Procrastination is the Mother of Blogging
Current mood: adored
Category: Blogging

I have a couple of apartment-related mysteries to solve.



1) The Furniture Moving Caper: the people in 905 (directly below my place) are constantly scooting furniture around. Imagine a classroom breaking up into discussion groups.



2) The Case of the Forgotten Christmas Tree: As I was walking through my parking garage last night, there was a Dead-Ass Christmas Tree next to the trash. Carpet of pine needles in the elevator. I got off on ten, and followed the trail of pine needles to apartment 1002. In my 2+ years of living at the Willmore, I have never seen anyone go in or out of there.



Currently Reading: Helter Skelter by Vincent Bugliosi

5:48 PM - 2 Comments - 2 Kudos - Add Comment

Depressing Night
Current mood: bored
Category: Friends

Friend calls and proposes that we go to The Roost. I agree, wait for her to call and tell me when to head over there. In the meantime, I engage in a phone conversation with my best friend in San Diego. We're bored, nothing really to talk about. He's trying to motivate himself to go out and buy a milkshake. Hey, let's find Casual Encounters on Craigslist for our respective locations/genders. Tee hee, this one likes science fiction. I wonder how fat she is. Late night skiing? What? Oh... Probably the cops.
We're still talking, he's playing online poker, I'm on level 14 of tetris. I lose, hang up, receive the least wanted text ever ("go ahead without me..."), take my makeup off, go to bed.

Currently listening : Tommy (1969 Original Concept Album) By The Who Release date: 12 March, 1996

11:27 AM - 2 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

BCAM Party
Current mood: excited

Celebrity Sighting:
Santino from Project Runway.

Currently listening : Alive 2007 By Daft Punk Release date: 04 December, 2007

1:48 AM - 0 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

Alexis the Streetwalker

Scene from tonight:

Leaving Barcade, 1:30 am. Cutting through laundromat parking lot (by myself). An SUV roars up to me, driver looks like that chef Rocco DiSpirito.

Driver: Can I give you a ride somewhere?

Alexis: Um, I'm good.

I keep on walking. I get to the edge of the parking lot, where SUV is now waiting.

Driver: Excuse me, is that your car right there?

Alexis: No, it's down that way. I'm really okay.

Driver: I'm not weird, but I'll give you a C-Note just because of your breasts.

Alexis: No thank you.

I walk to my car in a brisk but calm manner and get in as fast as I can (locking doors). Rocco-esque driver speeds off.

Currently watching : Vertigo (Collector’s Edition) Release date: 31 March, 1998

3:31 AM - 2 Comments - 2 Kudos - Add Comment

Mystery Mail

I've been waiting desperately all day long for my father to open an oversized manila envelope he received in the mail today. The return address says "Jules Verne Adventures USA". What could it be...a journey to the center of the earth? 20,000 leagues under the sea? Anyone who knows my father can attest to the fact that he is full of (often ridiculous) surprises. I will keep you posted...

Currently listening : Mentor Tormentor By Earlimart Release date: 21 August, 2007

9:21 PM - 2 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

A million scary things.
Current mood: scared

I'm reading this book, Lunar Park by Bret Easton Ellis.  An excerpt from the introductory chapter:

  "Regardless of how horrible the events described here might seem, there's one  thing you must remember as you hold this book in your hands: all of it really happened, every word is true.

   The thing that haunted me the most? Since no one knew what was happening in that house, no one was scared for us."

I've been having nightmares ever since I began reading it.  Let's just say that this novel involves a killer Furby, missing children, phantom e-mails and wet swim trunks.

I also made the mistake of listening to those creepy radio transmissions from Saturn. 

And now I'm at home, all alone, with every possible light on.

Currently reading : Lunar Park By Bret Easton Ellis Release date: July, 2006

9:20 PM - 1 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

Diarrhea-Filled Butthole
Current mood: amused

Perfect "end" to a great last few days.

1) Rain and wind on Friday night

2) 3Clubs celebrating Melinda's birthday
--- drinking with Alex
--- Baby Got Back

3) Rain on Saturday morning

4) L-A-D-Y!!!

5) Chaifa de Pollo

6) Maria's birthday party
--- Jack Daniel's (glug-glug-glug...)
--- Poop Predator in Nicole's bathroom (Jeff knows what I'm talking about)
--- Balcony (except the part when someone threw an apple at us)
--- Evan, Paul, Dave, Ezekiel (Solomon), Tim, et al.
--- Dance Fest
----- "Common People" by Pulp
----- Mr. Jingle Bells

7) Homeless donuts

8) Wig shopping/dreaming with Veronica (Large Fiesta Wig, salt-and-pepper color)

9) Elias (cousin, age 6):
-- "Why is your name 'Alexis' and not 'Awexis'?"
-- "Because that's what my parents wanted to call me."
-- "So you can name your kids whatever you want?"
-- "Pretty much."
-- "I'm going to name my kid 'Diarrhea-filled butthole.'"
-- "What if you have a girl?"
-- "Diarrhea-filled butthole-eena."

Currently reading : American Pastoral By Philip Roth Release date: 03 February, 1998

10:21 PM - 4 Comments - 4 Kudos - Add Comment

Jeopardy Look.
Current mood: busy
Category: School, College, Greek

You know that satisfied, triumphant look you give people when you answer a question correctly? That is called a 'Jeopardy Look.' Coined in the mid 1980s, when I used to watch a lot of Jeopardy! with my dad. This term is still used by my mom, sister and I on a near-daily basis.
Earlier this week I had my first session of Elementary Latin. As is the custom on the first day of sparsely-filled seminar classes, the teacher decided to do a time-wasting "getting-to-know-you" question-and-answer deal. The teacher's name is CJ and has braces. Naturally, I felt like being a smart-ass.
He asked the class if Latin was offered at our high schools, so I raised my hand (they taught everything from German to Tagalog at Long Beach Poly).

Transcript:
"So why didn't you take Latin in high school?"
"Because I was already taking Russian, French and Spanish."
Jeopardy Look.
"Oh, so you can read the Cyrillic alphabet?"
"Not really, because it's been fifteen years since I've taken Russian."
"Fifteen years?! How old--never mind, I'm not even going to ask. So why do you want to learn Latin?"
"So that I can read medieval manuscripts."
"(Laughs and applauds). I think that is fantastic."
Jeopardy Look.

Currently reading : My Sister’s Keeper: A Novel By Jodi Picoult Release date: 01 February, 2005

1:59 PM - 3 Comments - 2 Kudos - Add Comment

Why I love my family.
Current mood: salty
Category: salty Pets and Animals

My mom comes into my room and says, "a wedding just let out [from the church across the street] and they're the ugliest people. Come look!"

I show my dad my blistered wart finger (long story) and he says, "don't worry, honey. Your ugliest finger is still better-looking than my prettiest finger."

My sister and I were listening to a classical music station and the host mentioned concerti...
Alexis: Ugh, concerti?
Veronica: I know, what a douche.

**Bonus**
It seems that whenever I go sailing, our sailing companions think I am an adolescent. Last time, a woman was surprised to hear that I wasn't fifteen like she thought. Today, when I mentioned that I am on summer break from school, someone asked which grade I would be going into next year.

Also, the most pathetic ghetto thing I've seen in a while: I was driving down a low-rent street here in Long Beach, and saw a bunch of kids having the time of their lives jumping up and down on a mattress thrown onto the sidewalk.

Currently reading : The Best of Everything By Rona Jaffe Release date: 31 May, 2005

8:43 PM - 0 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

The Sleep of Reason Produces Monsters.
Current mood: groggy
Category: Dreams and the Supernatural

Well it may in some cases, but generally I just have weird dreams. I was in Laguna at a counseling office, where I ran into my old friend Dustin, who has been in love with me for at least 20 years. Last time I saw him he had really long hair, and in my dream he looked the same, except he was completely bald on top, and his hairline formed a perfect line from ear to ear. He offered to validate my parking, and then he started kissing me. I pushed him off of me and convinced Uncle Joe Benson (Legend/KLOS DJ) to get in my car. I agreed to drive him to Shutters on the Beach in Santa Monica, mostly because he was the rightful owner of our dog Charley and I didn't want him to reclaim her.
We were driving quite recklessly down Pacific Coast Highway, when we were stopped at a Golden Gate-type bridge that was blue and completely covered in snow. It was all a stunt, though, because all of a sudden an elaborate wedding party came through in carriages and sleighs. I walked through a snowy cave and on the other side was a Tuscan-themed beauty salon. I ordered a spray-on tan and was led into a beautiful treatment room with Borghese products and the most gorgeous tilework I have ever seen in dreams or reality.
Then my dad woke me up to say that I can't sleep all day, to which I replied, "But I'm sick. Besides, it's the medicine that's making me sleepy."

Currently reading : Crime and Punishment (Bantam Classics) By Fyodor Dostoevsky Release date: 15 October, 1996

6:04 PM - 1 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

Without Fail
Current mood: sick
Category: sore throat Food and Restaurants

I have a cold, and I can't smell a damn thing. Except of course the particularly offensive ointment I have to apply twice daily to my new tattoo. Have you ever smelled an x-ray film? That's what this ointment smells like. I swear I'm rubbing radioactive particles into my open wound.
The absolute worst was when I had my nose pierced, and they used some kind of antiseptic that smelled exactly the same way. Applied inside my nose. I couldn't eat for a day because I was constantly gagging from the smell.
Another current malady is that the fitted sheet keeps slipping off of the top left corner of my bed. Woe is me.
I don't have a funny or universal statement to end with, so this is it. I'm going to sleep.

Currently listening : Human After All By Daft Punk Release date: 15 March, 2005

8:14 PM - 3 Comments - 2 Kudos - Add Comment

The Hairbrush.
Current mood: artistic
Category: School, College, Greek

A few months ago, I received a curious parcel in the mail. It was a plain brown box, similar in shape and size to a box of checks. No return address. Inside was a purse-sized Goody hairbrush, still in the packaging, no evidence of having been used. I looked for an explanatory card or letter, but there was none.
Now it sits on my dresser, where it remains unused, its only purpose to remind me of the mysteries of life.

Currently reading : Crime and Punishment (Bantam Classics) By Fyodor Dostoevsky Release date: 15 October, 1996

1:49 AM - 4 Comments - 1 Kudos - Add Comment

Note To Self.
Category: Parties and Nightlife

Don't drink a bottle of wine solo when all you've had to eat today was See's chocolates and Salsa Verde Doritos.
PS: Also, don't try on old wedding dress. Particulary when that requires retrieving said dress out of a closet while standing on a rolling computer chair.

I'd like to take an informal survey of how often people's eyelashes fall out. I've been finding loose eyelashes quite a bit lately, and though they provide ample opportunities to make useful wishes, I need them to look pretty and stuff. How often do you find yours?

Does anyone know of any cool parties happening in the next few weeks? I've been feeling party deficient (ie, I need to make out with someone).

Drunkenly yours,
Alexis Louise Plattinski

Currently listening : Metallica By Metallica Release date: 12 August, 1991

11:26 PM - 3 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

Abandoned Child
Current mood: blank
Category: Movies, TV, Celebrities

My parents just left me home alone.
They're going to be in Spain and France until the end of May.
Weirdest thing my dad packed: Macaroni and Cheese. When I questioned him about this, all he had to say was, "you never know."
I'm going to subsist on eggo waffles and tubs of hummus.
The family dog, Charley, is already waiting by the door for them to come back.
We are independently lonely.
To top it all off, my sister is out of town this weekend, and Sunday is her birthday.
I am relying on you, dear blog reader, to keep me company during this time of need. Don't hold back on those comments and/or messages.

Currently listening : King of the Divan: Best of Plastic Bertrand By Plastic Bertrand Release date: 22 April, 2003

4:41 AM - 5 Comments - 2 Kudos - Add Comment

Spring Break!!!
Current mood: hyper
Category: News and Politics

So today is the first day of spring break. I have ten whole days off! This is what I'm planning on doing with my free time:







I'll be sure to take plenty of pictures!!!

Currently listening : Closer to God By Nine Inch Nails Release date: 19 May, 1994

12:49 AM - 2 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment