I would like to take this opportunity to thank the "Rumblers" NYC chapter for the fantastic hot rod show and hospitality this past weekend. I had a real blast there and, ran into some great friends I had not seen in a while. The party has gotten so big so fast, just like the motors you boys roll with!!! I also want to thank the local chapter for bringing the other hot rod hooligans from New Mexico, Florida, Cali, and friends from all over, to Doc Holliday's Sunday night to party with Meridith and I. We had a great time with you girls and boys there too!!! You are all welcome to come visit us anytime and the door is always open. After getting some bad news Thursday night I needed some cheering up and, I got to party at your place all afternoon on Saturday and got to see a mosh pit at 3:45 AM in a country bar on Sunday. The weekend was priceless and, exactly what the doctor ordered. So, thanks again and I will be posting photos from the party on here, today or tomorrow, if anyone wants to see some hot rods from the show. Later, Johnny
Favorite quotes, one liners, and things overheard...
Current mood: amused
Category: Life
Hello once again my dear friends. Here is the latest of blog life. I was just sitting around thinking of what new subject to write about on here and I decided with all the times I have walked up on conversations in bars, while working or drinking, and heard some of the funniest parts of conversations that were only meant for the person they were talking to, I would try to string those together in here with some of my favorite poetry quotes, movie quotes, tv... etc. Some are wonderously funny and some are plain crude but most of them will get some kind of reaction in each and every one of you that read it and that has been the sole purpose of my writting from day one. I will gradually add more to this as I think of more, get new stories, or read new ones I like. I hope you enjoy. Oh, and if you know me, try and figure out which ones are mine and which ones are from where. Johnny
8/8/08
This was an exchange between myself and a woman coming into my bar...
1. "Hi, Can I see your I.D. please?" woman's reply- "Im 43. Im old enough to be your mother!" In which I replied- "If you were 8... AND A WHORE!!!"
This one was purely accidental by me but hysterical just the same. I was at my friends wedding reception and the groom's mother was giving a speech. The first thing she said was how nervous she was about public speaking. To this my reply was...
2. "Just picture all of us in YOUR underwear."
3. If my floor was my glass, I would finally be getting the ice in my drink.
4. Sex turns straight people gay and gays into Mexicans.
5. Gimme a vial of sperm and an applicator that looks like Jodi Foster's knuckles... said the lesbian at the sperm bank.
6. Slutty is the new black.
7. I am a man armed with a fork in a land of soup.
8. I was going to buy KY Jelly at the store earlier but, they were all out. I got Smuckers instead.
9. Hey, I just made this peanut butter and jelly sandwich and it tastes weird!
10. My penis tastes so good, if I put it on top of your head, your tongue would beat you to death trying to get to it.
11. I live in a world of pancakes and urine.
12. "The truth must dazzle gradually, or every man be blind."
13. The last time I got a piece of ass is when my finger broke through the toilet paper.
14. "Be yourself, everyone else is already taken."
15. Its only binge drinking if you stop!!!
8/26/08
16. If god didnt want us to eat animals, he would not have made them out of MEAT!!!
17. Not everyone is lucky enough to be raised in a white trash trailer park, by a bow legged female whose sole qualifications for motherhood are a womb and, the ability to catch sperm from a passing truck driver.
18. At least my momma took me to NASCAR.
19. I didnt drink for 10 years. What happened that you started drinking? I turned 11.
The "art" of tipping. Here’s a few tips...
Current mood: blah
Category: Food and Restaurants
Here are a few "tips" for you to take with you every time you leave the house to go out and play at a bar, eatery, club, etc... I wrote some of this, added to a pre-existing bulletin from Father Vincent, and had Frank Wood's views and comments on here as well. If you are in the business as well, and have something to add, drop a comment on here or send it to me in an e-mail and I will add to this as well. You too may also copy and re-post this but give credit where it is due, just like tipping. Thanks for reading, Johnny Psu
Hey guys,
There are many good points made here and since I am in the business, as are many of my friends on here, I decided this was a good forum to spread the word.
Feel free to copy and re-post this for the small percentage of free-loading "friends" you may have lol I will add some comments on here to go along with the dollar a drink tip rule and such...
A bartender always appreciates this rule.
Along with that, we always remember the good tippers, they get a couple more "buy backs" from us than others do, we tell each other who you are so we all give you better service, and first service over others when busy.Guess what though, we remember the "NON-TIPPING DOUCHE-BAG" over all others. We tell each other who you are too, you get less than quality service, poor attitude, and if you do it enough to me... oops, did I spill that round of drinks over after you paid for them??? Im sorry but, you've been screwing me all night, I figured I would return the favor. Now get out of my bar!!! (*yes I have done this) So, spread the word and enjoy yourselves.
Johnny Psu
This is a repost from FATHER VINCENT.
THANK YOU PADRE.
*Frank Wood and Johnny Psu changed a few things, and added some comments others made, to make it appropriate for all different groups of party goers.
READ IT !
COMPREHEND IT !
DO IT !
Take care,
WOOD
To all you Party goers, Bar flies and part time Alcoholics...
I have heard from one too many bartenders, complaining about people not "TIPPING"... and rightfully so!
With the shortage of spaces for parties to happen, the last thing we need is an unhappy Bartender talking ill about us. It is high time we change the stigma of being "those Cheap Kids" or "all they drink is water".
Now I know this doesn't apply to everyone but, everyone out there needs to make an effort.
If you see someone not Tipping.... Say something to them.
Don't turn a blind eye!
If you don't have enough money to leave a tip... don't even buy a drink...better yet, don't even come out... stay home. Save some money and come back next time.
It is good rule of thumb to tip at least ONE dollar per drink... If you are about to order a drink that is, lets say $7, and thats all you have.. why not get a $6 drink so you can leave that $1 tip?.?.
There are many Benefits to leaving that tip.
You might not realize this but, the Bartender will notice and maybe the next drink you order will be stronger, The bartender will respond to you quicker.. they will be friendlier... they might even buy you a drink back.
Like I said, many of you know this, but to those who don't, please learn.
If you didn't know, Bartenders don't get a hourly wage. Most get a minimal shift pay of $30, or less, and some, not even that.
*You must also remember, not every shift they work is busy and sometimes walk with barely more than that shift pay so, the 1 or 2 busy nights a week they may have is what they have to live on.
So they rely on Tips!
The goodwill alone is worth it.
Too many bar patrons out there have "fishhooks in their pockets" when it comes to tipping.
And don't get me started on tipping the band.
Most venues around the NYC dont pay bands and if they do, its rarely enough to make enough for each member to buy a slice of pizza and a beer.
How people can sit there and be entertained and walk right by the tip bucket for the band on their way out floors me.
If there is no cover, the band gets paid by the bucket.
Isn't each band member worth at least $1.00? C'mon! You'd have to pay more if there was a door charge.
Rule of thumb.. if you see a band's tip bucket, drop something in and let them know they were appreciated and entertained you.
It is only fair that these good men and women, that provide us with the means to have a good time and help you forget about your own problems for a while, should be given their well earned appreciation..
I will not stop reminding you people about this at any event I am attending, working, or hosting.
I WILL BE WATCHING YOU.
So don't be surprised, if you find me standing next to you, reminding you to leave a tip.
Whenever I have a Mic in my hand, again reminding you all to tip... I will not stop until I hear the bartenders telling me otherwise!
Steal this blog... *thanks Brock
Current mood: rebellious
Category: Music
This is something one of my "friends" , Brock, wrote and I totally agree with. Not to mention, I have repeated and talked about this subject with many friends over the past several years since the ever increasing popularity of music downloads. Record companies vowed to make cds less expensive to buy than its vinyl counterpart within a short time after the transitional phase. Their prices never went down and, in most cases, went way up. So in my mind, stealing or sharing music files is totally fine by me when the music companies have been screwing us, the consumer, for so long. Not to mention how many artists over the years died penniless and broke due to being screwed by the labels as well. Pay-back is a bitch Mr. record label and you asked for it in an amount you could never imagine!!!
Hope you enjoy and spread the word.
Thanks, Johnny
By the way guys, Brock has amazingly funny blogs you should check out and subscribe to. You are sure to get a good laugh or have some kind of wonderful blog like this pass across your screen.
Hey there guys,
Brock here (for a lush, yet fleeting
moment) with a neat little video clip that pretty much
sums up the record industry and their artists'
relationship's.
This clip was recorded on an Iphone at a live Nine
Inch Nails show. Trent Reznor is basically speaking
out on behalf of millions (if not billions) of people
who feel like paying 19.99+ for a compact disc is
fucking ridiculous.
The clip was filmed in Australia very recently where
the price of American made CD's by major labels
can easily shoot upwards to 39.99 U.S. dollars (and
that's on sale...). I've posted the audio in text in
case you can't understand over the crowd, but you
should easily be able to. Stick around for the song if
A serious blog for the ladies safety
Current mood: frustrated
Category: Life
OK, this one is all about me just having enough, and seeing enough shit, that I dont want to see it any more.
Tonight I had a foursome of guys towards the end of the night. They were assholes from the get go but they were the same assholes as any other ones that frequent any bar I worked in for the last couple years.
They were playing pool and annoying but, they were spending money, tipping decent, and buying drinks for the regulars I knew.
After about an hour and a half, I noticed a friend of mine, who happens to be a cute girl, go from buzzed to falling down, in about 5 minutes.
At this point I noticed one guy trying to hook up with her at the bar...
I told him she was a friend, and drunk, and he proceeded to try and buy more drinks for her and others to make me drop the subject... didnt happen.
Next, when I didnt give in, he walked back to the pool table, and his friend then did the same routine. Still to no avail.
Then I had a third... At this point I was way too aware of what was going on so, he gave up without really trying.
The fourth guy then started a fight with me to try and distract me while his friends tried to take her out of the bar.
This is what can happen if some girl isnt paying attention to what someones motives are, thinks its ok to mooch free drinks off guys all night, and if there isnt someone working where you are at, that gives a shit, you are getting gang raped by a bunch of nasty, fucked up assholes.
So, let this be a warning...
Dont tell your friends to leave if you want to get fucked up for free at the hands of strangers.
Dont think that everyone that's buying you drinks is just being nice.
And pray to god, someone actually cares enough, and is paying enough attention to you, to notice when someone is trying to pull this shit on you.
Needless to say, people went home in a whole lot worse condition than what they showed up like.
I hope this made some of you open your eyes to what lengths some dicks will go to just to get a piece of your ass. Is getting drunk on someone elses dollar really worth the final result?
Glad if I helped any of you and try to remember this EVERY TIME you go out!
Breed Specific Laws and the IGNORANT that support them...
Current mood: determined
Category: Pets and Animals
There are a few ignorant people out there trying to pass Breed Specific Laws. These are laws that will make it possible for the government to come to your house and snatch away your dog, then KILL IT!!! Depending on if it falls into what THEY deem a VIOLENT or VISCOUS BREED. It doesn't matter whether or not the dog has attacked anyone EVER. This so called law, is blind to the charecter of the dog in question, it is based solely on BREED. Now, thats like saying... These types of PEOPLE commit the most crimes, lets round up ALL those types of people and KILL THEM. That way there will be no more crimes commited by anyone of that race. HELLO, THAT IS GENOCIDE!!! Here is a few facts about Harley and dogs like him. The PitBull is NOT a specific breed of dog, but rather a term used to describe SEVERAL breeds of dogs with similar physical characteristics. The American Pit Bull Terrier, Staffordshire Bull Terrier and the American Staffordshire Terrier (THAT'S MY BOY) commonly fall under the category of "Pit Bull." There are several other breeds that can fall under the rubric of "pit bull," including: the Argentine Dogo, the English Bull Terrier, the American Bulldog, Perro de Presa Canario and the Boxer...
Where will they stop???
There are also politicians working on passing this same law towards ALL breeds of dogs that THEY may decide are dangerous. Such breeds include loyal and brave dogs such as German Shepards and Doberman Pincers. Dogs that law enforcement and other government agencies have been using for oursafety and thenationssecurity. It's not the dog that may have the problem . In my opinion, its often the training that goes into the raising of these animals as well as how the owner treats them. It's the same as raising a child, if you are a crappy parent, you will be bringing a child up to be a crappy person as well, with no values.
******************************************************************************************************* VISIT THIS SITE TO LEARN MORE INTERESTING FACTS & COMMON MYTHS ABOUT PIT BULLS*** HTTP://WWW.BADRAP.ORG/RESCUE/MYTHS.CFM ******************************************************************************************************* *******************************************************************************************************
Here is some more info and a blog from Harley's Profile Page
HELP STOP BSL IN NY...AND ALL OVER THE USA!
Below is the contact info for NY's District Office and Legislative Office. We need to display a powerful and effective message as a united state of America! Even if you do NOT live in NY you can take part as an American. BSL will effect dog lovers all over the country eventually. Send council member Peter F. Vallone Jr. an email or send one every day! Make a call or fax whatever it takes! We need to reach out to NY State and show them that we will NEVER accept BSL!
Just a few reminders: 1) SEND FACT BASED LETTERS OR EMAILS ON WHY BSL IS A BAD IDEA..
2) OUR GOAL IS TO EDUCATE THE UNEDUCATED.
3) YOU CAN ALSO MAKE YOUR RESPECTFUL COMPLAINTS BY PHONE OR FAX..
4) OUR GOAL IS TO OPEN THEIR EYES WITHOUT USING ANGER..& HATE
5) EVEN INCLUDE PICTURES OF YOUR FAMILY'S PIT BULL TO SHOW THE SOFTER SIDE OF OUR LOVABLE FRIENDS!
6) LET THEM KNOW THAT WE WON'T LET OUR DOGS AND OUR FAMILIES BE VICTIMS OF BSL!
**PLEASE DON'T FORGET THAT YOU CATCH MORE BEES WITH HONEY..SO DON'T LET YOUR RAGE OVER THIS EXTREMELY UPSETTING MATTER GET THE BEST OF YOU**
**ALSO, DON'T FORGET TO ALWAYS PROVIDE FACTS AND STATISTICS TO BACK UP YOUR STATEMENTS**
**WE CAN WIN THIS IF WE REALLY WANT TO!!**
AS OF DEC. 26, 2006 QUEENS COUNCIL MEMBER PETER VALLONE JR. CALLED FOR A CITYWIDE BAN ON PIT BULLS.
IF WE DO NOT SPEAK UP OUR FAMILIES WILL BE TORN APART BY B.S.L. IN NYC!!!
CONTACT MR. VALLONE AND TELL HIM YOU DO NOT SUPPORT B.S.L!!
District Office Address: 22-45 31st Street., Astoria Astoria, New York 11105 District Office Phone No.: (718) 274-4500 District Office Fax No.: (718) 726-0357 ------------------------------------------------------- Legislative Office Address: 250 Broadway, 17th Floor NY, NY 10007 Legislative Office Phone No.: (212) 788-6963 Legislative Office Fax No.: (212) 788-8957 ------------------------------------------------------- Email: vallonejr@council.nyc.ny.us ________________________________________________________
It's official, he's going for the Presidency in 2008. All other issues aside, dog owners concerned about breed specific legislation should NOT support Giuliani . He believes Pit Bulls should be exterminated. He tried to pass a law in NY imposing very strict regulations against Pit Bulls. He has made no secret of the fact that he despises Pit Bulls. He wanted to ELIMINATE HEARINGS on dangerous dogs and let cities DESTROY pets without such a hearing.
Any politician that advocates ELIMINATING due process HEARINGS for any reason is NO politician that should be President of the United States. Hearings for people accused of committing crimes are a Constitutional Right (and most dangerous dog citations fall under the criminal code against the owner). Rudy Giuliani wants to bypass the United States Constitution and deprive people of their Constitutional Rights.
STOP BSL IN THE USA..
SIGN THIS PETITION BEFORE IT'S TOO LATE!!
THIS PETION IS NOT ONLY FOR N.Y. BUT THE ENTIRE US.
I had such a great day until...
Current mood: crazy
Category: Life
*** Note: I wrote this on 8/5/06
I woke up early and was happy to know my bike was in the shop, being fixed. Then, I sat down on my deck and played guitar for a little bit. This was nice because it was the first time I had in months and the weather was beautiful. Then I showered and went to work a half hour earlier than usual.
Here's where the total destruction of a nice day began...
I was checking my emails right before I got on the bus and when I sat down on the bus I realized I lost my stylus. *that gay little pencil thingy for your PDA type phones. I was already a few stops away and didnt have more money on my metro card to get back on the next bus so... ditched the stylus. Next came the train station. Here it gets really shitty. I sit down next to these really cute girls who are dressed really nice and look about 20 or so. Well, you can never imagine how wrong I was!!! I sat there 20 minutes waiting for my train, which was also DELAYED, listening to this girl babble to her friend, THE ENTIRE TIME, about a boy she met that basically told her every line in the book to ensure him getting in her pants, and she was cooing over all of it and it was soo annoying. I just kept looking at her, and her cuteness was fading soo fast. Turns out they were 17 and just finished high school. I could tell you the entire history of this one girl and never even spoke to her. I dont even think she took a breath the whole time she spoke.
Here's where the train ride from hell takes place...
I finally get on the train, and run in the opposite direction of the 2 annoying girls, I find an entire empty row of seats in an almost full car and think "WOW, this must be my lucky day for seating..."
Well, I soon find out why there are empty seats when I hear 30 guys that just got out of high school, yelling, cursing and screaming, giving high-fives to one another, passing booze filled pepsi bottles and starbucks cups to each other. All in all, a great time to up and move. BUT... there arent any seats in other cars unless I want to sandwiched between 2 jerks reading with their bare, stinky feet out on the seat across from them. Mind you, its only 7 PM and I HATE FEET!!!
I get off the train finally and there is a couple fighting all the way through penn station. She was hot as hell and he was a total hip-hop fashion victim. They screamed all the way out to the street before she finally bashed him over the head with a beach chair. THAT WAS AWESOME!!!
But then...
I will add to this later, I got a lot of stuff to do.
Ode to Mother nature...
Current mood: tired
Category: Life
Ode to mother nature, or god, or satan, or whom ever may be responsible for the local weather lately.
I love the way there has been a "chance of rain" every day and we get torrential down pours of fist sized rain that pummel the crap out of man, and beast, alike for 12 hours straight. Then HOT, STICKY, HUMID AIR, in between traffic crippling storms.
I dont remember the last time, ever in my life, heat and rain knocked out power and the subway trains for nearly a week. (* I wrote this before the blackout was over, there was no power in a few neighborhoods for about 9 days.)
Good going!!!
I also love when its nice and cool at night, or so we think. Then you walk half of a block and... are drenched from the humidity.
On the days it hasnt rained, and those are few and far between lately, it has been well over 100 degrees. Thats f*ckin awesome!!! Especially when you go into the subway and its 30 degrees hotter in there.
Oh, and dont forget the big thanks for making me play hop-scotch between the puddles on my deck just to smoke a cigarette.
My Daily Grind... By Johnny Drunkerton
Current mood: drunk
Category: Life
7/18/06
OK, since soo many people ask me why I dont hang out any more or where I am most of the time, I decided to write a blog explaining what I go through every day, or almost every day. I am now only working 5 days a week but that just started a few days ago and in a few more days I am going to be working on my days off doing sound for TV on WWE so...
Here goes a day in the life of Johnny Drunkerton...
About 5:30-6:00pm (* 3-4 days a week) Wake up groggy and either do the fireman right outta bed into my clothes or jump right into the shower and then go.
Then... Grab the bus or walk to the railroad. Get to Penn Station and bob and weave through the sea of stupidity called rush hour. I get out of the railroad, dodge a few idiots on my dash to the stairway up to Penn, all along noticing who the best looking chicks are on my way... lol I make it up to 7th ave and then, once again, bob and weave through thousands of retards making their way across 7th ave. , against traffic without looking, and onto 32nd St. into Penn St.
Here is where it always gets interesting...
If its raining... I have thousands of idiots that dont realize they have pointy, sharp, metal extensions above their heads, and at MY eye level. These are also the same jackasses that take up the entire sidewalk, forcing me and countless others, to jump into the street to avoid loosing an eye or permanent facial scarring.
Now I hurdle the 4 homeles guys laying on the sidewalk shaking cups of change, spaced at an even 40 yards apart. These guys are great. They lay in the nooks and crannies of the store fronts and are FACE DOWN!!! Thats right. These mother f*ckin bastids are soo good at pan-handling they lay face down and get cash from suckers. Then there's the woman that gives you the "sad face", with a side of "please help us" while begging for herself and her child. Dont get me wrong, I'm not heartless scum but, I know a shitbag with a gimmick when I see one. She is soo polite until you dont give her anything, or money, and pass her. Then she curses you out, right in front of her kid, or whom ever he belongs to. I pass her then there is the corner...
With a musical ensemble from South America playing "earthy" music with flutes and coconuts and vines and shit. *Always a small crowd here...but good tunes.
That wouldn't be so bad but, there's a food vendor for hot pretzels, a vendor for honey roasted peanuts and cashews, <*this is one of the yummyEST street vendor smells known to man... never mind NYC. There is also a book vendor, a movie vendor, and a guy that sells misc. crap. So, as you might have guessed, this causes quite the obstruction between myself and the path of least resistance to the subway. * Oh, And did I mention, the entrance to the subway is also the entrance to the Manhattan Mall in Herald Square? Yup. Tourist shopping center of NYC. So... in the one Ave. I walk, from the railroad to the subway, its quite trying on your nerves.
Now on to the subway entrance...OK... Now I'm on the stairs.
There are a bunch of people walking up as I go down. Do they take one side of the stairway??? NO!!! They come up in a line from one side of the stairs to the other, not paying attention to whom may be coming down at them. Nor do they have the manners or common sense to move to one side. Just barrel upward, blindly, and bash into whatever gets in their way. Now, if you read my previous blog entries, you know this is not my only dilema on my decent into the hell 3 stories below Manhattan Mall. This is where people decide to stop and talk to a friend, or talk on the phone, or look for money, or a metrocard... Yes, I hate these people.
The reason... If I go straight from one train to the other, I usually either just make it, or just miss it. *Doors closing in my face, miss it! These are the assholes that make me miss it.
Now. If I miss the train... I have to stand on the platform for 5-10 minutes... SWEATING MY ASS OFF!!! Because, its 120 degrees down there with no breeze, ventilation, or anything resembling life support.
If I make the train right away.... YAY!!!
Its usually nice and cool, with a couple seats available. But, once in a while...Once in a really long while... I get a car with no air conditioning!!!This is bad. This is REALLY BAD!!!
The reason this is soo bad is because, the newer subway cars wont let you go from one car to the next. So, after standing on the hellatious platform of death sweating your ass off, you get into a car thinking you are saved from the heat and stench from hell but...you get a car with hot stagnant air, then you add the disgusting odor of sweat, breath, and body odor, mixed with NYC subway, and you just wanna die!
Now I sit for all of 5 or 10 minutes, depending on whether or not the train gets delayed on its way downtown. I get off the nice cool train, (*hopefully) then make my way up 2 flights of stairs to the street. I then walk to my bar, whichever one I'm working at, and start my night off there.
The bar stuff comes later. Then my way home. Yup, I think this shit is soo important I am going "play by play" on your asses from start to finish BITCHES!!!
Dont worry, I will edit and add to this. This is gonna be quite the laugh factory. Im a fag.
WOW, that was so bad I wanna punch myself in the balls.
amused
blah
rebellious
frustrated
determined
crazy
tired
drunk