Metaphor
Current mood: apathetic

I have many starts but no finishes, to my writing.

What happened to me?
Ever since Death took my grandfather, I haven't been able to cry since. When it comes to loss....I feel a lacking, remorse, sorrow but no tears flow.

Death took my wet tears and waters the Deadly Night Shade.

Even when I broke it off with my lover after two years of planning a life with marriage and kids, I didn't even weep when I watched him drive away but I wanted to.
I guess there is something amiss in me or maybe I know that death and loss are not infinite, even if they seem that way in this world.

Surely, as an impatient motorist flashes their head lights and tailgates to let you know that your a horrible driver, than speeds along side you and cuts you off, as if saying with no words, "fuck you!" as they speed away, leaving you to choke on their dust.
I feel this is a metaphor for my life.

12:10 AM - 0 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

Gazing up at oblivion
Current mood: amorous
Category: Writing and Poetry

Gazing up at oblivion,
And the stars....
One by one poking through the veil of darkness.

She lays there,
The smoke drifting from her cigarette
Like a moving sentence in white cursive,
Scattered by the passing breeze
Too fast to read as the smoke drifted from her finger tips.

She was the beginning and the ending of her ALL,
With her body on the ground
Her soul within the stars
Her eyes within the moon
Her heart within the sun.

Her being,
Her essence,
Like the stars in the coming night
Peeking through the muddled dark
To shine within the night.

1:50 AM - 0 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

I’m no....
Current mood: crappy
Category: Life

I'm no Emily or Eli,
This don't mean a thing,
And this doesn't mean I'm going to try.
Being rejected gets me closer to destroying you from the inside.

There's just no place I can fit.
Maybe its infatuation,
Or maybe your the best of whats around.

I feel you crawling through my veins and I can't push you out.
I can't run you out of my thoughts, because your already two steps ahead.

And I know I'm no Emily or Eli
So I'm not going to try
Because I know I'm the last in line.

Given time the glamor will wear and tear, then I won't even notice you standing there.

I can't be them and they're not me.
I can't be the one to give you what you seek or need.
All I can be is this person you barely see.

3:00 AM - 0 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

Myspace.com Blogs - Wait a minute. - Lavish Mentor MySpace Blog
Current mood: amused
Category: Life

http://blog.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=blog....

I was inspired and tired when I wrote this, so its not great but it reflects how I felt when I saw this person and the infatuation and the rejection of feelings not returned then trying to shy away your emotions so they can never see you crumble.

3:22 PM - 0 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

Wait a minute.
Current mood: awake
Category: Life

My breath caught in my throat and my heart just stopped for a moment.

Wait a minute....

I swam freely in the world in my head until you invaded it. Then you became part of it and my heart and lungs felt full for the first time in ages. Living under the white drifts of snow I've never seen but felt always as a cool breeze surfacing my core.

I took a breath.

Wait a minute...

From then on you were always a song drifting in and out of my ears and out of my lips. Like a broken record it kept skipping your name in my head like a drum.

I searched for silence.

Wait a minute...

My eyes full of your form, a vision imprinted in my mind like a black and white photograph etched there to gaze upon. I watch you move in the distance like a moving painting with odd angles and bright colors ever enfolding each other in tandem as the scenery changed.

I looked away.

Wait a minute....

I wait but you do not think of me, you did not hear my plea, you do not look at me but I wait.

Just waiting for you to come to me, for you to hear and see me. The minutes pass like an hour glass. Wait a minute to forever, and every hour dripping like honey off a spoon into an empty cup.

3:38 AM - 0 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

So far
Current mood: blustery
Category: Life

 A premature life crisis sent me to the middle of nowhere in New Mexico tending to the care of wolves. Now what?

You run away from the things that comfort you and tie you down, then pack up what matters in a purple duffel bag, a few trinkets here and there. Cluttered in a tiny box, memories of lives loved and past regrets. Drive towards the rising sun that never sets.
I'm here and that's what matters as much as matters go.

I came here to learn, I came here to listen, I came here to understand, I came here to write. So far not a chapter, there's a muse I have to capture and I've searched under every bottle that has passed my way by a comrade sitting near the campfire our eyes blazing, flickering like stars in this never ending stretch of New Mexician sky.
Our laughter can be as loud as thunder in an otherwise quiet night.

Sometimes I feel that I am just another statistic, just another girl running away from something. Life, maybe. Love, probably. Death, definitely. All will reject or claim me sooner or later.

11:20 PM - 0 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

Part 1
Current mood: amused
Category: Blogging

Tonight was the dark moon, the night was warm and windy which was appropriate for the season yet it felt empty and dark like the inside hallow of a giants belly.
I gazed out as far as my eyes could see, thousands of blazing little lights stretch along the city scene, mimicking the stars which were shinned out by the artificial light.

I wasn't sure if it was just my melancholy mood or maybe I actually did sense the impeding dread of something dark coming. It was not the darkness per say more like the vast emptiness that only gazing up at an infinity of sky stretching up and out to galaxies, worlds away from this one could make an individual feel so insignificant and helpless if it all came crashing down over your head.

1:56 PM - 1 Comments - 2 Kudos - Add Comment

Vicking Poem
Current mood: crunk
Category: Life

Blonde, fair, and cold. Sweep the sea's, crashing shores, armed with iron ores.

Hear the ancient cry of the Northern winds, time to rape & pillage again.

When the light fades, when the day ebbs away, our fire will light the way.

Hear us cry over the roar of the sea, see our eyes cold and blue as a winter sky. We've come to watch you die.

Wild we, come in three's to rid the new world of its disease.

5:05 AM - 0 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

Nameless

You call upon the names you know but its mine you’ll never utter - I keep mine sacred, I keep mine safe.

To know the name you speak gives power over the person you seek- A summoning, a calling prayer, a willing bind that they adhere.

Keep it sacred, keep it safe. Speak not of your true name for others to cry unless you want a spelling bind to whom will abuse it thru out time...

I am the nameless

2:07 PM - 0 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

I am and I am not
Current mood: obsequious
Category: Writing and Poetry

12:42 AM - 0 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment