3:50 PM - sky wonders

starving sunlight echoes here

radiates my greatest fear

fallen star of broken mass

whispers over lush green grass

a wind that blows the trees away

boughs that rip through my dismay

crumbled moon of stolen light

take me away on your midnight flight

soundless wonders of my heedless brain

on this leaf where my soul is lain

comet, in your dusty path

seek a soul who seeks my wrath

                       *jenny.g.*

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1:10 PM - poem

http://blog.myspace.com/mayabymichaeljbernard

go to this site to see a poem of mine, published by maya! other than just my poem though, there are also some kick ass other poems for your viewing pleasure.

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12:25 AM - strangled

i got my dignity wrapped around my neck

strangling all the wisdom from me

wrapping around my voice

taking all the power from me

clasping to this tiny hope

this insecurity falls around me

got my pain falling within me

keeping all the wisdom from me

                           *jenny.g.*

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12:12 AM - i’m here

are you there god? do you exist god? where are you god? cause i'm here god. i'm waiting god. i'm missing you god.

sometimes i think i wasted my life believing in you god.

are you there god? where are you god? did you forget me god? cause i'm here god. i'm standing here god.

did you leave me god? are you up there god? i need you god. in my life, i am waiting.

what happened to you god? where did you go god? i'm here god. i'm waiting god.

will you bless me for all i have done?  will you bless me for all i haven't done? what i wanted so bad to do. will you be there god?

i'm here god. i'm so lonely god. i dont feel you anymore god. i dont know what i believe anymore god. i'm so lonely god.

where did you go god? did you forget us god? what did i do so wrong god? are you there god? do you exist god? are you up there god?

cause sometimes i dont think you are.

sometimes god, i dont know where you went.

where are you god? where did you go god? i'm right here god. right here god. where i always was. where i always will be.

i'm right here god.

when we're dead, when all around is finished, will i be with you god? or will i burn my soul to dust in a place lost without you?

all because a piece of me couldn't see you in all the hate around me. will you be there god? where are you god?

in all the pain i see, to all the people around me, to all the people i love, a peice of me cant find the time to believe in you.

where are you god? i'm right here god. i always will be.

                  *jenny.g.*

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9:49 PM - ladybird

blanket over soul of dust

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3:12 PM - heart

the mutability of my beating heart beats a step i thought i've taken

weary on this broken ladder, my hands stretch out for life not shaken

and finds a rung that splinters, shakes and breaks within me

listless body, i fall away and shield my heart from slow churned agony

                                      *jenny.g.*

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12:56 AM - unconsciousness

cause you

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5:42 PM - a place

i said i know it.

i said that once i lost my way and went through hell.

i said i could show it.

i said i could lead the way to the edge from which i fell.

and from here you could look down and see my face.

from here you could drop into my treacherous place.

and from here you could see what i was living.

from here you could see there was nothing worth giving.

and from here you could have a tiny taste.

from here you could see that life was just a waste.

                     *jenny g.*

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9:05 PM - fleeting courage

prodigiously complex spiderwebs, long lived, they hang from the sky

tumbling their smooth long fingers over my wondering eye

the fingers, they grip to my shoulder, hold me in place as we fly

i wonder if they ever stopped squeezing, would i fall to the ground from so high

                                      *jenny g.*

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7:17 AM - a light inside that hides

it protrudes out of my face, this mask of indescribable pain,

the summoned cleansing of my heart begins as it obeys.

on this table of broken wood, where all the hatred is lain,

of a world tumbling through the hell of its own evil ways.

this is not the time to walk away from all we have been given here,

this is the time to pray to release the fear and pain.

to release the angry hatred that is the sullen clothes we wear,

and to be able to walk through life without the evil stain.

in a world turning cold and grey, it spins beneath our feet,

faces filled with quiet dismay walk with the pity they see.

stooped, they hold the weight of life as though they have been beat,

and instead of fighting for their right, scared they turn and flee.

on this lonely path, sits hunched up souls waiting for their lives to be told,

silent in their remorseful lives, they do not know the way they go.

clutched inside is a hidden light, the power to a life that they could hold,

and with only prayer and faith, the power they have would grow.

                                                                     *jennyleianne* 

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7:19 AM - forever in a dream

sweet, succulent dream outside my mind

i release all things inside that i can not seem to find

and with this joy i release the knotted bind

the hazy smoke of grasping truth begans to slowly clear

and startled eyes come into view, with love they boldly wear

green and round with shocking desire they give and proudly bear

my heart beats deep within my labored chest

a racing, steady beat that thumps into my breast

and i take his hand of gracious love to follow on this anxiously awaited quest

i recommence my stumbling breath, in a throat clenched with dry anticipation

and i swallow the love you send to me, a fiery path to a stomach in need of sustentation

that follows its way to my beating heart, that floats as though it has lost all gravitation

sweet, forever reality, a dream outside my mind

with a world of anger and sadness i now leave forever behind

i grasp your hand and with this love, our future we leave to find.

                                                 *jennyleianne*

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6:57 PM - the thief

the clumsy thief of indignation stole my one forgotten hope.

i stare about with resignation and with this sadness i try to cope.

fallen down like old brown leaves, broken below his righteous shoes,

i stare around this cautious world, looking about for hiding clues.

with empty curiousity the world tints to faded grey.

and silent to my broken vows, to this thief, it does not betray.

filled inside with retreating remorse from this place i turn and flee.

this land, this place of pungent anger, is not a place i care to be.

                                                           *jennyleianne*

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7:00 AM - the devils land

my hand aches. it reaches to you. it holds your fingers, nimble and strong, within a grip i can not control.

as we ride our horse through the devils red land, thorns peirce my skin with the tainted hatred of many men. i keep my grip. i do not let go.

my feet trip through the thick brown sand that clutches at my swollen ankles. i pull you through, i grip you tight. i hold your hand with all my might.

i carry you to a new found place. i rest you on the angels feet with shoes of solid gold.

i grip your hand. i grip it tight. i do not ever let go. i pull you up from hell below, into the angels green lush land.

i grip your hand. i hold it tight. i will not ever let go.

 i will keep holding on until forever ends.

                                                    *jennyleianne*

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3:03 PM - camouflage of a coward

she flits through life. she covers her bones with insouciant skin; a crawling cover, a knowing disguise.

scratch the surface of her habitual cloak, you'll find an insecure core, intuitive to the ways of the wise.

she goes forth with need, in seeking request, each step she takes a print of hazy trepidation.

her impenetrable skin made by angry gestures, screams of her pounding declamation.

all acts that shout of her insignificance to the world, through acts the world could never forget.

her sadness seeps forth, a collection of rot in her bones, strong in the life she has met.

like an emanation of malevolence around her, forming an aura that destroyed her own beating heart.

brought down by the self-immolation that took her by the core and ripped her apart.

she believed everything she would ever need is what she found in you.

she forgot the bright passion of the moment did not matter once the moment was passed; she forgot that the life that you showed her was never true.

                                            *jennyleianne*

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8:53 AM - the mind of my soul

these sins of my self, they are created from an amorphous being that rest in a line, long and dark, entering the shadows of my soul.

the skeletal finger of fear pushes down on me from hell, creating in my spirit places of infuriation and agony, sharp like needled holes.

this phantom of malody squats among my body, like a palpable being screaming words into my ears.

and all the rest i define with knowing touch, excuses of this clenching lust that dominates my hollow fears.

a tainted self, a tortured soul that eats alive my shaking bones till all thats left is what rests inside.

and from these testimonies of defiled men come lies that deteriorate from the saliva on their tongues to all the prayers that they confide.

holding up a simple light that makes the way for trusting lovers to pass on by.

to this i sit and watch, shackled to the walls of cursed pain, hatched from forbidden need, and to this my ugly face lowers to the ground and i cry.

                                *jennyleianne*

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