Bellingham Situation Room: June Edition
Current mood: pensive

"Dean took out other pictures. I realized these were all the snapshots which our children would look at someday with wonder, thinking their parents had lived smooth, well-ordered, estabilished-within-the-photo lives and got up in the morning to walk proudly on the sidewalks of life, never dreaming the raggedy madness and riot of our actual lives, our actual night, the hell of it, the senseless nightmare road. All of it inside endless and beginningless emptiness. Pitiful forms of ignorance."

-Jack Kerouac

When I was back down in Kenmore earlier this month while going through my drawer in search of left-behinds to bring up with me to Bellingham, I stumbled across some old photos of me and Natsumi that I had forgotten to throw away. It's funny how a photo typically only portrays the picture perfect side of things. The smiles in those photos could not communicate to you the time and money invested into a short term relationship with no payoff. The photographs of me and Tomoe in Japan could not illustrate to you the Goodbye aspect of life, not knowing when you would see this person again other than the good faith knowledge that you would do everything you could with the time you had to make a trip across the world to reunite at some point, hopefully soon, and that you are incomplete without this person. Yes, there are somethings a photo can't tell you. That's why I'm glad that I've been blessed with novelist caliber writing skills to accompany my boyish good looks. I can convey the good times photogenically, and communicate the things that happen after the lense cap is snapped on in writing. Because if it's in writing... it's official.

So you know how some people look like their name? Like, "Oh you're name is Andrew? You definately look like an Andrew." I've always wondered why that is, but I've come to accept it. Now I can look at somebody and determine their personality in the same aspect. I saw this guy walking past my store, middle aged, poofy hair, wearing a sport coat blazer over bluejeans. I thought to myself, "Yes, this guy is definately an asshole." A few minutes later he walks by my store again holding an 18 pack of beer in one hand and 3 wine bottles under his other arm. Yup. Asshole. Had to stock up on the old wifebeating fuel. Later that evening a woman entered my store. I could tell by her face that she was trouble. She was sporting an ugly mug. Turns out I was right. She's typically a Walmart shopper. She didn't like my price of $32.99 for a universal battery charger. She said, "Did you know they have this exact same one at Walmart for $19.99?" I replied, "I wouldn't know. I refuse to shop there." She says, "Why do you refuse to shop there?" "For my own personal reasons" I said. "Which are?" she asked. "My own personal reasons. If I wanted to go into it I would have shared it with you the first time you asked wouldn't I?" She said, "Well I thought you should know this exact charger is cheaper at walmart." In which I said, "This exact charger? This one here that says Radioshack on the charger itself? Hm. Interesting." Walmart: Violating labor laws and human rights across the globe to make thrifty shoppers feel classier and smarter than they are. It's amazing how companies can profit by giving retards an ego boost.

Exciting thing to report: The full 2 seasons of Prince Valiant is on DVD. If you've never seen it and are interested you should watch it with me. If you've never seen it and don't care, you don't deserve to watch it.

I went to this bar called Boundary Bay last week in which a band was playing called Acorn Project. And yes, they are very decent. It's the best local show I've ever been to in any localized type of show. In general, I isolate myself from the local scene. Why? Many bands suck. This band really had it together. They play in perfect harmony with each other 100% of the time. I was very impressed. The show was in the outdoor area down the patio steps outside the bar. You had to go upstairs into the bar for the good drinks though. They brew their own beer there. I went with the Highlander Beer. It kicked my ass.So I buzzed my head again. I actually have started to enjoy having a little bit of hair, but bartenders here have no imagination. Probably due to the number of college kids running around with fake ID's. I've been questioned on my ID a few times, once threatened to be confiscated due to the fact that in my ID I have no hair vs the inch and a half that I grew. Sure I could always get a new ID, but I'm not fond of the new enhanced drivers licenses that are being distributed. I want to delay that for as long as possible due to the RFID tracking chips inside the license, which is one of the most insecure things possible. It is easier for someone to copy my drivers license information, or all of my debit card information via the paypass RFID than it is to listen to someone's phone coversation by hacking their bluetooth. The only thing easier than stealing someone's info imbedded into an RFID chip is logging on to an unsecured wifi network. The last thing I need is another homing beacon shoved up my ass.

At the very end of May last month (after I put up the first situation room installment) I was lucky enough to attend a Rush concert at the GM Stadium. Do you know what's better than attending a Rush concert? Attending a Rush concert in Row 9. That's where I was. I had an upfront and intimate view of Neil Peart's drumming. The experience was absolutely surreal. I had always kind of liked Rush, but had a hard time getting used to Geddy's woman voice. But when I started drumming a few years ago, I became a Born Again Rush Fan! And I'm telling you, getting to sit close enough to witness Neil Peart's pattern, time, and signature changes was off the wall. And for the record, I won the air drum championship. I think I got everybody in my row going on it as it was contagious once I started.

For those of you who don't know yet, which is most of you, I am working on a short standup comedy routine. In the next few months or so I'm going to book a short standup at the improv club here in town. It's kind of cool, where an amateur gets up on stage and delivers a quick standup comedy sketch, and then the club's improv team reinacts your sketch in a skit type fashion. Wow, skit is a funny word. Like skeet.

I suffered a minor injury the other day, I sprained my toe I think. It's not as purple as it was, but it sure hurts like hell still. I was unpacking my suitcase from the trip back from Kenmore when my new roommate Jeff (who replaced Russian Arthur) appeared through the doorway in my room and asked "Who was the last person to take a shit?" Wondering what kind of question that was, I look up with bewilderment on my face. Apparently the toilet was plugged. My look of bewilderment soon came to a look of surprise and pain to the sound of a thud, which was my computer's portable harddrive in a big metal inclosure box falling out of the suitcase I was holding up and on to my big toe. Like I know who the last person to take a shit was anyway... I was gone for 3 days fucker!

For those of you wondering, it appears that I will not be working the tent sale in Shoreline, so I will only be down once next month. Probably around the 20th. I'll post a bulletin with a definitive date once I know.

For those keeping in touch and sending me a message every once in a while... Thanks. Hey Nick, hurry up and send me a message! I wanna know how you're doing, quit being a mystery to me man! Come on dude, I'm efforting... Boyette and Borba, if you make it up here this next month in July it would be a pleasure to have you here. Any other takers to come up and visit, you're more than welcome to. We'll have some crazy adventures worth mentioning in my July edition of the Bellingham Situation Room.

If you read this whole thing in one sitting, give youself a pat on the back and buy yourself a cookie.

4:56 AM - 1 Comments - 2 Kudos - Add Comment

Letter From Japan: Hysterical Nostalgia
Current mood: nostalgic
Category: Life

Here is an email that was sent to me in August of '05 that I dug up while cleaning out my inbox. Looking back I had to laugh my ass off. The pretext is a cel phone bill in Japan, when me and my friend Charlie rented a phone. There was some confusion of how much the phone costed... I left Japan a week before Charlie did and he got stuck with the bill when he returned the phone... Heh Heh Heh.

--------------------------------------------------------------

you should be sitting down for this....
I almost puked...
now remember there was over 2 hours of phone use when you left...
I wrote it down... there was 2 hours 27 minutes ... I didnt write seconds...

I hope that you remember the cell phone...
just think when you were calling B. Starr... saying "I just drunk sake in the morning..."
well guess what

I spent almost an hour and a half... talking to jennifer...HOLY SHIT
batman...
Well here
So you remember the 315 yen per day... ($3/day access fee)
and you remember the 3.2 yen per minute.. (3 cents/minute rate)
well guess what. Pucker up butter cup... my asshole hurts
its 3.2 yen per SECOND
Thats right bitch per SECOND
that means
2 hours... of about what you talked... and I am guessing roughly...
is 7200 seconds...
at 3.2 per second... and 10 days of use... at 157.5 per day...( I am only
saying 10 give you a break.)
hehehe... yea a break

my ass hurts

well thats a grand total of










24610 yen
or about 246 dollars... yea thats right... did your butt pucker cuz mine did... I
have to pay over 450 dollars... so quit yer bitching and pay up...
the grand total is
150 dollars
50 dollars and
246 dollars

Grand total: 446 dollars... yea... I would take payments... not to be an
asshole or anything.. but the phone is boxed up and put away....

Oh yea... did I tell you that the little dictonary that seth loaned me got
dropped and broken?
yea... 300 dollar dictionary... i have to find one in Akihabara... shit....
Looks like I just spent over 1000 dollars and didn't know it...

I dont even know if my credit card will hold that...
shit.
fuck
damn... I am gonna be broke.


My butt hole is three sizes bigger because of the pucker... yea that boom
you heard yesterday... yeah that was my ass... POP!

I have the reciept... heres the japanese page...
http://www.telecomsquare.co.jp/service/type_oceania.html

and the english
http://www.telecomsquare.co.jp/en/price/index.html

they both say 3.2 yen per second... I am gonna check that sign... tho..
guess we missed the little kanji... I am gonna have to go back and look...
but thats what it says...

fuck...
 
Fuck Japan

you shoulda stayed longer... it would of been interesting.
hehehehe

your partner in a japanese ass ream
charlie

9:11 PM - 0 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

Bellingham Situation Room: Part 1
Current mood: pensive
Category: Life

"I was reading a book called Remembering Babylon, by David Malouf, and his thoughts on the essential quality of 'endurance' made me think of the ponderosa pine seeds that germinate only after a fire, or certain desert plants that germinate only if their husks are worn away by stones in a flash flood, thereby ensuring they will have enough moisture to grow. I also remembered reading about certain fruit seeds which would only germinate if they were excreted by birds or animals. In Darwinian terms, this apparently helped to assure their dispersion, but the metaphor that occured to me concerned the ordeals of new growth - that in order for a little baby seed (or soul) to grow, it would have to pass through fire, flood, or... shit."

-NEP

Oh Lord, Bless this meal I'm about to eat... if it ever gets made. So I'm starting this message to all of you while I'm waiting for my rice to finish cooking. And I'm watching it closely. Usually, I'm not a stickler about cooking rice, it's an easy straight forward process. I just don't trust these cookers. You would think the one thing China would be able to make would be a rice cooker. But then again... I'm not the one who said they aren't a starving country. On this cooker, it has switched from "cooking mode" to "stay warm" mode twice, and I've had to go flip the switch again. In between those 2 reflips, it doesn't look like any progress has been made. Possibly a trip to Denny's and a trip to Fred Meyer to return ANOTHER rice cooker is in hand tonight. I bought a big enough bag of rice to last me 2 months, and the only thing that's stopping me is cooking it. Oh well, looks like a job for a pot and the stove. The problem with the last cooker was that it stopped working altogether during the first cook. Turned off. Would not power on. The problem with this second cooker, is that it seems to think it's done before it actually is done and switches to warm even though there's still water on the rice. Diagnosis: It appears the unit has difficulty calculating heat vs moisture vs amount of rice... or what we scientists like to call a "Fuckup."

There are a lot of challenges one must go through to literally "start over" in a new place. Fire, flood, or... shit is a good starting point to explain the challenges. Firstly, I would like to proudly tell everybody that I will be sleeping on a bed tomorrow evening, and not the floor in a sleeping bag. I was hoping to accomplish this transition a lot sooner, but Sleep Country does not actually stock anything up here. They offered me free delivery to my home, but they don't deliver after 6pm. Picking it up in a truck is going to be the way to do it and bring it home myself. Actually it's not a bed, it's a futon. I'm rationalizing the limited amount of floor space I have. My walls are pretty blank, with the exception of my Johnny Cash photo (signed) hung on the wall, and what appears to be a streak of blood spatter across the ceiling. If you were to walk into my room, you wouldn't think I'm nearly as damn interesting as I do. And with that streak of spatter, you'd probably think I'm way more creepy than I think I am. I've already documented it on the lease as being present before I moved in. I'm not paying for paint!

The other thing about my ceiling is what's above it on the roof. God knows what lives up there, but I hear it scurrying around all night. Probably birds building nests. Maybe it's about time to climb up on the roof and practice my golf swing. By the way, golf is still not a sport. There's also a raccoon that lives in the backyard in a treehouse back there, which apparently has a vendetta against one of my roommates. The story is as follows: "The raccoon was making noise back there, so I threw some rocks against the tree trunk to try and shut him up. He's been stalking me ever since." This story has the plausibility for an amusing ending, regardless of the victor.

Now that I've touched upon the roommate subject, let me introduce you to the first of the three: Pete. Pete works at Wasabi Sushi in downtown Bellingham. In his down time, he smokes pot and gets stalked by raccoons. During his times of "induced enlightenment" he takes notice in how the light pooring up through the spaces between the deck boards from the porchlight underneath is "trippy." Yes, light appearing through open spaces is miraculous, or just in simple terms, one of light's scientific properties. But I have interacted very little with Pete. Every household has a "Man in the Iron Mask." One who keeps themselves stashed away in their room most of the time who rarely comes out to see the light of day other than to eat, smoke, or leave for work. Now we move on to Justin, the construction worker. He's a pretty agreeable guy, but he's rarely home. When he gets home from work he showers and likes to go see his daughter. He drives a Camaro leathertop convertible. The paint job is nice, but the year is not as classic as he likes to think it is. It's just another mid to late 80's, they're a dime a dozen. And now Arthur. He's the one I see the most and is a very cool guy. Him and I talk a lot and have a lot to talk about. In the evening we'll often pop a beer on the deck and sit in a lawn chair and hold conversation. He's a student from Russia, and does have a pretty thick accent. He allows me to poach his Clearwire internet in his absence. I tried to float him some bucks for letting me do it, but he won't accept it. We've got comcast internet coming soon anyway. But since he won't take my money, I'll go ahead and mow the lawn for him next time it's his turn. He's a nice guy, but he is Russian afterall. You never give those guys an opportunity to hold you hostage.

As far as new people go, not a whole lot there yet. It's hard to meet people when you work almost 60hrs a week. That's why I'm glad you guys down there are staying in touch. I've met one girl up here recently who is really cool, but happenstance has disallowed about 75% of the engagements we set to plan. We went to a comedy club together called Upfront. It's owned by Ryan Stiles. Just do a google image search, you'll probably recognize him from Drew Carry and Who's Line is it Anyway. Ryan lives up here, and does frequent standup there at the club as well. He can often be spotted eating dinner at a Restaurant called Haggens.

The roads around here are really nice when there's no construction and people aren't driving like speed limit fearing pantywaists. A lot of times when I have some free time in the evening and Arthur's not home, I take a drive out to the Nooksack Reservation just to have a nice 12 mile little drive on Mt. Baker Biway. It's a really scenic road, right Wallibus? The commute on I-5 to and from Seattle is a little more aggravating, mainly by the fact that I can't pass semi rigs in my car. Sure, I can go fast enough to pass them, but the windwake that flows around the trucks at freeway speeds is enough to knock my car around the way a foot knocks around a ballsack. If the road is wet, that windwake causes my car to loose grip of the road and hydroplane. Hmmm... I wonder which direction I'm going to drift off to this time... but other than the fact that my car is small, it's still holding up great. I've only had one other problem related with my vehicle since I came up here, and it's nothing mechanical. I found some unwanted stowaways in my car. Well... not in the car thankfully, under the fender. I discovered a wasp nest. A full spray assault of Raid was initiated, and hopefully that should take care of the problem. The can is still pretty full though, so I'm going to take the time to spray it out a few times over the next few days to make sure the bastards are gone for good. Raid has gotten me into trouble once before, but only at work about 2 years ago. We had a fruit fly infestation in the bathroom when the boss let somebody use it who dumped a shitty diaper in the trash can. Yeah, fruit flies came from that. I shook that can of raid and I sprayed that bathroom down real good. I guess the raid had settled on the floor overnight because the next morning I got an angry phonecall from the boss who had slipped on it and bruised her side. Some call it Karma.

For those of you who read this all in one sitting, you get an A for Effort.

9:10 PM - 4 Comments - 2 Kudos - Add Comment

Every Girl Ever
Current mood: amused

Knock knock

Oh hi, how’s it going? It’s me! Every girl ever. I’m really looking forward to this date. I’m not nearly as attractive as you remember me being because when we met the bar was dark and you were drunk. Come on in.

Let’s start off with the unavoidable tour of my incredibly typical post-college-girl apartment.

You’ll notice that I went ahead and purchased everything that Ikea and Pier 1 have ever produced. There’s my decorative birdcage over there even though I don’t have a bird, and there’s my gay wicker basket with bamboo poles in it. I don’t know what the hell that’s thing’s all about, but I bought it.

Hey check it out, I have more candles in here than a Roman Catholic Church. Doesn’t it smell like Hazelnut!? If I were to light all of my candles at once you could see my apartment from space! I fucking love candles!

Come on into the living room.

Oh, I see you met my cat there. That’s "Freddy Paws Jr." Why don’t you pet him and act like you like cats even though you hate cats? There you go. Oh, he took a little swing at your eye there huh? Yeah, he’ll do that. Hey, let’s check out the kitchen.

Hey look at my refrigerator. There are pictures all over it! Look at all these pictures of me and my equally vacuous friends from college! We were so crazy! You can tell we’re really good friends because our faces are all pressed up against each other like that.

And check it out, we’re holding up alcoholic beverages to the camera in every single picture. That’s to prove that we were partying. College was so fun! But of course I don’t talk to any of these girls anymore because now they’re all bitches.

Let’s go back into the hallway!

Hey, before we leave I’m going to go in the bathroom for ten minutes for some mysterious reason. Why don’t you sit awkwardly in my big, stupid, round papizan chair over there while you wait for me. It’s like you’re sitting in a hug! Be right back...

Sorry that took a half an hour, I don’t know what the hell I was doing in there. Let’s go!

Wow! Thanks for opening my car door for me! I’m totally going to blow that meaningless gesture out of proportion and delude myself into thinking that you’re a really good guy because that’s what I want to believe.

Well, here we are at the restaurant. No thanks waiter, I don’t need to see a menu, just bring me some expensive things. Hey I know, while we wait, I’ll tell you all about my unspeakably boring job. I hate my boss. He’s a jerk! I might get another job. Maybe something in pharmaceutical sales.

Now let’s talk about my family. I love my family. I want you to love my family. I want my family to love you. I want you to make love to my family! I want you to go golfing with my semi-retarded brother Travis. That would be so God damned cute!

Wow! I can’t believe I ordered all this food! I have no intention of eating any of it. No thanks waiter, we don’t need a box. Just throw it out.

Hey, I’ve got an idea, let’s go to a bar and have an after dinner drink! It’ll be great, it will be just like how we’re drinking here, only it will be louder and we’ll have to stand up. Come on!

See, isn’t this better? Oh hey, what a coincidence. Look over there! It’s a group of my friends that I knew was going to be here. Let’s go over there so that they can judge you!

Hey, I have to go to the bathroom for a half an hour again for some reason. You can stay here and talk to my unbelievably hideous friend Christine! Christine’s so ugly she scares kids! Talk to her! She has a job and a family that she wants to talk to you about too. Be right back.

I’m back! Sorry I was gone for three hours, there was a line. I want to go home now.

Well here we are at my door again. This was really fun for me and not you. You should pretend like we’re going to do it again sometime! Maybe I’ll see you at Target a few months from now and we can avoid eye contact because you never called me. Here, have this awkward goodnight kiss that’s as empty as my soul. Good night!

12:21 AM - 0 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

OMG!! Cellular Stalker!! LMFAO!!
Current mood: amused
Category: News and Politics

I was watching the news on King 5 this evening, and they were running a story about how a "cellular stalker" has hijacked the phones of a family. The stalker leaves voicemail messages with death threats. Furthermore, the stalker is able to see everything in the room by spying into the room through the phone's camera!! The family called Sprint, their service provider and Sprint said, "That's not even possible!!" The department of Homeland Security is getting involved. Wanna know what I think? Read the message I sent to Channel 5:

Greetings,
 
I've worked in the cellular industry for a little while, and I can confidently tell you that this claim does not check out. Sprint's claim is absolutely correct, that what the "hacker" has supposedly done by "live streaming" via the cellphone's camera is entirely impossible. The camera is completely independant of the phone's service and will work without service. The camera is unidirectional and contains built in firmware that is not remote operable. It cannot work both ways. It can only be operated from the phone's menu itself, again independant from service. Furthermore, phone cameras themselves are low resolution and "tunnel visioned." If the phone is laying on the table, the camera is facing upwards towards the ceiling. It would not have the capability to view "everything on the table" as the mother mentioned in the story. The only way it could get a picture of something on the table is by having the camera directly pointed at it. The phone they had in the news story your team broadcasted was the Sanyo 6600 a.k.a. The Katana. This phone is a slim design similar to The Razr, which the bottom portion of the phone is not symetrical to the rest of the side of the phone. This phone cannot sit on it's side. Therefor it cannot view objects on the table sitting stationary.
 
The other interesting thing is how these voicemail messages appeared on the phone without the phone ever ringing. If you call in to your Sprint Voicemail, you can record a voicemail and send it to any voicemail box on the Sprint network without that party's phone ringing. It would just appear as a voicemail to the other Sprint Customer without the phone ringing. You can even send voicemail messages to yourself. This would explain as to why the calls kept "tracing back to her own phone." Since Homeland Security is involved, I think they are simply going to find that it is a stunt by one of the daughters. The voice on the "threatening voicemails" was raspy yet female. The woman decided to switch from Sprint, but she shouldn't blame the network. I'm sure the hammer will fall on one of her undesciplined daughters.
 
This is my take. Unlike the "stalker" claim this scenario is more likely. And also unlike the "stalker" claim, this scenario is actually possible.
 
Thanks for your time.
 
-Kevin Finger

11:43 PM - 1 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

Seattleites Can Sleep Knowing They're Safe!
Current mood: amused

Here it is Seattleites! You can all sleep at night knowing you will wake up in the morning. We no longer need to fear terrorists sneaking in to the Puget Sound through our waters! The U.S. is sending an elite anti-terrorist squad to our region! Meet the Fearless Defenders of the Sound!

Meet Seabert the Sea Lion and Flipper the Dolphin! Flipper's role in the anti-terrorism project is to detect swimmers and divers through it's amazing Sonar Power! The dolphin will then drop a beacon to alert the squadron of Sea Lions to the whereabouts of the intruder who is probably suspiciously searching for Sea Cucumbers and Shell Fish.

The Sea Lion's role is more dramatic! Because these bastards are not afraid of attacking. They will carry special cuffs attached to long ropes in their mouths, and they will attach them to the leg of the suspicious underwater spulunker. The person in question will then be reeled in by his leg, where he will then be met by none other than:

And believe me folks, Roger has very persuasive means of interrogation. Nobody lies to Roger and gets away from it. With a glare of his evil eye and a shake of his moustache he breaks the spirit of terrorists. Believe me folks, with this team behind us we can all rest assured knowing we are being kept safe by the best. What? Don't believe? Click on Roger the Moustache Walrus to read the article!

11:12 PM - 0 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

Snow Day Chronicles 2nd Installment
Current mood: hungry
Category: Friends

Last night I stayed at the Home of B.Starr and homies. In the morning I was interrupted by calls on my cellphone by my boss asking me if I can come to work today to open. I ignored these calls and went back to sleep. It had been a long night of fun, and rest was needed. After I woke up, Borba was already gone. I thought he had gone to school, but no way. He had gone to the mall with Boyette. And knowing Borba's luck.... his truck would not start.

I loaded BStarr and Yosefu into my car, and we went to the Mall to pick up Borba and Boyette. All these guys are fairly large, and 3 of them had to fit in the back of my tiny hatchback. Me being the skinny guy, would normally have to sit back there, but now the I'm the Chauffeur, I'm driving. We took Boyette back to his place, and I promptly took Borba to work in Lake City. The roads were still icy as hell, and I was sliding all over Lake Forest Park.

Borba got to work, I hung around for a little bit to talk to the old crew. Me and Yosefu and BStarr left and headed back to BStarr's. Yosefu and I headed out soon after to go to the bank and then out to lunch. After that we bothered Scotty at the Shack, and I drifted into one of the parking spaces perfectly like in a Bond movie. After chatting, back to BStarr's place, where we waited it out.

Me and Yosefu drove up to Lake City to pick up Borba. Then it was off to the Alderwood Mall to try and get the truck to start. But no such luck. And some old guy in a truck wasn't making it any easier. Pretty much just kept stating the obvious. No real help there. He kind of pissed us off. Then he got in his truck and pulled out. Then he pulled back up, we tried towing it with his truck but the rope snapped. In vain, we parked the vehicle to be left overnight and try again tomorrow.

And now back at the Home of BStarr again, the 2nd installment is ending just like the 1st. With an ice cold beer.

10:29 PM - 0 Comments - 0 Kudos

Snow Day Chronicles
Current mood: pleased
Category: Friends

So today was the start of a perfect mix for road disaster, first an inch of ice pellets layered the road from an ice storm following a relentless snow flurry. The total recipe for people getting stuck on the road. I closed down shop and went home and got something to eat and then I went over to B. Starr's place. All he had was diet soda, so him and I piled into my little Festiva and drove down to the safeway to go get some regular stuff. Afterward, I dropped him over to my friend Boyette's house where he had left his Durango because it was having a hard time on the icey slopes. He got into his car and drove it back to his place, while I went into the lower block of the neighborhood and did donuts, drifting around on the ice. I decided it was time to go when I drifted into one of the neighbor's lawns. Oopsies.

I got back to B. Starr's, and Borba was just arriving home. Yosefu, Borba and I piled into my Festiva to go into the parking lot of a nearby soccer field and do more donuts, drifting all over the parking lot. We got out and had some fun in the snow, and took a picture which is soon to be posted on my pics page if it is not up already. I pushed Yosefu almost knocking him over, but that man knows balance. Couldn't quite get him off his feet. He relentlessly chased me until he was able to peg me in the face with a snowball.

The next quest was for gas. My car was loaded with change, about $20 worth. I piled it all up and took it to the coin star, and changed it in for cash. Borba was picking up beer and snacks there as well. We ran into Boyette who was working, and  since the delivery truck wasn't able to make it he was stuck just tidying up all night. He asked me to go back to his place and get his phone and his Zune mp3 player, which I told him I would after I finished my errands. We went to go to the gas station, where I put $15 in my tank, and lent Yosefu $5 for some quick fast food at Jack in the Crack. Some asshole behind us had his brights on behind us, and we flipped him off out the window until he got the hint. We pulled out of the parking lot and onto the road and there was a Chinese kid on the sidewalk with his thumb out wanting a ride.

I passed him, but then my heart grew 3 sizes larger. I guess it's that damn time of year, and there was still one more seat open in my car anyhow. I turned around and pulled back into the parking lot and asked him where he was going. 227th and Locust he said. Perfect. We were heading to 228th, just one more street down. This wasn't out of the way at all. I told him to get in, and we took the slow drive on the icy road. We were talking to him, and his name is Jun and he is a Microsoft employee. I think he owes me some bootlegs. He had left his car about 3 miles away because it got stuck going up the hilly Juanita Drive, and walked damn near 3 miles to this corner. And it was about another 3 miles to his destination. Glad I stopped.

We dropped him off and cut on to 228th to get to Boyette's place. I went in and grabbed his Zune and his phone and brought them back to him at work. We then drove back to B. Starr's place which he shares with Yosefu and Borba, listening to the music of Justin King the whole way back, and now we're sitting around the living room enjoying a well deserved ice cold beer.

How's that for an evening?

1:17 AM - 0 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

Finger's Hatin' on it now
Current mood: annoyed
Category: Life

This evening my good buddy Mr. Means poored me a glass of hater-ade and now I'm gonna go off on everything that pisses me off.

Dust, noisy eaters, people who flap on their cellphones on the bus, strangers asking me for change, John Pettybone, key chain credit cards, NY Mets, cream corn, people who stare, shitty landscapers, building without building permits, fruit flies, Will Farell, customer service, Japanglish, door to door missionaries, posers, people who's faces just plain piss me off, Kangol hats, prefaded jeans, emo boys who wear their sister's jeans, girls that wear 13lbs of makeup, heavy pungent perfume fragrances, Jessica Simpson, Wal Mart, overcast weather, horse radish, men who wear blazers with blue jeans (Everyone who does this is an asshole), people who make up stories just to top you, airplanes, airline food, airline seats, children behind you on the airplane kicking your seat, airline movies, stewards, stewardesses, people sitting next to you on the airplane who have the air conditioner on the whole flight, Reality TV, rap music, Gilbert Gottfried, Drew Carry, Kevin Trudeau, The Natural Cures They Don't Want You To Know About by Kevin Trudeau, Infomercials, late night reruns, children playing in the street, tricked out rice rockets, relit cigarettes, people who don't cover up when they sneeze and blast their face spores into my breathing air, forgetting my wallet at home, people that shop in my store and load up the counter with items they want to purchase but realize they forgot their wallet at home, tobacco/alcohol vendors who don't check id, McDonald's, and people who ask me "Are you okay?" when they were the blatant cause of my distress. All of those things I'm hatin on.

11:37 PM - 6 Comments - 2 Kudos - Add Comment

What I Want
Current mood: depressed
Category: Romance and Relationships

I'm so tired of investing with no return. Investing heart, money, body, soul, love, everything. I don't mind investing all of these things, but the catch is, is that I need something in return. It doesn't have to be money, it doesn't have to be sex. The one thing that I want in return is the feeling that I'm important, the feeling that I am appreciated for what I do. Do something for me to take the questions out of my mind, put my fears to rest, and do something for me to show me that you care at all. I want to feel like I am a part of something special. This is something that I have been lacking in my previous relationships, the sensation that I matter, the sensation that I'm more than a free dinner, a free  vacation, or a free piece of jewelry. I am willing to do so much for a person that I care about, but I long for the feeling that I in turn am cared about. If I love somebody so much that I need them, I can't be driving down a one way street. I need them to need me. If I feel unappreciated, or unimportant, I begin to draw conclusions, just like every other person in a relationship. I need the basic things. The simple things. The beautiful things. The important things. Why is this so hard to find? Sure, I've thrown a few back before I've written this, but that just brings me to the plain truth without reservations. A relationship is like an investment. If I'm going to invest in stocks, I'm not going to invest in companies that I know are going under, and are not going to be able to give me any kind of a return on my investments. This is just like a relationship. I am tired of being the only one to try, the one who spends all the money, the only one who puts forth the energy and effort to make things work, just to get nothing back. I'm tired of feeling like I'm humping a door.

9:00 PM - 0 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment