FAT
Current mood: bummed

OMG!!!  If I don't lose some weight I won't be able to fit out my front door soon!  I quit smoking 6 months ago and have started to eat like it is my last meal.  I am not real sure how long you can use the , " I just quit smoking" card, before people stop saying "oh, I can understand that" , to them thinking.  Look you fat bitch put the damn little debbie down and do a jumping jack or two.   Jumping jacks aren't good for fat people, they are really bad an the joints and other peoples eye sight.  Any way That is what I am complainig about today.  Probably tomorrow too.

7:47 PM - 6 Comments - 9 Kudos - Add Comment

THAT IS PRETTY PATHETIC
Current mood: determined

OKAY- I HAVE A SERIOUS BONE TO PICK.  I JUST WENT TO A FRIENDS PAGE- B. BRIZZLE OF COURSE- AND SAW HIS FRIEND M. BRIZZLE.  WHICH HAPPENS TO BE HIS DOG MAX.  I HAVE NEVER BEEN TO HIS PAGE, SO I CLICKED ON THE CUTE PIC OF MAX.  TO MY HORROR I SEE THAT MAX HAS 84 FRIENDS.  IN CASE YOU ALL DID NOT NOTICE I HAVE 19 OR 18.  I AM VERY THANKFUL FOR ALL OF MY FRIENDS AND LOVE YOU ALL FOR DIFFERENT QUALITIES THAT YOU HAVE, BUT FOR THE LOVE OF GOD......84!

THE DOG MIGHT BE CUTER THEN ME, AND OBVIOUSLY HAS BETTER HAIR.  BUT I THINK I WOULD CARRY ON A BETTER CONVERSATION, AT TIMES ANYWAY.

WELL YOU GO M-BRIZZLE.  I OFFERED MY FRIENDSHIP TO YOU AND I CAN ONLY HOPE YOU WILL ACCEPT.

5:55 PM - 11 Comments - 10 Kudos - Add Comment

DATE WITH DRENNEN

I NEED A ME DAY, OR NIGHT.  MY HUSBAND AND I HAD A COUPLE OF BABYSITTERS FOR OUR TWO KIDS, MY MOM FOR MY SON AND MY BEST FRIEND FOR MY DAUGHTER.  WE HAD BIG PLANS TO GO TO A PLAY AND HAVE A NICE DINNER, JUST THE TWO OF US.  OF COURSE AS ALL YOU PARENTS OUT THERE KNOW THESE DATES ARE FEW AND FAR BETWEEN.  WHEN THE DATE DAY CAME I REALLY HAD NO DESIRE AT ALL TO GO TO THE PLAY OR OUT TO EAT.  I WANTED TO HAVE FUN.  JUST BE ME WITH A LITTLE HELP FROM MY GOOD FRIEND BUD (LIGHT).
I CALL ONE OF MY GOOD FRIENDS B-BRIZZLE TO SEE IF HE HAD A HOT DATE THAT NIGHT.  HE IS IN AGREEMENT TO ACCOMPANY ME AS LONG AS WE GO SOMEWHERE HE CAN HAVE COFFEE AND SMOKE.  BY THE WAY I HAVE GONE A WEEK- NO CIGS-YEAH!
MY HUSBAND IS IN CAHOOTS WITH ME TO NOT GO ON THE DATE.  WHICH NOW THAT I THINK ABOUT IT IS KINDOF WEIRD.  I MEET BRIZ AT WORK.  CLIFF IS THERE (IF YOU DON'T KNOW CLIFF, YOU NEED TO GO TO FLYCROOKED.COM AND READ SOME OF THE BLOGS ON THAT SITE- SOME GOOD BLOGGING- MY FRIEND BRIZZLE IS THE WRITER AND HE IS VERY TALENTED)  THIS GUY IS ABOUT 5'2", AND HAS A THING FOR ME (WELL EVERY WOMEN HE MEETS THAT HE HAS YET TO HAVE).  THE THING THAT REALLY MAKES ME LAUGH IS THAT I AM 6'1"!  I MEAN COULD YOU IMAGINE?  NOW REALLY THAT IS SOME FUNNY SHIT.

CLIFF BEGINS TO TELL ME HOW GREAT I LOOK. BRIZZLE IS ROLLING HIS EYES AND WE ARE BOTH LAUGHING AT CLIFFS EXPENSE.  I THINK CLIFF LIKES THE ATTENTION.

SO BRIZZ AND I LEAVE WORK AND HEAD OUT TO SPRING STREET LIVE (AS A WISE MAN I KNOW CALLS IT)TO HAVE A GOOD TIME.  A FRIEND OF BRIZZS SHOWS UP, AND BLESS HER LITTLE HEART SHE IS STUCK WITH ME AS A FRIEND.

WE ARE HAVING FUN.  I DRANK JUST ENOUGH FOR BRIZZ TO SAY SOMETHING A LITTLE TO FUNNY AT THE RIGHT TIME, AND WOULDNT YOU KNOW IT BEER THOUGH THE NOSE!!!!
IT IS LATE SO THE FRIEND LEAVES AND BRIZ AND I STAY A WHILE AND CHAT. 
I BEGIN TO TALK TO BRIZ ABOUT MY SON.  I HAVE HAD PROBLEMS EVER SINCE HE WAS BORN.  I HAD POST-PARTOM DEPRESSION AFTER HE WAS BORN (YES TOM THERE IS SUCH A THING, AND YOU CAN KISS MINE AND BROOKS ASS).  THEN HE HAD COLIC.  I ALSO HAD A 21 MONTH OLD BABY AS WELL.  I MUST HAD BEEN NUTS.  DRENNEN HAS SOME BEHAVIOR THAT LEAVES ALOT TO BE DESIRED.  I AM VENTING THIS TO BRIZ.
HE BEGINS TO TELL ME SOME STORIES ABOUT HIM AND HIS SON.  THE PARENTING WAYS THAT HE FOUND TO WORK WITH HIS SON.  I AM A SPONGE TRYING TO ABSORB ALL THE INFO I CAN FROM THIS MAN WHO HAS BEEN IN MY SHOES.  BY THE END OF THE EVENING I AM TEARFUL AND SAD.  I HAVE DONE MY BABY WRONG IN SO MANY WAYS AND MY FRIEND HELPED ME TO SEE THE LIGHT.

HE SUGGESTED THAT I GO OUT AND TALK WITH DRENNEN,  JUST HIM AND ME.  THAT WEEKEND I TOOK MY LITTLE HANDSOME, SWEET, LOVING, AMAZING, FORGIVING, GENEROUS, FUNNY, HYPER, POLITE & SHY SON ON HIS FIRST DATE.  MY HUSBAND GAVE HIM A BATH AND GOT HIM DOLLED UP FOR OUR BIG DATE, EVEN COLONGE.  HE LOOKED SO CUTE.  WE DIDN'T TALK ABOUT ANYTHING THAT WOULD CHANGE THE WORLD,  ONLY STUFF THAT A THREE YEAR OLD CARES ABOUT.  POWER RANGERS AND SPONGEBOB.  WE WENT TO A MOVIE, HAPPY FEET.

WE GOT IN THE CAR TO GO GET SOMETHING TO EAT.  SURPISINGLY HE SUGGESTED MCDONALDS.  IT WAS HIS DAY SO I TRIED TO ACT EXCITED ABOUT THE GOLDEN ARCHES.  BY THE TIME WE GOT OUT OF THE PARKING LOT HE WAS ASLEEP.  WE WENT HOME INSTEAD.
LATER THAT NIGHT HE CRAWLED INTO MY LAP AND WHISPERED INTO MY EAR, "MOMMY, I WUV YOU SOO MUCH".  MY EYES TEARED UP AND I ANSWERED, "I WILL LOVE YOU FOREVER".  HE LOOKED UP AT ME SMILED AND JUMPED DOWN OFF MY LAP.  MY HEART MELTED.   

I BONDED WITH MY LITTLE GUY.  IT WAS A LONG TIME COMING BUT WORTH THE WAIT.  I AM JUST GLAD HE WAS WILLING TO WAIT FOR ME TO SLOW DOWN AND TO  LOOK INTO HIS EYES AND FALL IN LOVE WITH HIM AGAIN LIKE I DID WHEN HE WAS BORN.

I HAVE TO SAY IT WAS THE BEST DATE I HAVE EVER BEEN ON AND THE BEST I WILL EVER GO ON.  THANK YOU BRIZZLE. 

8:50 PM - 10 Comments - 10 Kudos - Add Comment

LIFE

YOU KNOW LIFE SUCKS SOMETIMES- I HAVE TRYED TO QUIT SMOKING ONCE AGAIN!  MY POOR KIDS KNOW TO DO AS I ASK BECAUSE, AS MY DAUGHTER SAYS, "YOU WILL GET FUSTATED".  EVEN WITH CUTE SAYINGS LIKE THAT I TEND TO GET PISSED OFF. 

WHY IS IT KIDS LOVE TO PUSH ON THE SEAT IN FRONT OF THEM IN THE CAR, AND NOT LIGHTLY, AND NOT CONSISTENT PRESSURE.  THEY MAKE YOU BOUNCE.  IF YOU CAN'T TELL, THIS HAPPENED TO ME IN THE CAR COMING HOME FROM DAYCARE.  ALMOST THE WHOLE WAY HOME I FELT LIKE I WAS ON A RIDE IN AN AMUSEMENT PARK.  I DIDN'T DARE STOP TO TAKE CARE OF THE SITUATION WITH MY YOUNGEST BECAUSE ALL OF YOUR RATIONAL THINKING FLYS OUT THE WINDOW WHEN YOUR BODY IS GOING THOUGH WITHDRAWALS OF NICOTINE.

SO I JUST NEEDED TO GET THAT OFF MY CHEST BEFORE I GO LIGHT UP A CIG.  THANK YOU FOR LISTENING(OR READING).  I WILL TRY TO BE A LITTLE MORE ENTERTAINING FOR FUTURE BLOGS.

5:07 PM - 4 Comments - 8 Kudos - Add Comment

HELP

OKAY I SPEND MY DAY WITH FOLKS LIKE REBA AND WILSON (REFER TO B- BRIZZLES WORK AT FLY CROOKED .COM)  WHO COULD DRIVE YOU TOTALLY MAD WITH ONE SENTENCE (IF YOU CAN DECIFER IT).  I CONGRATULATE MYSELF THE WHOLE WAY HOME BECAUSE I DID NOT GIVE INTO THE NEED FOR A CIGARETTE , AND I STICK TO MY DIET , AND DIDNT SPEND ANY OF MY MONEY I BUMMED SOME FROM SOME CO-WORKERS TO BUY MY OTHER ADDICTION....... DIET COKE.
AS SOON AS I WALK IN THE DOOR OF MY HOME YOU COULD COT THE TENSION WITH A KNIFE.  MY HUSBAND IS JOINING ME IN MY QUEST TO BE SMOKE FREE.  THE KIDS ARE RUNNING AROUND LIKE A COUPLE OF BANCHES AND IT LOOKS LIKE MY HUSBAND HAS BEEN SITTING AT THE KITCHEN TABLE ALL DAY WITH THE PLAYSTATION PORTABLE HE GOT FOR CHRISTMAS GLUED TO HIS HANDS. IT IS A SAD SIGHT TO SEE A REASONABLE MAN BE BROUGHT TO THIS. I HAVE TO SAY HE DID COOK DINNER,  ALL ON THE DIET WE ARE TRYING TO ABIDE BY.  OFCOURSE I AM APPRECIATIVE AND MUMBLE MY THANKS AFTER DINNER THE WHOLE FAMILY GO INTO DIFFERENT ROOMS, SO AS NOT TO KILL EACH OTHER.  MY HUSBAND BRINGS UP THE CLOTHES FROM THE LAUNDRY TO BE PUT AWAY.  HE IS PRACTICALLY GROWLING.  HE ASKS WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME WITH A BIT OF ATTITUDE IN HIS VOICE.  I SAY BACK WITH A BIT OF ATTITUDE IN MY VOICE, " WHAT DO YOU THINK? I WANT A CIGERETTE!"

HE LOOKS AT ME WITH A GLEEM IN HIS EYE. "I HAVE A LIGHTER".  MY SPIRITS START TO RISE.  I REPLY "I HAVE THE SMOKES".  WE PRACTICALLY KNOCK EACH OHTER DOWN ON THE WAY OUT THE DOOR.

SO I WOULD LIKE TO KNOW WHY IS IT I CAN DAEL WITH 64 CRAZY OLD PEOPLE AND NOT GIVE INTO MY CRAVING,  BUT ARRIVE HOME AND NEED A CIG AS SOON AS MY FOOT HITS THE CARPET TO MY HOME.

BUT THE DIET IS GOING REALLY WELL.

4:35 AM - 5 Comments - 6 Kudos - Add Comment

THOSE DAMN RESOLUTIONS
Current mood: hopeful

OKAY HERE WE GO ON IN TO A NEW YEAR.  I CAN'T BELEIVE IT TIME REALLY DOES GO FASTER AS YOU GET OLDER WHAT THE HELL IS WITH THAT?  I REMEMBER IT TAKING FOREVER FOR MY BIRTHDAY TO COME AROUND EACH YEAR.  ANYWAY,  I AM GOING TO TRY THR WHOLE RESOLUTION THING AGAIN THIS YEAR, HOPEFULLY WITH A LITTLE MORE SUCCESS.

NOT ONLY AM I DOING ONE , WHICH IS HARD ENOUGH, BUT I HAVE QUITE A FEW( I MAY NEED SOME PROFESSIONAL HELP WITH ALL OF MY CURRENT PROBLEMS...... SHIT).

I BELIEVE THE FIRST ORDER OF BUSINESS SHOULD BE MY HEALTH, SO I WILL BE NOT BE SMOKING ANY LONGER( I HEAR THE SNIKERING NOW STOP THAT AND READ ON).  I QUIT FOR A WHOLE 2 YEARS AND STARTED AGAIN(I KNOW ...I KNOW BUT I  NEVER SAID I WAS A ROCKET SCIENTIST).  IT WAS HARD THE FIRST TIME AND I AM SURE IT WILL BE HARD THIS TIME AS WELL.
THE SHOPOHOLIC IN ME IS WEEPING AND MY HANDS ARE SHAKING AS I AM ABOUT TO COMMIT A SERIOUS CRIME,  I AM GOING TO TRY TO SAVE MONEY (GEEZ THAT WAS HARDER THEN I THOUGHT IT WOULD BE)I AM SO SORRY TO ALL MY SHOPOHOLIC BROTHERS AND SISTERS, PLEASE DO NOT THINK BADLY OF ME AND PLEASE DONT TURN YOUR BACK ON ME.

THE NEXT IS TO LOSE WEIGHT BUT EVERYBODY DOES THAT SO THAT IS PRETTY MUCH A GIMME.

AND LAST BUT NOT LEAST IS TO FIGURE OUT ALL OF THIS PICTURE GLUE MOVE AND STICK PICS IN DIFFERENT PLACES, WITH THE EASE OF A PROFESSIONAL. ALSO, TO LEARN TO DOWNLOAD MUSIC TO A CD BURNER THING.
SO THERE YOU HAVE IT ALL OF MY NEW YEARS RESOLUTIONS PLEASE PRAY FOR ME AND MY FAMILY THAT I DONT HURT MYSELF OR THEM.
CHECK UP ON ME OFTEN I WILL LET YOU ALL KNOW OF MY SUCCESS(OR FAILURE).

7:39 PM - 4 Comments - 4 Kudos - Add Comment

HERE I COME
Category: Blogging

I JUST WANT TO GIVE MR. B-BRIZZLE A HEADS UP OF HOW MANY  PEOPLE HAVE COME TO SEE MY SPACE......TAKE A DEEP BREATH FOLKS........A STAGGERING 91 HITS!   B-BRIZZLE YOU MAY HAVE A LITTLE COMPETITION ON YOUR HANDS.  NOW I DON'T WANT TO WORRY YOU, BUT HONESTLY HOW COULD YOU NOT LOOK AT THAT BEAUTIFUL WOMAN ON THE SCREEN AND NOT CLICK ON THE PIC.  JUST TO SEE IF MAYBE SHE PUT HER ORTHODONTISTS NUMBER ON HER SPACE AND GIVE HIM A CALL TO HAVE A WONDERFUL GRILL LIKE THAT.  I CAN TELL I DON'T LEAVE MUCH CORN ON THE COB.

6:43 PM - 2 Comments - 2 Kudos - Add Comment

I WAS TAGGED

I HAVE BEEN TAGGED.... THE RULES ARE AS FOLLOWS YOU HAVE TO WRITE 6 WIERD THINGS ABOUT YOU THEN PICK 6 PEOPLE TO DO THE SAME THING, YOU HAVE TO WRITE THESE RULES ALSO

HERE WE GO.......
I LOVE NEIL DIAMOND(FOREVER IN BLUE JEANS BABE)

I CAN TURN MY FEET AROUND BACKWARDS(PICTURE TO FOLLOW)

I HAVE SEEN A UFO( I SWEAR IT WAS A UFO)

I DON'T LIKE MY FOOD TO TOUCH(SO MUCH I WILL NOT EAT THE SPOT OF FOOD THAT TOUCH EACH OTHER)

THAT B-BRIZZLE HAD TO REMIND ME THAT THE FOOD THING IS A WEIRD THING.

I HAVE A CONTROL ISSUE WHILE IN THE CAR (I HAVE TO DRIVE, I CANNOT HANDLE BEING A PASSENGER USUALLY THE DRIVER CAN'T HANDLE ME BEING A PASSENGER EITHER)

HERE IS A BONUS WIERD THING I ONLY HAVE 3 PEOPLE I CAN TAG.  SINCE I DON'T KNOW WHO THE HELL TOM IS I DOUBT THAT HE WILL DO THE WHOLE TAG THING.  THE LUCKY PEOPLE TO BE TAGGED WILL BE STACEY AND RON.

MAKE SURE TO LET THE PEOPLE YOU TAG KNOW AND INVITE THEM TO READ YOURS.

4:08 PM - 4 Comments - 4 Kudos - Add Comment