Watching T-Pain, Luda, and Rick Ross on the BET awards, I identified with a high that was all too familliar--almost like a worship experience. Both the artists and the audience closed their eyes, shook their heads as if they had transported to another place. And in an form of outward expression of pleasure and honor, they. . . lifted their hands.
I know the feeling, but in a different context.
I've always said this, and it's constantly being confirmed. We were made to lift our hands.We were made to worship and give honor as moved by music which comes from the Author of sound. Some use it to glorify the King, others to glorify things that displease Him. But regardless of its purpose, its effect is the same: A lifting of the hands, closing of the eyes and a trasnportation to a world outside of our present.
We can all worship...but we are not all transported to the same place. I bet my life that whre i'm going is much more profitable than the other place...where are you going?
I think I might be in-love with Him, actually. I stay crushin'. Wondering about what He's thinking about. Upset if I don't know. Displeased if I can't be with Him. Disheartened if I don't please Him. Thinking of ways I can express my love for Him. Do the dishes without my mom asking just to let my Lover know, I want to honor Him by obeying Him.
And I so desire to love like Him, though I believe it's impossible. (I'm human and I have expectations) But when I think of my Daddy and His foolishness.. . .I blush. I'm humbled and it makes me want to show others that same love. That acceptance. That grace. My heart beats for the unsaved. Hmm...I don't mean to connote "people who are going to hell"..Jesus is Judge..I mean...the lost, the orphaned.. . the people who don't know Him. Who don't get His Heart because pharisees have told them they were unacceptable. (ouch. . .)
It hurts. Were we not manufactured by the same company? Though, only a few wear His Brand.(You gotta get filled for that.). But nonetheless, we've been made by the same Hands. If we knew our Daddy's mind towards the 'sinner', we'd love 'em as much as He does...if we could. The people we've dismissed in our minds are the the ones He died for.
I want to love like Jesus.
I know many who operate in signs and wonders. This is great. It's a testimony of Jesus' Ressurection. But as Paul said, you can do all these things, but if you have not love it's just entertainment. It's empty. Loving people (regardless of their beliefs) is a testimony of Jesus' Death. And to love them does not mean to endorse...there is a clear demarcation between darkness and light...but when we were in darkness, He became a light and brought us into Himself.. .
As I was writing in my journal, I discovered myself, or perhaps a piece of self I had known but had not come to grips with. In this moment I recieved answers which for me, only lead to more questions. Inconsolable, I know.
Reality is I have a slight control problem, and a major patience problem. I want things to happen. . . NOW. And for me, now is not the duration of the present which could exist into eternity. But NOW is....NOW. A man challenged me to hurry and do all G_d had for me before I got too old. He was about to turn thirty and he was determined to publish and get things done before his 30th. Said we don't have time to waste. It ignited striving because I then felt ashamed. Like I wasn't doing anything for Jesus. I began to resent school because it was in the way of my ...calling? I wasn't doing me, like He called me to. I felt behind, delayed.
But as I writing the other day, I remembered Gen 18: 10, 14 and Gen. 21. God told Abe and Sara that He will return according to the time of life and Sarah will birth a child. Isaac came according to the time of life.
God is in control. I guess in my mind, Life and G_d were two seperate entities? Or maybe I thought life existed outside of G_d? Or G_d was in control of life? I dunno....But it became apparent to me that G_d is Life. Duh! (John 6:48) All life is, is Time, and Time is G_d. A friend of mine told me the other day that purpose does not exist for time...Time exists for purpose.
G_d's plans are not for nought. There's a process of living and learning. failing and succeeding, exalting and humilating. Even Jesus had to learn obedience in His time of life...and according to the time of life His ministry began. And at the appointed time, He was taken to the cross. They had wanted to kill him before then, but the Bible says,"His time had not yet come". The paradox of it all is we have time, but time is short. Ha! Perhaps we should abide in the Author of Time and flow with Him...wherever He goes. Afterall, only He can get us there on time.
I was attending a service in the UK, as a short, burly preacher appoached the pulpit and told the congregation that he was going to talk to us about OVERCOMING. He said, he was going to teach us how to get the VICTORY..and the crowd excitedly woo hooed, and shouted for joy. And he said, "the first step to overcoming is....EXPECT OBSTACLES" The crowd grew silent. Yeah, not exactly what you want to hear right? But he made it plain, that we can't hide from Marshall's Law, and instead of praying them away, we ought to embrace them. How else can you claim victory?
I find myself now, expecting adversity. Expecting opposition and praying that God will help me to learn from these situations what I can. I find myself thankful for what I've gone through because it helps me identify with others who've gone through the same thing. I laugh at my foolishness to think that opposition was never in my best interest. And when you think about it...it always is, even when it's not intentional.
The preacher man said today that the path of holiness is paved by adversity. I like that. If it means, it makes me more like the One who came before me...if it means I can look my enemis in the eye and say forgive 'em Dad. They don't got a clue! then bring it on. I'm trying to be a reflection of my Husband, the Lover of my being.
it begins, a little flame for your consideration. a seed of opposition to the pre-established truth a mere insinuation of your greatest fears an illusion of dark possibilities or unpleaseant realities but regardless of the nature, it seems best to choke the embryo of doubt when it begins to form a little bit of oxygen gives life to evil seed and without breath, then death can no longer breathe may the ephemeral perish by the scorching of the Light may it dry up and wither until it fades away and after the notions are erased, may only His Word remain a little flame for your consideration
A friend of mine and I were reading in Gen about the creation story and I realized while reading...before the fall, we were born with the Holy Spirit!
Gen 2:7 And the Lord God formed man of the dust of the ground and breathed into his nostrils the breath of llife and man became a living being
The word breath is Ruach, which is also the word for Spirit. So God breathed Himself into man’s vessel and we lived full of him (.and we still chose against Him..geesh!). I was watching an episode of Everybody Loves Raymond about why we exist. Robert asks why the fruitfly lives only a day, what’s his purpose, hunh? Debra says that only humans can think to ask that question. And that’s it. This mind. This intellect...While it’s a blessing..it gets in the way! So much so that Eve, full of God’s Spirit was easily deceived.
Oh the great battles that we suffer in our mind’s playground. Such that when the spirit...the ideas of heaviness come, it weighs us down so much, we can barely lift our bottom lip to speak. haha..that’s what the psalmist said. My heart’s so heavy, I can’t speak...but here’s the beauty of the grace found in the story of Redemption. When Jesus died and rose again, we got to inhale His Spirit once again...and with this Breath we can speak life. Why is it, when the mind is bothered, the mouth is closed. It seems such an arduous task to say "Thank you Jesus" when the mind is distracted with illusions...Perhaps this is why regardless of the power of the Spirit that already resides in us...it’s our minds that need to be renewed. But glory be to God, that out of our mouths proceed sharp swords to war against the lies that hoover over us...Your mouth is important and if you carry the Ruach of the Most High then open up your mouth .
What will I write about now? So many things brewing in this mind of mine.
Refuse the evil, and choose the good
An interesting Diety we serve, who commands worship, but gives you the option to refuse. That's why religion does not work. It does not give you options, it just gives you law. It gives us rules. And God saw that men followed the rules, but "our hearts were afar off". It's the matter of the heart, because whatever we desire...we will choose. And Abba wants us to desire Him, so that we would choose Him.
In Isaiah 7: 15 the prophet says the Son of God will learn to refuse the evil and choose the good, which says to me that the Son of Man had to practice making the right choice. It says, He had to learn obedience. And to obey God is to refuse what displeases Him, and choose Him. I had a friend who was open with me about his struggles with sin. He felt like he couldn't break his addiction to sex. He asked me "What do I do?" and I could only look at him and tell him..."As powerful as God's Spirit is, He has given us the power of choice, so you must choose". He said, his own strength failed him. He couldn't do it. He is correct as we can do nothing right in and of ourselves. But we can choose to refuse. Meanwhile, God empowers us to resist. It's a matter of practicing. Make it a habit.
The option is yours: refuse Him?..or refuse sin? and let His Spirit cause you to resist.
My problem is I try to understand a God who is incomprehensible. In a way, I can’t help it. He made me that way. And my passion to know Him is ultimately driven by my desire to love Him. But I’ve come to conclude that while I love Him, I don’t believe I can ever understand Him. Who can know the mind of God...except the Spirit...and the Spirit reveals things...but even then, I only know in part. I’ve accepted it. It is well with my soul. And I celebrate in the fact that God’s way of doing things are not simply antithetical, but technically irrational as compared to human rationalization. And the fact that He would choose me packaged with my struggles, my weaknesses and limitations to do the things He’s calling me to do...seems a little nonsensical. Me? Really? With a PhD?
Not that I’m not smart. Not that I’m not driven. But I’ve committed my ways to the Lord and who would have thought I’d be where I am today? Not even Princess herself. But I’m glad to have the liberty to say, Yes, His ways are not our ways, and His thoughts are far removed from our thoughts. His folly is even wiser than man’s wisdom. And I am His foolishness.
I remember the day it hit me. I was on my dorm room floor in tears thinking..."Are you Serious????" Like, is this for real? Who does this? What sense does that make? How in the world does anybody LOVE that hard???
I’m telling you, I was dumbfounded when I realized that such a Holy Divine Being would stoop Himself so low to demonstrate His committment to a people who reject Him..even after they praised Him with their lips, but their hearts were far away from Him. Even after He got them out of bondage and they complained and honored a man-made god. He says that even if you were once wicked, when you turn to me, I’ll treat you like yo’ve always been righteours...That’s...That’s Grace, ya’ll...It’s the Gospel of Jesus Christ. It’s...killin’ me.
This neverending compassion that God has for His Creation. The fact that when we are FAITHLESS, He is still Faithful. Like Wow...
That was six years ago, and you would think I’d get over it, but everytime I think about it, I’m humbled that He would consider fussy ol’ me...That He had made provision for me since before I came into existence....OMG!!! Man, that’s beyond nice...it’s...divine. I’m sorry, I’m just rambling on...Ressurection Sunday is comin’ and it reminds me, not only about the sacrifie, but God’s Insanity! ahaha...to Commit Himself to a broken world and say I’ll love you even if it Kills Me"
whew...how am i going to write this. there's so much to say. and i've been thinking on this for many years now. i'm sure it's quite simple. an age old truth. cuz nothin's new under the sun. . .but this truth always seems new to me. Just like the Good News...everytime I hear it, it's like i'm hearing it for the first time.
In my earlier blog, I wrote about being tarnished by our local context. Holding dual confessions because of what we see. Because we've become sensual beings and have need to touch, taste, smell, and see....that the Lord is for us. But faith requires much more of us. And because we are constantly bombarded with our surroundings we must take steps to keep our minds stayed on Him.
One of three favorite scenes in the Pasion of Christ is when Jesus is praying in the garden. Though he's communing with his Father, Satan is there speaking everything contrary to what is true but nonetheless consistent with what things appear to look like. But what I love about this scene is Jesus looks up...and in tears continues to speak to His Father. He's aware of the prescence of darkness, but he keeps His eyes on the prize set before Him...He looks to the Father and ignores the lies. Doesn't give it any attention.
I believe the only time we need to speak to the enemy is when we are giving commands. But generally I don't converse with evil. There's no need. Ignore ignorance. Reject the lies and keep your eyes on the prize...set before you. Check it out...at 1:16.
But he made it plain, that we can't hide from Marshall's Law, and instead of praying them away, we ought to embrace them. How else can you claim victory?
artistic
grateful