Would you believe that I actually have to argue with people sometimes over whether or not I made my own movie? It's funny. Like I actually have to prove to people I was the one who made the video vs Hollywood. I guess in some way I should take that as a compliment, but as a cynical individual, it raises my curiosity.
How the hell could someone be so ignorant as to not read a single credit before or after the film? Take Youtube for example. When I post my videos, they all have the following:
A Blinky Productions ID at the beginning. A Chris .R. Notarile film card. End credits. And a full synopsis box explaining the plot, and some highlighted credits as well as, every now and then, a disclaimer clearly stating I made the movie.
How the heck can someone be so oblivious to all of these credits that it would make them doubt the person who posted the video? I mean you don't need to be a detective to see that the username of the video poster matches the name of the production company.
I boggles me sometimes. And then, the icing on the cake- they argue with me telling me I didn't make something. Like they have the inside scoop. It's laughable sometimes.
The other thing that makes me giggle is when people ask if one of my fan films is an actual installment to an existing franchise. Again I'm flattered, but I just don't get how people can't bother to look a few inches to their right to see the ALL CAPS disclaimer clearly stating what they are watching is a fan film.
I don't know what this says about the intelligence level of the average internet video watcher, but it does make me worry that perhaps we as a people are growing stupider and stoopider by the minute. I'm not looking to start a revolution.... yet, I just wanted to give you something to ponder about.
At long last, METHODIC, the world's first basher movie, finally hits DVD this fall. Though the movie will be available September 1st 2008, you can pre-order your copy now, for only $24.99 plus S/H, to guarrantee it's arrival. The two disc unrated edition includes:
- A making of featurette - Audio commentary w/ Chris .R. Notarile & Brandon Slagle - Outtakes & bloopers - Dr. Pell's deleted scene - The Dollman Chronicles prequel DVD comic book - The original Methodic promo short - An E.V.P. caught on tape - Trailers - The bonus short film "There's a Maniac in My House!!!"
As of now, the film will only be available for purchase from the official Methodic website:
Check out this event: Methodic Screening at BIG APPLE CON
Hosted By: Chris .R. Notarile When: Saturday Jun 07, 2008 at 7:30 PM Where: Pavilion Hotel/The Big Apple Con 33rd st and 7th Ave. New York City, New York|33 10001 United States Description: Chris .R. Notarile
So I was posting around in a few forums I frequent and I've come to the conclusion that I'm a very emotional guy. And by that I mean, if you piss me off, I retaliate in a vicious manner. I guess I've gotten to the point where I just don't care what people think of me and if someone says something I don't like or take offense to, I just snap back at them without a care in the world of how their perception of me might change?
Case in point, my body of work. I'm game for constructive criticism, but if you flat out insult me or my movies, I'll just unload on a person. I used to try and ignore things, and other have told me to not respond at all, but it's just not in my nature. I've always been a hands on kinda guy and if someone crosses me, I'm gonna say something.
So what's the point of this blog? Well aside from me just venting about my issues, I'm looking at this as a how to deal with me guide so that should I ever snap at you, it won't come as such a shock. Then again, hopefully you will know me well enough to know how to speak to me without saying something insulting or stupid.
Again, don't mind me, I'm just getting things off my chest. So just move along. As you were.
So I just got back from NYC Comic Con yesterday and yes, it was a very interesting weekend. I met a lot of people and did a lot of things, so let me break it down for you in days.
Friday: I came dressed as the Dollman. There wasn't too much action going on Friday and I didn't to break out the spandex quite yet, so I skulked around the show as everyone's favorite face smasher. The turn out was mediocre since people weren't let in til 3pm. Being a professional creator, I got to come in early and it was a nice flow. I met up with Fear.net and the Dollman got a few interviews. I managed to also make friends with a few people who had notable connections to big name distributors and of course I gave them dvd copies of Methodic. I'm keeping my fingers crossed on who bites. I was also interviewed on Fox news which was fun and as always, freaked the hell out of all the convention goers. After the show, I went home to crash, but Niki had to quickly film something for someone. She's also the official spokes model for Captain Action and spent all day promoting the new comic whereas I basically walked like 5 miles around during show. So needless to say, we were both pretty beat when we got back and just passed out.
Saturday: We got to the show around 10:30 and it was PACKED! People lined the floors from wall to wall. It was madness. I had suited up as the ever trusty Blue Beetle and hit the floors. Now I don't like tooting my own horn, but damn was I entertaining. And man do people love the beetle. I also got to meet up with a fan of mine by the name of Ralph who seems to be a promising computer animator that I intend to work with someday soon. Around 3:00, I hit the downstairs area to take part in the Fan Films panel. Clive Young had written a book concerning fan films and hey, what do you know, I'm in it. I'm also on the cover too. The panel was pretty fun, I tried to not bore the audience as much as possible by being as humorously informative as possible, but some of the other panelists who will remain nameless were not so successful. I was joined by my good friend, Fanboy Will of Fanboy Theatre and fan film urban legend, Dan Poole, who once upon a time, put on a Spiderman costume and like an idiot with a death wish, swung from building to building on a rope with no safety net, all for the sake of making the 1992 fan film, The Green Goblin's Last Stand. Oh and please make no mistake, I totally respect Dan and his efforts, but I still think he's a friggin idiot for doing what he did as unsafely as he did it. That shit takes balls. Anyhoo, we did the panel, which had a great turn out, then I went back upstairs where I had a little wardrobe malfunction. Let's just say it involved a prop bottle of Jack Daniels, a trash can and my crotch ripping open at the seam. It was horrible. At that point I IMMEDIATELY returned to the Captain Action table where Niki was stationed and I changed wardrobe. And yes, it was for the better. After that, the convention began to sort of die down and it was time to get on out. Later that night, Niki, myself and company went to release party for the new Flash Gordon comic book. But we had to leave early because well, we were friggin exhausted from running around all day.... again.
Sunday: So with my Blue Beetle costume out of commission and my lack of desire to wear my spandex, the Dollman made his second appearance at the convention. Sunday was fun because it wasn't too packed but it wasn't too empty. I even ran into these two kids, probably 4 and 6 and they were not scared of me. Sledgehammer and all, they ran up to me and hugged me and one kid said he loved me. Go figure. I have a personal policy I follow which I mentioned back in my Halloween blog, I refuse to scare kids under the age of 10 unless they provoke me. So needless to say, these kids were not on my shit list and it was nice. I also made some great connections regardling Captain Action that day. I recently co-wrote a pilot for a Captain Action lampoon comedy and thanks to some potential connections I made, it might get made. We'll see. Everything was going pretty smoothley on Sunday right up until I met Dan Didio. My god, do I hate that prick. I don't care what anyone says, it's not fair to mess around with fan's hope. I asked him how long the Blue Beetle had left and he told me "Not long." When I asked him why he felt it nessesary to kill Ted Kord, again, he said "We already have a Blue Beetle." I don't know about you but the way he spoke to me made me want to take my sledgehammer and smash in his knee caps. It's rude to to bring back a character, especially for me who has spent the last 3 years campaigning for his return, and then kill him AGAIN! What the hell. Why bring him back in the first place if you're only going to kill him again? For sales? To piss off fans? It's just rude. After that huge upset in my day, I kind of took it easy and just wandered around till the show ended. I met up with Amanda Conner and Jimmy Palmiotti as well as a few other artists, and then when they turned off the show lights and began striking the floor, Niki and I packed up and went home.
All in all, it was a great show, but that pompus attitude from Didio really put me in a bad mood. It almost makes me wonder why I'm a fan in the first place if I'm not repected by the very people I buy my comics from? I'm not sure how to end this one, so I will.
Fame and what people deem to be fame is a very funny subject. There is that old term of having your 15 minutes in the spotlight. After that, the world forgets about you. The lengths people go through to stay in that spotlight and drag out those 15 minutes is just insane. But this is not a social commentary on popstars, one hit wonders or celeb tours of rehab, this is different. This is a commentary about what we as regular people do to get famous. Or more specifically, how the internet has become a soapbox and given voice to virtually everyone with a modem.
There are a couple of things I want to talk about. The first of them being internet movie reviewers. As I’m sure most of you might immediately assume that I’m merely just complaining about a bad review I might have gotten about one of my films. I assure you that’s DEFINITELY not the case. This subject was actually brought to my attention by someone else’s attempt at making a film and I just basically sat back as a spectator.
When you watch a person’s film you immediately walk away with an oppinion of it whether it be positive or negative, but what makes your oppinion so important that you can actually effect the outcome of other people wanting to see that very movie? Is it because you are a seasoned reviewer/movie critic? Are you a film and tv professor? Are you yourself a fellow filmmaker and can provide an indepth look into how the movie was made? Or perhaps are you just an oppinionated person with a little too much time on your hands and so you posted your thoughts and oppinions (positive or negative) in a forum.
What I’m getting at is it’s funny how we as a culture rely so heavily on the oppinions of others rather than creating one for ourselves. We would much rather be told what’s hot and what’s not than actually step outside comfort of our own homes and sample things for ourselves. Call me old fashioned, but I do enjoy being pleasantly suprised once and a while when I go see a movie that got bad reviews and ultimately end up liking it. The same goes for critically acclaimed movies that I end up loathing knowing full well their reviews were totally bought and bogus. (Those movies of course will remain nameless as I’m not up for debating right now)
Now I brought up the whole oppinion thing so I could mention this: With the help of the internet, bascially anyone with an oppinion can tell us what to like or dislike, regardless of how valid their oppinion might be. That being said, it boggles me how much someone goes through to remain "correct" on the internet. The level of animosity between two regular people arguing anonymously on the internet is ridiculous. In the long run, who are you anyway? You’re just a screenname, occasionally you may have a link to a personal profile or email address, but for the most part, you’re just a random selection of letters, numbers and nothing more. Why is your oppinion so damned important that you feel the need to hate anyone who may dissagree with you?
This sort of behavior I don’t get, though I can only guess it’s a subconscious version wanting your 15 minutes of fame. And please, feel free to test my theory out. Log onto to any forum where there might be a topic of debate and look for the users who continually argue. Follow their conversations as they escalate and see how long it takes before their debates turn into blatant insults and attacks. It’s as if they were, god forbid, ever proven wrong or change their views on a topic they might be viewed as less important as they originally thought themselves out to be. By the way, these types of people normally have a large number of posts to their credit. And when I say large, I mean they have well over 1,000 posts in a forum they have only been a member of for a short time. I’m a member of OHMB.NET since 2004 and I don’t think I even broke 300 posts.
The second topic I wanted to touch upon is taking things beyond the level of entertainment. Recently, I received an email from a fan of mine who got into a physical confrontation with another person who was bad mouthing me and or my films. The confrontation was so bad the cops were called. Now I don’t know what exactly happened nor was I aware until he told me. But the bottom line is, not only do I not condone kicking a person’s ass for bad mouthing someone you have never met and are just a fan of their work, but I don’t condone believing in something so much it would make you want to act that way in the first place. For Christ’s sake, I’m a filmmaker, an entertainer. I’m not a martyr, I’m not a religion. And I definitely don’t want people thinking that way either. What I do is fun. It’s work, but it’s fun work. There is absolutely no need to get into a fight with someone who doesn’t like me, regardless of what they say. That’s how wars are started, that’s how religions and religious crusades are started: "My god is better than you’re god and if you disagree with me, I’ll kick your ass."
Look, I’m not trying to compare myself to god or anything of that nature. But I seriously don’t want people believing in me the way suicide bombers believe in getting 72 virgins in the afterlife. I just want people to be able to distinguish the difference between an intelligent oppinion of something (say a movie for example) and a retard with a big mouth. Cause in the end, as funny as it may be to watch them squirm, there is no good that will ever come from beating a retard’s ass.
I just felt it pertinent to share with you a few key ideals I live my live by. I hope you enjoy them as much as I do.
1. There are no stupid questions, just stupid people.
2. If the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again, expecting a different outcome each time, then why are you here bothering when you should be locked up?
3. If you're stupid, think you might be stupid, or have been told you're stupid, I already hate you.
4. Gravity is a cruel and harsh misstress.
5. If you're green you grow. When you're ripe you rott. Stay green forever.
6. Reality TV is fattening. Consume in moderation.
7. Aim for perfection, achieve greatness. Aim for greatness, achieve medicrity. Aim for mediocrity, achieve crap. And if you're aiming for crap, don't bother aiming at all.
8. If killing stupid people was legal, the world would be a smarter place.
9. If you smoke it, you deserve everything you get out of it.
10. Never do anything unless you are prepared to handle any and all consequences from your actions.
11. When your personal life over shadows your professional life, you fucked up somewhere along the line.
12. What you won't do, someone else will for cheaper.
13. Hard work is for chumps. Slacking off is for doochebags.
14. If you want something done right, do it yourself. If you want everything done right, clone yourself.
15. If I said something that offended you, it means you're not a smart person with a narrow perspective.
16. Starbucks is the devil's work.
17. Organized religion is evil.
18. Haunted houses are haunted for damn good reasons. So don't go into them.
19. If a maniac murdered a bunch of people, don't throw a sex/drugs/booze party in the same place on the anniversary of that massacre. It's in bad taste.
20. Homeless people are homeless for a reason. Don't give them your money. If they really wanted it, they'd get off their lazy homeless ass and kill you for it.
So I don't know if you're aware of this or not, but I'm a filmmaker and I am for hire. The way that works is you contact me, tell me you have a project, ask me if I want to shoot it, assure me you have a budget and I come out and get the job done and then you pay me. Simple as that. But sometimes that just doesn't connect with people.
About once or twice a month, I get an email from someone telling me how they love my work and how they want to work with me. They tell me how they love my style and boast about their project and how it's something I must do with them. So naturally I get excited. I say awesome, let's do it.
My first question after I get excited is as always "Do you have a budget?" And that's when everything usually goes south of the border. I get met with people not sure what I mean. Sometimes they assume that I would be the one providing the budget. Why? I ask you. Why the hell would I want to spend money I don't have on making your project come to life when I can spend that money on.... I don't know, MY OWN PROJECTS? It really pisses me off actually and in a way is kind of rude. I don't know these people from Adams or apple and immediately they think I not only have the cash, but I want to make their dreams come true. That's insulting really.
Another common problem I get stuck with is "Oh, I'm only umpteen and have no money. I was thinking of paying you like 100 bucks to shoot my feature on my friend's home video camera just to cut costs." Really? What goes through your head when you say these words? Seriously? This is my bread and butter and you're basically asking me to work for you for free? To what, build my resume? I am not a film student. I do not need the credit or the experience. How the hell do you expect me to take you serious if you don't have your shit together let alone a humble fee for basically renting me for X amount of days it takes to shoot your project. If you think I'm so amazing and love my work so much, wouldn't you think I deserve to treated as professionally as possible?
The final slap in the face is the "Yeah we figured we'd be doing you a favor by letting you work on our project for nothing." This is kind of a mix between the first two examples but not masked with innocent ignorance. This is just being an up front dick about it.
And you know what's funny? Every now and then I get angry letters from people. They get pissed that I won't make their project free of charge? Like it boggles their minds that I, a starving artist actually needs to eat? How dare I. So there you have it, if you ever decide to hire me to make your super awesome amazing project, just remember what my dad always said "Fuck you, pay me." This is a business not a game.
