|
Masters of the Universe?
Arise thine children of the 80's!
Was it just me or did Masters of the Universe get a tad predictable?? Yes even as a wide eyed, hyperactive 7 year old i got a bit tired of the mindless body slamming, the endless "where's Prince Adam.." routine and the innane seriousness of the Freddie Mercury-esque, moustouchoied Man at Arms and his bloody words of advice.
Ill give you a typical episode:
Its a dark and threatening day over purple and blue hued Eternia. Skeletor and his trusty henchman, the gaudy looking Beastman and pal, Merman are plotting an evil plot for domination and a life of luxury on the ever bright and cheerful looking world.
Miles away, the ever omniscient Man at Arms gets wind that something is brewing and inform's his mate the King that they need to be worried. Teela, possibly the weakest herion in ink, finds out and lets Prince Adam know. I love his pink tights and Pantene cultured bob by the way....(that annoying twat Orco is usually around there somewhere too..)
At this point, Beastman and Merman start getting up to no good as only they (and the audience) know how to. This is terrible. Whatever will the terrified inhabitants of eternia do?
Enter the man who holds aloft his magic sword and says....... (you know this one...). Thats right, He Man appears with a flick of his golden locks and a flex of biceps that Hulk Hogan would die for. He races in, on Battlecat to find the terrible Beastman and Merman and goes to work.... UNTIL!
A trap is laid and He Man is snared, taken away to Snake Moutain to meet his grisly fate at the hands of the bony one. He Man is tied up, unable to escape. The tension mounts. Skeletor enters and divulges his entire plot to He Man AND the only way to foil it. With a cackle and a shake of the well defined jaw, he's off leaving Beastman and Merman to have their way. (this is big for a 7 year old, its gripping...)
Will He Man be put to death?? Will be maimed and tortored? No. The Scorcess (remember the bird lady with the nice figure) helps him break his binds. In a flash and a flex, the tanned one is free. Breastman and Merman are alarmed and go on the attack. They are no match for He Man though, he picks them up and does a terrible thing to them Does he run them through with his sword? Does he subject them to all manner of sordid things? No he throws them in........ mud!!!! Agh the tyranny of it all.
After this there is usually a confrontation between Skeletor and He Man, whereby He Man foils Skeletor's evil plot Skeletor again flees back to Snake Mountain. He Man lets him go so that they can have another rumble down the track.
To cut a long story short, the next scene is back with Man at Arms and the rest of the village people. They are relieved to be saved by He Man again. Then comes that predictable and altogether annoying joke of "Where's Prince Adam?" He enters and claims have been asleep although he saw He Man on the way in. Oh, you terrible rascal you!
The show is concluded with Man at Arms' thought of the day: "In todays episode kids, we saw that He Man didnt trust his friends and let them down. This meant that when He Man was in need of them they were not there and........"
Who needed mind altering drugs hey??
11:35 PM
-
0 Comments - 0 Kudos
- Add Comment
|