the hardest lessons to earn (everyone read me)

did anyone ever tell you that life wasn't fair. well its no. Life sucks as we know it. because well right now im not in the best of moods and could quite very well snap at any moment. im about to the fuck it stage.any way this has to be the hardest lesson to lesrn and thats tha life isnt fair.

the next is get the fuck out of lala land this isnt some fairy tale with the princes and knights and dragons and the bullshit this is life and things arent going to change because you say i dunt like it.

then threre is acceptance this is the hardest to learn becasue it takes time. you have to accept the things that are not in your control witch sucks but the world would be one fucked up place if i could control everything.

then theres honesty. with should always be the best policy, but i have foud out the hard way that just because your honest dosent mean that everyone else is going to be.

then my favorite and the one that i have learned from a very young age is that money dosent matter. its only good for one thing and thats causeing problems. now im not saying that i dont need it or dont use it buit just i dont put to much stock in it. if i have it im gonn give it to someone else or spend it on someone else.

and last but not least forgivness, this is the one that gives me the most trouble i can forgive almost anything done to me. but on the flip side of the scale i have to also forgive myself and thats the only way to be set free. i have to forgive myself but for some reason or another i find some way to not do it. anyway thats the top highest for me itmay be diffirent for you feel free to comment and add your own hard lessons learned.

By the way feel proud of the lessons you have learned and the lessons yet to come and above all have a great time on this the third rock form the sun. i can asure you that our time here is far to short to be mad all the time and if you are mad then try to snap out of it soon dont spend to much time on it. and that gose double for me.

Yours Levi

9:19 PM - 1 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

Pour Another shot Barkeep
Current mood: lonely
Category: Life

Yeah i know you dont know me very well but if your willing to listen a minute or two. My name is Levi and im suffering from a broken heart. So pour me another shot sir if you would. I know that I have never been in here before. but im kinda drunk and want to get this over with let me tell the story of ho i got my frist purple heart. Well ot all started when i was 18 years old i moved in with my grandma. (sweetest lady youll ever meet!) I went out on a friday night with my friend mikey, so how about another shot sir. Thanks, now me and miky were tight, I mean he was a very good friend of mine. Now he proably dosent ever want to see me again, but thats besides the point. we walk in to the bowling ally and I see the prettiest gril that i had ever seen. Her name wont be disclosed due to privicy reasons. how about another make it a stronge burbon. fuck it just leave the bottle. now where was I she was bowling with her friend Jessica, and we got to talking I got her number. by this time i was smitin. we started to see each other everyday we were doing everything that cuples did and as a result we started dating and things got serious we had been together for about 3 months when one day she ask me to move in with her. (I take a long drag from my smoke and pit it out then a 6 second shot from the bottle.) from ther on things were great we spent chrismas that year together then her brithday. And we were doing freat or so i thought........

(I finish off the bottle) well it was march and i was about to turn 19 in july i was tossing around the marrage idea. I was gonna purpose on my brithday but as you can tell we didnt make it there. Well after her brithday I was still living in her other house with her and i come home from work to find a letter on the table saying that there was someone else. And at that moment I could feel the world crashing down to the ground. (How about another bottle ) I beleive that was the last time that I cried.(alittle tear wells up in my eye as i take a long swigg of the new bottle) I went into a rage. i could see nothing, hear nothing, I felt my heart start pounding. The blood rushing through my body I felt my heart freezing over. Over the next few days I was immune to my feelings. then when i couldnt tak it anymore i went off the deep end i became distructive. It didnt matter ro me who you were if i needed to do it i was going to do it drugs then followed. i became self distructine and absorbing it all in. i had mad love for this gril and if couldnt have her i was going to end i all. i felt alone and cold. my life had no meaning. I was done living and then one day something happened that changed it all. i got into some trouble. And it saved mylife. i wasgoing to kill myself slowly i didnt want to deal with my pain anymore and by getting into trouble i forced to face things correctly. and now(as i finih off the second bottle) i still cant hardly talk about this grill and i still think of her alot. its funny here it is almost three years later and im still in love with that girl. I dont know how to move on from this but whaever I guess thats why i am the way i am with women.

                                       The broken hearted man            

3:16 AM - 0 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

Disappointment

Disappointment is the feeling of dissatisfaction that follows the failure of expectations to manifest. Similar to regret, it differs in that the individual feeling regret focuses primarily on personal choices contributing to a poor outcome, while the individual feeling disappointment focuses on outcome. It is a source of psychological stress. The study of disappointment—its causes, impact and the degree to which individual decisions are motivated by a desire to avoid it—is a focus in the field of decision analysis. as disappointment is one of two primary emotions involved in decision-making.

i just wanted to make sure that everybody or anybody that happened to stumble on to this. that they knew exactly what disappoitment is. and now to the chesse of this here blog.So im disappointed in how my life is going at the moment kindadepressed about it but theres nothing i can do i just can't win for losing. its been this way for a long time it seems that i can take a step forward then fall on my face. with everything i cant make up my mind i cant seem to figure out whats going on in this head of mine i need to find something i have been sreaching for i thought that i found it once but i can't seem to figure out what i need to do to get it. i make the ecuse that i work to much that im not haveing fun or some other bullshit but the truth is that i find myself in a constant state of meditation. tring to figure out this problem and why i cant i dont know.

my head tells me one thing my hreat tells me another my consinace says something else. my head is all fucked up.and im rambling again but anyway thats my update im still fucked up i have a headach i can't find someone to talk to about but sometimes bloging helps me but i dont think its gonna work this time i have got to know whats going on with me. its driving me nuts.

2:12 AM - 1 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

im such a loser......
Current mood: guilty

So yeah..... life is funny i think everything is going to work out then life throws a curve ball and hits you in the face. well now i am riding home with maggie and nic. And a sudden realization came over me and i feel horrible about it. I am many things and perfect no matter how much i try to be i am not. I have made many mistakes and i regert alot. I hold many resentments against myself for most of my life. I have done many things that i am not proud of. So all in all i feel pretty bad about hurting and saying most of everything i have done in this life so far. But as of right now im going aspire to be more then i am at the moment. I live my life one day at a time and try harder then before to be who i want to be rather then what i have made myself out to be. For all those that i have hurt i am sorry and i hope that you can forgive me easier then i can forgive myself........

10:49 AM - 1 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

why?????
Current mood: lonely

well there is this girl that i really like and at the moment it feels as though my heart is breaking. I know what to do she knows i like her hell the way it seems to me is that i love her. I think about her constantly and it kinda scares me that i feel this way. My life seems to spiroling down and its all crashing but at the end of the day i can only think about her i hope she reads this but i dont know for sure if she will or not but if she dose then she know that im talking about her. Were not dating were not together in way i have formed some kind of un spoken bond with her though i can feel it when she not around i find myself sad and alone i have been tring to contact her all day but her phone for some reason or another wont get my txt msg. And it is driving me mad. i mean batty or insane i feel as though it has been ages since we last saw each other even though it has only been one day. if anyone reading this has some advice im open to suggestions. Anyway i guess thats enough of the rambles form me

9:00 PM - 0 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

Here’s to a Great Life......
Current mood: adventurous
Category: Life

Well, i haven't been on in awhile and just wanted to write something while im sittin here. My life is ghoing great now a'days. I have recently came to knowledge that I will be going back to school in January. I'm following my dream and if anyone gets in my way then FUCK YOU! Im going be go9ne for awhile after i get out of school i was excepeted into the School of Moible Dynamics in Arizona. So that should be great. Then Im going to texas to window tinting school.I miss all of my old firends but i feel that they would only stand in the way of my dreams and what I aspire to be cause what i was before is not what i wanted to be but a product of the world i was in and the people i was around and if that offends anyone who may be reading this then you know what you can do is stick that oppinon streight up your ass cause i feel what im doing is the best for me now at this moment. anyway its time to go and see that great big world out there i think that you should proably do same.

                                              peace out for now!

                                                        Gob

6:47 PM - 0 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

I Aspire To Be More Than Me.

Today Is Not A Good Day....................................................

11:56 PM - 0 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

Proud To Be A Stoner
Current mood: amused

Yeah, Ya Know, Sometimes Its Kind Of Confusing To Me,
All These People Sitting On Their High Horses,
Looking Down On Us For Smoking A Plant Or Growing A Plant.
Well I Believe In Natures Laws, And I Just Wanna Be Free.

From The Mountain Tops, Where The Wind Blows
To The Green Valleys Down Below.
Where The Snow Melts And The Rivers Flow
I Just Want To Live My Life.
Where The Trees Grow, And The Air Is Clean.
Where Nature's Free Do To Her Thing, Everything Is One If You Know What I Mean.
I Just Want To Live My Life.
Im Proud To Be A Stoner, Im Proud To Be A Stoner, Im Proud To Be A Stoner.
Yes I Am, For The Rest Of My Days.

I Started Smokin Weed At The Age Of 18,
I Moved Out My House Started Writing Rap Beats.
I Moved To Hollywood, We Was Up In The Scene,
It Was Dloc, Johnny Rich, And My Home Boy Steve.
We Was, Teenagers, Yeah Living A Dream.
Lookin Up To Daddy X, Tryin To Do This Rap Thing.
Wrote The First Couple Songs It Was "Bump Bump" We Was "So High" Gettin Blown Off The Skunk.
Got the 15's In The Trunk Down Melrose,
Bitches In The Club, Gettin Drunk Spittin Flows.
Tryin To Get A Record Deal, We Gettin Signed.
I Was Broke With No Money, And That Was Back In 95.
Im Proud To Smoke Weed, And Im Proud Of What We've Done.
Im Proud Of The Kings, And Im Proud Of Everyone.
Im Proud My Name Is Dloc, No Joke Son,
And I'll Be Proud When Im A Dad, When I Have A Daughter Or A Son.

From The Mountain Tops, Where The Wind Blows
To The Green Valleys Down Below.
Where The Snow Melts And The Rivers Flow
I Just Want To Live My Life.
Where The Trees Grow, And The Air Is Clean.
Where Nature's Free Do To Her Thing, Everything Is One If You Know What I Mean.
I Just Want To Live My Life.
Im Proud To Be A Stoner, Im Proud To Be A Stoner, Im Proud To Be A Stoner.
Yes I Am, For The Rest Of My Days.

Its Those Lazy Days
And The Hazy Days
And The Days We Get Stoned For Just Days And Days.
Its Amazing When We Get To Live This Way, Like Every Day Is A Holiday.
At The Harvest Time, When The Work Is Done.
And You Celebrate By Worshiping The Earth And The Sun
We Always Give Thanks, For Life And The Gifts.
The Higher You Climb, Its Always The Higher You Get.
You Gotta Disconnect, From All The Pressure And Stress.
The Traffic, The Smog And The Pains Of Rent.
If Thats Real Livin, Its Not For Me,
I Wanna Be Free, And Live In Peace, Come On.

From The Mountain Tops, Where The Wind Blows
To The Green Valleys Down Below.
Where The Snow Melts And The Rivers Flow
I Just Want To Live My Life.
Where The Trees Grow, And The Air Is Clean.
Where Nature's Free Do To Her Thing, Everything Is One If You Know What I Mean.
I Just Want To Live My Life.
Im Proud To Be A Stoner, Im Proud To Be A Stoner, Im Proud To Be A Stoner.
Yes I Am, For The Rest Of My Days.

Im Proud To Be A Stoner, Im Proud To Be A Stoner, Im Proud To Be A Stoner.
Yes I Am, For The Rest Of My Days

Another Version Of Life Lived, A Different Set Of Meanings
Another Way Of Thinking, A Different Type Of Me.
A Brand New Religion, One That Has Never Been Rehearsed
But Its Cursed, And This Curse Could Mean The End Of This Earth.
So Many People Worry About The Troubles That They Got At Hand
To Many Simple Solutions To Restoring This Land
And When Its All Said And Done,
And Were Gonna Tell Our Kids That We Did The Best We Could,
But We Know That We Didnt.
Its Gettin Crazy, Summers Hot, When Its Freezin.
Hurricanes Getting Stronger Tearin Up The Southern Regions.
Big Fires Taking Lives, Its Pure Destruction.
Were At A Fork In The Road, Time To Choose The Right Junction.
Before Theirs Nothing Left,
We Need To Stop This Regression.
Get All The Leaders Of The World Together In A Session.
Only Thing, If Theirs A Shot That If Our Kids Would Thrive In A World That Is Growin, I Just Wanna Survive.

From The Mountain Tops, Where The Wind Blows
To The Green Valleys Down Below.
Where The Snow Melts And The Rivers Flow
I Just Want To Live My Life.
Where The Trees Grow, And The Air Is Clean.
Where Nature's Free Do To Her Thing, Everything Is One If You Know What I Mean.
I Just Want To Live My Life.
Im Proud To Be A Stoner, Im Proud To Be A Stoner, Im Proud To Be A Stoner.
Yes I Am, For The Rest Of My Days.

Im Proud To Be A Stoner, Im Proud To Be A Stoner, Im Proud To Be A Stoner.
Yes I Am, For The Rest Of My Days.

Currently listening : Cloud Nine By Kottonmouth Kings Release date: 28 August, 2007

5:15 PM - 1 Comments - 2 Kudos - Add Comment

So It Went Something Like This...

Jesse and I got an Xbox 360 and halo 3 this week for our house. We been pretty much playin that non-stop. We are getting pretty good if I do say so Myself. Really not much going on this week I started on my brother and sisters Chrismas today I hope they like, (and that the parts that i need come in.) Im happy to say that All my other chrismas shopping is done.  

3:14 PM - 0 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

A Brother’s Love

A brother's love is steadfast; a brother's love is true
Forever supportive, strength from within is always stemmed from you
A brother's love gives you that hidden warm embrace
It affords us all the privilege of both time and place
A brother's love protects us from all things that are bad
Our hearts connect in such a way that times are never sad
A brother's love will always fill our minds, bodies and souls
They are the part of our family that makes this family whole
A brother's love, it lifts us up to plateaus never known
Regardless of the spoken word the love is always shown
A brother's love is loud and bright
It is that miraculous thing of life
A brother's love just soothes your soul
It wraps you up and makes you whole
A brother's love is unconditional; a brother's love is pure
A lifelong bond that will forever and always endure
A brother's love wipes away your tears
It urges us through our many fears
A brother's love is beautiful and kind
Forever withstanding the sands of time
A brother's love brings a smile to our saddened face
It eases the pain away from this everyday place
A brother's love opens your heart
Because of your life he is a part.

1:55 AM - 0 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment