[First published in City Weekly magazine September 2007]
I have, for quite some time, found the practice of urinating on floors in kitchens to be simply unacceptable. As a policy it has cost me housemates. It has ended dinner parties prematurely. This hardline stance has served me well, with equally high levels of self-respect and kitchen hygiene. Three weeks ago, this all changed. Three weeks ago, Waldon arrived.
Waldon is a West Highland white terrier. Our first child. My only son. A creature so adorable, I am moved to invent the word 'gorgeousity' to label what he brings to his every activity. Even as I write this, he is asleep on my feet, tuckered out after a long and very important wrestle with an empty toilet roll. I am the world's most doting and overprotective father and Waldon has softened my resolve.
When Waldon relives himself on the floor in the kitchen, it's almost endearing. I'm not angry. I just roll with it. This has led me to the disturbing conclusion that if you are cute enough, I will pretty much let you urinate on my floor. If Anne Margaret circa Viva Las Vegas, a 1967 Dianna Rigg or a 2007 Jennifer Hawkins were to tinkle near my teacups, I would probably let them, before distracting them with a toy while I fetched some paper towel. This is a significant thing to learn about oneself.
I have also learned in the last three weeks that there is a certain order to the world. While human beings are above puppies on the food chain, slippers are not. They are fair game and apparently delicious. I was under the mistaken impression that slippers were designed almost exclusively for walking across frosty morning tiles to put the kettle on. I had no idea they were a nutritious meal. Waldon has taught me so much.
Waldon's best friend is a toy called Pukeko, a plush toy replica of a bird common to New Zealand. I picked it up at Auckland airport in what has turned out to be an insightful gift-buying manoeuvre. According to a Kiwi friend of mine (who is somewhat of an expert in mating) the Pukeko participates in one of the more confused breeding rituals on the planet. Pukeko are seldom sure of gender or persuasion, and mate once a year in a random, moonlit sexual frenzy in a muddy field. It's like Woodstock for birds, without the unnecessary distractions of music and illicit drugs. The other similarity being the persistent presence of documentary filmmakers. En masse, the Pukeko go hell for feather with whatever they can lay their claws on, male or female, with little idea of what they are doing, who they are doing it to or why. Sometimes, as random as lightning, a baby will happen. (For many, this should actually sound quite familiar.)
It was therefore strangely appropriate when a ten-week-old Waldon had his wicked way with the Pukeko. It was clumsy, but enthusiastic. I am unsure if it was a genuine attempt to mate or simply an exercise of control to establish a power dynamic. (For many, this should sound even more familiar). I have no idea what the offspring will be like, but given their parents, they will probably be cute, cuddly and relieve themselves on my kitchen floor.
Impractical Jokes - Brisbane Powerhouse - October 16-21
Category: Life
Hello Myspace Friends
This is a gratuitous plug for a show I am doing in Brisbane next month. It is my show from the Melbourne Comedy Festival. If you live in Brisbane, please come along and see it. If you know some people who might want to come, feel free to let them know.
After selling out his solo run at the Soho Theatre on London's West End and packing houses at the Edinburgh Fringe Festival, Melbourne Comedy Festival and London's Comedy Store, Charlie Pickering brings his latest show to Brisbane.
In 1986 Charlie Pickering's Dad was pushed into a pool by his best friend. What followed was 10 years of payback involving three toilets, a poodle, daffodils and the State Emergency Service. When maturity is the first casualty of war, things tend to escalate.
Charlie is a natural story-teller. His 2006 Melbourne Comedy Festival show, Auto, was a collection of true stories from adolescence that received a Barry Award Nomination for Most Outstanding Show. From there it played to packed houses at the New Zealand International Comedy Festival and Edinburgh Fringe, earning five star reviews, an ever-growing legion of international fans and a nomination for Best International Act (NZ).
Following his Edinburgh success, Charlie was booked to play legendary London Comedy Store, and performed a sold out solo run at the Soho Theatre on London's West End. He then made his UK TV debut on Paramount TV's Comedy Store Live.
"Charming company and a natural raconteur" The Scotsman
"You won't be disappointed" The Independent (UK)
"Pickering's analysis is more than witty, it's side-shakingly funny" The Age
My humble apologies, 1611 Friends.
Category: MySpace
Hello all. Or should I say hello all of you who have remained at Charlie Pickering Myspace HQ, despite a lack of effort, guidance and contact from your humble host.
I know I haven't given even suggested a theme for this month. Some of you have shown great initiative and suggested your own themes. This is to be applauded. And, as it turns out, embraced.
Before I launch the exciting new month, one that will not only be fun, but challenge much of what you currently know about calendars.
But first an explanation of my absence. I have, in the past three weeks, become a father. I returned from a three week tour with Danny Bhoy and a very special little man came into my life. His name is Waldon. His full name is W. G. Snuffy Waldon. Some of you will know why that is a great name. It is a policy of my wife and I not to explain his name. There are those who know and those who don't.
Waldon is currently a 12 week old West Highland White Terrier. While his age may change, I feel confident he will remain a west highland white terrier.
Here is a photo of Waldon with his best friend, Pukeko.
As a result of a combination of Waldon's inability to cook, let himself outside to wee or stop being the most adorable time-wasting attention seeker, I have literally spent every spare minute focusing on him. This is the first time I have stopped at my computer for long enough to say hello.
He still wees inside and takes up a lot of time, but I have decided that enough is enough and I really should make myself get somethings done.
And so, with an apology for my neglect and a new resolve for the future, I welcome you all to: Septober - Show us your pets month!
From now until the end of October (or possibly halfway through October, you know, when Octember starts) I would like to see people's profile photos be pictures of their pets. They can be goldfish, dogs, llamas. Whatever you have and love. If you don;t have a pet, you have until the end of Septober to go to the lost dogs' home and get one. Bring those photos on. I want to see some cute bitches [and other genders and animals]! Word!
Once again, just message me to let me know that your photo has changed, and I will hopefully have the cutest top friends list ever before too long.
SOme things to add:
1. I have not become an annoying pet person. I will not just start posting videos of cats falling into water etc. I will remain fairly normal. 2. That said, later this week I will be posting a full blog about Waldon 3. I finally have a CD of my show Auto. It will be available online soon. I will let you know when. 4. I will, in the next few days, be relaunching www.charliepickering.com, stay tuned. 5. I have a new Radio show. It is on 6-8 Saturday mornings on Triple M in Melbourne and Brisbane. Please feel free to tune in. I am doing it with 2 of my best friends in the world, Justin Hamilton and Terri Psiakis. The show is called TOAST. 6. Thanks for your patience, I hope we can all still be friends.
[First published on Rove Daily website www.rovedaily.com.au]
No matter how many celebrity dancing extravaganzas or home renovation miracles the networks can create, nothing whets our primitive appetites like hard hitting police drama. We are captivated by crime, mesmerised by manslaughter and hooked on homicide. But surely now, we have enough of these shows.
Don't get me wrong. I love a world where television executives heard peoples cries for 'more varieties of Law and Order' and gladly obliged. There's the original one, with the sadly departed dad from Dirty Dancing. There's the condescending egotistical maniac one, reminding us that 'yes, criminals are idiots!' There's the slightly off-putting "rapey" one, where Ice-T has made the baffling transition from Cop Killer to Cop Thriller, just by selling out. Or is it buying in? I can never tell.
I can't wait to see what they make next. 'Diet Law and Order', with more law and less order. It's light on the paperwork so you can slam it down fast. If my calculations are correct, they will soon be making so many versions of Law and Order that they will need to start the 'Law and Order Channel' featuring such hits as the musical 'Law and Order- Unplugged', the comedy 'Dude, where's my Law and Order' and the movie length 'I still know what you did last Law and Order'.
On the other side of the coin, CSI is opening up franchises in more cities than Starbucks. Not only that, but they continue to invent crime solving technology that won't exist for another hundred years. I'm sure there are a lot of police detectives sitting at home watching and wishing they had a magical crime solving computer that could read fingerprints from a single thread of cotton. The world truly would be a safer place. If only Hollywood would share this technology with the everyone else.
Then there's Numbers. The remarkable show that pretends to use maths to solve crimes, in an attempt to make its audience feel smart enough to use maths. A formula that adds up to a staggering amount of bullshit and makes me wish that guy was still making Northern Exposure. Follow that with Medium, whose name indicates the scale of it's appeal, Supernatural which is neither super nor natural, and NCIS which proves than an anagram really can be used to sell anything. The bottom line is what amounts to a plague of police dramas.
And Australia is not to be outdone. No sooner had the crime riddled Mount Thomas been wiped off the map, than a "new breed" of remarkably similar crime fighting drama appeared.
Channel Nine have unleased Sea Patrol, widely touted as the largest, most expensive production in Australian television history. Having seen the show once, I wouldn't be surprised if there were more people working on catering for the cast and crew than there were currently patrolling our coastal waters.
Then there is the forthcoming City Homicide, the name reminding us that this is nothing like Blue Healers. Blue Healers was in the country. This is CITY Homicide. See? Different.
I have a little bit of a theory as to how we can solve some problems and make the world a better place. Problem one: there are too many cop shows on television. In fact there are more cops on TV than there are on the streets. Problem two: our police force is undermanned, overworked and not making it's recruitment quotas. Solution: we train actors to be cops, put them on the streets and tell them it's a reality tv show. In fact, let's make it a reality tv show. We could call it 'When bad actors go good'. And with the revenue we make from advertising, we can buy one of those CSI computers to solve crimes for us.
The response to hands on hips month was literally overwhelming. Thank you to everyone who participated. I am sorry to those who did participate but didn't sneak into the top friends. This was largely due to what became an administrative nightmare so time-consuming that it threatened my relationship and careers.
Let me explain. The joy of a themed months, is that everyone can be a part of it and it builds a sense of community so lacking in the modern world (and, ironically, in online communities). The downside of the themed month is that it is actually hard to sift through some 1400 friends trying to spot which ones have their hands on their hips. Trust me, it was MANY HOURS and I only got the job half done.
So what I have decided is that people's photos have to be easily spotted as participating on the theme. I figured that if everyone were holding a large piece of cardboard with something written thickly in black marker, I could spot that easily. And so I'm very proud to announce that August is:
'SUBTERRANEAN HOMESICK BLUES MONTH '
This is the legendary film clip to the legendary song 'Subterranean Homesick Blues' by the legendary Bob Dylan. It is possibly the most recognisable film clip in the world (with the possibly exception of 'You can't touch this' by MC Hammer or 'Never Gonna Give You Up' by Rick Astley).
My goal is to have a group of top friends with identical cards to those that Bob Dylan flicks through in the clip. If possible, I would like to have no double-ups. So everybody can't just hold up 'Basement' and expect to be number one friend. Pick something further into the song or at leats obscure, and your chances are pretty good.
You have seven days to get your photos up. On the 8th of August, I will update the top friends.
In the meantime, my top friends has been pulled back to 4. This is headed up by Sharon in position number one who showed massive initiative and is already into the spirit of Subterranean homesick blues month.
After August the 8th, we ay re-evaluate where we are at and possibly call for some new messages on cards. But until then, my goal is to have the film-clip lived out in still shots of all my myspace friends.
Godspeed, 1490 friends. Make me, and the legendary Bob Dylan proud. Until the 8th I shall remain in the basement, mixing up the medicine.
FRIENDSHIP EDICT: BRACE YOURSELVES FOR JULY, 1300 FRIENDS!
Ok (Or as they say in the ghetto 'O 2 DA K') 1300 friends! Lots to get through, so let's not fart about like some kind of rudderless dirigible farting machine!
But I digress.
A WORD ABOUT THE 40 There is a lot of talk around myspace about the expansion of the maximum top friends cache from 24 to 40. Hmmm….This puts a lot of pressure on Charlie Pickering Friendship Headquarters to include more top friends. But for the time, I will resist. Why? Tradition.
I have been on mysapce since 1973. Back then you had only one top friend ore 'besty' as we called them. But as people got more friends and Al Gore invented the internet, the need for greater friendship circles increased and so we expanded to 2. Then 3. Then 8. Then back to 4, on account of the plague. Then 8 again on account of unprotected drunken sex. Then 16. Then 24.
For now, I am happy with 24. If July kicks off in a big way (and I think it will!....read on for more info about JULY!) the we may temporarily expand to 40. Wait and see.
Now to the OUTS AND INS!
THE OUT LIST A bunch of people. All evil. You know who you are. In particular, Barack Obama a ack of spunk in the first half of June. Pick up your act Barack! No president of mine will lack spunk! I BELIEVE IN YOU! But I believed in the Easter Bunny, Santa Clause and the Longevity of 'The Catch Up', so who am I to judge?
THE IN LIST
The Dalai Llama is back in the top 24! How's that for Karma! As they say, 'what goes around BUYS a round'! (By they I mean morons!) Just want to say Dalai, your show ROCKED!! Obviously, I loved the news stuff. "This should be a century of discourse" was fully wicked! But the old classics really had me vibing! When you riffed out on 'Compassion' for like fifteen minutes I was like 'holy shitballs, this guys so full of wisdom I'm going to shit my pants!' I didn't think it could get any better. But then when Pope Benedict and Eddie Vedder came out to jam on your cover of Subterranean Homesick Blues, I was like 'get fucked. You are the best Dalai Llama EVER!'. Take that China!
FOTC: Great new show guys! Still waiting for my callback audition, but you've got the number. If you haven't seen it check out the HBO website or download it from a pirate! Video pirate that is!
MYKA Thanks for an AMAZING weekend. And they said Freddy Mercury was dead!...Of AIDS…so tragic….Rock!
RICHARD WILKINS For holding down the fort while Karl Stefanovic is over at the Paker/Whatshername wedding of the millennium. Good work, you spaz!
WARLORDS OF PES For being the only Billionnaire Pricks form Outter Space I know. And particularly for being the only ones I know to dedicate a song to the beatification of Padre Pio. Word!
ARISOTLE For redefining the history of thought as a concept. Philosophy is richer for your substantial contriution. You embraced the whole circle of knowledge of your time. Many of them are lost; of those that remain the most important are the "Organon," or "Logic," "Rhetoric," "Poetics" and "Meteorology." Your Organon or Logic is his complete development of formal reasoning, and is the basis and nearly the whole substance of syllogistic or scholastic logic. You go girl!
HARVEY KEITEL Pretty much the same reasons as aristotle.
NOW, THE BIG NEWS!!!!
SPECIA ANNOUNCEMENT!!!!! Now, for the month of July something special is happening to my top 24 fiends. I am hereby happy to announce that July is 'HANDS ON HIPS MONTH' at Charlie Pickering Myspace Friend Headquarters.
For the month of July, if you take a photo with your hands on your hips and have it as your Myspace default image, you will AUTOMATICALLY go into my top 24. (By 'automatically' I mean send me a message and let me know and if I like the picture then BAM! As if by magic!) (By 'magic' I mean the miraculous work of our lord Jesus Christ) (By 'our lord Jesus Christ' I mean me, or a deity of your choice)
But in the words of me, let's not get bogged down in detail! This is meant to be exciting! July is 'HANDS ON HIPS MONTH'.
This is my friend Sam Bowring with his hands on his hips!
Here is my other friend Chris Wainhouse with his hands on his hips!
See, everyone's doing it!
You can also help others to be a part of 'HANDS ON HIPS MONTH' . If you have a myspace friend who has a photo with their hands on their hips, tell them join in the fun. It could be literally minutes of enjoyment for everybody in the entire world!
SUMMARY That's about all for now. Don't forget to subscribe to the blog. It is rad.
Also, I have just finished mastering a cd of AUTO. It will be available soon. I will let you know more when it's ready..
This week, for the first time in my life, I saw my father cry.
I'm twenty-nine and I have seen my father live through a lot of trying events without a single tear. When I was six, I pinched his backside with a pair of pliers so hard he got airborne. Together we have seen more Rocky sequels and excruciating Essendon one point preliminary final losses than anyone should have to endure. Through it all, his stiff upper lip has accompanied dry eyes and a stoic nose. Dad held out on crying just long enough for me to believe he was invincible, and cried just soon enough for me to love that he isn't.
This week our dog Max died and my dad lost his best friend. My mother lost hers too.
Every morning for fifteen years, Max fetched the paper and took it upstairs to Mum. He would leap onto the bed, drop the paper, offer a brisk morning kiss and run away. He would return soon after with a pair of slippers in his mouth. Once these were in position, he would climb all over the paper, signifying that news time was over and the day needed doing. Every morning for fifteen years, Max was the start to her day, and on a good morning he would sneak the last of her tea.
'Lollies' is derived from 'lolly lumps' which was Pickering rhyming slang for 'jumps'. My sister Suzie used to yell 'lollies' and without hesitation Max would leap into her waiting arms. He would then growl and wriggle because he was slightly uncomfortable and Suzie would put him down. She would then yell 'lollies' again and he would immediately leap back.
Max gave my sister the kind of love that to call unconditional would be too easy. It was a love that understands that you do things for the people that are important to you. Those things aren't always easy or what you want to do, but you do them because what you get back is worth all the love you can give. I'm pretty sure that the moment Suzie recognised it in a man she knew she'd met her husband.
When we got Max I was 15. He kept me company on long nights of studying for exams and writing essays. It is safe to say that Max probably had the greatest working knowledge of the genetic foundations of natural selection, the Westminster system of government and the poetry of T. S. Eliot of any miniature schnauzer in the greater Bayside area. His knowledge of algebra was never great, but that's probably more my fault than his.
After we both completed a BA and a law degree, I took up a job which had me on the move more than Max or I would have chosen. I would often be away for six months at a time on the other side of the world. When I returned, Max would welcome me like I had never been away. For me Max was home.
This week I have spoken with my folks every day, the most since I moved out of home. The first and last thing Max gave us was his most precious gift. He brought our family together in a way that no person could. It's nice to know he always will.
Friendship Edict - Top and not so top friends
Category: MySpace
TOP FRIENDS EDICT #2 Hello 641 Friends.
It is time to announce some of the changes my top friends as they currently stand. To the new inclusions, a hearty 'well done'. To those that have lost their places, I would say 'try harder' but sometimes I just don't know why I bother (Leonard Cohen!!).
As I have said before, this announcement should be seen as an incentive. If you want to make the top friends list, it is possible. It's not set in stone. Changes are made all the time. You just have to go out there and make it happen.
Like Luke Toulson. My friend in London who went out and won himself the Hackney Empire New Comic Competition. Some might ask, if you've already been nominated for a Perrier, how are you a new comic? Well, go and check out his act and you'll see just how NEW he is. Congratulations Luke and welcome to the top 20.
Also a big thumbs up to Scott Dooley. Already in the top 20 but moves this week up to number two. This is a reminder to those who are in the top 20 to not rest on their friendship laurels. With sott moving into the number two spot, should Cam Knight feel worried in number 1? No. Becase he will learn from this that he MUST TRY HARDER! But well done to scott.
While we're on the subject of 'Total Rudy's' (Notre Dame fans holler if you hear me), Sammy J, award winning comedian and juice loving freak strolls into the top twenty. He will, coincidentally, be co-hosting a new show with me at the festival club in MElbourne in April.
Maeve Higgins is in because she's jus lovely. Ad also becasue she gets here from Ireland soon and a 'Welcome to my top twenty' is a pretty good catch-up-ice-breaker.
Now to those who say I have a 'Comedian Heavy' (and yes, there have been some critics. [Bert Newton!]) note the new musical inclusions. Paul Weller makes the much anticipated step into the circle of friends (or twenty sided icosahedron of joy) in recognition of his great work on my ipod during the week. Yes, he was over fixing my ipod. Thanks Paul.
We also have Sophie Koh of the Northern territory whose great work on the Acoustic 2 CD got me through a really annoying flight.
And lastly a big welcome to Holly Throsby, who's abum 'On Night' I found unpacking a box in my new house. It has been gve a thorough spin since.
THE OUT CROWD Minchin. You landed in the country on the weekend. Still haven't called. Adealide is where you belong. Out of the top 20 my friend....and so's your baby while I'm at it.
Perfect - You know why!
Leonard Cohen - So do you!
SEVERE CAUTION NOTICE GOES TO When I make a friendship request, I don;t wannt to be left hanging. That's right, Dalai Llama, I'm talking to you. Not very good Karma to leave a brother hangin' on the hook up. Sure, you could argue that I was only adding you to anger the Chinese government, but that's between me and Beijing. Stay out of it!
Friendship Edict: Setting Things Straight
Category: MySpace
Dear 699 Friends
There hase been a disturbing incident at the Charlie Pickering International Headquarters in Northcote, Wisconsin, Tajikistan.
It appears that somebody has hacked my account and used my edict bulletin service for their own personal, albeit ultruistic, reasons. I would like to say a few words about this.
The message sent was: "Hi, there! b4a I had to tell you about this great hook up site.I joined it last Wednesday and I got laid twice last weekend ?28by 2 different girls) How cool is that? Its so easy and these babes want to hook up ?ight away with any guys they meet.I'm tellin you, you will get some action. Check it out and see ?hat you think. I am sure you will be thrilled with results.Oh I forgot to mention, it doesnt cost anything to join in the ?un."
First of all, I have no objection to 'hooking up'. I think it is a worthy pasttime. IN fact if it weren't for two people 'hooking up' in late november 1976, I wouldn't be here at all and this edict cerainly would not exist. I have no truck with hooking up per se.
I am also in favour of hooking up with multiple anonymous partners. 2 diffrent girls in two days? Well done. You've made us all very proud. Based on what little I know about 'hooking up' that sounds like quite a good strike rate.
I also have no problem with telling as many people as possible about your hooking up. In truth, that is largely what 'hooking up' and the 'internet' is for. This person clearly intended to share the vast booty he has plundered and that is to be applauded.
My objection is to the scandalous identity theft which has occurred and the flagrant disregard for grammar and punctuation. On the occaisions (and there have been plenty, I assure you) that I have 'hooked up' not once have I gotten so overcome with sexual delight that I have believed myself to be another person or completely turned my back on my education. I have certainly never been in such a post-orgasmic haze that I have hacked someone else's myspace account and put superfluous brackets and other punctuation in my sentences. This sort of behaviour is unforgivable.
O hereby declare that the only person who is allowed to use my edict service to advertise their own personal exploits is me. With that in mind, come and see my show at the Melbourne International Comedy Festival. Details are:
CHARLIE PICKERING: IMPRACTICAL JOKES In 1986, Charlie's dad was pushed into a pool by his best friend. What followed was ten years of payback involving three toilets, a poodle, daffodils and the State Emergency Service. When maturity is the first casualty of war, things tend to escalate.
The show had a very successful debut at the Adelaide Fringe festival last month: Nominated Best Comedy Show - Adelaide Fringe 07 ****1/2 - The Sunday Mail ****1/2 - The Adelaide Advertiser
April 5-29 @ 9:45PM Melbourne Town Hall For tickets: http://www.comedyfestival.com.au/season/2007/show/264/
Friendship Edict - 750 words for 1000 Friends
Category: MySpace
[By popular request, I am posting my friendship edict bulletins in my blogs.]
Dearest 1090 Friends.
We have done it! 1000 friends. There are those who said it wouldn't happen (you now who you are, Lee Hazelwood!)
I would like to announce that my 1000th friend was FLANAZ. To honour this momentous achievement, FLANAZ will occupy my number 1 friend position for a week. This is one of Myspace's most highly sought after accolades. It is even more special than someone seeing one of your photos and posting "Oooh, U R Hot. We should meet up ;)" Yes, even more special than that (Leonard Cohen!).
I will, by way of introduction, share a snippet of information about FLANAZ, so that he can be all of your friend, not just mine.
FLANAZ is a Male, 14 years old from "LONGFORD-THE BIG G", Tasmania Australia.
When it comes to music, his interests are "anything other than pop and my chemical romance. i hate my chemical romance they suck left nut. Some good bands/ singers would be The Red Riders, Grinspoon, Kings of Leon, Wangle, The Kaiser chiefs, Arctic Monkeys, Nirvana, White stripes, Kisschasy, The long blondes, eskimo joe, the grates, end of fashion little birdy, bob evanz, Ben Kweller, wolfmother and the black keys"
Like FLANAZ, I like the Black Keys, Kings of Leon, Ben Kweller and many of the other artists listed. I also hold a similar opinion to that of FLANAZ regarding My Chemical Romance and my left testicle. Something tells me that FLANAZ and I are going to get along just fine.
If you get the chance, visit FLANAZ page and add him as a friend. If anyone deserves to also have 1000 friends, it is this plucky 14 year-old from Tasmania, wise beyond his years.
In other news I have had no luck in requesting special dispensation from Myspace for a top friends expansion of 1 friend from 24 to 25. Whilst I explained that with my friendship reservoir reaching a record 1000, an increase of 1 top friend amounted to a mere .001%, they remain unmoved. And so this month, I have rearranged the top 24.
There will be some heartache and much soul searching. There will also be jubilation. Unfortunately there will no doubt be some cockiness, which will be duly punished, I assure you. (Oasis, I'm looking at you!)
Going into the top 24 for the first time are my good friends the Kings of Leon. Great work on the new album guys! The 'Credence Clearwater Revival' for the now generation have made a tentative step towards stadium rock and I think it will suit them well. (Save one of them swamp-possum pies for me, yawl!)
Barack Obama also makes his first top friends appearance. Barack and I have been firm friends for a while now. I have been working on some strong grass-roots campaigning in the Fitzroy and Greater Northcote Area. You can expect to see a bounce come the City of Yarra Primaries. You may be a senator, Barak, but you are now a Charlie Pickering Top Friend. When your memories of being the first black president (and the man who brought peace to not only the middle east but the entire world) have faded, your memory of being in the top 24 will remain. Keep punching, big guy!
My old partner (that's radio, not sex - keep your mind out of the gutter Harvey Keitel!) Mel Bampton also steps into the top 20. Things are pretty good between us. We speak about twice a year, but after spending eight hours a day yabbeing at each other at work, the silence is pretty golden.
In other news, I have recently resolved to post more blogs. This will either be columns from somewhere else or random musings. I should be able to do at least 1 a week, so this weeks hot Charlie tip is to subscribe to my blog. Rad! Isn't that right, Lou Reed!
I know that once a week isn't that many blogs, but it's more than some people (Socrates!) who haven't done a blog in centuries (Immanuel Khant!).
There will be regular changes to the top 24. Some people like saucy Kirsty deserve their moment of glory. This will happen as soon as one of the top 24 lets me down (Scott Dooley!) or dies (Scott Dooley!) or lets me down by dying (Scott Dooley!)…(oh, you don't know about that yet….I mean….Elliott Smith!).
Until next time, reach for the skies and thanks for being a part of the 1000, you millenniamaniacs! (Scott Dooley!)
