So this isn't entirely a drunken rant which I was silly enough to post online whilst totally and utterly smashed. It's the 'I've sobered up and am going to write something coherant and better-worded' blog. I actually had every intention of posting it as well...but then I got distracted and fell asleep. Ah the joys of being intoxicated and being exhausted from crazy dancing for hours.
Those phases in life where everything is going swimmingly are awesome. Everything has just clicked, the non-perfect bits seem not so bad, you've got what you want. And then something brings you crashing down to ground zero all over again, and the crap bits are even more crap then before.
We appreciate how good we have it, when we've had the not-so-great bits. If life was perfect and smooth all the time, how would be know how amazing it was?
Life was going pretty good. The family is all good, the friends are amazing as always, the boy side of life pretty good. But then a blast from the past brings it all crashing down. BAM! I'm not going to divulge all the gory details in a blog on Myspazz, but it was messy and annoying and fuelled by alcohol and a hurt pride. Let's just say I had the overwhelming urge to projectile vomit all over said bloke. But I didn't, because that would have been rather ungracious.
I got annoyed. Actually, not just annoyed. Furious. And drunk furious. For me to get annoyed is pretty extreme. Things that get other people good and riled up I tend to just brush off. Water off a duck's back. But I was hurt in the ego, and the wrong buttons were pushed.
Enter stage right crashing tumble from the happy place I had been in.
I don't want life to be simple or easy. I wouldn't appreciate it the way I do when I've experienced the messy and complicated and head-turning way.
So I haven't written on here for awhile. Stupid writer's block. That whole 'real life' thing gets in the way too. Such a shame we get busy right?
In a week I've learnt..
1. I realised that when the power goes out in your unit - only three out of a hundred of the units lost power - I'm not a happy camper. And I realised in a brutal fashion that desktop computers need power to run. So the slightly peeved blog about losing power? Didn't happen. And I might have done the whole 'why isn't my computer turning on? I need to blog about losing power! *thinks* *dawning realisation* Ohhh.....that's why it's not turning on...' thing.
2. Have a hot display photo in skimpy clothing/bikinis and you get lots of friend requests from random members of the opposite sex. True story. Pinkie promise.
3. The 'Game' sucks. The whole male/female interaction thing sucks ass. Hear that Game?! YOU SUCK! *shakes fist in random direction* Treat 'em mean, keep 'em keen? That idea deserves to be kicked in the kneecaps. Stupid how it works every time too. Don't hate the player, hate the game? Babes, I dislike 'em both.
xox i walked alone on the beach where we always used to go
I've already done one of these. You know, like anonymous messages to specific people, but in the public arena. Well not really anonymous, because obviously they're from me. But you get what I mean. And it's like free therapy.
*kicks Canada in the kneecaps* You are amazing. Please don't ever change. Please, Vegas? I thought you had class. I can't wait to come back and see you! So excited =) You're a rad chickie babe. So stoked I met you. Hello? Are you there? Helloooo? You know you're like an amazingly rad guy. And totally gorgeous. So stoked you're a mate. You're a nutter. Hilarious, a guy version of me, and completely insane. It's fab. She's a lucky girl. You're a cool guy. At least pretend to give a rats ass about something apart from getting laid. PS you were cuter before I realised you were a douche. Don't argue with me using facts. I don't like facts, they suck. Something about treat 'em mean, keep 'em keen right? I can't say no. Thank you so much for driving me. I would have been stranded if you didn't. You are a total legend. What the hell were you doing? Female cock-blocking?! I still got the guys, so it didn't work too well and made me think less of you. Your blogs are rad. Lulz@snickers bar. You're like super cute. And pretty awesome. And..yeah. Why do you talk so much shit about yourself? Noone's impressed. Definately going to have to ride together this time. I'm getting a pass woo! So...about your friend. He's cute. Congrats darl. I'm so happy for you =)
xox the sky's not falling it's just angels committing suicide; cause they're so saddened by humans using genocide as a political tool.
Your behaviour should go up your ass...
Current mood: sick
Category: Writing and Poetry
You know those people that always do what they want, when they want, and stuff what anyone else thinks or feels? That loud customer in queue at the coffee shop, shrieking into his/her phone. The obnoxious commuter on the train/bus/plane. Basically those obnoxious people you wish you could box the ears of.
And you know what? Those people that don't give a damn about anyone else are selfish. That's right, they are single-minded and purposeful in doing exactly what they want, when they want. And their attitude towards everyone else? "Screw them, I can do what I want".
Sure, you can do what you want. It's like you have the right to smoke, but by blowing that gross smoke everywhere you're infringing on my decision to be healthy. THANKS! By the way...if you want to quit, try cleaning the smokers area at the end of a long night. Makes me want to vomit.
Ok that was a slight tangent. But only slight...
I've noticed, that like avoiding smokers smoking, people avoid obnoxious people. Why? Cause they're a royal pain in the ass. Major, major pain in the ass. There's having your opinion, and then there's flogging a dead horse in *every* argument. Sure talk on your phone in public, but then there's shrieking out your nasty deeds from the weekend to scar the rest of us. There's getting through a crowd, and then there's clearing a path by wielding a handbag/manbag and overwhelming perfume/cologne. Sure, have an opinion in class, but don't argue with the tutor and declare that they're wrong because you think...
These are the people that think the world owes them something. And you know what? They're right. The world does owe them something. A kick up the ass.
*sigh* Sometimes you just don't need to be obnoxious. Stop arguing, or keep your voice down, and learn a little humility and respect for other people. Wow respect. Outdated concept right? Apparently to some people it is...
What/who is the most obnoxious and socially-unschooled person you've come across? Share the horror stories people!
PS. No I don't like mac's, and I don't agree with the argument that design software works better on them. IT'S THE SAME PROGRAM! PPS. Grrr at people who keep annoying me about macs. PPPS. Extra grrr.
Musings from the drivers seat.
Current mood: frisky
Category: Automotive
Well they're not so much musings. I did tell a slightly small white porkie on that one...but I've got an accent so that makes it ok =)
I came to a conclusion the other day. Just breathe now...in...out..in..ok now man up.
He who hesitates driving, crashes and/or gets eaten by other drivers.
How many times have you seen someone who's scared of the other cars almost cause a pile-up? Take merging...some wussy little individual sees another car within 100 metres.. *screetches to a halt* *causes 6 cars following to pile into each other* *scaredy person drives off, oblivious to carnage they caused*
Although on the other hand...I have other fingers. Hardy-hardy-ferking-ha. Noooo on the other hand there's those people that are "everyone else be damned none of you can drive! *zooms through traffic*'. I might possibly belong to that school of thought.
There's two types of drivers you do *not* mess with though. Bus drivers and taxi drivers, the latter being *the* most insane bunch of drivers ever created.
You know how buses say 'Don't overtake merging vehicle' ? It should be 'Do not overtake merging vehicle at risk of bus driver being a psychotic individual who will merge regardless of you being there, and quite possibly push you into oncoming traffic on purpose'. However, that would require a much larger sign, so the short message works well too.
*brb phone call* Ok back. Woo I have an interview tomorrow for a promo girl position =D *happy dance* Nevermind I'm already a promo girl. I want it all!
Ok back to the actual point of the blog. Hesitate while driving, and you'll get eaten/beeped/be the receiver of lots of creative gestures. Be pro-active and you'll quite possible get abused and merged on top of by a bus. I like that...I'm a 'pro-active' driver. Not a hoon (not that I could hoon in my car), not a menace on the roads, but a pro-active driver! So are you a pro-active driver? Or are you the person who annoys the crap out of everyone by driving below the speed limit?
xox i miss knowing someone's there for me
(I had to have this pic. It's so deliciously psychopathic)
So there's all these bulletins flying around about what a 'REAL boyfriend' would do. It's got stuff like: When she walks away from you mad - [Follow her] When she stare's at your lips - [Kiss her] When she pushes you or hit's you - [Grab her and don't let go] When she start's cursing at you - [Kiss her and tell her you love her] When she's quiet - [Ask her what's wrong] When she ignore's you - [Give her your attention] When she pulls away - [Pull her back] Etc. Etc. Aw. How cute. Can't you just hear the violins playing in the background? And the sound of guys everywhere retching... Whoever came up with lists like those needs their asses kicked. Stupid little spoilt princess biatches. Ok it would be awesome to have a dude do all this, but if you're not perfect he ain't gonna be either, and you aren't perfect honey. No, really, you're not. Honestly after a month or two, you end up giving each other the shits. If she walks away, dudes turn and waltz away too. Well maybe not *waltz*...but you get what I mean.
Come'on dudes. Why hasn't anyone come up with their own list of what a 'perfect girlfriend' would do? I imagine it could be something like this: When he looks longingly at the fridge- [Get him another beer] When he smiles shyly and nods downwards- [Go down on him] When he invites around his mates for a boozy gathering- [Invite around your hot single friends] When he feels un-masculine- [Make him feel manly by opening jars and fixing cars and stuff] When he says he's fine- [He's fine. Shut the hell up and leave him alone] When he ignores you- [He's trying to remember where he left his car keys. Shut the hell up] When he pulls away- [Your breath smells, get some TicTacs or something] Give me your best =)
I'm still lulz-ing @ the whole 'real' boyfriend thing. As in he's not imaginary and is a real person? Not a stick figure drawing? Although one could argue that a drawing is indeed real, and as that drawing is a real object it is therefore a 'real' boyfriend and who are you to discriminate against stick figure lovings, you stick-figure-lovings-discriminator?! But on the other hand there is that drawing of the pipe with 'Ceci n'est pas un pipe' written under it. French for 'this is not a pipe'. Which is true, it's not a pipe, it's just a drawing of one. So ergo you don't have a boyfriend which happens to be a stick figure, you have a drawing of your stick figure partner. Hmm, this could be super philosphical and rather confusing. Because let's say you had a picture of Brad Pitt. You can go 'woo I have Brad Pitt!' which means your an idiot because you don't have him, you have a representation of him, which is the picture. Anyone still following this? Can you explain it to me? Because I think I've confused myself and explained both sides of the argument as being the right one. *sigh*
But still...LULZ @ stupid logic. Wait...it could also mean that if a guy didn't do all those sappy schnookums things, then he isn't real and is therefore just a representation of himself, because a representation isn't real because only the object itself is real... *shakes fist at logic*
I hate trying to follow logic like that. I'm completely confused.
PS. Lulz (I'm totally loving lulz) at Miss America stacking it in Miss Universe. PPS. Lol even more at how the final five didn't actually answer the question they got from the judges, and went totally off tangent. PPPS. Who took all the categories and moods out of alphabetical order?! Uhuh. Not cool. Fire the work experience kid. PPPPS. Who invented running anyway? Silly idea.
Smooth Optus...REAL SMOOTH!
Current mood: distressed
Category: Web, HTML, Tech
If you're not in Queensland, you might not have heard and/or care.
Optus broke a fiber optic cable on the Gold Coast, and everyone in QLD on Optus has no phone services.
NO PHONE SERVICES!
NO PHONES.
No...*sob* PHOOOONES!!!!
*sits in corner and cries* *cries more* *does that weird hiccupping crying* *hides under bed until
We really only have 3 or 4 phone networks in Australia. Optus, Telstra, Vodafone, Virgin, 3 (in some places). We've got 8 states (including two territories), and now the second biggest state in the country is down a mobile phone carrier. The state is seven times the size of Great Britain. Some people in New South Wales are also having issues. See that red state in the picture? Thats Queensland.
It'll probably be fixed by the time I finish this. But that's not the point. *sigh*
xox thousand clever lines unread on clever napkins
This and that, add some random, and stir.
Current mood: selective
Category: Writing and Poetry
My bad for not posting for aaages. I know you missed me right? Right? Guys? Pretend? Pleaaaase?
*sigh*
There are some downsides to being a blonde mentally I have to admit. I'll be doing something, say on a train or driving, and I'll think 'wow I have an idea for a blog!' *stares out window and forgets idea*. Goldfish much? *stares at stars*
Ooo I joined a modelling agency =) I promise if I get famous I won't go Naomi Campbell and hit people with shoes. And phones. And scratch them. And...well I'll just be nicer. I was totally digging the outfit I was wearing yesterday down to the agency to get my photos done, I was wearing boots and skinny jeans with a button-down shirt and a pashmina. V. Ralph Lauren stylish.
I have decided, that if you happen to be bereft of bowls, plastic Chinese takeway containers are a perfectly acceptable substitute. Much better then saucepans anyway. The joys of student accomodation I suppose.
*yawn* It's 8pm and instead of getting ready to go out, I'm getting ready for work in 2 1/2 hours. *yaaaaawn* I have a story, and the moral is don't mess with the bar staff. We're friends with security =) *evil laugh* I have a nomination for Douchebag of the Year. (This involves a story). Saturday night, we're busy being a club/bar, and DB (DoucheBag) comes to the bar, and makes a fuss about how he's been there for 'half an hour'. Which he hadn't been. And then every time DB comes up thereafter, he's a class A douche. And THEN, he ordered drinks, and when I turned my back, took the drinks and walked off. Without paying. Needless to say, I wasn't thinking of complimentary names for him. (This is the part where my inner nasty-ass catty evil twin appeared, along with her colourful language). As DB was so memorable, I was able to give security a damn good desciption of him and got his sorry ass kicked out within ten minutes of him pulling his little stunt. *smiles angelically and slightly manically* Honestly, just be a darling, tip the barstaff and we'll love you. Mess with us and we'll make your night suck.
I feel like a grandma sometimes. I conked out early the other night, and got woken up by super loud music. After swearing black and blue about 'the inconsideratation of those young'uns', I realised it was 10pm. Sign me up for the retirement home already would ya. *sigh* *yaaawn*
Wow this turned into a super long/pointless/rambling blog. I'm so proud =)
I'm totally digging the version Thrice made of 'Send me an angel'. Perfect to crank up and sing/yell along to. Send me an aaaaangel!!!! Riiiiight nowww!! Riiiiight nooooooooooow!! *plays air drums and air guitar* I'm so glad noone can see this. Everyone has a song they *always* rock out to. Right? Guys?
Have you seen that - I think it's Kelly Clarkson - video where she tears the crap out of her ex-boyfriend's place, like seriously just destroys it? Psycho right. All he's gonna think is 'thank the jeebus she's outta my life'.
Wouldn't it be ever more satisfying to become super-famous and have him/her wishing that they weren't such a knobhead to give you up? And that said knobhead would never have a chance to get through your impossibly large entourage and won't have the good luck to be graced by your presence ever again.
As satisfying as destroying his/her stuff would be, you might possibly feel slightly bad afterwards. Who knew a conscience could be such a pain in the ass right. But if you became uberly successful at whatever you do, and he/she ends up in a caravan park (trailer park) picking their nose and living on government handouts...you win! And yes, there *is* a competition to out 'I-live-better-without-you-in-my-life' each other. Or is that just my super-competitive streak coming through...
Imagine the guys who are now kicking themselves for ditching Scarlett Johansson, Penelope Cruz, Miranda Kerr; the girls now wishing they had stuck with Eric Bana, Hugh Jackman, Brad Pitt. The people who go 'wow I was once lucky enough to be with them and now they're an Olympian/world-famous model/Oscar-winning actor-actress/CEO of a self-founded company turning over $500million a year/Prime Minister or President....And I'm sitting here in my grundy undies doing nothing.'
Someone said that living well is the best revenge.
So aim as high as you can, do the best you can, because there's gonna be guys/girls wishing they hadn't left you. And when that happens, you're going to be *insert fantasty here*, and not even remember their name.
Suddenly problems seem so insignificant...
Current mood: upset
Category: upset News and Politics
Channel 9 has a show called 'Amazing Medical Stories' or somesuch, and last night the show featured two pairs of sisters from England, and nearly broke my heart.
They suffered from a condition called 'Harlequin-type ichthyosis', which basically means the ABCA12 gene, among others, is completely buggered, and results in the child being born not with skin but with large, diamond shaped scales and facial and limb disfigurations. They can easily die from simple infections and are super susceptable to temperature change. They have to slather moisturiser on so their skin doesn't toughen up too much. They also need to spend an hour or two EVERY day in the bath to soften the skin on their bodies so they can move with relative ease. They might be missing their nose and ears, and their facial features are pulled back by the dry skin. They can get dehydrated easily as their skin isn't the best at keeping moisture and water in. Oh and to top it off, they are usually born bleeding.
Suddenly not having a perfect life seems kinda irrelevant.
One of the girls who suffered from the condition said that 'We're the same, we're just built...like this. Differently.'
I was touched by the way they had accepted it, and weren't bitter and resentful like one could have expected them to be.
Normally I would put photos in, but it's really quite distressing. For more info look here Harlequin . The link doesn't have any images, but it has a bit of info.
Candy mountain Charlie!
Current mood: triumphant
Category: Web, HTML, Tech
Of course everyone would have already seen Charlie and his adventures to Candy Mountain. (Smile and nod even if you haven't...don't admit to not having seen them)
Praise the lords of people-who-clearly-don't-have-enough-to-do-with-their-time.
There's a sequel! *happydance*
Part 1
Annnnnnnnd...the sequel! (This might be the best thing since sliced bread).
Feel free to quote the funniest parts of the movies =) ROFL Oh and don't remember to comment and remind me how awesome I am for finding this gem of time-wasting. Plskthnxbai.
I do love you all. I just love attention too =)
On the note of rofl...has anyone seen that video with the rofl-copters shooting each other up with LOL's? Tres funny.
We all remember the first time. Well maybe not the first time itself, but the aftermath we remember exceptionally well, and probably swore we would never subject ourselves to it again.
The cottonwool mouth. The room spinning and wobbling and behaving as if it was a hyperactive washing machine on LSD. The thumping pulse somewhere behind the left eyeball. The overwhelming urge to vomit, and the realisation that you have to sprint to the bathroom NOW or it's going on the carpet. Realising we don't remember anything from the night before, have no idea what happened to the hundred bucks that was in our wallet, and have no idea where our friends ended up. We swear next time it will be different.
And the realisation that we're probably going to repeat the performance again, very very soon.
Points if you know what I'm talking about yet.
The dreaded hangover.
*sigh*
The aftermath is awful. The night is usually a blast, but you come to regret downing so many drinks. Yet we do it again and again and again.
Anyone got any theories on why we inflict such pain on ourselves?
To year or not to year.
Current mood: rebellious
Category: Travel and Places
Did that headline make sense? If it did to you....good cause it didn't to me.
I was planning on returning to the USA for 3 months again at the end of this year, and to work and snowboard like I did last time. (Kudos to you USA for being awesome. Not as awesome as Aus, but still a solid effort =]).
And then I had a brainwave! Don't worry, I was startled too.
Why don't I just spend the whole year there??
Ok I would have to defer uni for a year, and then it'll be another year before I finish...but what if I did?
I have to admit...I love my 'why not' attitude. *gives kudos to self* Most people are like 'why' and I'm like 'why the hell not??'
I have no money skills, I have no assets except for my boarding gear, but I have lots of ambition and drive and dreams.
I'm pretty sure my parents wouldn't be too annoyed at me leaving again. Actually...and I love them dearly for this...they would probably encourage me to go. Well not encourage per say, but if I decided to go they would clap me on the back, load me up with Vegemite and TimTams and send me on my way. <3 to parents.
I mean, I go for a year at the end of this year or for a year when I've finished my degree. Either way, I'm still going =)
Hmm....dilemmas!
xox and they all went to heaven in a little row boat
ninja
pirate
vexed
sick
By the way...if you want to quit, try cleaning the smokers area at the end of a long night. Makes me want to vomit. 
frisky
distressed
selective
intense
silly
sad
irritated