12:14 AM - the past or not .. i think not.. :P

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mp19xd1iblE..:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" />

oh this song

so many memories

& yet no matter how far back that part of my life is

somehow I still cant help turning around & taking one more glimpse

just to see if I'm still there stuck in the past

with a love that was too deep

so deep you'd think I was drowning

and I don't know why

but I think its because I long for that deepness once again  

still no matter how much I try to give to what was before

there's just nothing left there anymore

I guess that's why they call it the past...

sad but true

the past is the past

whether its for me

or you

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6:16 PM - life sucks
Current mood: gloomy

He told me I was beautiful

As he gave me fired burning words

Like a silk blanket onto my skin

Comferting me deep within

And the words I love you slipped threw an army box

As the tears came down like heavy burning rocks

With each letter and each word that he said

Carved and ingraved in each tear on my bed

So let the mexico heat come like the color red

As the anger flows there in my head

And my voice was cracked

My typing a mess

As the fear came back

While new words sunk in

Like the color black

And there before my pritty eyes

I read his words

I will have no time to be by your side

And then I knew that he had lied

As I laid awake with the starts that night

Rememebering all those specail thing he said

Now carved and ingraved in each tear on my bed

ps im going tothe mexican fair now!!! thats why im all happy :P

ps: its the next day and the mexican fair wasnt fun when i got therer one of the first things i saw was someone that looked like matt... then i spent the rest of the night whatching my mexican american cousin riding rides i even was asked to go on a few with him so i was nice and said yes and just sat there smiling on little tinny kids ride and as he screamed for more ... oh i did go on two rides of my won but one wasnt very scare the othere kinda scare but it mostly hurt with all the moiving and bars and stuff plus i was on it alone by myself.. yeah

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4:42 PM - sunrise & sunset moving at a fast speed
Current mood: cranky

ok well hope you like all

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5:35 AM - my poem for matt
Current mood: satisfied

I can feel it in my heart

And I'll never let it go

As it tingles all the way

Down to my soul

And I know I can feel it

Because it seems so real

As I sit and wait

For this love to reveal

To open full

So happy wide

Because I know

I have nothing to hide

Wishing for me and you

Wait for it all to bloom

Like those wedding roses

With a fire in June

Filled with

Hot summer days

And cold winter nights

That's what I long for

With you by my side

As I hold our love

Deep in my pride

So let the world give us there lies

Because no tears will I cry

With there stones covered in dirty words

Hitting there

At the curve

At base

And at the end of my feet

Because I know in the end

Our love will run deep

As I watch it flying oh so high

Past the sea's

And Past the tree's

And past those clouds

There in the sky

Farther and farther

Into the night

Past the moon

And Into that space made of light

Linked with all those start in our eyes 

As I stand in the crowd with my head held high

Full of all those who don't believe

As say to them

Loud with a scream

Fuck you too

This one's for me

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9:48 PM - a song
Current mood: calm

i just came up with a song and im not all the way done it also might change from here and there but yeah its contery so read it and tell me what ya think i'll record my "not to good at all" singing so you know somewhat how it sounds sorry if my voice makes your ears bleed lol but yeah tell me what ya think ok? good cuz it goes like this

let me steal you away / for a midnight kiss
and I'll steal you away / for eternal bliss
cuz your the thing / that I really dooooo miiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiss
when your away / from lovin on this

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8:15 PM - the future
Current mood: indescribable

From dusk till down

I shall feed on the sprit

The sprit of hope

That shall rain upon

The coming of the darkness

That sweeps the clouds

Those clouds that shift ever so swiftly

Over the burning of a city so bright

So embrace yourself

And let the natures of life

Spring forward into the future

With fulfilling hope

And smiles so bright

They over shine the sun

And may all your light

Be very so real

And never so fake

But only true to heart it's self

Because of the journey

That lies beneath

The growing shadow

That breaks eternal

From each appearing distant light           

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3:26 AM - bryan im coming over :P
Current mood: sick

I can feel myself spinning

The music plays

So loud in my ears

As I close my eyes

Headphones pressed tight

Against my head

Against the waves

Of my beating heart

Side to side

Sound to sound

And there I see it

Inside my head

The streets

As I walk

Along the cold

Hearing the cars

Driving down the road

Side to side

Sound to sound

With his bedroom

Opening up

As if I am already there

Watching him lay

Turning each page

Turning off

The connection box

And walking trumply

Out the door

Just to smoke

That cigarette

With the voices of

A happy giggled girl

Filled with So much laughter

Coming from A child's face

As it surrounds the room

Around the walls

From heavy tickles

Reaching oh so far

Side to side

Sound to sound

Hearing the cars

Driving down the road

Watch me go

Here I go

Walking

Listing to the music

That beats to each step I take

As I close my eyes

Walking

Walking to find you

Because I miss you so

So watch me go

Here I go

Go

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12:15 AM - who am i
Current mood: productive

When we wake

I'm in your daydreams

And when we sleep

I'm all you'll ever see

And in the mornings

I'm the lipstick stain

On your cup of coffee

And in the afternoon

I'm the cent of

A lingered cigarette

And by night fall

I'm the hug in your bed

And I know everything

Inside your head

I'm your joy

I'm your sorrow

I'm your love

I'm your pain

We are alike

We are the same

I hold your secrets

I have your name

I am the one

That keeps you sane

Threw the winter

The summer

The fall

The happiness

The pain

Threw it all

And one day

You'll see exactly who I am

So face the mirror

Just to look at your hands

For will love you

Better then any man

Past the ocean

And past the sea

Because my love runs forever

And one day

You'll see

 I am you

And you are me

So Love me forever

And don't let me go

Because deep down inside

I need you to know

One day you'll see

That I'll love you forever

Because you are me

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9:55 PM - yes dear
Current mood: content

You slide your hand against my heart

You caressed it softy at the start

I felt so weak

I fell apart

Breathless and yet

I was still breathing

Against your chest

As you looked at me deeply

Hidden with

"I love you Deb"

Letting your words

Whisper

Slip

Out of your head

Into my ears

As I looked at you deeply

Hidden with

"Yes dear"

And in my mind

I love this so much

Is all I could hear

So turn down the lights

And let them go low

With your arms around me

100 times fold

Not too tight

But surely very slow

As you savor the moment

Watching me glow

Just to feel my skin

Just to feel us breathe

Deep within

Your arms around me

So in my thoughts

Is were I begin to plead

Don't ever let me go

For I don't want to bleed

Because inside you

Is where I felt so weak

It's where I fell apart

Right from the start

And after that

I knew you had my heart

Because in your arms

I felt so weak

I fell apart

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1:15 AM - yesterday
Current mood: good
Category: Writing and Poetry

I cried yesterday

and so I cried

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