On this blessed sixteenth of the month that is december, we sat down with a strapping young chap named Frankie Hill singer of the band The Last Troubadour. We spoketh about topics ranging from work, to movies, to video games, and even got to listen in on some dandy live music. The callers spoketh of swaffeling, bloody semi homo-erotic fighting and even the killing of endangered animals. Join us this fine week as we enjoy the company of others before the blessed day of christmas.
Also on the show. Our College Bowl Picks. Our UFC (the homo-erotic fighting I was reffering too) Picks and much much more.
this weeks show was jam packed. so go listen!!!!
Also Dont forget to go to Itunes and rate us, write a review, and subscribe please!
This week we talked about the decline in female morals in the united states, a fish with a ring, tommy tells us some interesting facts about his sex life, and DP and Jims explain why a new video game is the best game out today.
this weeks show was jam packed. so go listen!!!!
Also Dont forget to go to Itunes and rate us, write a review, and subscribe please!
dont be an idiot... Look up some info, then go VOTE
So I thought I'd post a blog on the info that voters near myself may wish they had when going to the polls tomorrow. Cause this is definitely an election that should not be voted along party lines. I think every election should actually be like that, too long have people just walked in, and selected names on one side of the ballot all the way down.
Just because a person is a republican or a democrat does not inherently make them good or evil, or give them good decision making senses or make them know what there talking about. There are quite a few issues that some people in government are either completely ignorant or just chose a view from old facts and refuse to change those views when new statistics and ideas come into play.
All you have to do is enter your zip code and you'll have links to every election from state high office and up that your area votes in.
Now again, this isn't an all in one center of information, its still ridiculous that voters in the united states have to go quite a bit out of there way to get any real information on any candidate. because most websites have an obvious political backing, where they spin the info to favor their candidate. And that's because the people providing this information are a business, and money corrupts everything.
So make sure to fact check the things you read. Voting is your obligation as a citizen of this country. but at the same time I urge you, don't just walk in, and vote party lines. Look up your candidates, see what they believe in and then vote. Be a voter that knows what their voting for.
I don't honestly remember much of anything about it other than that it was a scary dream... I remember a lot of horror movie like moments, mixed in with demons and chase scenes and the like. but I cant remember anything specific really.
I remember the last thing I saw... and then the last thing I heard. The latter being much more interesting than the first.
The last thing I saw was a man, and he was turned away from me, with his back facing me, and then he turned around and looked at me. Something about this must have triggered my conscious thought, because I remember thinking, "This is scary, I dont want to be this worked up again in this dream... GET OUT." so I remember thinking, and knowing it was a dream and I was able to wake myself up.
But the next part is whats interesting, as with my now rational thought on the idea I know it had to occur during my still sleeping self, but the fact I was in the midst of waking myself up, when I first awoke, led me to believe It had happened while I was awake.
I distinctly heard in an old man's almost crippled kind of voice "Fear the red". I was awake almost instantly after I heard this. And I originally thought I had heard it after I had woken up. but everyone else was asleep and so I know It was in my dream I heard this.
the other odd thing about this statement is it came from no one in the dream. When i first wake up if I stay still and think I can usually vary vividly remember my dream and almost walk back through it if there's nothing else going on to distract me, like a TV being on, or alarm going off. And I sat and tried to think who that voice could have been. It wasn't anywhere else in the dream... And it was VERY memorable, I can even remember the voice now. And like I said earlier it was very distinct and so audible that I had tricked myself at first into thinking I had heard it while awake.
Fear the Red. That's another strange thing, is that there was nothing in my dream that was distinctly "RED" or that had anything to do with Red. so why did my brain suddenly when I had already realized I was in a dream, and Had chosen to stop the dream, why did "Fear The Red" come into it?
I'm not one that believes in dreams telling me something, other than maybe just realizations of myself. there's no truth to dreaming the future. you cant know the future because it hasn't happened yet. But your dreams can bring to light things you oppress in your daily conscious mind because mainly your dreams are your brain just creating, and your brain cant create what it doesn't know. So if your brain knows something, then it can be thrown into a dream, this is the reason a lot of the time you can look back at the day before hand and pick parts of your dream from things you observed from that time that might have shown up in your dream.
But fear the red is different. I know there's nothing to be worried about, and I'm not going around avoiding red things today, on the way home from work I stopped at every stop sign, I drove next to a red car, and drank sweet tea from McDonald's which had a very bright red lid. I'm even wearing a red shirt at the moment. But i've never had this happen before in a dream. Never after consciously knowing something was a dream and purposefully waking myself up have I ever had anything in that dream happen between my decision and the point of me actually waking up.
It was a very weird moment. and has been in my head all night at work and all morning since I've been home. Fear The Red.
I know that's a very vague question, But its a serious one...
I see these "Kids" my age running around getting jobs where they wear suites and have to maintain a "Professional" appearance. But I honestly don't want a job like that.
I want a job where I can enjoy my time at work, yet not be expected to wear the ole suite and tie except for special occasions...
I feel like I have some Toys-R-us-Disorder Like I am refusing to grow up...
Here is my question, Do all these "Young-Professionals" do they just enjoy wearing suits?
do they not have like a mental thought process, of "I'm going to grow up now"?
I feel like If I were to get a job like that, I would HAVE to say to myself; "This is normal, I'm growing up. I have to look this way for this job"
And its not really even about the job... its more about the thought process that gets me... Like I feel like if I were to go into that "mode" that I would personally have to tell myself, "Ok, its time to grow up, I'm a grown up now"
But these other people that have, in society's view, "Grown up" do they think that? or is it a natural progression? or have they always enjoyed dressing up? I just don't understand it. Maybe I'm normal and people like that have told themselves it's time to be a grown up, But maybe I'm not, maybe I'm the guy that naturally just doesn't "Grow Up" I feel like a kid internally...
I'm 21 years old, and I feel like I'm not even an adult at all.
really, I mean I don't really fit in with the teen's anymore, I don't like a lot of whats popular now-a-days, but I don't feel like I fit in with the working people that are adults...
Like when I think about family get togethers, I feel like I don't fit in with the kids table, But again, I don't feel comfortable at the adult table either.
When I'm at the kids table I cant relate, But when I'm at the adult table I feel like I'm being judged by this standard that's un-natural for me to try an live up to.
I like being me, But I feel like society expects something else from me, I dont want to grow up yet, I don't want to have a kid and be a parent and worry about what I say or do in front of them, I don't want to be a role model yet. I still have role models! how can I be one?
I just feel like this world has all this that it wants me to be, but I feel like I have to sit down in my head and tell myself, well this is how it has to be... when naturally thats not the way I feel it should be!
Maybe its that I'm missing out on something...
I don't know, I feel like I am a kid, But maybe that's cause I'm living with my parents still, Maybe that's what i need to fix this mental block at being an adult. Like at work, I don't think of myself as part of the crew, I feel like some kid that is just working there...
Maybe that's the reason I'm so resistant to responsibility at work, Last year when they asked me to run a department I said no, and mainly its because I would feel like the kid that somehow became king... A lot of people under me would resent me, because there older, there more experienced, why should I be given the opportunity to be in charge of them.
that's another reason I've turned down promotions at work, I was asked to be the night crew leader, and I said no. Mainly because of the above, but also I dont think I can be in charge of someone that much older than me, seriously some of these people were in high school when I wasn't born! why should I tell them what to do? why would they listen to me?
I just feel like I'm stuck in this mode between teen and adult. Like i'm never going to fit in as an adult that does things Just because, or wants to do his job. because its his job. Or shoot, ever even remotely cares about the business he works at... Like when I work at krogers, I care that My stuff gets done on the hours I work. When the power went out a week ago, Alot of people came in to help out and try to fix the problem, alot of people stayed late and worked in other departments... I dont feel that sense of loyalty at all to my company... I buy stuff from biggs all the time! I buy from wal-mart all the time! I buy from kroger mostly just cause I'm already there. If I'm off for the day I need to buy something, More than likely i'm just going to choose whatever is closest to me... My boss's seem to expect me to care how well we sold something, or how good the floor looks... Thats not my job, and I dont care, I dont care if something in Isle three is out of place, thats not my isle!
it was the same with WEHT, I cared about my story, if we screwed up the entire newscast, as long as it wasnt my responsibility, I didnt care! I didnt care about our ratings, I didnt care about the morning show, I didnt care about anything but what I Was working on, and what I was responsible for.
Is that wrong?
Am I just a selfish person?
Or is this just something that everyone else thinks the same way but conforms to the social norms of pretending to care, and pretending to be a team?
Here is the article from RollingStone magazine I read recently
being sick isnt too bad, I can at least get some stuff done....
Here ya go, I encourage everyone to give it a read, I really liked it.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- The Lies of Sarah Palin By Matt Taibbi
I'm standing outside the Xcel Energy Center in St. Paul, Minnesota. Sarah Palin has just finished her speech to the Republican National Convention, accepting the party's nomination for Vice President. If I hadn't quit my two pack a day habit earlier this year, I'd be chain smoking right now. So the only thing left is to stand mute against the fit-for-a-cheap-dog-kennel crowd-control fencing you see everywhere at these idiotic conventions and gnaw on weird new feelings of shock and anarchist rage as one would a rawhide chew toy.
All around me, a million cops in there absurd post-9/11 space combat get-ups stand guard as assholes in paper-mache puppet heads scramble around for one last moment of network face time before the coverage goes dark. Four-chinned delegates from places like Arkansas and Georgia are pouring joylessly out the gates in search of bars where they can load up on Zombies and Scorpion bowls and other "wild" drinks and extramaritally grope their turkey-necked female companions in bathroom stalls as part of the "Unbelievable Time" they will inevitably report to there pals back home. Only 21st-centrury Americans can pass through a metal detector six times in an hour and still think they're at a party.
The defining moment for me came shortly after Palin and her family stepped down from the stage to uproarious applause, looking happy enough to throw a whole library full of books into the sewer. In the crush to exit the stadium, a middle-aged woman wearing a cowboy hat, a red-white-and-blue shirt and an obvious eye job gushed to a male colleague – They were both wearing badges identifying them as members of the Colorado delegation – At the Xcel gates.
"She totally reminds me of my cousin!" the delegate screeched. "She's a real woman! The real thing!"
I stared at her open-mouthed. In that moment, the rank cynicism of the whole sorry deal was laid bare. Here's the thing about Americans. You can send their kids off by the thousands to get their balls blown off in foreign lands for no reason at all, saddle them with billions in debt year after congressional year while they spend their winters cheerfully watching game shows and football, pull the rug out from under their mortgages, and leave them living off their credit cards and their Wal-Mart salaries while you move their jobs to China and Bangalore.
And none of it matters, so long as you remember a few months before Election Day to offer them a two-bit caricature culled from some cutting-room-floor episode of Roseanne as part of your presidential ticket. And if she's good enough likeness of a loudmouthed Middle American archetype, as Sarah Palin is, John Q. Public will drop his giant sized bag of Doritos in gratitude, wipe the sizzlin' picante dust from his lips and rush to the booth to vote for her. Not because it makes sense, or because it has a chance of improving his life or anyone else's, but simply because it appeals to the low-humming narcissism that substitutes for his personality, because that image on TV reminds him of the mean brainless slob he sees in the mirror every morning.
Sarah Palin is a symbol of everything that is wrong with the modern United States. As a representative of our political system, she's a new low in reptilian villainy, the ultimate cynical masterwork of puppeteers like Karl Rove. But more than that, she is a horrifying symbol of how little we ask for in return for the total surrender of our political power. Not only is Sarah Palin a fraud, she's the tawdriest, most half-assed fraud imaginable, 20 floors below the lowest common denominator, a character too dumb even for daytime TV – And this country is going to eat her up, cheering every step of the way. All because most Americans no longer have the energy to do anything but lie back and allow ourselves to be jacked off by the calculating thieves who run this grasping consumer paradise we call a nation.
The Palin speech was a political masterpiece, one of the most ingenious pieces of electoral theater this country has ever seen. Never before has a single televised image turned a party's fortunes around faster
Until the Alaska governor actually ascended to the podium that night, I was convinced that John McCain had made on of the all-time campaign-season blunders, that he had acted impulsively and out of utter desperation in choosing a cross-eyed political neophyte just two years removed from running a town smaller than the bleacher section at Fenway park. It even crossed my mind that there was an element of weirdly self-destructive pique in McCain's decision to cave in to his party's right-wing base in this fashion, that perhaps he was responding to being ordered by party elders away from tepid, ideologically promiscuous hack like Joe Lieberman – Reportedly his real preference – By picking the most obviously unqualified, doomed-to-fail joke of a Bible-Thumping buffoon. As in: You want me to rally the base? Fine, I'll rally the base. Here I'll choose this rifle-toting, serially pregnant moose killer who thinks God lobbies for oil pipelines. Happy know?
But watching Palin's speech I had no doubt that I was witnessing a historic, iconic performance. The candidate sauntered to the lectern with the assurance of a sleepwalker – And immediately launched into a symphony of snorting and sneering remarks, taking time out in between the superior invective to present herself as just a humble gal with a beefcake husband and a brood of healthy, combat-ready spawn who just happened to be innocent targets of a communist and probably also homosexual media conspiracy. She appeared to be completely without shame and utterly full of shit, awing a room full of hardened reporters with her sickly sweet line about the high-school-flame-turned-hubby who "Five children later" is "Still my guy." It was like watching Gidget address the Reichstag.
Within minutes, Palin had given TV audiences a character infinitely recognizable to virtually every American; the small-town girl with just enough looks and a defiantly incurious mind who thinks the PTA minutes are Holy Writ, and to whom injustice means the woman next door owning a slightly nicer set or drapes or flatware. Or the governorship, as it were.
Right-wingers of the Bush-Rove ilk have had a tough time finding a human face to put on their failed, inhuman, mean-as-hell policies. But it was hard not to recognize the genius of wedding that faltering brand of institutionalized greed to the image of the suburban American supermom. It's the perfect cover, for there is almost nothing in the world meaner than this species of provincial tyrant.
Palin herself burned this political symbiosis into the pages of history with her seminal crack about the "Difference between a hockey mom and a pit bull: lipstick," blurring once and for all the lines between meanness on the grand political scale as understood by the Roves and Bushes of the world, and meanness of the small-town variety as understood by pretty much anyone who has ever sat around in his ranch-house den dreaming of a fourth plasma-screen TV or an extra set of KC HiLites for his truck, while some ghetto family a few miles away shares a husk of government cheese.
In her speech, Palin presented herself as a raging baby-making furnace of middle-class ambition next to whom the yuppies of the Obama set – Who never want anything all that badly except maybe a few afternoons with someone else's wife, or a few kind words in The New York Times Book Review – Seem like weak, self-doubting celibates, the kind of people who certainly cannot be trusted to believe in the right God or to defend a nation. We're used to seeing such blatant cultural caricaturing in our politicians. But Sarah Palin is something new. She's all caricature. As the candidate of a party whose positions on individual issues are poll losers almost across the board, her shtick is not even designed to sell a line of policies. It's just designed to sell her. The thing was as much as admitted in the on-air gaffe by former Reagan speechwriter Peggy Noonan, who was inadvertently caught saying on MSNBC that Palin wasn't the most qualified candidate, that the party "went for this, excuse me, political bullshit about narratives."
The great insight of the Palin VP choice is that huge chunks of American voters no longer even demand that their candidates actually have policy positions; they simply consume them as media entertainment, rooting for or against them according to the reflective prejudices of their demographic, as they would for a reality-show contestants or sitcom characters. Hicks root for hicks, moms for moms, born-agains for born-agains. Sure, there was politics in the Palin speech but it was all either silly lies or merely incidental fluffery buttressing the theatrical performance. A classic example of what was at work here came when Palin proudly introduced her Down-Syndrome baby, Trig, then stared into the camera and somberly promised parents of special-needs kids that they would "Have a friend and advocate in the White House." This was about a half-hour before she raised her hands in triumph with McCain, a man who voted against increasing funding for special-needs education.
Palin's charge that "government is too big" and that Obama "Wants to grow it" was similarly preposterous. Not only did her party just preside over the largest government expansion since LBJ, but Palin herself has been a typical bush-era republican, borrowing and spending beyond her means. Her great legacy as mayor of Wasilla was the construction of a $15 million hockey arena in a city with an annual budget of $20 million; Palin OK'd a bond issue for the project before the land had been secured, leading to a protracted legal mess that ultimately forced taxpayers to pay more than six times the original market price for property the city ended up having to seize from a private citizen using eminent domain. Better yet, Palin ended up paying for the fucking thing with a 25 percent increase in the city sales tax. But in her speech, of course, Palin presented herself as the enemy of tax increases, righteously bemoaning that "Taxes are too high" and Obama "Wants to raise them."
Palin hasn't been too worried about federal taxes as governor of a state that ranks number one in the nation in federal spending per resident ($13,950), even as it sits just 18th in federal taxes paid per resident ($5,434). That means all us taxpaying non-Alaskans spend $8,500 a year on each and every resident of Palin's paradise of rugged self-sufficiency. Not that this sworn enemy of taxes doesn't collect from her own; Alaska currently collects the most taxes per resident of any state in the nation. The rest of Palin's speech was the same dog-whistle crap Republicans have been railing about for decades. Palin's crack about a mayor being "like a community organizer, except that you have actual responsibilities" testified to the Republican's apparent belief that they can win elections till the end of time running against the Sixties. (They're probably right.) The incessant pausing about the media was likewise par for the course, red meat for those tens of millions of patriotic flag-waving Americans whose first instinct when things get rough is to whine like bitches and blame other people – Reporters, the French, those ungrateful blacks soaking up tax money eating big prison meals, whomever – For their failures.
Add to this the usual lies about Democrats wanting to "forfeit" to our enemies abroad and coddle terrorists, and you had a run-of-the-mill, almost boring Republican speech from a substance standpoint. What made it exceptional was its utter hypocrisy, its total disregard for reality, it's total disregard for reality, it's absolute unrelation to the facts of our current political situation. After eight years of unprecedented corruption, incompetence, waste and greed, the party of Karl Rove understood that 50 million Americans would not demand solutions to any of these problems so long as they were given a new, new thing to beat their meat over.
Sarah Palin is that new, new thing, and in the end it won't matter that she's got an unmarried teenage kid with a bun in the oven. Of course, if the daughter of a black candidate like Barack Obama showed up at his convention with a five month bump and some sideways-cap-wearing, junior-grade Curtis Jackson (50 cent) holding her hand, the defenders of Traditional Morality would be up in arms. But the thing about being in the reality-making business is that you don't need to worry much about vetting; there are no facts in your candidate's bio that cannot be ignored or overcome.
One of the most amusing things about the Palin nomination has been the reaction of horrified progressives. The internet has been buzzing at full volume as would-be defenders of sanity and reason pore over the governor's record in search of the Damning Facts. My own telephone began ringing off the hook with calls from ex-Alaskans and friends of Alaskans determined to help get the "truth" about Sarah Palin into the major media. Pretty much anyone with an internet connection knows by know that Palin was originally for the "Bridge to Nowhere" before she opposed it (She actually endorsed the plan in her 2006 gubernatorial campaign), that even after the project was defeated she kept the money, that she didn't actually sell the Alaska governor's state luxury jet on eBay but instead sold it at a $600,000 loss to a campaign contributor (who is reportedly now seeking $50,000 in taxpayer money to pay maintenance costs).
Then there are the salacious tales of Palin's swinging-meat-cleaver management style, many of which seem to have a common thread: In addition to being ensconced in a messy ethics investigation over her firing of the chief of Alaska state troopers (dismissed after refusing to sack her sister's ex-husband), Palin also fired a campaign aide who had an affair with a friends wife. More ominously, as mayor of Wasilla, Palin tried to fire the town librarian, Mary Ellen Emmons, who had resisted pressure to censor books Palin found objectionable.
Then there's the God stuff: Palin belongs to a church whose pastor, Ed Kalnins, believes that all criticisms of George Bush "Come from Hell" and wondered aloud if people who voted for John Kerry could be saved. Kalnins, looming as the answer to Obama's Jeremiah Wright, claims that Alaska is going to be a "refuge state" for Christians in the last days, last days which he sometimes speaks of in the present tense. Palin herself has been captured on video mouthing the inevitable born again idiocies, such as the idea that a recent oil-pipeline deal was "God's Will." She also described the Iraq War as a "task that is from God" and part of a heavenly "Plan." She supports teaching creationism and "Abstinence only" in public schools, opposes abortion even for victims of rape, has denied the science behind global warming and attends a church that seeks to convert Jews and cure homosexuals.
All of which tells you about what you'd expect from a raise-the-base choice like Palin: She's a puffed-up dimwit with primitive religious beliefs who had to be educated as to the fact that the constitution did not exactly envision government executives firing librarians. Judging from the importance progressive critics seem to attach to these revelations, you'd think that these were actually negatives in modern American politics. But Americans like politicians who hate books and see the face of Jesus in every tree stump. They like them stupid and mean and ignorant of the rules. Which is why Palin has only seemed to grow in popularity as more and more of these revelations have come out.
The same goes for the most damning aspect of her biography, her total lack of big-game experience. As governor of Alaska, Palin presides over a state whose entire population is barely the size of Memphis. This kind of thing might matter in a country that actually worried about whether its leader was prepared for his job – But not in America. In America, it takes about 2 weeks in the limelight for the whole country to think you've been around for years. To a certain extent, this is why Obama is getting a pass on the same issue. He's been on TV every day for two years and according to the standards of our instant-ramen culture, that's a lifetime of hands-on experience.
It is worth noting that the same criticisms of Palin also hold true for two other candidates in this race, John McCain and Barack Obama. As politicians, both men are more narrative than substance, with McCain rising to prominence on the back of his bio as a suffering war hero and Obama mostly playing the part of long-lost, future-embracing liberal dreamboat not seen on the national stage since Bobby Kennedy died. If your stomach turns to read how Palin's Kawasaki 704 glasses are flying off the shelves in Middle America, you have to accept that Middle America probably feels the same way when it hears Donatella Versace dedicated her collection to Obama during Milan Fashion Week. Or sees the throwing-panties-onstage-"I love you, Obama!" ritual at the Democratic nominee's town-hall appearances.
So, sure, Barack Obama might be every bit as much as a slick piece of imageering as Sarah Palin. The difference is in what the image represents. The Obama image represents tolerance, intelligence, education, patience with the notion of compromise and negotiation, and a willingness to stare ugly facts right in the face, all qualities we're actually going to need in government if we're going to get out of this huge mess we're in.
Here's what Sarah Palin represents: being a fat fucking pig who pins "Country First" buttons on his man titties and chants "U-S-A! U-S-A!" at the top of his lungs while his kids live off credit cards and Saudis buy up all the mortgages in Kansas
The truly disgusting thing about Sarah Palin isn't that she's totally unqualified, or a religious zealot, or married to a secessionist, or unable to educate her own daughter about sex, or a fake conservative who raised taxes and porked up earmark millions every chance she got. No, the most disgusting thing about her is what she says about us: That you can ram us in the ass for eight solid years, and we'll not only thank you for your trouble, we'll sign you up for eight more years, if only you promise to stroke us in the right spot for few hours around election time.
Democracy doesn't require a whole lot of work of its citizens, but it requires some: It requires taking a good look outside once in awhile, and considering the bad news and what it might mean, and making the occasional tough choice, and soberly taking stock of what your real interests are.
This is a very different thing from shopping, which involves passively letting sitcoms melt your brain all day long and then jumping straight into the TV screen to buy a southern Style Chicken Sandwich because the slob singing "I'm Lovin' It!" during the commercial break looks just like you. The joy of being a consumer is that it doesn't require thought, responsibility, self-awareness or shame: All you have to do is obey the first urge that gurgles up from your stomach. And then obey the next. And the next. And the next.
And when it comes time to vote all you have to do is put your Country First – Just like that lady on TV who reminds you of your cousin. U-S-A, Baby. U-S-A! U-S-A!
A diary of someone who thinks too heavily on the past
so I am clicking through all the new bullitens online since the last time I was on...
and I came across this.
Its one of those chain posts... and I have to say, its sad.
This is what I like to call, The diary of someone who thinks too heavily on the past. > here ya go, let me know what you think
She was
my so called "best friend".
I
stared
at her
long, silky hair,
and wished she was
mine.
But she didnt notice me like that, I
knew it.
After class she
walked up to me and asked
me for the notes she had missed the day
before and
handed them to
her.
She said "thanks"
and gave me a kiss on
the cheek.
I wanna
tell her, I
want her to
know that I don..t
wanna Be just friends, I love her but I..m
just too shy,
and I don..t know
why...
11th Grade
The phone rang.
on
the other end
it was
her.
She was
in tears,
mumbling on
and on
about how her love had broke her heart.
She asked
me to come over
because she didn't want to be alone, so I
did.
As I sat
next to her on
the sofa, I stared at
her soft eyes, wishing
she was mine.
after 2
hours,
a drew barrymore movie,
& 3 bags of
chips, she decided to go
to sleep.
She
looked
at me,
said "thanks" and
gave me a kiss on the
cheek.
I wanna tell her,
I want her to
kno
that I don..t
wanna be just
friends, I love her but
I'm just too shy, and idk wHy
Senior Year
The day before prom she walked to my
locker.
"My date is Sick"
she said; he..s not qonna
go.
well I didnt
have a dAte and
in 7th qrade we
made a promise that if
neither of us had dates we would go
together
just as "best
friends".
So
we did.
Prom niqht
After everything was over I was standing
at her
front
door step.
I stared
at her, She smiled at me
I want her
to be mine,
but she
doesn..t
think of me like that
and I kno it.
then she said "I Had the
best time,
thanks!" and gave me a kiss
on the cheek.
I wanna
tell her,
I want her to kno that I don..t
want to be just
friends, I love her
but I..m just too shy,
and I
don..t kNow why
Graduation Day
a
day passed, then a week, then a month.
before I could blink, it
was graduation day.
I watched as her
perfect
body
floated like an anqel
up on staqe to qet her
diploma.
I wanted her to be mine, but she
didnt notice
me like that, and I knew
it.
Before everyone
went home, she came to me in her smock
and
hat, and
cried as I hugged her.
then she lifted
her
head from my shoulder and said, you..re
my
best friend,
thanks!" and gave
me a kiss on the Cheek.
I wanna tell her, I want her to know that
I
don..t wanna
be just friends, I
love her but I..m just
too shy, and I don..t know why
A Few Years Later
now I sit in the pews of the church.
that
girl is gettinq married
now.
I watched her say "i do" and drive
off
to her new
life, married to another man.
I wanted her
to be mine, but she didn..t see me like
that
and I knew
it.
But before she
Drove away, she came to
me n said you came!" She said.
"thanks!"
and kissed me
on the cheek.
I
wanna tell her, I want
her to
know that i dont wanna be just
friends, I love
her but I..m just too
shy, and i don..t
know why }]|
Years
passed,
I looked
down at the coffin
of a qirl who used to
be my "best friend".
at the service they
read a diary
entry she had wrote in
her hiqh school years.
This is what it
read: I stare at him wishing
he was
mine, but he doesn..t notice
me like that, and I
know it.
i wanna tell him, i want him to
kno
that I
don..t wanna be just friends,
I love him but I'm
just too shy, and I don..t know why.
I wish
he
would tell
me he loved me...I wish I
did too.
I
thought to myself, and I cried
> >
>> > >
>> > >> >REPOST THIS IN THE NEXT 20 MINUTES AND
>> > >SOMEONE WILL TELL YOU THEY
>> > >>LOVE YOU
> >AND WOULD DO ANYTHING FOR YOU... BUT IF
YOU
>> > >BREAK THIS CHAIN YOU
>> > >>WILL HAVE
> >RELATIONSHIP PROBLEMS FOR THE NEXT 13
>> > >YEARS!!
>> > >> > > > > > >
> >SINCE U OPENED THIS
>>SOMETHING GOOD
>> > >>WILL
>> > >HAPPEN TO U AT 11:52 PM
IF YOU'RE A GIRL POST THIS AS "I WANNA TELL HIM"
IF YOU'RE A BOY POST THIS AS "I WANNA TELL HER"
Never keep secrets from the people you loveI WANNA TELL HIM"
IF YOU'RE A BOY POST THIS AS "I WANNA TELL HER"
Never keep secrets from the people you love
I dunno how I feel about this, Cause on one hand, its telling the reader; "Hey, dont sit back and be shy, take chances and be honest. Go for it"
which I'm all in favor of, and believe 100% should be done. for those of you in a friend zone relationship... I say screw it. Tell that chick how you feel, and move on. If she honestly doesnt feel that way, then you know for sure, and your friendship can probably recover. But dont sit there and think that one day she is going to come out and go after you.
But on the other hand, It seems just too... "What If" for me... You cant live your life thinking what if, If you do you'll be a sad, lonely, depressed individual for the rest of your life. All this, well what if I would have just said something... No.
Its over, Its in the past, and you cant change a damn thing about it.
Move on. But learn from your mistake
thats the most important thing that I think isn't even thrown out into this bulliten, its so depressing... and want to know why? the guy that wrote this lived his life thinking "what if".
Then years later, he finds out what would have happened, and he realizes what an idiot he was.
So now what? Nothing truly good comes of that, he just says, I'm an idiot and goes home, and cries himself to sleep that night. Again thinking "What If"
So the point I'm trying to make is this. If you live your life in the past, You're just going to miss more of whats ahead.
And all you have is whats ahead, the moment is fleeting, see what is just coming, and capitalize on that. Learn from your mistakes, but then move on.
Lately I've been doing a lot of thinking, Nothing special, I haven't had any super revelations about my life or direction or anything, But I've been trying my best to be content.
I think my reasons for this are two fold, one being that I want to prove to myself I have the ability to be content, because it seems for my entire life, I've never been so... But I think I can be.
And secondly its so I can keep paying off my debts at my current job. Cause I know if I were to go right now, into another job, I may not be able to pay all of these bills that come in every month.
Right now My family is kinda goin through a rough patch financially, and so they need me to start paying some of the payments for my college loan they took out for me, I had already been paying my own. But the one they took out, with plans on me paying them back when I finished paying my own loan off, is quite a bit more, and I figure if I can pay it, it would be wrong not too.
So if I can keep myself content, and happy where I am, then I can get some bills paid off, and hopefully make it so I can really hit the ground running when the time comes.
I've also been thinking about traveling, I haven't done nearly enough of it for my taste. I love going places and seeing new cultures and just doing things out of my realm of normalcy. I think its a good thing, to have that thirst for adventure and exploration. Its one of the things that keeps me going daily, just imagining one day, when I can have some extra money saved up, maybe some vacation time from wherever I'm employed and can just take the money, and buy a plane ticket to somewhere, somewhere far away, like Australia, or Japan, or even the UK. It would be so cool to get to go to these places for a week or two and really experience their version of the world. I really would like to visit Canada for awhile, maybe move there for a month or two and just try an see how life is up there...
I think about all these things, and I also realize, My life is pretty much a third of the way over! When am I going to be able to do all of these things? and go all these places? I need to do these as soon as possible, tomorrow is never promised. You only have today!
But then I sit, and I think, and my rational mind comes into play, and I realize that yes, Tomorrow is not promised, But this world is built on that promise. This world RUNS on the idea that you have a tomorrow. So even though its a cruel thought that you really, in order to survive, have to conform and live thinking you will have a tomorrow, with the reality that you might not. Think of all the people in the world that work, and plan, and prepare to do these things, But never reach them. Think about that? that's a sad thought, But its the truth.
If you don't live like there is a tomorrow, when tomorrow comes you wont be prepared. And its just the way the world is that the majority of the time tomorrow will come.
So I say Carpe diem, But always remember, whatever you do today will effect what you do tomorrow. But don't live always expecting tomorrow to come.
Currently
listening
:
Only in Amerika
By
(hed) pe
Release date: 2005-02-22
Study Finds Marijuanna NOT linked at all to lung Cancer
Got this from a friend, Its quite old, but very interesting since everyone talks about how Marijuana smoke has to be "Just as Dangerous" as tobacco...
Study Finds No Cancer-Marijuana Connection
By Marc Kaufman Washington Post Staff Writer Friday, May 26, 2006; A03
The largest study of its kind has unexpectedly concluded that smoking marijuana, even regularly and heavily, does not lead to lung cancer.
The new findings "were against our expectations," said Donald Tashkin of the University of California at Los Angeles, a pulmonologist who has studied marijuana for 30 years.
"We hypothesized that there would be a positive association between marijuana use and lung cancer, and that the association would be more positive with heavier use," he said. "What we found instead was no association at all, and even a suggestion of some protective effect."
Federal health and drug enforcement officials have widely used Tashkin's previous work on marijuana to make the case that the drug is dangerous. Tashkin said that while he still believes marijuana is potentially harmful, its cancer-causing effects appear to be of less concern than previously thought.
Earlier work established that marijuana does contain cancer-causing chemicals as potentially harmful as those in tobacco, he said. However, marijuana also contains the chemical THC, which he said may kill aging cells and keep them from becoming cancerous.
Tashkin's study, funded by the National Institutes of Health's National Institute on Drug Abuse, involved 1,200 people in Los Angeles who had lung, neck or head cancer and an additional 1,040 people without cancer matched by age, sex and neighborhood.
They were all asked about their lifetime use of marijuana, tobacco and alcohol. The heaviest marijuana smokers had lighted up more than 22,000 times, while moderately heavy usage was defined as smoking 11,000 to 22,000 marijuana cigarettes. Tashkin found that even the very heavy marijuana smokers showed no increased incidence of the three cancers studied.
"This is the largest case-control study ever done, and everyone had to fill out a very extensive questionnaire about marijuana use," he said. "Bias can creep into any research, but we controlled for as many confounding factors as we could, and so I believe these results have real meaning."
Tashkin's group at the David Geffen School of Medicine at UCLA had hypothesized that marijuana would raise the risk of cancer on the basis of earlier small human studies, lab studies of animals, and the fact that marijuana users inhale more deeply and generally hold smoke in their lungs longer than tobacco smokers -- exposing them to the dangerous chemicals for a longer time. In addition, Tashkin said, previous studies found that marijuana tar has 50 percent higher concentrations of chemicals linked to cancer than tobacco cigarette tar.
While no association between marijuana smoking and cancer was found, the study findings, presented to the American Thoracic Society International Conference this week, did find a 20-fold increase in lung cancer among people who smoked two or more packs of cigarettes a day.
The study was limited to people younger than 60 because those older than that were generally not exposed to marijuana in their youth, when it is most often tried.
tired
content
