8:40 AM - No One Wants To Get shivved Playing Water Polo
Current mood: sneaky
Category: Sports
I've been watching the Olympics. I know I kept saying I wasn't going to, but I was sucked in. I was just minding my own business one day, happened to walk by the T.V. while mens basketball ,Argentina vs. Lithuania , was on and that was all she wrote.
This morning tennis was on. I not a fan tennis. Never have been, probably never will be. Most possibly because I can't play the game worth a fuck. I generally prefer to say it's because it's a damn ass boring game. Oh well I digress, back on topic. I decided to take advantage of tennis' boringness and the fact the kids are still asleep to try and find used( or at least cheap ) books I need for my fall classes. In the background i can hear that Venus Williams, despite playing like crap, won and they were talking about the next event, water polo.BUGGER. I don't want to watch water polo either.I've never quite understood why it exists.
After the typical boring introduction into the sport. You know the ones...." water polo began in the late 1600's when Milo Von Ettelson fell into a lake while playing football. Members of the opposing team jumped in after him trying to regain control of the ball ( off sides rules didn't exist yet ). A rousing game of keep-away ensued and the men determined this new game to be a more enjoyable sport on hot summer days then football" Then they nonchalantly announced the countries who would be playing.
" We now take you to Serbia vs. Croatia in water polo."
I slowly leaned back in my chair and turned my head to read the names on the screen myself.
Serbia vs. Croatia
"Holy Fuck !!!!!!"
I couldn't believe it! I am totally amazed they let them in the same venue at the same time, much less have them competing and in water.Way too easy for them to drowned each other. I really hope a very detailed search for weaponry occurred before that match.
Serbs and Croats competing in the Olympics. It boggles me. For some reason it never occurred me before today that countries with a history like theirs would ever be placed in head-to-head competition . I makes sense that they would when I think about it, I've just never thought about it before.
I'll say one thing it's been one exciting game. Fouls a plenty. Ejections like mad.I have never seen as aggressive a game of water polo in my life.I've heard the term " Olympic truce " used many times, but I don't think they've told these players.
I'm not sure where I'm going with this. So I'll leave that up to you guys. Sooooo it's been awhile since I had you guys over to my house. Anything new? Are you watching the Olympics? Why did I fell the need to make homemade donuts for breakfast the day after I found out I've lost 3lbs? Why does my dog bark one random bark then lay her head back down? If I know it's going to hurt if I poke the incision on the back of my foot, why do I keep doing it? Why do the birds only crap on my clothes on the clothes line? Why do I feel the need to rearrange all the furniture in my living room every other month?
I wish a wonderfully good day to all who happen to wander by here. :-)
5:52 AM - I’ll see your 15 and raise you one ~~~tag~~~
Current mood: sleepy
Category: Quiz/Survey
I was tagged by my friend Roscoe.It 's the normal...
Once you've been tagged, you have to write a blog with 16 random things, facts, habits or goals about you.
I was kind of at a loss as to what the 16 things could be. I think you guys pretty much know all there is to know about me at this point. So I decided to take something I saw on...ummm...possibly Soogat's blog and use music for the idea for my 16 things.I hit shuffle on iTunes and the first 16 songs that came up will be the launching point to trigger a bit of information to share with you.
Oh and I'm sticking a video player at the bottom in case you want to hear the songs for yourself.
1) Mr. Boombastic -- Shaggy ~~ I think confidence makes a person sexy and arrogance makes them ugly.~~
2) Oh, Goddamnit ---- Hot Hot Heat ~~ I am constantly loosing something. It could be my keys, my shoes, my book..... anything. I spend most of my day looking for something~~
3) Home --- Blake Shelton ~~ I like being home. I'm not a big traveler. I like camping and the simple things in life. ~~
4) Under The Knife --- Rise Against ~~ In my old age I think more and more about getting cosmetic surgery.Nothing on the face, but a little tuck of the belly(it's been a home for five fetuses for godssake), give the girls a hoist, those kinds of things.~~
5) Miss Murder --- A.F.I. ~~ I kill house plants. I have planters outside full of flowers and an abundant garden, but if I bring a plant in the house it's a guaranteed death sentence.~~
6) Lust For Life --- Iggy Pop ~~I got me one of those, I think it's important.~~
7) She Hates Me --- Puddle of Mudd ~~ I'm sure there are quite a few people who do, and I'm also sure they have good reason to. I can be a bitch sometimes.~~
8) Kodachrome --- Paul Simon ~~ I love taking pictures.I actually bought a Nikon camera because of this song. It's dead now, it won't read memory cards anymore. I am saving my pennies to buy a new Canon digital SLR camera.~~
9) Dance Inside --- The All-American Rejects ~~I love the idea of dancing, but don't have the gift. That little fact doesn't stop me from dancing in my house though, my daughters and I dance all over the kitchen while we're cooking supper. I did the same with the boys, now that they are getting older they realize just how 'odd' Mummies dancing is and stay away when I'm doing it.~~
10) The Curse of Curves --- Cute Is What We Aim For ~~ Boy howdy do I have the curse of curves,and my goal is to try and tame some of them between now and next summer.It's been long enough since I had 5, hurt my knee, hurt my foot, and yadda yadda yadda. It's time to stop making excuses and drag my ass back to the gym.It's amazing how when no one sees you naked on a regular basis you just kinda go ppfftt~~
11) Bring It On Home --- Little Big Town ~~I am trying to learn how to share more of my feelings. Sooommme people in my life seem to think I keep too much inside and it's not healthy~~
12) Hey Pachuco --- Royal Crown Review ~~ I love swing music and big bands.I love most things about that time period. The movies, clothes, architecture... I feel a strong connection to that time period.~~
13) Smile Like You Mean It --- The Killers ~~ Raising boys is a lot more pressure then I was expecting. The girls have been pretty easy for me. the boys...well... I just don't get it.
14) Sassafras Roots --- Green Day ~~ One of my favorite memories from my childhood was going out into the woods with my Dad, collecting sassafras roots, bringing them home,and making sassafras tea.~~
15) Right Here In My Arms --- H.I.M. ~~ I'm a snuggler.Watching a movie on the sofa, laying in bed, or even driving in the car I'll sneak up and snuggle.My friends find that very funny because I don't like most people to touch me, but when I like someone I'm one of those people.~~
16) Canon in D Major ---- Johann Pachelbel~~I love classical music, it really centers me. I used to play the viola and have always had a soft spot for Pachelbel's Canon because it hasa viola pizzicato piece that is frequently added.There aren't very many songs that feature a viola. It really should be featured more often, it has a beautiful rich, deep tone.~~
3:12 AM - MY DREAM TEAM.
Current mood: horny
Category: Life
IT'S FINALS WEEK AND I'M STRESSED. I WANT TO HAVE FUN AND NOT THINK FOR AWHILE.WHEN I WANT TO JUST HAVE FUN AND NOT THINK MY MIND NATURALLY WANDERS TO MY FANTASY LINE UP.NO IT'S NOT FOR A SPORTS TEAM, WELL AN ORGANIZED SPORT ANYWAY. HERE YOU GO, AN IDEA STOLEN FROM G AND ANTHROGEEK
MY PERVIE TOP 10
BLAKE SHELTON I LOVE HIS SENSE OF HUMOR, HIS SINGING, AND THOSE BLUE EYES......OMG!
JOHNNY DEPP I THINK EVERY FEMALE WITH A HEARTBEAT UNDERSTANDS THIS ONE,AND HE JUST GETS BETTER WITH AGE
DIERKS BENTLEY THE FIRST TIME I SAW HIM MY HEART WENT THUMPITA-THUMPITA.( THAT MOUTH AND THOSE EYES) THEN I LISTENED TO THE INTERVIEW,I LAUGHED MY ASS OFF AND THOUGHT MMHHMMM FUNNY, I LIKE FUNNY.THEN I HEARD HIM SING *SIGH*. IN THE POST PERFORMANCE INTERVIEW I FOUND OUT HE WRITES MOST OF HIS SONGS HIMSELF AND WENT HUMINA-HUMINA-HUMINA.IT ONLY TOOK 30 MINUTES AND I WAS SMITTEN.I HIGHLY RECOMMEND LISTENING TO SOME OF HIS SONGS.
CHIP FOOSE I FEEL A N ELEMENT OF CONFUSION COMING FROM YOU ON THIS ONE. HE DESIGNS CARS LIKE THIS;
AND I FIND THAT SEXY AS FUCK! IS THAT ONE SEXY CUSTOM CHALLENGER OR WHAT!
GEORGE CLOONEY THAT PICTURE PRETTY MUCH SUMS IT UP
SALMA HAYEK EVERY GUY(AND PROBABLY SOME OF THE GIRLS) GET THIS ONE WITH NO FURTHER EXPLANATION NECESSARY
DAVID GROHL TWO REASONS NIRVANA AND FOO FIGHTERS
JARED LETO ONCE AGAIN, THOSE BLUE EYES . PLUS HE WAS IN ONE OF THE BEST EFFIN MOVIES EVER "FIGHT CLUB" AND HIS BAND "30 SECONDS TO MARS" IS PRETTY SNIFTY TOO.
OH AND THERE IS THIS......
BRIAN URLACHER CHICAGO BEARS 54
(PICTURES FROM THE TRAINING CAMP IN BOURBONNAIS)
I HAVE BEEN SMITTEN WITH HIM EVER SINCE I RAN INTO HIM AT A STORE HERE IN MY TOWN.IT WAS THE FIRST YEAR OF TRAINING CAMP. MY OLDEST HAD ASKED ME IF WE MIGHT RUN INTO SOME OF THE BEARS AROUND TOWN NOW THAT TRAINING CAMP WAS IN SECESSION? I TOLD HIM THAT I HAD ONLY EVER SEEN THEM ON T.V. AND IN UNIFORM AND WOULDN'T KNOW A CHICAGO BEAR IN PERSON IF ONE CAME UP AND BIT MY NOSE. THEN A MOUNTAIN OF A MAN CAME AROUND THE CORNER, BENT OVER, NIBBLED ON MY NOSE, AND SAID ' NOW YOU KNOW ONE' AND WALKED OFF.I WISH I HAD MANAGED SOMETHING LIKE ASKING FOR HIS AUTOGRAPH, GETTING A PICTURE WITH THE CAMERA IN MY PHONE, ANYTHING. ALL I MANAGED TO DO WAS STAND THERE SMILING AND GIGGLING LIKE I HAD LOST MY MIND.
CARY GRANT HE IS IT STYLE ,GRACE, A FAST TALKER WITH A WICKED SENSE OF HUMOR (ON SCREEN AND OFF). Once told by an interviewer, "Everybody would like to be Cary Grant," Grant is said to have replied, "So would I." One of his favorite poems was a bit of doggerel: "They bought me a box of tin soldiers,/I threw all the Generals away,/I smashed up the Sergents and Majors,/Now I play with my Privates all day." I love those kind of little poems! He never played a villain.He played some sketchy people but never a villain. He was the lead in some of my favorite movies and the male lead in my favorite movie of all time " People Will Talk".
and my number one has to be...... VILLE VALO I LOVE HIS MUSIC,HIS VOICE,HIS LYRICS( HE WRITES H.I.M.'S LYRICS ) HIS ARTWORK, HIS POETRY,HIS EYES,HIS MOUTH,HIS FACE, HIS BODY HIS...... FILL IN THE BLANKS WITH WHAT YOU LIKE. I WANT TO DO THINGS TO THAT MAN THAT WOULD SCARE YOU.
IF I COULD COUNT THAT WOULD BE TEN NOT ELEVEN. IS ANYONE ELSE KINDA NERVOUS THAT MY FINAL TOMORROW IS IN AN ALGEBRA CLASS? I AM SO BURNT OUT I CAN'T EVEN COUNT TO TEN CORRECTLY MUCH LESS MANAGE USING THE QUADRIC FORMULA. OH WELL.
YOU KNEW IT WAS COMING...
SOOOOOO WHO IS IN YOUR FANTASY LINE UP?
Currently
listening
:
Blood Sugar Sex Magik
By
Red Hot Chili Peppers
Release date: 1991-09-24
5:58 AM - Yesterday was one of those days
Current mood: optimistic
Category: Life
Yesterday was one of those days.A day where everything just went sideways.It was supposed to be a busy day, but almost everything canceled on Thursday.I remember thinking when I went to sleep that Wednesday would be an easy day because of that fact. I was wrong.
I'm going to break it down in bite sized sections so it's easier to digest.
I awoke to the sound of my cell phone ringing. It was my friends Lynz.There might be some slight variations on the words used but here is an outline of how the conversation;
Me: Hello
Lynz: Hey, me and the kids aren't gonna make it to the movie today so don't wait for us.
"What's up?"
"I'm waiting for the plumber"
"What happened?"
"Conner tried to flush an entire roll of unrolled toilet paper and now the boys bathroom toilet is all blocked up and overflowing all over"
"Did you shut off the water?"
"to the house?"
" no to the toilet "
" no, the plumber didn't say to "
" well do it before the whole upstairs is covered in water!"
I walk her through how to shut off the water
Me:" So what more is wrong that you need a plumber?"
Lynz:" I told you the toilet is all blocked with potty paper"
"and?"
"and nothing but I'm not reaching into the drain and pull it out"
" what about a plunger?"
"a what?"
" a plunger"
" what the hell is that?"
" seriously?"
" yeah"
" the thing you use to unclog drains. a dome shaped piece of rubber on a stick. you know, A PLUNGER"
" not all of us had a plumber as a father, don't talk down to me"
" everyone knows what a plunger is Lynz"
" obviously NOT"
" whatever. just drive the boys over to the hardware store and get one for like five bucks and unclog it yourself"
" there's more to it that that"
" nah, that's pretty much it"
" there has to be more or it wouldn't cost that much for the plumber to come over to the house and fix the toilet when it gets all clogged"
" you're paying for the house call. "
" so if I brought the toilet in for them to unclog it, it would cost less"
silence.........
" yah know what Lynz why don't you call and ask. I bet if you offered to bring your toilet in to have them unclog it there, they would give you a damn fine deal. hell they might even offer to pay YOU to have yo bring your clogged toilet into the shop to have them fix it there instead of them having to drive all the way to the boonies to fix it at your house"
Evil? Possibly. Fun? Hell yeah! That is going to be one funny ass phone call.
Then I realized it was already 8:30 and I had an hour to take a shower and get five kids ready to head out the door and got off the phone.
The movie this week was " Water Horse". Little Rue was really looking forward to seeing it.She love dinosaurs, saw the movie poster, and was excited to see a "real" dinosaur in a movie.She's four, it's real to her.
We get there right before 10 and the place is packed. We finally found seats together for all of us in the second row off to one side.About ten minutes in I realized that what is spilled in all the other rows was flowing right down to us. Ooey, gooey, sticky fun.LilBits falls asleep within minutes, that was one good thing, she wasn't trying to climb down and get into the mess.
With around twenty minutes left in the movie the whole place suddenly goes dark. The lights pop on, then back off. There are kids screaming everywhere. Parents are yelling for their kids to stay with them and trying to round them up. Finally the back up lights kicked back on.The manager came up on the stage and announced that there was an electrical problem, they weren't going to be able to finish running the movie, and we needed to clear the theatre for safety reasons.Rue was pissed, she started wailing.The manager was handing out vouchers to get into next weeks movie for free to everyone as the walked out.As we pass her Rue gives her the evil eye and says " You suck". I give her the stern Mommy look and tell her to apologize for that. So she says " I'm sorry you suck" . She's sweet like that.
As we were heading into the restaurant for lunch my sister calls and asks if we " made it out in time". "Umm from where" " The Paramount. There are firetrucks here"
Oh my. As it turns out the manager decided not to "yell fire in a crowded theatre" and just said there was an electrical problem and we all need to leave immediately , not that the electrical problem was an electrical fire. I guess with all the kids, most on field trips from daycare, day camps, and the like where there are five or so kids for every adult saying the word "fire" would have started a dangerous stampede. I still wonder why the alarms never went off. I guess it wasn't big enough of a fire.
After lunch we went to Target to buy " Water Horse" so the kids could watch the end of the movie.Nothing much happened here except on the way in a bird flew into my head.Yep, right into my head. _______________________________________________________
I went to piano lessons and dropped off my son, Von Awesome and drove off. The problem? Emo is the one who takes piano lessons. I didn't realize what I did until I got to the pool to drop off Von. Von got out so Emo could get out of the back seat at piano lessons, I said shut the door, and off I went. Nice Mommy.I went back to exchange children. He was inside having cookies. She reassured me it's not the first time a Mom has done that.
Doing everything takes at least twice as long. Bears camp opened this week. Fans and reporters are everywhere.I ran a couple errands cussing at them the whole time.
I got home and started working on my homework. I needed a ruler. It took me 45 effin minutes to find a ruler in my house. I have quilting rulers in my sewing box, but I needed a basic 12" ruler. Before yesterday I would have assumed that if I needed a ruler one would be pretty easy to come across. Who knew.
I stopped on the way home to get something for supper. There were some numb-nuts there acting like idiots.You know the basic 10-14 year old kids that run amok while Mommy is busy flirting with everything with a penis, trying to find the hellions a new ' daddy '. They were giving people at the tables shit like " Ewe that looks gross" " Put down the foot long and step away from the table before the chair breaks". I'm keeping an eye on them getting slightly annoyed and looking over at "mommy" who is turned sideways in her booth so she can flirt with the guy across from her. She's over there tossing her head back, laughing, putting her hand on his knee while her demon spawn is terrorizing everyone in Subway.
When they came over by me I just gave them a hard blank face and said " Don't even think of starting anything with me you fiends" The group leader says " Oh yeah whatcha gonna do aboudit?"
" Bite your face off " and without flinching I opened my mouth as big as it would go and made about four or five jaw snapping movements while moving my face closer to his.
" MOOOOMMMMMMM that crazy lady just tried to bite me!!!!!"
She comes over and gets all in my face and says " what the hell are you doing?"
I just shrugged and said " I have no idea what he's talking about.Sounds like he has issues"
i looked over at the girl behind the counter she just shrugged. The people sitting next to us just shrugged and the kid keeps yelling. " she almost bit my face Mom"
" Now why would I do that? Besides you're a good mother who pays attention to what your children are doing in public. You wouldn't let them run around a restaurant terrorizing the customers while you ignore them so you can try and pick up a guy who is obviously already married. Being the responsible, adult you are you would have noticed if your children were being threatened and almost assaulted by a complete stranger. Right? So it couldn't have happened. MOMMY( said in a total bitchy tone) would have seen it"
" Bitch"
Completely stone faced "You've gotta call things the way you see them, and I've gotta call things the way I see them."
Poof she was gone.
Childish and inappropriate, yes. But I had a crappy day. You know what? I'm am sick and tired of working my ass off trying to be a good mother while all these other missing links get to let their kids run wild. I think more of them need to be called on it.
5:55 AM - Mammatus Clouds
Current mood: amused
Category: Life
I was watching the weather this morning. We've had some bad storms roll through between last night and this morning and it looks like we'll be getting more.
The woman presenting the weather was describing the type of clouds that are heading our way. She described them as mammatus clouds.Between the way she pronounced the word and my infamous habit of slightly skewing what I hear *cough*butt cherry*cough* I could have sworn she said mammary clouds.
Boobie clouds?
HHMMMMM
Who knew????
Somewhere around the fourth or fifth time I heard the word I got it right. Being a curious person off to google I went.They are described as large storm clouds with bulges hanging down. HHMMM curious. I did a google image search of mammatus clouds and found out these are mammatus clouds.
Pretty damn close to....
If you ask me.I mean for being only clouds and all.
I've been tagged by The Freaking Sugarplum Fairy. And...well...this one requires a
Disclaimer:
This blog contains adult content. This blog contains adult questions and adult answers to those questions.
If you feel that you are either too young, too immature, or for some other reason unequipped to handle a blog of that nature please use the X at the top and close the blog before you read any further.
Consider yourself warned.
On with the tag.
1. Oh my God that was embarrassing, now let's do it again… (This is an experience where you were having sex and something happened that embarrassed you – but the sex was good/great so if had the chance to change it – you would do it all over again – embarrassment and all…)
I would have to say that would be my first experience with a queef. It was also my first experience with having sex doggy style.The sex was very enjoyable. Then it happened. He pulled out and laid down, I went to lay down next to him, and as I rolled over I heard it. The first thought that came to mind was Oh my god my pussy just farted, it's never done that before. I tried to open my mouth to say something to the effect of ' My vag doesn't normally talk', but I was so embarrassed I couldn't say anything. I looked over at him and he was laughing his ass off. He thought it was absolutely hilarious. He had the advantage of having prior experience with them.I on the other hand thought I was a freak who somehow had the ability to rip a stink-bomb out both the front and the back door.
2. Oh my God that was embarrassing, let's never do it again…(Same as above, except this experience you would never do again – and if you had the chance to erase it out of your life/memory – you would take it !!!)
The time that comes to mind wasn't actually sex, but it was sexual. It was one of my first experiences with full hands on, completely naked, fumbling around.Things were getting good. There was kissing, touching, rubbing, mouths were being put in new and fun places and he asked if I wanted to go all the way. I gave him the green light and he whips out the condom he had been carrying in his wallet for the past two years.He began trying to figure out how the hell you put one on. I'm sitting in front of him on the bed. He finally gets it over the head and it popped off. I decided I would hold his penis while he put it on and then help him roll it down. I'm thinking between the two of us we should manage it. Between the previous action, having a naked girl in front of him, and all the self rubbing going on while he was trying to get the condom on he was EXTREMELY excited. When I grabbed hold all it took was a little movement on my part and he was done. Heres the kicker.... he didn't have the condom on and at the angle he was at he blew his load in his own face. That not being a pleasurable experience made him throw up all over me. Needless to say he and I never did get down to the nitty gritty.
3.Sex in a hallowed hall (Where is the most embarrassing/dangerous/revealing place you have ever had sex, I am talking church, library, airplane, bridge, elevator – I'm not talking somewhere safe like a tent in the woods people!!!)
I would have to say the most dangerous place I've had sex, as far as potential of getting caught would have to be the dressing room at Target.I had been trying on some clothes and undergarments and asked E to come into the dressing room to unhook my bra. He came in , unhooked the bra, and the rest is history. Very fun history.I could hear people coming and going out of the rooms on either side of us , people talking on the other side of the wall, there we were going at it like monkeys right in the middle of them, and they had no clue.
4. Edible or otherwise (So on a scale of 1 to 10 how much do you love receiving oral sex? On a scale of 1 to 10 how much do you love giving oral sex? Are there any considerations or something that will stop you from giving oral sex, new partner, blackberries, earning your red wings, you don't want to be a member of the yeastie boys?)
O.K. eewwwee on the end of that question,blackberries, earning your red wings, you don't want to be a member of the yeastie boys blaaa.
First giving...I'll go with an 8 or so. Lets face it, it makes them happy and requires a lot less effort then full on sex.I don't mind it, I do mind when they just expect it. If it's not special it loses some of the charm.
Now for receiving.Brace yourself, I'll go with 4(?). If I'm in a relationship and been there for awhile it can be great. But it is very personal and would feel strange if I really didn't know someone well.I much prefer being the one making someone feel good. Plus you run the risk of their oral looking and sounding something like a bull dog getting a drink.That would be a huge turn off.I can be slightly(very) demanding. I want it done right or you might as well not even bother and that most definitely applies to eating out.
5. Leather, golden showers, or toe licking anyone? (Have any fetishes you are willing to disclose – do you get off on leather, women's shoes, licking your lovers toes, golden showers, I could go on – but I think you get the idea!)
Nothing to say here I have nothing even close to a fetish.
6. Olly-olly oxen free? (What type of sexual games do you play? Do you ever play with toys, how about dress up? How about play doctor? Do you use props? What's your favorite sexual game? Ever traced the alphabet with your tongue?)
HEHEHE lets see...games I like. Toys are wonderful. A little tie me up tie me down is fun. Handcuffs work to. Tickling while handcuffed is fun among other things. Now that is a great time for giving lip if your going to give it.I'm pretty open when it comes to these kinds of things.I haven't really done much in the way of dressing up though. I have done the fun game of having your lover pick you up at a bar. That is fun. It's kind of like cheating, but not.You go to a place, get picked up, go to a motel for some hot and nasty, take a shower and go home( in separate cars obviously) but it's with your man and when you are home you never talk about what happened when you were out.
7. Vanilla, chocolate, or bubble gum? (If you are unsure what I mean here – do your consider yourself VANILLA – meaning missionary sex, once a week, with your husband/wife, and then fade off to sleep after a possible orgasm by one or both of you, if any? Or are you CHOCOLATE, meaning switch it up a little, bring in some toys, have sex during different hours whenever the mood hits, and always an orgasm, maybe a couple for both of you, with sex whenever the mood hits, maybe once a day/night? Or are you BUBBLE GUM – anything goes, swinger, multiple partners, sex several times a day, multiple orgasms, own every toy or gadget known to man or don't need them, as you have so many varied sizes of partners :)… - So fess up – which are you – or on a scale in between.
I guess among those choices I'll have to go with chocolate.Being a Mom vanilla does pop up frequently, but I try to keep life as chocolate as possible.
8. X-X-X been there, done that? (What was the first sexual item you have ever bought – excluding KY Jelly at Walmart, I am talking your first trip to the sex shop, the adult book store, or that intimate catalog online?)
The first toy I got was actually given to me by my husband. Something about how I was trying to kill him or something.I know there is at least one of you who can attest to the fact that my aggressive 'man like' sex drive is just my nature and I can't help it.I was literally born to be aggressive sexually.
The first one I bought myself was called a blue dolphin.I liked the colour and the size. It was sleek, made out of gel, and looked like it could be very useful in a variety of situations.I bought it online not an adult store though. I have bought all my stuff online. I have never been in a sex shop.One day maybe I'll work up the courage.
9. One, two, three, four, five? (Come clean – have you ever experienced group sex, ever partaken in an orgy or ever wanted to? Ever had a Menage-a-trois? Ever been at a bath house and not known how many you have partaken of?
Sorry just the standard one-on-one
10. Bareback or Brokeback? (Tell the truth – do you lay rubber – safe sex – or are you in a committed relationship? Do you prefer not to lay rubber? Are you bareback or brokeback? If you are into the southern route do you use a dental dam?)
I really do not like condoms.Not only don't they feel good, but they stink. I would much rather go to the local clinic and get tested for STDs and just use VCF. Those are the reasons right? Prevent STDs and pregnancy. If you have no STDs then spermicide is much more palatable then a condom.
The Joker also tagged me with a question tag.
Post a blog inviting people to ask you any question they want, pick 10 of the most interesting whether you like them or not and than blog the answers.
I'm not sure if posting the two tags together was the best of ideas teehee. The questions are supposed to be deviant or something like that.So be original and ask away.
I'm supposed to tag someone - as per typical tag rules. I'm not sure who I could get to do this. I think it would be fun to hear from.. John, G, Joko,SW,Niki Roks. I think hearing from Mama Rose and CA would be neat too, but I don't think thats gonna happen ( esp from CA) . I doubt anyone will do it but by naming a few I have met my tag obligation : )
Well that wasn't so bad. Go ahead ask away.I'll be back later to see if anyone even leaves a comment much less a question. lol
Currently
listening
:
...Is a Real Boy
By
Say Anything
Release date: 2006-10-10
5:13 PM - Anybody out there want to remind me again why I had children
Current mood: frustrated
Category: Life
Anybody out there want to remind me again why I had children. Anybody? Anyone? Does anyone have any idea, because right now I'm at a loss for why I chose to reproduce.
I'm pretty sure that if I changed my status from Mother to prisoner of war I would be required better treatment under the Geneva Convention.
I can't remember the the last time I was allowed to go to the bathroom with out an audience. Or take a shower with out someone at some point either pulling the curtain open or sticking their head in to tell me what an older sibling is or isn't doing.Or having the youngest deciding to join me.
Or I was allowed to have a conversation, on the phone or in person, with out constant monitoring." Who are you talking to?" "Why?" " What are they saying?"
They keep taking my hair brush and my toothbrush. Everyday when I go to get ready one of them is missing and has to be hunted down. For the longest time I couldn't figure out why they were taking them. Then one day half-way through an episode of CSI it hit me, they want my DNA. Sorry kids I have bad news for you I am your biological mother.
I am beginning to think that this thing called ' hot food ' is an urban legend spread by people without children to make us parents jealous.
Health care HA!!!! just try getting sick when your a parent and see the mercy you get.Repatriated if seriously ill or wounded, hehehehehe imagine that. You break your arm and get a cold and suddenly a nanny shows up to watch the kids and you are on vacation until you heel. Dream on suckers you better learn how to change a diaper one handed ( which most mommies can do anyway) and be thankful for the stuffed up nose while you do it.
Next time I'm hit with a barrage of whys I'm going to try that name,age,rank, and service number deal.
Look there I see they can't be deprived of valuables or money either.I'm liking this better and better.Every day it seams someone has their hand out for cash or has 'borrowed' something of mine never to be seen again.
While I guess they aren't technically 'holding me in confinement', they idea of taking this circus on a road trip isn't exactly appealing. It tends to be an 'only as necessary' operation.
My kids are grouping together to drive me nutty.
The youngest two have conspired to deny me sleep.Who knew their verbal skills were that good? They take turns being awake. One goes to sleep early and wakes early and the other refuses to fall asleep and then won't wake up in the morning.Then their naps don't line up. So mommy is mentally weakened by lack of sleep. Just the way they want me.
The oldest has to take summer school this year. Is he behind? Did he flunk? Nope as a matter of fact he is in the accelerated program, the top 5% in the state. Then why is summer school mandatory? He has too many tardies and absences and has to make up the time. I get to wake his butt up and make sure he is out the door by 7a.m. all summer and pay $200 for the privilege because he can't manage to break his tongue away from his girlfriends mouth and get to his classes on time. Also because he and his friends had better things to do then go to school on one or two or 25 days.
My oldest daughter is another little smarty pants. She is an academic achiever and headed to the gifted self contained classes next year. As a reward she got to go on two field trips this week and guess who she volunteered to chaperone both of them? That's right, me. Yesterday wasn't so bad we took a chartered bus to the zoo. Cooshie seats, a bathroom, and drop down screens playing a kiddy movie to keep the rascals busy. Not a bad day. But today* sigh *. My lovely daughter ratted me out as being CPR certified so her teacher specifically requested I came today. There was even daycare for the little two, bonus. The field trip today? Swimming at the YMCA.Nothing like wearing a swimsuit in front of young children. If you are ever curious about any body flaws you might have I recommend it because they'll tell you every one they find.
I had been giving my second youngest Rue the store ads,scissors, a glue stick, and some paper so she could make a book of what she wanted for her birthday. It kept her busy while I studied and helped keep her off my butt after my mom spilled the beans about her birthday coming up.She came up with ketchup, toothpaste, apples,carrots, a bike,Pull-ups, and a big screen T.V. One day last week I left the room to go check on lunch and came back to a baby with a mullet.Rue gave Lil Bits a haircut.I don't really want to get all her hair cut short enough to blend it, but my only other alternative may be to strip her down to a diaper and a NASCAR t-shirt and give her a baby bottle full of Coke-A-Cola.As punishment I told Rue she lost one thing off of her wish list. No big screen for her this year.
The only child who hasn't been giving me grief is my youngest son. I'm not sure if his compliance means much, he's medicated.That's right, the only one of my kids who has been under control is the one with ADD. How messed up is that?
Oh well I better quit bitching bathe 'em, and put 'em to bed. Good thing I love the furry little beasts.
Currently
listening
:
Pretty. Odd.
By
Panic at the Disco
Release date: 2008-03-25
I just had to take a minute before I went to bed to share this one.
Last night I decided to go on a extremely rare night out. It wasn't a planned night out. some friends from school and i had planned a study group to prepare for finals next week. After only about an hour we decided to eliminate the danger of study burn out and go out for a couple drinks instead.
The group decided to go to the local sports bar/microbrewery.Being a Friday night it was packed. A couple drinks into the night my friend Phylicia and I were standing at the bar getting another round for the table when a guy walks up and smiles at the two of us. I'll tell you what he actually said in a second. First I'll tell you what I thought he said. Between the talking and the games playing on the plasma screens hanging all over I heard .
" Hey there, either of you two girls have your butt cherry? "
* eyes widen, jaw drops *
Then Phylicia answers;
" I think so, maybe, I'm not really sure. "
at that point I wasn't sure weather to be more shocked by the question or her answer. I'm pretty sure most people know for certain if they have their butt cherry or not.
He turns to me " So hows about you?. I'm really into them, I think they are great."
I could only come up with..." I bet. A lot of guys seem to like them." honestly I was at a loss for a response.
He seemed surprised..."Around here? "
"Yeah, pretty much everywhere from what I've heard"
" WOW, I had no idea. You two looked like the type who would, but I kinda got the impression that most of the people around this town were suburban, white bread, kinda people who wouldn't get into something like that."
" You can never tell what people do behind closed doors "
he started laughing " Tru dat. So what's your fave"
" Excuse me? "
" I want to know your favorite. Right here right now and don't cop out and give me the ' there all good' bullshit. I want to now the one you like best"
O.K. He's cute but I ain't telling him that.Then my friend, my buddy, my pal says "come on emo kid, tell us
"Yeah that's right she called me emo. That led to a five minute segue into a conversation about how I AM NOT EMO! I had to concede. If you call this emo
I might be. I do wear girl pants, being a girl and all I prefer them. I have box frame glasses. I wear old band shirts. I use a messenger bag for school,a Sex Pistols one none the less. Converse is my casual shoe of choice. But I do not; have star tattoos, cut myself, or write poems about how the cold dark of the sunrise hurts my soul.
After about five minutes he looks at me and says " I like you, you're spunky"
then back to topic he went. " You never answered me"
I pretended to have nooo idea what he was talking about
" What's your favorite song?"
"Song?"
"Yeah we were talking about Buckcherry , remember? "
"Buckcherry? BUCKcherry? BUCK?" now I'm laughing hysterically.They have no idea why.Feeling the need to clear things up I yelled "Oh my gawd I thought you asked if we had our butt cherry"
He is beat red, I am laughing like a wacko, and my friend just walks off with her drink shaking her head. I assume she told the whole story to the rest of the group because suddenly everyone started laughing and for the rest of the night I was known as Buttcherry.
Downside, I may have a really strange new nickname. Upside, I got to have a really great music conversation with a really fun guy. We may even go see a movie tomorrow if I can nail down the oldest to babysit.
Well I have "heard of Buckcherry" (what he actually asked) and this is my favorite Buckcherry song 'Sorry'
ISN'T JOSH TODD SEXY WITH A CAPITOL 'S'
NUMMY ; )
See you guys later. I am going to try and get a nap in.
7:27 AM - Top Friends Cupid
Current mood: silly
Category: Friends
I saw this the other day on Little Miss No Name Rated ®'s blog It looked like fun and thought I would give it a go. I found the results down right comical.
it scans your friends list for all the vital information to determine your best and worst matches
and it scores your top friends
it only does 16 at a time ...grrrrrr. so I had to rotate friends and do it twice
and the results were
drum roll please....
ta dah
I found some of the results pretty funny. I was kinda bummed by the fact that they recommend I don't date H.I.M. But I guess it is for the best. While the lead singer, Ville Valo, stirs a reaction in me the details of which would make you blush, dating an entire band is NEVER a good idea. While my oldest thinks Trevor Moore is THE shit. I'm pretty sure he is mentally unbalanced, so that probably isn't a great idea either. I already knew I had a lot in common with Carly ( GoogelyEyed) and every other blog AnthroGeek writes I'm right there saying WOW me too! so that one wasn't a big shocker either. But Bethany and Becca????? I am STUNNED. I trusted you guys. From now on I'm keeping my eye on you guys ........teehee
Now as for the Who I should date ........ G, Manabrau.......Aye bay-bay how you doin? Wazup?
You should give it a go, I think it would be smashing to see what you get.
FYI I have never had a harder time making a link in my life as I did on this blog.They better finally work !
9:24 AM - Yeah that’s right it’s a blog about weather
Current mood: bummed
Category: Life
It’s the vernal equinox today YAY! I am ready for spring. This past winter sucked cheese.It was the same cycle over and over;
It snowed A LOT
I’m not sure why I have so many garbage cans
the up-down weather meant the kids had both bikes and sleds out in the same week ( and of coarse left both lying in the yard )
Then it would get cold
the river in the process of freezing ...pretty cool Huh!
Then it warmed up, the snow melted, and the river flooded.
Wash,rinse, repeat over and over.
I’m not the biggest fan of cold , but at least when it gets cold and stays cold you get used to it. People don’t live in an area with four seasons may find it hard to believe but you actually do get used to sub-freezing highs for the day. The first day it gets above freezing you’ll be standing there , coat open no hat or gloves, talking to the guy pumping gas across from you about how nice and warm it is today.
When it bounces up and down....over 40....negative 15.........hovering in the 30’s, not only don’t you adjust , but you get sick..REALLY sick. Colds, the flu, sinus and ear infections just keep bouncing around.I have hand sanitizer and Lysol scattered all through the house and hand washing has been policed like never before. We have been some of the lucky ones the only thing we had in my house was a sinus infection.
I have been counting down the days until Spring, literally checking them off one by one. I am ready for warmer weather.
blooming trees
birds chirping
flowers
tornadoes
( I’m weird like that)
The whole package.I was so excited that it was the official start of Spring and all this crap of this past winter was behind me ......until that damn weather bug started beeping.When I clicked on that blinking little weather warning icon I was expecting something along the lines of a thunderstorm warning, possibly a flood watch, but not what I saw. A FREAKING WINTER STORM WARNING! Thats right MORE SNOW, possibly 6+ inches. SSShhhiiiittttttt.I am stuck in the never ending winter from hell.
So.....what’s the weather been like where you are? Are you ready for Spring? For my friends on the other side of the globe, are you ready for Autumn ?
Come on rub in how wonderful it is where you are.I promise I’ll take it like a big girl and won’t pout, bitch, whine, moan or anything
5:10 AM - If I was any more efficient I would be a danger to myself
Current mood: ditzy
Category: Life
For the first time in.....I dunno how long I, all by myself, remembered when daylight savings time started. I decided to change all the clocks in my house before I went to bed last night before I forgot about the change and accidentally showed up somewhere early instead of being my usual 10 minutes late. Damn did I feel on the ball. After my usual four hours of blissful sleep I stumbled out of bed and started a pot of coffee,grabbed the remote, and turned on the T.V. to try and catch the weather.While I was in the laundry room digging for my socks in the dryer I heard the news anchor remind everyone that daylight savings time started today and not to forget to turn your clocks one hour ahead. Mental note made. After finding my socks and putting them on so more poor frozen toes wouldn't fall off I decided to go find something to eat. While my Pasta-Roni was cooking ( yeah thats right I had Pasta - Roni for breakfast ) I decided to make use of the time by........adjusting the clocks like the nice news anchor reminded me to. Anyone notice a problem yet? After I finished my time changing I sat in the living room to eat my noodles ( don't tell the kids I was eating in there Okay? ) and enjoy my quiet time before they all start waking up. I hit the program guide to see if there was anything good on the telly and noticed that the time was off, it was still an hour behind my newly adjusted clock time.I went to the menu to change the time, it had an automatic time set feature, but no manual that I could find.That fact is most likely to defend the poor satellite menu from people like me.I took my cell phone out of my purse so I could call customer service and find out how to change the time.When i opened the phone to make the call I noticed that my phones time was also off......hmm odd....damn technology, it never works right. I went through all the menu options to finally talk to a very nice service rep at Directv. She was puzzled by the fact that the time didn't change automatically like it should. After a few attempted tweaks on her end and the time not changing she decided the problem must be in the box itself and put in an order for a service call for either repair or replacement. Oh fun. After that was taken care of I moved on to trying to figure out how to change the time on my phone.I cruised through all the menus and all I found as far as time adjustment goes was a map where you set your region, nothing manual. Being as my region was already correct, and the time wasn't , I once again set forth on a call to customer service. This time the call was a lot shorter. I explained my problem to the rep, she explained how if it doesn't do it before a call is made, it definitely will do so after I use the phone to make or receive a call. I told her I had already used the phone to make a call and the time still said 6:10. ............Long pause......Then she said 'It is 6:10' in that tone, the one where you can tell it was taking all she had not to end that statement with the word DUMBASS. I, feeling soooooo pompous said ' It would be BEFORE the time change, but as it is the beginning of daylight savings time today...' She jumped in with ' Ma'am we are in the same time zone,the same state in fact. The time is most definitely 6:12, I watched all the clocks automatically adjust at 2a.m. to the time of 3a.m.' Suddenly I realized what I had done." I'm sorry my mistake' and I quickly hung up. back I went to changing the time on all my clocks.
That's how my day started. How is yours going?
.....and for no reason what so ever I decided to toss in a picture of the river at the e