Poem: Release
Current mood: contemplative
Category: Writing and Poetry

Vigilant I remain
Through things that are unclear
Nothing to be afraid of
Except for fear

Cold man, hard man
The image I portray
Peak over the wall of this heart
And the image is blown away

See me for who I am
Understand what you see
Accept what is before you
Or just let it be

Be mindful of your own how you hold this
Fragile little thing that it is
Hold it steady and true
Or watch it blow away into the abyss

A small little bird
Unaware of what it represents
As soon as it flies away
So would be this turn of events

If you love something, set it free
If it comes back, its yours forever
So the lil bird in the cage will wait
Behind the wall of stone that is not stone
For that time.....
However, whenever, wherever........



© 2008, Emanuel Sanchez/SirHavoc. All rights reserved.
No republication of this material, in any form or medium, is permitted without express permission of the author.

8:45 PM - 3 Comments - 4 Kudos - Add Comment

Inadequate Words
Current mood: Introspective
Category: Introspective Writing and Poetry

verbal expressions.....
feeble attempts to convey a message
no matter what is said nor how it is said
words will always remain inadequate
through song
through poem
through letters or phone conversations
nothing said seems to fill the void
seems to get across that all important message
whatever that message may be.....
regardless of the verbiage.....
no matter the efforts
all is wasted
for the words themselves have no soul nor passion
they have no life
they are like plastic fruits in a plastic bowl on display
all surface and nothing but emptiness inside
for emotion and feeling cannot be embodied by words
they refuse to be limited by simple strings of letters
put together for the sake of confusion and nothing more
for even these words here will be misinterpreted
and such an injustice will that misinterpretation be
if only we could communicate through actions
a smile here
or hug there
a gesture occasionally
only then could these lame and clumsy words
be cast aside so that
messages may be passed and understood
for what they truly are
and we'd no longer struggle with these
inadequate words
and waste our time
ever again


© 2008, Emanuel Sanchez/SirHavoc. All rights reserved.
No republication of this material, in any form or medium, is permitted without express permission of the author.

11:44 AM - 6 Comments - 6 Kudos - Add Comment

Poem: Missing.....
Category: Writing and Poetry

Have you seen me?
I can't seem to find myself...
I'm looking all over the place,
And I can't be found anywhere.

I've looked in the only place I have ever seen myself
But no matter what angle or how many times I look
That mirror doesn't show me anymore

I don't know who has replaced me in the mirror
It's a person I don't recognize
A nasty person that mocks me and imitates me
And tells me that I'm gone forever

I am now reduced to the only thing I can think of
I'm placing a missing person blog here
Figuring SOMEONE has seen me
HOPING that someone has seen me

I know myself feels lost and I feel lost without myself
So I appeal to the kindness of the public

I'm feeling desperate now
I need to get that person in the mirror out of there
And get myself back in there
'Cause I don't like who's looking back at me

Please reply
Or
At the very least
Repost this

Someone out there has to have seen me

Thank you for all of your kindness.....


© 2008, Emanuel Sanchez/SirHavoc. All rights reserved.
No republication of this material, in any form or medium, is permitted without express permission of the author.

8:12 PM - 8 Comments - 7 Kudos - Add Comment

Mountain Top
Category: Writing and Poetry

I saw the Hand of God today. It came through the clouds so slowly that to glance at it, you would take it for granted and mistake it for a cloud. But, I watched intently with the eyes in my heart and soul and I know I am not mistaken. It was the Hand of God and it came through the clouds and lovingly caressed the mountain tops and gently wiped away the Tears of the Sun with a wisp of cloud and a breath of a breeze. My eyes almost bled tears to witness such beauty and comprehend it for what it was.....

An act of Love by the Hand of God for one of His most greatest creations: a mountain top. The incredible beauty of Nature, unblemished by the Taint of Man...

© 2008, Emanuel Sanchez/SirHavoc. All rights reserved.
No republication of this material, in any form or medium, is permitted without express permission of the author.

3:38 AM - 2 Comments - 4 Kudos - Add Comment

Poem: Funny Love
Current mood: vexed
Category: Writing and Poetry

It's funny Love 'cuz you don't even know me

You've had plenty of chances, but proof you couldn't show me

So resigned we are to live a life so lonely

It could have been so much different if only.....

...you would have taken your focus off of my mind 

My talent you recognize at any place, anytime

Infatuated with how I put it line after line

And so you've been lost to the rhythm and rhyme

My words painting pictures so detailed you could trace it

Scenes of splendor so beautiful you couldn't face it

Alone now I stand here, my feelings so basic

My heart left outside, neglected and wasted

So I don't lose you, I feed you verse after verse

You drink in my poems as if they're quenching your thirst

It's mind-numbing work, this gift is my curse

So deep that I've gone, I can't put myself first

Only my thought processes hold you in sway

I've tried to get through to you day after day

These same thought processes have kept you at bay

From seeing my face and showing you the way

I'm done with this now, this is the final chance

You prove to me now, no song and no dance

Make me believe in love and romance

Or I swear I'll walk away without a second glance

I stand before you now, if you love me then show me

You look in my eyes saying "it's real love, not phony"

That's funny Love, 'cuz you don't even know me

I shake my head with a sad smile and walk away slowly.....

© 2008, Emanuel Sanchez/SirHavoc. All rights reserved.
No republication of this material, in any form or medium, is permitted without express permission of the author.

1:53 AM - 6 Comments - 10 Kudos - Add Comment

so I sit here......
Current mood: bored
Category: Writing and Poetry

and ponder nothing in particular while i'm overwhelmed by the misdeeds of others. does it ring true when lies abound and truths are covered with the dirt of rumors? i sit here...and ponder. i think of simple times.....and keep thinking as my minds wanders the deserted halls of my cranium. i search in every nook and cranny. every dusty, dark corner. i come up empty. i keep wandering aimlessly so as to let something unseen guide my feet and lead me to a place where I might find this elusive "simple time". how sad must a life be when one can't find anything worth finding within one's own head? ahhh the despairs of an overworked mind. the tragedy of not being able to see right under a nose too big. eyes looking straight ahead when all the beauty is afoot. these walls and these halls....this barren place where echoes fall short of recognition. wait.....?!?!?! is that a voice? who dares enter my domain of solitude? who has the audacity to trespass on my own private time? shhhhhhhhhhhh. lisssstennnnn...... thats my voice. yep. i can hear it now. damn acoustics in this place are crazy. should i chase the voice is what i wonder as i shuffle my feet slowly in no hurry to get where i'm not going. i keep moving along. looking left i see a mural. damn! i ain't know i had one of those in here. it shows a better time where smiles were capable yet the mural is old and the smiles are faded in time and shadows of other not so smiling times crowding in on this time here. i stand and drift for a minute not focused on anything. forgetting my search for a "simple time". this mural here reminds me that my efforts are wasted for my search will be fruitless. that "simple time" is a fleeting thing as was the smile that traipsied along a now dusty path. i keep moving even as i'm compelled to look back. but i don't look back. i can't look back. my body won't let me. i'm saddened as this realization hits me. i can't go back. as the path before me opens up with each step, so does the path behind me close in after each foot is lifted so that backtracking is impossible. sigh. such is life. hey! look over there to the right! do you see that? i do. did. didn't. damnit. i thought i saw it but didn't. don't even know what i thought i saw that i never saw but again i'm saddened at the fact that i missed out on something. i feel it was important and that means something in this place here. it meant something and it passed me by without so much as slowing down for a nanosecond. the respect i don't get in my own place here. so where does it end? i see no end in sight. am i just not able to get a grip on this or does it truly keep going on and on and on? no it doesn't. reality hits me in the legs as i realize that i just sat here all this time and let my mind wander of its own accord to places unknown to me. a dangerous traverse for my mind. i'll have to take leave for now as i try to make an assessment of my mental state and see if it made it back in one piece from that scary place that does a good impression of a brain in a solid cranium (with a crack so obvious, its never seen by most.....but EYE know its there)..................

7:37 PM - 3 Comments - 7 Kudos - Add Comment

Your Ni**a NAS
Current mood: thoughtful
Category: Music

I copped that new NaS album this week but only opened it yesterday. I usually go thru the lil booklet and when I got to the back of this one, I saw the following which I thought was pretty deep. I enjoyed his opinions and thoughts enough to want to share them with you here, so here they are exactly as it reads from the cd booklet:


"Ni**er" or "ni**a", not even the lesser evil "negro", could ever be our title. We are way more complicated, beautiful and intelligent than any word created for us. Africa isn't even a name we chose for the continent. But hey...it is what it is. Some things just stick and are hard to change. What would be a proper name for us? Think about it. We should decide on it. I don't think it matters much but, with that said, racial bias will probably never die. You would think in this day and in these times, with all that's going on all over the planet, we should be past this. I want to be past this but it seems like some things don't go away. Instead they get more dangerous and worse. Ni**er is a word that comes from the horrible African-American slave trade. That slave trade is a massive part of American history but people want to sweep it under the rug like it never existed. They get uncomfortable when it's talked about, yet we are constantly killed by the police, and our youth thrown in jail daily for doing nothing illegal at all. Nobody cares. And can you believe hateful people are outraged when a black politician does something positive to help black people like it's a crime. So sad we Americans are. I believe there are tons of things happening in the world that people are not ready to know, or couldn't handle mentally if we did know. So stop saying sh*t like affirmative action was enough payment and stop asking why are we complaining, affirmative action helps all minorities, not just blacks. Reparations are past due. I pray the world changes for the better for everybody. Until then teach the kids the truth, pray we see this black man - not a ni**er - win the presidential election. It's about time America - all people live your life. The struggle continues. Live your life. Drive your Benz's. You are royalty. Wear your jewels. Work hard but play harder. Wear that fly fashion sh*t or your culturally aware gear. Stay fresh to def. Smoke your weed. Protest, you have a voice - use it. Be happy. Travel the world. F**k, drink eat great food, create hobbies. Get away from hateful people - only deal with loved ones! One million ones! (One love)

Currently listening : Nas By Nas Release date: 2008-04-15

6:45 AM - 3 Comments - 4 Kudos - Add Comment

Poem(?): untitled
Category: Writing and Poetry

You are because I am

I am because of He

He is because He was

His presence came to be

Now here we are

Thinking of how it seems

Opinions clouding our judgment

Foresight is never easy

Where were we going with this?

I'll be quiet now and let you proceed

He is what you try to be

I am as I ever was...

Simply Me

© 2008, Emanuel Sanchez/SirHavoc. All rights reserved.
No republication of this material, in any form or medium, is permitted without express permission of the author.

3:30 PM - 4 Comments - 5 Kudos - Add Comment

Poem: Doctors Visit
Category: Writing and Poetry

I wasn’t feeling well, so I went to the doctor.

The doctor said "Son, what seems to be the problem?"

I said "Doc, I’m sick. I gots it BAD Doc. I needs me an inoculation ASAP. I been bit by the Love Bug!"

The doctor said "Well, now, what makes you think that? What are the symptoms?"

"Well Doc," I said, "you see...it’s like this...," I continued, "my heart hurts REAL bad-like."

"That doesn’t mean too much by itself now..." the doctor said.

"Also, I’m havin’ trouble focusin’ & concentratin’ Doc." I said. "My thoughts be goin’ in all sorts a directions at once. THEN, out of nowhere, I starts gettin’ all hot & my palms be gettin’ sweaty & my heart be just a’poundin’ away like a caged animal tryna get out!

*The doctor leans back thoughtfully as I lean forward in my fervor.*

"Then," I continue, "my mind gets to playin’ tricks on me ’cause I be feelin’ all sorts of happy one minute and the next I’m feelin’ all melancholy and morose."

"Those are some big words," the doctor says, "You sure you know what they mean?

I said "Sure do Doc, I learned them words talkin’ to a friend. They is REAL smart-like."

"Well," the doctor said, "Son, looks like you’ve been bitten by what is known as ’Insecto-Amorelius’ which is commonly known as the ’Love Bug’."

I said, "Well THERE you have it, I just KNEW it!"

"Listen," the doctor said, "I have some good news and some bad news."

*I sat in anxious anticipation...*

"The good news is you won’t die from this..."

*Slight smile of relief on my face*

"...however," the doctor continued, "there is nothing I can do or anything I can give you for this. The ’poison’ of the Love Bug’s bite acts kind of like a drug, so you will experience some withdrawl symptoms and I can’t tell you how long these will last."

The doctor continued "Also, it has attributes that make it very similar to a virus which can only be left to run it’s course. You’ll need to keep yourself active, so that your immune system can stay strong and fight this off on it’s own. If you do not stay active, it can replicate itself and consume you."

"But Doc, that sounds an AWFUL lot like I can die from this, if this thing ’consumes’ me." I continued, "I don’t want nothin’ to be consumin’ me."

The doctor said "Now listen son, this is why I am telling you what you need to do. You won’t, nor CAN you, die from this. It can change you indefinitely though, but you won’t die."

"Now go and keep yourself busy. Come check with me in a month or so to follow up," the doctor said.

I left with my head hung low and asked on my way out "Hey Doc, you SURE I’m gonna be ok?"

He replied, "Sure thing son, just do as I told you."

I kept walking and the doctor closed the office door and shook his head in sympathy as he thought to himself "Poor lil bugger, he never knew what hit him..."

© 2008, Emanuel Sanchez/SirHavoc. All rights reserved.
No republication of this material, in any form or medium, is permitted without express permission of the author.

7:18 AM - 16 Comments - 11 Kudos - Add Comment

Poem: Only A Hug
Category: Writing and Poetry

Tentative

Fearful

Afraid to fall inside

Afraid of Love’s Divide

Afraid of what’s to see

Afraid of what could be

Afraid of what’s within

Afraid

Because it’s not a Sin

If only it can be embraced

Afraid to see a true face

Afraid to not let go

You know it’s not just for show

Afraid

Because you know it’s real

Afraid to want

To have

To feel

Afraid to admit it’s inevitable

Afraid

Because it’s so incredible

Think about it

Consider it

Brush it off with a shrug

It’s such a simple thing

It’s only a hug......

© 2008, Emanuel Sanchez/SirHavoc. All rights reserved.
No republication of this material, in any form or medium, is permitted without express permission of the author.

3:13 PM - 6 Comments - 8 Kudos - Add Comment