pamelavictory post

so this guy comes up to me and says, "what's the vision? What's the big
idea? I open my mouth and words come out like this...
The vision?

The vision is JESUS-obsessively, dangerouly, undeniably Jesus. The vision
is an army of young people. You see bones? I see an army. And they are
FREE fom materialism.

They laugh at 9-5 little prisons.
They could eat caviar on Monday and crusts on Tuesday.
They wouldn't even notice.
They know the meaning of the Matrix, the way of the west was won.
They are mobile like the wind, they belong to the nations. They need no
passport..People write thier addresses in pencil and wonder at their strange

existence.
They are free yet they are slaves of the hurting, dirty and dying.
What is the vision?
The vision is holiness that hurts the eyes. It makes children laugh and
adults angry. It gave up the game of minimum integrity long ago to reach
for the stars. it scorns the good and strains for the best. It is
dangerously pure.

Light flickers from every secret motive, every private conversation.
It loves people away from their suicide leaps, their Satan games.
This is an army that will lay down its life for the cause.
A million times a day its soldiers choose to loose that they might one day
win the great "Well done" of faithful sons and daughters.

Such heroes are as radical on Monday morning as Sunday night. They don't
need fame from names. Instead they grin quietly upwards and hear the crowds
chanting again and again: "COME ON!"

And this is the sound of the underground
The whisper of history in the making
Foundations shaking
Revolutionaries dreaming once again
Mystery is scheming in whispers
Conspiracy is breathing...
This is the sound of the underground

And the army is disciplined.
Young people who beat thier bodies into submission.
Every soldier would take a bullet for his comrade at arms. The tattoo on
their back boasts "for me is Christ and to die is gain."
Sacrifice fuels the fire of victory in their upward eyes. Winners.
Martyrs. Who can stop them?
can hormones hold them back?
can failure succeed?
Can fear scare them or death kill them?

And the generation prays like a dying man with groans beyond the talking,
with warrior cries, sulphuric tears and
wtih great barrow loads of laughter!
Waiting. Watching. 24-7-365

Whatever it takes they will give: Breaking the rules. Shaking mediocrity
from its cosy little hide. Laying down their rights and their precious
little wrongs, laughing at labels, fasting essentials. The advertisers
cannot mould them. Hollywood cannot hold them. Peer-pressure is powerless
to shake their resolve at late night parites before the cockerel cries.

They are incredibly cool, dangerously attractive inside.
On the outside? They hardly care. They wear clothes like costumes to
commmunicate and celebrate but never to hide.
Would they surrender their image or thier popularity?
They would lay down their very lives-swap seats with the man on death
row-guilty as hell. A throne for an electric chair.

With blood and sweat and many tears, with sleepless nights and fruitless
days, they pray as if it all depends on God and live as if it all depends on
them.

Their DNA chooses JESUS. (He breathes out, they breathe in.)
their subconscious sings. They had a blood transfusion with Jesus.
Their words make demons scream in shopping centers.
Don't you hear them coming?
Herald the weirdo's! Summon the losers and the freaks. Here come the
frightened and forgotten with fire in their eyes. They walk tall and trees
applaud, skyscapers bow, mountains are dwarfed by these children of another
dimension. Their prayers summon the hounds of heaven and invoke the ancient

dreams of Eden.

And this vision will be. it will come to pass; it will come easily; it will

come soon.
How do I know? Because this is the longing of creation itself, groaning of
the Spirit, the very dream of God. My tomorrow is his today. My distant
hope is his 3D. And my feeble, whispered, faithless prayer invokes a
thunderous, resounding, bone-shaking great 'AMEN!' from countless angels,
from hero's of the faith, from Christ himself. And He is the original
dreamer, the ultimate winner.
Guaranteed.

8:53 PM - 1 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

My Music.

<3
mewithoutyou
sivan
red lipstick death
the remedials
blessed by a broken heart
five iron frenzy
the showdown
showbread
blindside
mae
as cities burn
summers end
the faint
we.re all broken
12 stones
afi
fall out boy
aaron sprinkle
sixpence none the richer
stanely
overlook
zao
demon hunter
as i lay dying
norma jean
underoath
msi
frank sinatra
slick shoes
the river bends
last tuesday
the evan anthem
sides of the north
when sorrow fails
futherseemsforever
dignan
stretcharmstrong
project 86
xlooking forwardx
matt kearny
the firebird band
amalgram
red lipstick death
the remedials
fangs
headnoise
never the less
dear ephesis
benny goodman
the brain setzer orchestra
the adicts
kingston falls
a grand mock funeral
joshia
copeland
the pink  spiders
billy idol
romak and the space pilots
salem road

glenn miller

and much more.

5:48 PM - 1 Comments - 2 Kudos - Add Comment

About Me Kiddos.

Hi. Im Amanda
i will most likely call you kid from now on.
even if your older then me.
im not a just a christain, but a girl
after God's own heart.
im 18
i am prolife.
i can be pretty chill
but i dont like drama.
i have an extreme fear of annoying people
if i ever stop talking to you, its probably
because i thought you were annoyed.
if i told you music was my life
id be lying.
it plays a nice chunk in it
but thats not all im about.
i would rather have long converstations with you.
it doesnt really matter what its on.
i read. alot.
not so much right now...but i normally always have a book with me
im not single anymore.
this is jesse.

im afraid of relationships
i guess you could say
i want one though
[and now i have one]
one that has more meaning then just
sitting on a couch cuddling
but one where i can have deep converstations with you
about anything
life
death
hope
failure
future
today
tomorrow
God
love.
am i crazy for wanting more then just
'cute boring love'?
yes im pesimistic sometimes.
im afraid to get married.
this sounds childish to put in here but its true.
i do want to get married though.
i love kids
i adore phone calls.
from anyone, anytime.
it makes me feel important.
i bearly ever feel pretty.
im working on that one though.
i love going for coffee
and being at diners
the best talks are held there
i adore long walks
especially long walks at night
but only if i have someone with me
im afraid of the dark
but just the dark outside.
boys who leave silences
make me nervous
[so sometimes, i start to babble]
my parents are strict.
i used to complain about it, i still do.
i understand a bit more now that im older.
my curfew is pretty early but
if my parents know you and grow to love you
im allowed out until later.
but thats only if they trust you.
i will not get in a car if your intoxicated.
i wont put myself in that situation.
i will however say if your drunk and you need someone to talk to,
call me. ill be there for you no matter what.
[unless your being a jerk to me on the phone. then ill tell you to sober up before you call back]
im not straightedge, i respect the kids that are.
but i dislike drinking and drugs with a passion.
i dont plan on doing any of that at all.
im a virgin, if that scares you.
then leave.
im proud of it, ask me why and ill tell you.
im quite a social person.
i love being around people.
i would go crazy if i couldnt talk.
i cant cook at all
[unless you like venicen, then i can]
but im obsessive over feeding people.
oh, i can make mac n cheese
its best over a camping stove
with your best friends
at festivals
which are really corny
but only because theres little girls
as in preteen girls
in hooters shirts
dancing around in booty shorts.
i also dont wear shorts
i really dont like them
at all actually.
i do wear skirts though
i have alot from when i was in tenth grade
i used to wear one almost everyday once it got hot out
yeah.
that was overrated.
i waitress.
i love waitressing, but i hate my job
i stay for my costumers,
my old people,
and my frequents that come in and bearly ever tip
they amuse though.
im into makeup- theatrical makeup, special effects makeup
anything of the such.
ask me sometime and ill do your makeup for you.
im currently looking for people to let me play zombies with.
as in, zombie makeup.
i love candles.
i have a fireplace in my bedroom [its from the 1800's]
which is filled with candles because i cant burn fires in the fireplace?
infact, candles are everywhere in my room.
downfeathered blankets are amazing.
i dont watch much tv...
i love law and order:svu
its probably my favorite tv show
other then unsolved mysteries
and nip tuck
i dont watch many movies.
im normally not allowed to see them [the whole strict thing plays in here]
but i do watch disney movies.
alot of them.
my all time favorite movie ever is the fox and the hound
it was my first movie i ever owned.
[yeah thats right wayyyy back in like 1991?]
my little cousins borrowed it a few years ago
ive never gotten it back.
i probably wont.
[my birthday is in november.]
i loved the movie madagascar.
it was amazing.
i own three horses.
i love them
i dont ride them.
i miss my summer kids...
all of them....
the ones i met at festivals during the summer
and then ones i traveled with on tour.
and my camp friends.
and on the subject of friends.
i dont have a best one.
theyre all amazing.
just some are closer then others.
and well...im wrapping this up.
goodnight.
read poem below...
its the only one i think i actually like.

well here i am again.

as of this moment, this little space between time and exsistance i am finding that where i am, may not be where im supposed to be.
but honey, its an improvement.
to be honest, i dont know if im moving foreward
i surely know that im not standing still.
but while im here, make me a cup of tea.
ill take it to go.
those nights are over.
im laying in a bed now, as i was before
except now, i can feel myself drown into that inescablable whole of deep deep sleep.
am i finally overcoming this or have i just become?
for the more i sit here and stumble over words-
over meak, merely simple sized words of little intellegence;
[or is it the writer with the intelectual roadblock?]
the longer my tea gets cold.
oh baby, hand me some sugar
a teaspoon or two,
or you could just let it overflow into the little black pool
forming tall, disolving brown mountains of a sickening taste.
i really dont care
lemons can straighten that mess out
oh the saying, when life gives you lemons, make lemonaid.
i really dont think i like lemondaid
a pie would be much more deserved
not to mention well served
as my dinner guests change, some crossed off the list
it doesnt matter,
stop by tomorrow.///

1. EVER BEEN GIVEN AN ENGAGEMENT RING?
No

2. LONGEST RELATIONSHIP?
1/1/2 years

3. LAST GIFT YOU RECEIVED?
a purple plattypus beanie baby from mcdonalds...cause i was sick
i named him hector.
hes pretty sweet.

4. HOW MANY TIMES HAVE YOU DROPPED YOUR CELL?
alot. just look at it.

5. WHEN'S THE LAST TIME YOU WORKED OUT?
working out is overrated

6. THING(S) YOU SPEND A LOT OF MONEY On:
food.

7. LAST FOOD YOU ATE?
a cough drop?
or turkey O/filling

8. FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT THE OPPOSITE SEX? eyes

9. ONE FAVORITE SONG: The Soviet- mewithoutYOU

10. WHERE DO YOU LIVE? in pa.
but im moving soon.
tba

11. HIGH SCHOOL YOU ATTENDED? a junky one.

12. CELL PHONE SERVICE PROVIDER? cingular

13. FAVORITE MALL STORE(S): delias, i can never afford it tough

14.LONGEST JOB YOU HAD?: waitressing

15. DO YOU OWN A PAIR OF DICE?: no

16. DO YOU PRANK CALL PEOPLE?: no.

17. LAST WEDDING ATTENDED?: oh gosh...theres one today that im supposed to be at
im not there.

18. FIRST FRIEND YOU'D CALL IF YOU WON THE LOTTERY: my mom

19. LAST TIME YOU ATTENDED CHURCH: sunday

20. FAVORITE FAST FOOD RESTAURANT: subway?

21. BIGGEST LIE YOU HAVE HEARD? goodness...

23. WHERE'S YOUR FAVORITE PLACE TO EAT WITH FRIENDS? any diner

24. CAN YOU COOK?: haha nope.

25. WHAT CAR DO YOU DRIVE? i dont even have my permit
dont ask.

26. BEST KISSER?: i wouldnt know

27. LAST TIME YOU CRIED?: a few days ago

28. MOST DISLIKED FOOD: i cant think of it right now

29. THING YOU LIKE MOST ABOUT YOURSELF: i can get along with pretty much everyone

30. THING YOU DISLIKE MOST ABOUT YOURSELF: insecurity

32. LONGEST SHIFT YOU HAVE WORKED AT A JOB: 9 hours

33. FAVORITE MOVIE?: the fox and the hound.

34. CAN YOU SING?: no

35. LAST CONCERT ATTENDED?: the globe last night.
when am i not there?

36. LAST KISS?: HAHAH LAST NIGHT KID!
sorry im excited.

37. LAST MOVIE RENTED: ugh? havent seen a movie in ages

38. THING YOU NEVER LEAVE HOME WITHOUT?: phone

39. FAVORITE VACATION SPOT?: everywhere
i dont sit still

40. WHAT GRADE ARE YOU IN?: senior

41. DO YOU LIKE CHINESE FOOD?: sometimes

42. IS YOUR ROOM CLEAN?: not at all

43. LAPTOP OR DESKTOP COMPUTER?: desktop

44. FAVORITE COMEDIAN?: dane cook.

45. DO YOU SMOKE?: nope

46. SLEEP WITH OR WITHOUT CLOTHES: clothes.

47. WHO SLEEPS WITH YOU EVERY NIGHT?: my white teddy bear

48. DO LONG DISTANCE RELATIONSHIPS WORK?if you want it to

49. HOW MANY TIMES HAVE YOU BEEN PULLED OVER BY THE POLICE?: never

50. PANCAKES OR FRENCH TOAST?: neither

51. DO YOU LIKE COFFEE?: when i feel like curling in a ball.
ugh. i miss coffee

52. HOW DO YOU LIKE YOUR EGGS?: scrambled

53. DO YOU BELIEVE IN ASTROLOGY?: no

54. LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE? travIShxc

55. LAST PERSON ON YOUR MISSED CALL LIST?: some random number

56. WHAT WAS THE LAST TEXT MESSAGE YOU RECIEVED?: 'u up' juan truth.

57. MCDONALDS OR BURGER KING?: neither

58. NUMBER OF PILLOWS?: two but i can deal with one

59. WHAT ARE YOU HEARING RIGHT NOW?: mewithoutYOU

60. PICK A LYRIC, ANY LYRIC OR SONG? she wore that phoney smile on that face, i guess like a bandage on a wounded face


61. WHAT KIND OF JELLY DO YOU LIKE ON YOUR PB & J SANDWICH?:im not a fan of pb&j

62. CAN YOU PLAY POOL?: sometimes

63. DO YOU KNOW HOW TO SWIM?: of course, do i like it, not particularly

64. FAVORITE ICE CREAM?: ben and jerrys half baked twisted browning and cookie dough

65. DO YOU LIKE MAPS?: i dont much understandt them

66. TELL ME A RANDOM FACT ABOUT YOURSELF?: i have a devated septum...i can only really breath through the left side of my nose.

68. EVER ATTEND A THEME PARTY?: yes indeedy

69. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE SEASON?: that time where its not summer, but its not fall. i like the inbetween time.

70. LAST TIME YOU LAUGHED AT SOMETHING STUPID?: last night.
i thought it funny to throw my shoe at everyone


71. WHAT TIME DID YOU WAKE UP THIS MORNING ?: 10:50

72. BEST THING ABOUT WINTER?: mmm fire places and candles

73. LAST TIME A COP GAVE YOU A TICKET?: neva sukka

75. NAME OF YOUR FIRST PET?: jim dog

76. DO YOU THINK PIRATES ARE COOL OR OVERRATED?: awesome

77. WHAT ARE YOU DOING THIS WEEKEND? hoping not to get sicker, maybe movies, probably seeing noma, church, work, and part of show.
and meeting a bunch of kids from ny


79. WHAT IS THE THIRD LETTER OF YOUR NAME?: a

80. HOW OLD ARE YOUR PETS?: 18.20.21

81. WHAT COLOR IS YOUR BACKPACK? its a hippie bag, its white and

82. ARE YOU SICK?: i am


83. DO YOU GO TO SCHOOL?: yes

84. IS THE BATHROOM OPEN?: yes, and the door is always open

85. ARE YOU ON A LAPTOP?: nope

87. ARE YOU SMILING?: im coughing

88. DO YOU HAVE ON EYELINER?: no

89. DO YOU MISS SOMEONE RIGHT NOW? of course.

90. IF YOU COULD GO ANYWHERE IN THE WORLD WHERE WOULD YOU GO? i dont know

91. DO YOU HAVE A MYSPACE? yup

92. ARE YOU IN HIGH SCHOOL?: yes

93. DO YOU HAVE A CRUSH?: yes

94. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE NAME?: actually, theres alot of them. and i will name my children these.
austin texas
hunter stanely
spencer
felix
lucy
and BOOMER!


95. WHAT COLOR IS YOUR BATHING SUIT?: it looks like a bandana

96. DOES YOUR SCHOOL START IN AUGUST?: i dont believe so.

97. DID YOU GO ON VACATION LAST MONTH?: nope

98. HAVE YOU EVER BEEN ON A CRUISE?: nope

99. DO YOU HAVE A SISTER?: nope

100. ARE YOU UPSTAIRS?: yes

5:48 PM - 11 Comments - 14 Kudos - Add Comment