NEW ART: COSMIC BEES
Category: Art and Photography

Helloo aall,

Here is my most recent piece, a metaphorical mixed media montage called "Cosmic Bees."





CLICK HERE TO SEE THE FULL-SIZED IMAGE.



As always, many thanks for your continued interest & support & kind words. Without lots and lots of attention, I would probably shrivel up like a raisin and stew in a tiny puddle of my own syrupy goo.

xo,
David

Currently reading : Nonviolence: 25 Lessons from the History of a Dangerous Idea (Modern Library Chronicles) By Mark Kurlansky Release date: 2006-09-12

12:21 PM - 13 Comments - 8 Kudos - Add Comment

WHAT IS SELF-AWARENESS? WHO IS THIS "I" PERSON, ANYWAY?
Category: Life

What does it mean to be self-aware? When we say, "I am me," is our brain having a conversation with itself? When we say, "is our brain having a conversation with itself?" do I mean that when I say, "When we say, 'I am me,'" what I really mean is, "I is us"? Who is this us, anyway? Is us me? Are we I?

Self-awareness is a natural byproduct of the interpretive function of the left hemisphere of the human brain making sense of the raw data processed by the information-gathering right hemisphere. For example, when my right hemisphere recognizes and identifies my reflection in a mirror (long curly hair, dark brown eyes, angular nose, goatee), my left hemisphere interprets the visual information and elaborates with a theory about the data processed (Yep! That's me all right! What's that smell?)

The left hemisphere of the brain interprets our responses to the world around us. It wonders how things relate to each other and forms theories about them. It creates order out of chaos. So when your right hemisphere collects data on a screaming madman rushing at you with a pair of scissors, your left hemisphere decides, "That guy has issues." When you come home from work and your right hemisphere recognizes a steamy pile of cat puke on the floor, your left hemisphere concludes, "I guess I'll eat out tonight."

As you read this, your right hemisphere is recognizing the words, "As you read this, your right hemisphere is recognizing the words," and your left hemisphere is interpreting the passage and hypothesizing, "David has too much time on his hands."

And when you read, "And when you read, 'As you read this, your right hemisphere is recognizing the words, 'As you read this, your right hemisphere is recognizing the words,' and your left hemisphere is interpreting the passage and hypothesizing, 'David has too much time on his hands,''" your left hemisphere may conclude, "David is just talking gibberish," or "David forgot to take his medication today." But that is nonsense. The most logical conclusions your left hemisphere could make from this written material are, "All fish are invisible," and "Giant otters are coming to get me."

So it is easy to see how a part of the brain that asks innumerable questions about the relationships between things and then effectively answers them could form the concept of self. The left hemisphere no doubt wonders who or what is conducting the Q & A and solving all these problems. It asks "Who are I?" and answers back, "I are us!"

To conclude: When we say, "I am me," what we really mean is, "You are all imaginary characters living inside my head. None of you really exist. Except for the giant otters."

Currently reading : Human: The Science Behind What Makes Us Unique By Michael S. Gazzaniga Release date: 2008-06-24

9:33 AM - 26 Comments - 19 Kudos - Add Comment

SOUR GRAPES AND AN ANCIENT MAN SEEKING ROMANCE ADVICE
Category: Life

It is a cool, quiet night here in Providence, Rhode Island. Mid-fifties, clear sky. Crickets are chirping. The faint, scattered rustling of leaves on the ground tells me that the neighborhood mice are searching for food. Last night, the air was thick and the sky was lively: a gorgeous full moon, obscured by legions of low, wispy clouds zipping silently overhead like ghosts.

* * * * * * * * *

I worked at the bookstore tonight, had an unpleasant phone conversation during my 15-minute dinner break, and felt rattled for the better part of an hour. I consoled myself with thoughts of getting home, drinking some wine, and drawing. The only question was: has Uncle Johnny's homemade Concord grape hooch turned to vinegar yet, or is the stuff still drinkable? I opened the bottle about four or five days ago. The last time I drank sour wine, my guts turned inside out and I wanted to die.

As soon as I got home, I pulled the green gallon jug from my fridge, sniffed the contents, and took a few cautious sips. The verdict? In the words of Frank Zappa: "Turn, turn, we're turning again!" My beloved hooch was on its way out. I cracked open a can of diet ginger ale, which I keep in store for when my parents come to visit. My antidote.

* * * * * * * * *

At work, an old man who looked about ninety approached the information desk for assistance. Tall, thin, neatly dressed. Moved like a marionette made of lead. His eyes honed in on me. He shuffled forward, slow but determined. He meant business. Slow business, yes, but business nonetheless.

"Hi! How can I help you?"

"Something something girl at the register something something help something something card something something pay for it?"

"Um, yes. Sure. What?"

"Something something my card something something look it up in your computer something something so I can buy a book?"

"Um. I—I'm not sure what I can do to help you."

"Something something my card something, because I don't pay attention to these details, something something look it up in your computer, something something something."

It took a few tries, but I finally got it. The guy left his gift card at home, and wanted to know if we could look it up so he could use it to buy a book while he was there. I informed him that we don't have the ability to look up someone's gift card on the computer. I apologized. I told him I wished I could help him.

"That's all right," he said as he left. "Thank you very much."

Then a tall, attractive, leggy young woman sporting a low, swooping neckline stepped up. She asked me for the follow-up book to the putrid and revolting frat boy favorite, I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell, a celebration of infantile, obnoxious, sexist behavior. I considered her for a moment and thought, You're really ugly.

About an hour later, the old man made his way back to the info desk.

"Do you have any books about relationships, or making a marriage work, or about being in a couple?" he asked.

"Sure! Right this way. Follow me."

I took him down one aisle and up another. We walked past the sex manuals and stopped at the relationships section. Teetering precariously on his well-worn legs, the old man marveled at how many relationships books there were. "Boy! There sure are a lot!" He soaked it all in, thought for a moment, and asked, "Can you recommend one that you've read?"

"Um," I said, and handed him a copy of Chicken Soup for the Couple's Soul. "I've never read this, but it's very popular. It's supposed to be really good. Otherwise, the best thing to do is just look a few over, see if there's something useful inside, and—"

"And spend the rest of your life trying to figure it out!" he said. We laughed.

* * * * * * * * *

I'm working on a new drawing, a pen and ink cartoon. It's angry and funny and good. It's drawn in the classic Dave style, replete with weirdly angled pants wrinkles and tightly knitted cross-hatching. Unfortunately, I'm using cheap bristol board, which means the ink bleeds on the surface. This crap paper is just one step above the cardboard they stuff into men's dress shirts at department stores. Oh, well. You get what you pay for.

I hope to have the new art finished in a couple of days. I'll post it when it's done. Stay tuned!

* * * * * * * * *

So what's going on in your life?

Currently reading : Snuff By Chuck Palahniuk Release date: 2008-05-20

1:33 PM - 22 Comments - 20 Kudos - Add Comment

FUCK ALL THAT & GOD BLESS
Category: News and Politics

Fuck terrorism. Fuck war. Fuck Al-Quaeda. Fuck the Religious Right. Fuck Hamas. Fuck the Republican Party. Fuck Osama Bin Laden. Fuck George Bush. Fuck "One Nation Under God." Fuck "My Country, Right or Wrong." Fuck the Pledge of Allegiance. Fuck the Patriot Act. Fuck the weapons manufacturers. Fuck the NRA. Fuck violence. Fuck survival of the fittest. Fuck self-righteousness. Fuck bigotry. Fuck ethnic cleansing. Fuck oppression. Fuck party rule. Fuck politicians. Fuck royalty. Fuck CEOs. Fuck corporate culture. Fuck television. Fuck gimme, gimme, gimme. Fuck mine, mine, mine.

God bless firefighters. God bless rescue workers. God bless nurses. God bless Doctors Without Borders. God bless relief workers. God bless charities. God bless non-profit organizations. God bless activists. God bless National Public Radio. God bless separation of Church and State. God bless Freedom of Speech. God bless religious tolerance. God bless Equal Rights. God bless Liberty and Justice for All. God bless democracy. God bless socialism. God bless evolution. God bless books. God bless libraries. God bless music. God bless art. God bless National Parks and National Forests. God bless people who can make you laugh. God bless children. God bless delicious food. God bless good conversation. God bless hugging. God bless kissing. God bless falling in love. God bless our tiny little planet.

1:55 PM - 26 Comments - 24 Kudos - Add Comment

NEW SONG: "WE WILL DESTROY YOU WITH OUR BEAUTY"
Category: Music

A throbbing, pulsing, rhythmic flood of life and love and power, steeped in the timeless cycles of the universe, infused with the endless echoes of night. Inspired by every music that's ever made me feel good about being myself.

Now posted on my music page. Go take a listen!

CLICK HERE TO HEAR.

Crazy wild love,
David

Currently listening : Passion Sources By Kudsi Erguner Release date: 1993-02-05

2:52 PM - 4 Comments - 4 Kudos - Add Comment

SPECIAL ANNOUNCEMENT - NEW PUBLISHED ART
Category: Art and Photography

Hello all,

I would like to share some good news with you, my beloved männer und frauen. A new political cartoon of mine now graces the cover of the highly esteemed, wildly unpredictable, genre-defying arts & literature magazine, ZYGOTE IN MY COFFEE. Here is what it looks like:



This is their print edition 5, a real, live magazine you can hold in your hands and flip through, and even smell and lick and eat, if that's what turns you on.

Support the arts! BUY THE NEW ISSUE OF ZYGOTE IN MY COFFEE HERE.You'll sleep better at night, and so will I.

Many thanks for everything,
David
xxxooo

Currently reading : How To Draw 101 Funny People (How to Draw)

2:02 PM - 28 Comments - 26 Kudos - Add Comment

SICK POLYSYLLABIC LIMERICK SCHTICK
Category: Writing and Poetry

Warning: Under no circumstances attempt to say this limerick with a mouth full of food, drink, or body parts!

***********************

There once was a man from Taumatawhakatangihangakoauauotamateapokaiwhenuakitanatahu

Who stirred a pan full of chocolate fondue

He mixed in some Methionylglutaminylarginytyrosylgluta-
mylserylleucylphenylalanylalanylglutaminylleucyllysylglutamyl-
arginyllysylglutamylglycylalanylphenylalanyvalylprolylphenyl-
alanylvalythreonylleucylglycylaspartylprolyglycylisoleucylgluta-
mylglutaminylserylleucyllysylisoleucylaspartylthreonylleucylisoleucylgluta-
mylalanylglycylalanylaspartylalanylleucylglutamylleucylglycylglycylisoleucyl-
prolylphenylalanylserylaspartylprolylleucelalanylaspartyglycylprolythreonyl-
isoleucylglutamiylasparaginylalanylthreonylleucylarginylalanylphenylalanyl-
alanylglycylvalyltheonylprolylalanylglutaminylcysteinylphenylalanygll-
utamylmethionylleucyalanylleucylisoleucylarginylglutaminyllysylhistidylpro-
lylthreonylisoleucylpriIylisoleucylglycylleucylleucylmethionyltyrosylalanylas-
paraginylleucylvalyphenylalanylasparaginyllysylgyycylisoleucylaspartylglut-
amylphenylalanyltyrosylalanylgutaminyllcysteinylglutamyllysylvalylglycylavlyl-
aspartylserylvalylleucylvalylalanylaspartylvalyprolylvalylglutaminylgluta-
myllserylalanyprolyphenylalanylarginylglutaminylalanylalanylleucylarginylhis-
tidylasparaginylvaylalanylprolylisoleucylphenylalanylisoleucylcysteinylproly-
lprolylaspartylalanylaspartylaspartylaspartylleucylleucylarginyglutam-
inylisoleucylalanyylseryltyrosylglycylarginylglycyltyrosylthreonyltyrosylleucyl-
leucylser-ylarginylalanylglycylvalythreonylglycylalanylglutamylasparaginylarg-
inylanylalanylleucylprolylleucylaspaaginylhistidylleucylvaylalanyllysylleucyl-
lysylglutamyltyrosylasaraginylglycylphenylalanylglycylisoleucylalanylprolyl-
aspartylglutaminylvalyllysylalanylalanylisoleucylaspartylalanylalanyglycyla-
lanylalanyglycylalanylisoleucylserylglycyseryla-lanylisoleucylbalyllsylisoleu-
cylisoleucylglutamylglutaminylhistidylasparaginylisoleucylglutamylproly-
glutamyllysylmethionylleucylalanylalanylleucyllysylvalylphenylalaby-
lvalylglutaminlylprolylmethionyllysylalanylalanylthreonylarginylserine

That was tainted with Acetylseryltyrosylserylisoleucylthreonyl-
serylprolylserylglutaminylphenylalanylvalylphenylalnelleucylseryl-
serylvalyotriptophylalanylaspartylprolylisoleucylglutamylleucyllencyllaspara-
ginylvalylcysteinythreonylserylserylleucylglycllasparatinylglutaminyl-
phenylalanylglutaminylthreonylglutaminylglutaninylal-
anylarginylthrseonylthreonylglutaminylvalylglutaminyglutaninylphenylalanyl-
serylghlutaminylvalyltryptophyllysylrolylphenylalaylprolyglutaminylseryl-
threonylvalylarginylphunylalanylprolylglycylaspartylvalyltyrosyllsvslvalyltyro-
sylargiyltyosvlasparaginylalanylvalylleusylaspartylprolylleucylisole-
ucylthreonylalnylleucylleucylglycyltreonylphnylalanylaspartylthreonylarginla-
sparaginylarginylisoleucylislleucylglutammylvalylglutamylasparaginylglut-
aminylglutaminylsurylprolylthreonylthreonylalanyoglutamylthreonylleucyl-
aspartylalanylthreonylarginylarginylvalylaspartylaspartylalanylthreonylvalyl-
alanylisoleucylarginylserylalanylasparaginylisoleucylasparaginylleucylvall-
asparaginylglutamylleucylvalylarginylglycylthreonylglycylleucyltyrosylaspara-
ginylglutaminylasparaginylthreonylphenylalanylglutamylserylmethionylseryl-
glycylleucylvalyltryptophylthreonylserylalanylprolylalanylserine

And turned it into Belgian beef stew!

***********************

Sesquipedally yours,
David
xo

Currently reading : The Elements of Style, Fourth Edition By William Strunk Jr.

9:27 AM - 22 Comments - 18 Kudos - Add Comment

WE WILL DESTROY YOU WITH OUR BEAUTY
Category: Life

You, in your top floor offices, in your penthouse suites, in your marble fortresses, in your armored limousines,

We are the little people. We are the huddled masses, the lower classes, the workhorses, the labor forces, the unwashed, unclean, undesirable, ungrateful, undeserving underlings who walk beneath your feet and toil in your shadows. You look down on us like ants, you trample on us like dirt, you ride on our backs like mules. We do your dirty work and you profit off our blood.

You are stupid and greedy and evil and wrong.

Beware! You are The Few but we are The Many. You have guns and money and police and soldiers and lawyers and judges, but we have strength in numbers. You pull our strings and yank our chains, but we will bite the hands that choke us. You have tried to keep us in line, but lines were meant to be crossed and erased. You have tried to put us in our place, but our place is everywhere. The time is nigh. We will swarm and sting, we will rise up and roll over you like a thousand tidal waves.

We will destroy you with our Beauty. We are a billion blazing suns, we are lightning in the night, we are the unstoppable throb and pulse of Life. We have herds and hives and tribes and vibes. Though you try to pave over us, we will grow back like flowers in the cracks. Though you try to mow us down, we will rise up like a trillion blades of grass. We will remain steadfast, like the tallest trees reaching for heaven. Our deep roots will burrow underground and break through the foundations of your ugly monuments to greed. We will come together in song and dance and art, our bodies will mesh together and move with beat of tribal drums, our love will swell like the ocean, our spirits will soar, we will become as One, and we shall overcome.

9:38 AM - 22 Comments - 20 Kudos - Add Comment

NEW AUDIO COLLAGE POSTED ON MY MUSIC PAGE
Category: Music

Hello all,

I posted new audio collage montage mélange on MY MUSIC PAGE.

It's called SUMMER SWIRL. Please give it a listen and let me know what you think.

*********************

Cosmic hiss bliss
Velvet petal kiss
Miss reminisce
Free form sea foam
Ebb and flow home
Metaphor tome
Buzz of love hum
Itchy green thumb
Some Summer sum

*********************

CLICK HERE TO HEAR!

12:15 PM - 2 Comments - 2 Kudos - Add Comment

REALITY BITES, AMERICAN HEROES, TASTE THIS, ETC.
Category: Life

I.) INTRODUCTION

First of all, let me say at the outset, before I go off on anything else, that I think my head is going to pop. I already popped something else inside me recently. Now my brain is going to burst like a seed pod, casting forth its germs of thoughts to the four winds.

I know I'm reaching a bit with those metaphors. But I like to reach. That's what I do. I like to stand, precariously balanced on my tiptoes in a tight spot, stretch as far as I am able, and reach for the highest fruit. I like to catch things that are hard to get, hold them close, and see what they really look like.

I also like to dig for buried treasure, but that's a whole other thing of things.

It's 11:44 pm. I'm sitting here typing in a small corner of my living room, which is decorated with religious kitsch and artsy ephemera. There's lots of red in my living room. I'm sipping a summer ale, thinking about what I'm thinking about, stringing words together like a beaded necklace. I barely notice the slow roll of car tires down my street, or the clink and clank of neighbors sorting their glass recyclables for tomorrow's trash pickup.

That reminds me, I have to put out the trash. I'll be right back.


(Intermission)


Whee! That was fun! I feel spiritually enriched. Now, let's get to the topics of today's blog.


II.) REALITY BITES

Why is life so unfair? Why can't we get what we want? Why do we suffer? Is this all some kind of cruel joke? What the hell is up with Crocs?

I often have a zen-like acceptance of everything. Whatever will be, will be. You can't change the weather, you can only dress appropriately for it. Sometimes, we still get wet and cold. It rains on the just and the unjust. That's life. Sun is good, and rain is also good. What matters most is not what you get, but what you do with what you get. Bring an umbrella, and have fun splashing in puddles!

But sometimes I stubbornly refuse to accept things I don't like. I become attached to a preconceived idea of something, rather than accepting the reality of it. I obsess. I get anxious. Part of me is still that naive little kid, thinking that if I just wish something hard enough, it will come true. Goddamned stupid "patron saint of lost causes" St. Jude Catholic bullshit.

Perfectionism—it can push you to higher heights, or it can cripple you for life. Sometimes, I want to keep drawing and redrawing a picture until it comes out perfect. It never does. All I get is frustration. Life is messy, and we are messy.

I don't know what the deal is with Crocs, but they are quite simply the ugliest shoes in the universe.

III.) AMERICAN HEROES

There's a new book out called Generation Kill. It's about the American troops in Iraq. The back of the book says they became heroes in an age when there were no heroes. They're risking their lives to defend our freedoms. They're fighting terrorists and bringing democracy to Iraq. They're making the world a safer place.

I think I'm going to puke.

The war is wrong, wrong, wrong. Saddam Hussein did not support the 9/11 terrorists. There were no weapons of mass destruction. We are making a bloody mess in Iraq.

Every time I see a man or a woman in desert camos, I cringe.

Let me make this clear: I do not wish harm upon our troops. I wish them love and peace. I wish them a safe passage home.

That being said: the soldiers in Iraq are not my heroes. Our troops are not blameless victims of the Bush regime's gross misconduct. We have a volunteer military. And they are doing evil men's dirty work in a filthy war.

Fuck hero worship. Be your own hero.

IV.) TASTES

As I get older, I continue to grow. My taste in things are always evolving. It's great to be able to appreciate new types of music, film, and art that I previously disregarded or disliked. When I was in my twenties, I hated jazz and abstract expressionism. Now I own lots of Miles Davis CDs and get into swirly swooshes on canvas.

I still hate Billy Joel, though. Some things always suck.

V.) STRAGGLERS

If you are one of those people who linger in a store or a restaurant until after closing, and then leave a horrific mess for the underpaid, under-appreciated staff to clean up, I hope you get an uncontrollable case of diarrhea while stuck in rush hour traffic. I hope you soil yourself with a volcanic eruption of fiery, liquid stool, in 90 degree heat, with no air conditioning, in total gridlock. You make other people's lives more difficult and unpleasant than necessary, and there is no excuse for your selfish, inconsiderate behavior. Go stew in molten poop.

VI.) BOOKS TO READ BEFORE YOU DIE

That was the headline of an AOL news story this week. Being a bookish type of guy, I took notice. "Don't be the dunce who doesn't know about these," AOL said. "10 you shouldn't miss." My heart raced. Could it be that America Online was actually promoting literacy?

Well, kind of. Sort of.

I clicked on the link. I saw the books: Wuthering Heights. The DaVinci Code. The Stand. Harry Potter. Lord of the Rings. And so on. With two or three exceptions, it was all pop culture, mass market stuff. Silly me, I was expecting more examples of the greatest achievements in Western literature, like Macbeth and Moby Dick and The Old Man and the Sea. Maybe some Maya Angelou, some Alice Walker, some Kurt Vonnegut. What the hell was I thinking? I must be a dummy.

Please excuse me. I'll go sit myself in a corner, put on a dunce cap, and read this silly book about evolutionary neuroscience.

VII.) EPILOGUE

It's now 3 am. I can't believe I stayed up this late. I need to get some sleep. I wonder who else is still up right now?

xoxoxo,

David

Currently reading : Human: The Science Behind What Makes Us Unique By Michael S. Gazzaniga Release date: 2008-06-24

9:30 AM - 42 Comments - 22 Kudos - Add Comment