Alan partridge Wallpapers (sponsored by £-stretchers)
Current mood: contemplative

Here are your Alan Partridge desktop wallpapers. If you need help making them work check out the instructions PC and Mac below.
mauve mood 640 x 480 800 x 600 1024 x 768	ice white 640 x 480 800 x 600 1024 x 768	sports desk 640 x 480 800 x 600 1024 x 768	lap dance 640 x 480 800 x 600 1024 x 768
Radio Norwich 640 x 480 800 x 600 1024 x 768	let's chat 640 x 480 800 x 600 1024 x 768	man of sport 640 x 480 800 x 600 1024 x 768	easy listening 640 x 480 800 x 600 1024 x 768
wathership Alan 640 x 480 800 x 600 1024 x 768	blue mood 640 x 480 800 x 600 1024 x 768	Alan and Michael 640 x 480 800 x 600 1024 x 768	Alan's House 640 x 480 800 x 600 1024 x 768
Knowing Yule 640 x 480 800 x 600 1024 x 768	Alone at Christmas 640 x 480 800 x 600 1024 x 768	Alantage 640 x 480 800 x 600 1024 x 768	The Man 640 x 480 800 x 600 1024 x 768
To download and install the desktop images, follow these instructions: Windows 95, 98, 2000 and NT Choose the size of wallpaper you require. The options are small (640 x 480); medium (800 x 600) or large (1024 x 768). Click on one of the options and a bigger image will appear in a new browser window. Move your cursor (pointer) over the big image. Right click your mouse and a 'drop down' menu will appear. Go to 'set as wallpaper'. Finally left click your mouse. Your new wallpaper will appear on your desktop. To find out the best size for you, right mouse-click on your desktop, select 'properties,' a pop window will appear; select 'settings' and note the dimensions in the section called 'screen area.' Mac 0S 8/8.5 Download the image by clicking and holding down the mouse. Click on the Apple icon in the top left-hand corner of the screen. Go to control panels, click on 'Appearance'. Six menu items are shown - choose 'Desktop'. Click on 'Place Picture' and choose the image that you downloaded from the web site. Click 'Set Desktop' button

Currently reading : Follow That Bird: Around the World With a Passionate Bird Watcher By Bill Oddie Release date: September, 1997

7:30 AM - 10 Comments - 17 Kudos - Add Comment

Inviting me to 'events'
Current mood: crushed

Let me just make one thing clear. To get someone of my standing to attend one of your 'events' costs money! I don't want to be vulgar but we're talking 3 figures! Bill Oddie got £450 for showing up to a charity Wurzels concert and giving out straw hats with combine harvesters embroided in them...and that was for sick kids! So no I won't come and see your band 'Hollowcock' at the Ferryboat Inn in Norwich....even if it is less than a 25 minute drive from 'Ye House'.....and the parking's good....and in house food really is first class.

Anyhow I'm going off the subject, what I'm saying is you better talk to Lynn and talk money if you're thinking of inviting me to your gig.

Currently reading : Michael Moore Is A Big Fat Stupid White Man By David T. Hardy Release date: 29 June, 2004

6:32 AM - 13 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

LISTEN TO THIS, IT'LL KNOCK YOUR SOCKS OFF!

People have been webmailing me about music that I play on my show so I've cut and pasted a list that some saaaaaad man compiled on a so called 'fan' site. The list is of all the songs that have ever appeared on the documentaries made about.....ME! If you click the little Alba speakers that appear beside some of the clip references, you can commit copyright theft! AH-HAAA!	I’m Alan Partridge - Series One
		Episode One - A Room With An Alan - Joni Mitchel - Big Yellow Taxi - Mention of ELO - Yazoo - Don’t Go - Queen - Killer Queen - Deep Phunky Clav (Lapdance Music) - Mention of Chris Rea - Wings - Jet - Kate Bush - The Man With The Child In His Eyes - Mention of Huey Lewis and The News - Mike Oldfield - Portsmouth
		Episode Two - Alan Attraction - Thin Lizzy - Thunder and Lightning - thanks to Jimmy Gibbon - Mention of Chris Rea - China Crisis - King in A Catholic Style - Bryan Adams - Eighteen Till I Die - Steeleye Span - Gaudete - The Carpenters - Close To You - Jill sitting in taxi - ?? - Mention of Crowded House - Hot Chocolate - It Started With A Kiss
		Episode Three - Watership Alan - Mention of Kraftwerk - Blue Mink - Melting Pot - Mention Of T’pau
		Episode Four - Basic Alan - Mention of REO Speedwagon - Soft Cell - Tainted Love - Kate Bush - Wuthering Heights - Ding Dong Merrily On High - Shirley Bassey - Goldfinger - The Police - Do Do Do, Da Da Da - Go West - Call Me
		Episode Five - To Kill A Mocking Alan - OMD - Joan Of Arc - Mention of The King’s Singers - Blue Oyster Cult - Don’t Fear The Reaper - Jeff Wayne - Eve Of The War - Mention of ELO - Mention of Enya - Mention of Sinead O’Connor - Mention of U2 - Sunday Bloody Sunday - Monty Python - The Lumberjack Song
		Episode Six - Towering Alan - Japan - Life In Tokyo - Mention of “Einstein A Go Go” - Elton John - Song For Guy - Theme from The Generation Game - Mention of UB40 - Mention of Def Leppard - Mention of Wings - Mention of “The Best Of The Beatles” - Mention of Frank Sinatra - Mention of Nirvana - Theme to Black Beauty
		EXTRAS Add-on Alan: Mention of Cindi Lauper Mention of “The Oasis” Mention of Mike Oldfield - Portsmouth Mention of Mike Oldfield Soft Cell - Tainted Love Mention of Roxy Music
		Comic Relief 1999 - Mention of Carl Douglas - Kung Fu Fighting - Mention of Cliff Richard - Mention of Imagination - Mention of Sheryl Crow - Brian Ferry - Mention of Phil Collins - Against All Odds
		Comic Relief 2001 - Mention of The Beatles - “Oh Yeah” - Mention of Adam Ant
	I’m Alan Partridge - Series Two
		Episode One - The Talented Mr Alan - Mention of The Corrs - Jo Boxers - Boxer Beat - Mention of Rod Stewart - Mention of Shakin’ Stevens - Enya - Sail Away - Mention of Rolf Harris
		Episode Two - The Colour of Alan - The Police - Roxanne - Mention of Pink Floyd - Glenn Frey - The Heat Is On - The Prodigy - Firestarter
		Episode Three - Brave Alan - Level 42 - The Chinese way - Terence Trent D’arby - Sign Your Name - Matt Bianco - Get Out Of Your Lazy Bed - Brian & Michael - Matchstick Men and Matchstick Cats and Dogs
		Episode Four - Never Say Alan Again - Mention of Chrissie Hynde - Art Garfunkel - Bright Eyes - Mention of Spandau Ballet - Prince - Purple Rain - Theme to Return Of The Saint - Mention of Glen Campbell - Rhinestone Cowboy - Carly Simon - Nobody Does it Better
		Episode Five - I Know What Alan Did Last Summer - Iggy Pop - The Passenger - Mention of Madness - Mention of Annie Lennox - Mention of Bill Withers - Mention of Go West - Mention of U2 - Gary Numan - Music For Chameleons (also features on DVD menu) - Mention of U2 - The Joshua Tree
		Episode Six - Alan Wide Shut - Mention of Salt N Pepper - Ian Dury - Hit Me With Your Rythmn Stick - Mention of Bob Dylan - Mention of Monteverdi - Vespers - The King’s Singers - The Windmills Of Your Mind
		EXTRAS Add-on Alan: - Mention of The Bee-Gees - Mention of Bill Withers - Mention of James Brown - Sex Machine - Mention of 2 Unlimited
		Anglian Lives - Special Episode - The Human League - Don’t You Want Me? - Mention of Rod Stewart - Mention of Chris Rea - Mention of Bonnie Tyler - Elvis Costello - I Don’t Want To Go To Chelsea - Mention of The Clash - London Calling - Mention of Supertramp - Soft Cell - Tainted Love - Kim Wilde - Kids In America - Mention of Theme to World At War - Annie Lennox - Why?
		Add-on Alan for Anglian Lives - Unknown song as Alan clears his throat - Theme to Match Of The Day - Right Said Fred - Deeply Dippy - Mention of Sheryl Crow

8:49 AM - 11 Comments - 6 Kudos - Add Comment

I was stuck behind this lorry in traffic the other day.
Current mood: sick

I could have ruddy thrown up.

Currently listening : The Very Best of UB40 1980-2000 By UB40 Release date: 21 November, 2000

9:49 AM - 8 Comments - 6 Kudos - Add Comment

My Comic relief appearances...some of which you may not have seen.

Click to view/Download	Description	Size
	COMIC RELIEF 1999: Michael is dressed as a clown, and Alan gets to interview Brian Ferry...	6544KB
Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4	COMIC RELIEF 2001: Alan reports from Manchester (Mad-Chester) on young offenders are taking part in a 24 hour sparring session - featuring Tony Malony... Stole a Pony	5421KB 5455KB 4207KB 2915KB
	COMIC RELIEF 2005: Part 1 - Alan talks to the audience...	2700KB
	COMIC RELIEF 2005: Part 2 - Alan interviews the original Milkybar Kid...	3576KB

9:35 AM - 3 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

A message I recieved.

Here it is in it's full context from some village idiot called 'Pat'.

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Patrik
Date: Apr 29, 2004 11:35 AM

who da fuck are you?


From: Alan
Date: Apr 30, 2004 10:16 AM

I'm Alan Partridge.

7:15 AM - 16 Comments - 11 Kudos - Add Comment