented writer or a good editor that can bring your writing to that certain special level. You should also get the sense that the majority of members are serious about work and about giving helpful feedback. If you can find that, then I'd say that writer's groups can be a huge help—it's great to have someone there to celebrate your writing triumphs and to massage your soul when you get the inevitable rejection letters.

Do you need a BA in creative writing?
To that I'd say nope. I'll give you the pros and cons from my perspective. Cons: Sometimes, a lot of ego and profs that may not be as sufficient as you would like. You don't often get much instruction on the actual publishing process. A very close confidant of mine just admitted that he got a BA in creative writing from a top 50 school and he didn't learn anything about the actual writing process. That said, BA's in creative writing can also be enormously helpful. You're exposed to a wide body of literature (if it's a good program), and you may just find that special mentor that pushes you to new heights. You also may be able to do some very helpful networking. It's your choice. I, personally, do not have any of my degrees in creative writing. However, there are some universal essentials when it comes to honing your craft:

Discipline, determination, a willingness to admit that you can improve, among other things. It helps to be well read, and to constantly seek out new experiences. Having a good grasp of grammar is a good idea too;-)

On that note, some books I'd recommend along with the various Writer's Markets:

Strunk and White "The Elements of Style" (If you only read one book I recommend, READ THIS ONE).
Noah Lukeman's "The First Five Pages"
Stephen King's "On Writing"

Which brings me to my next topic:

Manners. I'm not talking about stuffy tea parties or life at Versailles. I'm talking about modern-day finesse. "Please" "thank you" and patience will take you far. Remember, editors and agents are humans too and respond to kindness better than badgering or out and out rudeness. Be conscious of the fact that they have hundreds of manuscripts in the slush pile (the pile of yet unread manuscripts). It may take them months before they can get to you. Always be polite to anyone who has shown you even a moment.

Kate Spade's "Manners" is a great read for the modern man or woman.
So is Candace Simpson-Giles "How to be a Lady"
and John Bridges' "How to be a Gentleman."

I'm serious. Savoir fair goes a long way. I've personally dropped people because even though they were talented, they were rude.

In the end:

Yes, you need to work hard to get a contract, but once you do remember that it should be a mutually beneficial working relationship. Have a lawyer look over your contract, and make sure that you understand it before signing. Haste makes waste, and oftentimes a lot of heartache to boot. Likewise, if your publisher doesn't give you adequate time to review your contract and makes you feel unduly pressured, go elsewhere. As for money, unless you self-publish, you should not have to put up a dime. However, additional advertising will be your financial responsibility.

Some great low-cost advertising methods include bumper stickers, radio spots, building a website, Myspace (heh, heh), and booksignings. When you get published, send a copy of your work and a brief bio to major and underground newspapers in your area. However, you can't guarantee a positive review, even if you send in a free copy. Still, you never know who might want to interview you or run a review—don't be afraid to ask! The worst someone can really say is no. I'm grateful to everyone who has proposed an interview with me, offered helpful feedback, distributed flyers or bumper stickers or referred a friend to my Myspace page, not to mention all who've supported me and offered so much love and magic on my journey. I could not have done it without all of the support. No writer lives in a vacuum.

So as you make your way along the journey, remember Whitney's 3 P's: Patience, perseverance and PBR. If you get frustrated, take a step back, have a beer and take a rest. (Um, a beer, not 10…not that I've ever done that or anything…speaking of health;-)

You can do it. I have faith, and I look forward to hearing the story you have to tell.

Love,
Whitney Lakin

Currently listening : Light & Magic By Ladytron Release date: 20 July, 2004

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FIVE NEW POEMS

I need

I need the city
like a drug
slow, muddy veins, eyelids half-opened shutters
needle rain
dawn bleeding into daylight
I need the city
like a woman
face covered in filthy black cosmetics
deisel breath
ripped and tattered nylon stockings
humid legs open in midsummer
sugared, sweat-damp flesh
stumble down the alley
a womb of broken glass and concrete
make love to me
conceive my children

(To New Orleans)

Lower Decatur

A temple
of steel and black ash
dance
with the ghosts
of the Corybantes
till the sweat flies
from pale brows
we fling our arms
around each other
taste deep
the Bacchic kiss
his eyes shine
twins gods warring
his mouth an altar
to excess
which needs constant
sacrifice

I-49

I ate heartily
of the gumbo,
ettouffe,
alligator blackened
on the grill out back
the thick yellow juice
caressed my chin
like a lover
who tilted my head up
to watch my eyes
as I took my pleasure
she sat there
her stomach rumbling
empty cargo clattering
over the tracks
I offered up
a dripping fork
she shook her head no
cigarettes and whisky
a born sculptor
whittling herself
down
to angles and bone

One day


One day...

they move electroclash:

apricot light pulsing
in their plasma

backs to the mirror

bass humps the vocals in their black licorice dance.

Candy mouths, deadshock tounges
they hum as they vibrate
molecule by molecule...

never too much pressure
on a single atom!

Their lips:

twin cherry nightmares
dripping vinyl fruit
saliva the psychotic red
of tagada strawberries
soaked too long in vodka and
promises

Boykill

Jeweled in the morning
I have tasted the dew
the ruby cool
of dawn's fresh kill
I have felt the friction
of a single button
start a fire
in this house
I have run my tongue
across the smooth skin of evening
and rolled in sheets
hot like fresh snow

For more, check out the "in print" section of my website, www.whitneylakin.com.

Currently listening : American Doll Posse By Tori Amos Release date: 01 May, 2007

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