Pre-nup creativity

Pre-nuptial agreements may not be romantic, but they make sense in their own way. And now I've decided they make even more sense. It never would have occurred to me to include a clause about blogging, but apparently them New York lawyers have figured the time is right. We live in interesting times. . . .

http://www.nytimes.com/2008/04/18/style/18divorce.html?em&ex=1208664000&en=d3a4a4fe76856306&ei=5070

3:38 PM - 9 Comments - 8 Kudos - Add Comment

Daddy by design

As some -- perhaps all -- of you know, my children don't have a father. It has recently come into Will's mind that I could go out and find one. Here are the criteria he has listed:

1) Yellow hair (which he later said was optional)

2) Be nice

3) Be able to beat the sixth level of the Lego Star Wars video game.

I am currently accepting applications.

3:34 PM - 23 Comments - 18 Kudos - Add Comment

Trust

Ok, I want to know. . . are you someone who trusts too easily or just the opposite? Or are you one of those mythical creatures who has somehow found the middle ground?

4:59 PM - 20 Comments - 14 Kudos - Add Comment

So, I was all set to tell this funny story . . .

. . . about a sexual escapade I had this weekend involving the cracking of a head board, but then I read Mr. Jones incredible blog today. Check it out:

http://blog.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=blog.view&friendID=793619&blogID=351995931&Mytoken=020CED7E-A7F0-478F-9062B0E67E47183C65435556

5:44 PM - 22 Comments - 18 Kudos - Add Comment

Insight request

Ok, yet again what I think is a unviersally accepted concept turns out to be way more subjective than I once believed. Humor me, beloved friends, and fill in the following sentence for me: "You know a girlfriend/boyfriend/partner/wife/husband is high maintenance when ________."

I don't want to give an example because I don't want to color your response. My guess is your gut response is going to be not only insightful but also highly entertaining. Thanks!!!

8:56 AM - 23 Comments - 17 Kudos - Add Comment

A heretofore unknown bias

Last night I was writing in my journal (yes, I do that), and I came to the realization that I just might have a bias against dorky people. I have never dated, co-habitated, nor married a dork. None of my friends are dorks. Some of my family members have dorky moments, but even they are not true dorks. Now mind you, there is a huge difference between dorks and geeks (in my mind, anyway). Geeks are really smart, and often quite cool. Dorks, while often smart, are completely devoid of cool.

So, this got me to thinking, "Am I a bigot? Do I, in fact, hate dorks? And if so, what does that say about me? What kind of shallow idiot avoids people who simply lack any semblance of cool?" Apparently, this shallow idiot.

I have already mentioned to a few friends that I think my oldest son (age 6) is quite likely headed to Dungeons and Dragons territory. He's going to be one of those kids. And I'm ok with that. Those kids are usually "good kids," and I'll have a whole lot less to worry about. He may be socially ostracized to some extent because of this, but that will only be because geeks (and their subtle coolness) aren't truly appreciated until they hit college. Now, having said this, what if he (gasp) actually turns out to be less geek and more dork? I can't even bring myself to imagine such a thing. Which is yet another indication of what a shallow idiot I am. How the hell did this happen? How did I get to be 46 years old and still have the prejudices of a 15-year-old? And how did I get to 46 without knowing this about myself?

And so, here I sit with this self-realization. I can feel my metaphorical heels digging in already. I don't want to change, I already know that. I don't want to embrace the dorky people of the world. I don't want to waste any of the time I have left on this planet being bored without just cause (i.e., a paycheck, family goodwill). So maybe THAT is my real bias. I don't like boring people. I really, really don't. And that, dear non-dorky friends, ain't ever gonna change.

10:00 AM - 13 Comments - 12 Kudos - Add Comment

Genetics and our roles in society

My whole life, little kids and old people (aka seniors) have stopped me and asked for my help when they are lost and/or discombobulated. I've never given it much thought, because that's the way it's always been.

Well, yesterday a very nice 80something woman couldn't find her car in the Raley's parking lot, so she asked me to help her. And I did. Like I always have and always will. And for the first time, I started to question, "Why is it me these lost folks of such disparate ages decide to approach?" I decided it could only be one thing: my face.

When my father's sperm made its way into my mother's egg and the choice was made about what this mug of mine would look like, my mother's genes clearly won out. I'm not a beauty. Instead, I have what is euphemistically called a friendly face. When you're a teenager, this is sometimes considered cute, but I, of course, wanted a classically pretty face (and straight hair, and a boy named Stan Hough). Now, however, I'm starting to appreciate this face because of the cool kids and seniors I've had the chance to randomly meet over the years. (Next time you see Christi Marshall, ask her about the guy with Alzheimer's on the beach and she'll paint the picture for you.)

So, that led me to thinking: If this is the role my face has dictated for me to play, what roles have other people been assigned based on their faces/genetic makeup? I'd love to hear your self-assessments on this one.

11:24 AM - 23 Comments - 14 Kudos - Add Comment

Stages of Life

I had a friend tell me once that you know where someone is on their musical development path when they realize that Frank Sinatra is brilliant. Having come to that point already, I thought, "Well, yeah, of course."

This summer it occurred to me that taste buds may be like that, too. For example, I never quite understood why people waxed euphoric about the taste of homegrown tomatoes. Heck, Guy Clark even has a whole song about it. I think I lumped that into: Old People Stuff. Then, this summer, in the height of the tomato season, in this town made solely for the growing of said fruit, I had one of those moments. And yes, that tomato came from my backyard. "Now, I get it. . . ." I thought, as the taste exploded in my mouth. "This is indeed some good shit."

So, does that make me old? Yep, I think it does. And me and my happy taste buds are just fine with that.

9:50 AM - 15 Comments - 11 Kudos - Add Comment

My fatal flaw
Current mood: hopeful

Over the years, my friends have told me my expectation that people should just do the right thing is naive. Actually, "stubbornly stupid" is the phrase they use most often. So when that awful thing happened to me at work recently, I told my immediate boss and a few of my colleagues that the only way things would get better is if someone in senior management apologized. "Don't hold your breath," was the universal response. So, I tempered my position to wanting someone to acknowledge that things could have been handled better. "Don't hold your breath," they said once more.

Well, I mulled on this, and even took a short vacation. And still, stubbornly stupid girl that I am, I couldn't shake the feeling that an injustice had been done to both me and my boss and pretending it didn't happen was nonsensical.

Fast forward to yesterday and what was supposed to be a 15-minute meeting with a member of senior management. I sucked it up, and made a future-thinking proposal. It was half-heartedly received, but that didn't bother me. She did, however, open the door to discuss the recent events. The details are meaningless, but something key happened. I actually heard the words, "I apologize. . . "

The clouds didn't part. The chorus of angels did not sing. And yet, somehow, things got just a little better for this stupidly stubborn Pollyanna who will continue to hope that people will do the right thing.

9:24 AM - 8 Comments - 8 Kudos - Add Comment

Well, I almost did it
Category: Music

Tonight I was going to sing in public. And then my babysitter got herself a life. So no country karaoke with the Alkalai Flats for me. And I'd been perfecting my Patsy Cline/Kitty Wells numbers, too. Ah heck.

8:39 AM - 11 Comments - 8 Kudos - Add Comment