Random Thoughts Volume 3!
Current mood: inquisitive

When you flush a toilet that is directly on the Equator, which way does the water flow?

Song lyric that needs to be retired: "The more things change, the more things stay the same". And all variations thereof.

Why do so many celebrities get DUIs? Can't they afford a limo or even a cab? Don't they usually travel with entourages and hangers-on that could get behind the wheel for them once in a while?

What is the real problem Republicans have with believing in global warming? Is it all because of Al Gore that they refuse to recognize global warming?

In comic strips, the person on the left always speaks first.

Please don't humor me with your explanations of how well-behaved your pit bull is around your small children. You only hear about a pit-bull mauling a little kid to death about every single month! So I've decided it is only common sense to not own one. Duh!

Has anyone really figured out what exactly Tila Tequila's main profession is?

You know what the best weight-loss diet around has to be? The crack diet. Have you ever seen an obese crackhead? I rest my case.

Let's face it. Tupac and Biggie are the greatest rappers ever because they're DEAD. Did they really stand out THAT much from the rest of the pack when they were alive?

A new theory: Has anyone considered the possibility that Norton, McAfee and all the rest of the antivirus and firewall protection companies may be the ones inventing all of the new computer viruses that continually seem to pop up?

My economic stimulus package proposal: Bring every single person back home from Iraq immediately. That way the government will not have to spend another dime over there, and there will be thousands of troops backs home buying things here in this country! Maybe a bunch of them will even decide to buy houses and help the real estate market slump! Man, I should have been a politician!

I propose they start a Steroid User & Compulsive Gambler Sports Hall of Fame to eliminate any more debate on who is and who isn't worthy of being honored.

So if you do not currently have small children, please do not even attempt trying to tell me how "tired" or "busy" you are!

I'd venture to say that 1 in every 3 Hollywood films made since 1985 contain the song "Walking On Sunshine".

Has Oprah EVER handed out money, donations or prizes anonymously, or must there always be a press release and cameras present?

I just realized that the wifey and I have never had a couples picture taken on the beach with sea oats. Every couple gets their picture taken on the beach with sea oats. Could this mean we're not really married then, because we never did the "engagement sea oats pose"? Somebody get some sea oats at once!

Damn those gay guys! They had to ruin it for the rest of us! Never will I be able to sport a mustache and short shorts…..

Has anybody realized how grossly unfair it is that you have to be a Junior or an offspring of a past or present NASCAR driver in order to be a NASCAR driver yourself?

Phrase that needs to be retired: "If you don't like the weather in (insert state or region here), wait around a while, it will change". The weather in your particular area is not unique, everybody everywhere says that!

5:43 PM - 3 Comments - 1 Kudos - Add Comment

Talented DJs?
Current mood: annoyed

Upon surfing around this wonderful My Space land, reading other people's rants and raves, I realized how bothered I am by a particular item of pop culture…..

When did club DJs become celebrities? Why are some achieving a sort of rock star status?

What tipped me over the edge, was a blog mentioning "all the talented DJs in our local scene". Talented DJs? Sounds like an oxymoron to me!

Perhaps being a musician skews my perspective on this whole issue. But let me admit that at weddings in the past, I have both played a DJ and performed in a live band. And guess which one took the most time, effort, agility, skill and talent?

What are these club DJs doing that is so special? With today's technology, it seems that any idiot can be a DJ with a PC, iTunes and a microphone! To me, there is nothing very creative or artistic about it. And talk about completely selling out and pandering to the club crowd, spinning all the latest and greatest trendy dance hits to their raving delights!

I am mostly outraged that these DJs are stealing the limelight away from so many of the struggling, but extremely talented musicians out there. Many of them I count as personal friends of mine. While they struggle to keep their 1982 Ford Econolines running from town to town, eating Ramen Noodles and peanut butter, "DJ Scott" is touring in style with several corporate sponsorships! Where is the justice in this world?

And here's another thought for all those aspiring DJs out there: Instead of taking all the time to learn how to twist knobs and faders, scratch and press buttons, why not take the time to learn how to play a REAL INSTRUMENT? I speak from experience, that it would likely be much more personally satisfying and rewarding at the end of the day. And then, you could even create your own original music, and not have to mix other people's crap together! What a concept!

I really wish I could understand this whole "scene". Maybe I should go undercover as a DJ? I could spike my hair up, get a piercing and an extremely tight print t-shirt, and wave my hands in the air as I spin shitty, electronic, computerized music! Then I'd get to go home with the hottest chicks in the club that night!

Yes, I am being sarcastic! But this isn't:

CLUB DJs ARE NOT ROCK STARS!

Okay I am done now. Thanks for reading. Please weigh in with your thoughts.

Brandon

Currently listening : Retriever By Ron Sexsmith Release date: 06 April, 2004

4:05 PM - 7 Comments - 5 Kudos - Add Comment

Random Thoughts Volume 2!
Current mood: confused

Ahhh, yes....some more random thoughts from that twisted head of mine. I encourage you to weigh in with your opinions, so that it may enlighten me.......

Read on............

Since work dress codes are getting more and more casual all the time, will we all be able to wear t-shirts and jeans to work one day? What's with this suit and tie garbage? Why must we all eventually conform to what the generation before us wore?

Why do only white people go camping?

With digital cameras, the next generation will never know what it means to take their "film" into Wal-Mart to get "developed".

I happened to like Sammy Hagar singing for Van Halen. So sue me.

Phrase that should be outlawed: "Working hard or hardly working?"

Is the baseball that Hank Aaron hit as his 755th homerun not worth a dime now?

When a female changes her My Space status from "Single" to "In A Relationship", all the old slutty pictures mysteriously disappear.

"Irregardless" is not a real word. It is a double negative, and the correct word to be used would be "regardless". Google it if you don't believe me.

Why do almost all hip-hop singles and videos and have to be "featuring" somebody else?

Please do not think you are original or unique by taking the first letter of the city you live in, and making it a catchphrase like "P-Town". Everybody does that everywhere, which makes it hard to distinguish if "P" stands for Philadelphia, Phoenix, Pittsburgh, Portland or Portsmouth.

How can MTV still have the VMA's, when they don't even play music videos anymore? We never even get to see the videos that are nominated! This is ridiculous! What's next? Comedy Central is going to start showing old war movies?

If I wasn't already taken, I'd seriously consider stalking Jessica Alba.

Why do some people say "on tomorrow" and not just "tomorrow"? I'm pretty sure it is improper grammar, and you're just making more work for yourself!

If we ever have an entirely government-run health care system, will going to the doctor be just like going to the DMV?

Has any movie made from an old TV show ever been worth a shit?

The term "indie" is the new term for "alternative". Curiously, both terms have been used to describe hugely successful mainstream bands on major labels selling millions of records.

I'm all for illegal Mexican immigrants. Because they work all the jobs that none of the rest of us seem to want to do. And somebody's got to do it, right?

I haven't involved myself in Texas Hold 'Em or Fantasy Football, because I am waiting for the next stupid ass fad!

Can anyone really tell the difference between digital phone service and analog phone service?

When somebody speaks of the band "The Who", please stop saying "who?" Yeah, everybody already realized that irony about 40 years ago.

Why do guys have nipples?

Currently listening : Kyle Vincent By Kyle Vincent Release date: 22 April, 1997

6:20 PM - 6 Comments - 5 Kudos - Add Comment

Wanna CD? Click Here!

Hey Kiddies!
If you dig what you're hearing, you can purchase my 18-song CD compilation, "Knowhitz" for the incredibly cheap price of 5 bucks at these fine independent music online stores:

www.NotLame.com

www.KoolKatMusik.com

Each CD you purchase means the world to me. Actually it means I can buy a case of Ramen Noodles. Which really means I won't go hungry for at least another week.......
Thanks for listening!
Cheers,
Brandon

7:51 PM - 1 Comments - 2 Kudos - Add Comment