8:27 AM - Unfinished (a poem)

My scars, the life stories told by tattoos that cover me,
vixen - raven haired sensitive soul,
I may not have a lot but I breathe integrity.

There is no box nor boundaries I can be kept in,
my abilities are endless when I let them,
Let us not forget, she preys -
the queen of cubic zarconia rings and fancy material things,
she comes in the form of a green headed monster with highlights in her hair,
harsh words, riddled riddles of long past despair,
and I win.

I am not all but one, seconds racing and a minute is forever,
if I stick my head in the oven can Ms. Plath tell me the weather?
Harshness with a soft touch, like a newborns butter-like whip,
another door I have passed though... only to remain sick.

Paranoia! Revolutions! ....in your own backyard come with heavy pay,
but let us pray this second time around,
gather the stones for circles and sticks for wands of words beyond,
she gazes into her anger to spite her face,
a subletting Medusa of the subhuman race.

© Lisa Vicious 2008

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8:51 AM - Freedom From Sin (a poem)

Bottlerocket eyes,
Lips of Morphine and Cotton Candy pink gloss,
a firm round ass,
a small belly of jelly,
and breasts that would make chicken's blush,
I taste of wine,
both a lover and a fighter,
I am me.

I surround myself with few,
happier alone but never lonely,
shocked by none but those who know me,
never letting my guard down,
I know me.

Heed my words, engorge yourself in my poetic lust,
my fuck-it-all efflorescence and fine bone China heart,
eat my Cancer like communion and be free..
true freedom is freedom from sin
(freedom from within),
or so the billboard read.

©2008 Lisa Vicious

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1:59 PM - Encrypted Genesis

There is a spy in  the house of St. Rita,
a messenger to deaf to communicate heavenly charity,
backstabbers arranging game plans passed off as decor..,
shrouds, blown wind from the ass of God,
where did the time go?

I have failed as a teacher if I cannot believe in myself.

There is only Light when your eyes reflect off me, the mirror.

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12:53 PM - 7 steps to becoming wise (essay)

7 STEPS TO BECOMING WISE.

Step one (1) is to admit you know nothing at all. Those who unwilling choose to see the bigger picture will usually take offense and attribute that step to their own self-consciousness and even say they 'aren't stupid'. Nobody said you were.

Step two (2), with the above being realized, is to really look at yourself - body, mind, soul. When you see things as they are you will be able to transform your life on every level; this also coincides with step (3).

Step three (3) is easier said than done. Give up your ego. Now with this people become confused, but the step is really very enlightening and beneficial for yourself and everyone around you. When you start to view every situation individually, you will see 2 sides to it. One, being your ego's point of you; and 2 being reality. The ego will always do what's best for itself even at the expense of others.

Example: Am I writing this to help others or in hopes that I will receive gratification from others so my ego gets fed? Which is the ego speaking? This is something you should ask yourself in every situation and you will be amazed when you make the right choice how much light you will bring into your life.

Step four (4). Live! Live! Live! Do NOT merely exist and go through the motions.

Step five (5) is to obtain as much knowledge on every subject possible. Never box yourself in by what you think you should know and never say that you will never use said knowledge. You will. Call it another version of "the art of war", knowledge IS power.

Step six (6)....do not believe a word I've said. There is a difference between believing and knowing. Belief leaves room for doubt, but if you know within your very being that something is the truth, then you should base you life skills upon that.

Step seven (7), the final step. Always remember that this is your life, every second you waste and clutter with unwarranted drama and discomfort, it brings the value of life for everyone down. When someone wants to include you in their drama, regardless of who that person is, you need to ask yourself one question...

"Is this what I want my life's value to be?"

If your answer is no, then you are doing what's right. We all want to help others at times but there are limits to how much chaos you should allow into your life. Be polite and remind the other person, that this is effecting your life not only theirs and respectfully decline the intrusion.

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12:52 PM - Finding your path to self-realization (essay)
Category: Life

Identify.
Uproot.
Transform.

With these 3 ideals, you can change your life. People often ask themselves "why me?" "why this?" "why now?"; why isn't the question but rather the answer. By identifying the root of ANY issue, you can change the whole situation.

Self-realization is the act of realizing YOU KNOW NOTHING. This is when you can start to transform your life. The tools you use are up to you, but remember that before you can start any work, you have to identify the root of your issue. If you really examine the cause you will see it leads back to you... part of realization is finding out that you are the only one who can allow outside forces to make you feel, act, react, and live a certain way. Take control.

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6:30 AM - If Life was a musical, this would be my opening song (a poem)

Everyday I wake up,
it's all about perception
what the Hell's up?
you're just part of my invention
Sleep a little more,
I'm under a doctors discretion
but believe me Sir, YOU CAN DO WHATEVER YOU WANT TO DO...

Blessings are realizations of prayers that have been answered,
you may not be enlightened to the fact that you're already dead,
just listen to the voices in your head,
you're twitching and turning, and gasping for air,
you, keep...looking for somewhere better to go...
but
you're already there.

Just because you don't understand it, doesn't mean it's not right damn it!
There's a million ways to be saved...
but
only one small step off of the edge,
will help you fly with wings of less,
isn't that more?
So place your bet, the time has come,
you are surrounded by everyone...
what's it gonna be?
So, what's it's gonna be?
It's gonna be a great big show with clowns and liars,
angel's dancing on desire,
and my epitaph will later soon read,
"she gave her ego to help the others,
left her pain in the fire,
she never expected anything in return,
just knowing that her voice was heard".

©2008 Lisa Vicious

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3:17 AM - Sadist’s Lullaby (poem)

Fire. Ravens. Marching forward...time keeps moving on.
There seemed to be a mix-up in the red brick house near dawn,
but slowly changing, ever changing, elevated minds,
I curse you, under, my breath deeply...
now the time has come,
with claw marks, bruises, bitten ankles, hearts bleeding from men,
you had your chance now, real big chance, now you must lie in it.

There was a day then, back in the day then, I would sit and wait,
so quietly, so naively, so stupid with my grin...
you gave me things like diamond rings and some form of PTStressDisorder,
while you watched me cry,
then one day, that hot June day,
I realized I was wrong,
how dare I let a little man with petite hands play me like a song,
a bleached blonde junkie drunk with abortion papers,
an OCD Nazi,
a schitzophrenic voodoo dollie,
oh, and Mommy Dearest to boot!

I shot them all in my head,
some hung by a noose of their own hair,
I watched them fall, one and all...
here are the crosses I bare.

© Lisa Vicious 2008

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10:56 AM - Paradise Lost-n-Found

I am as moral as a blade of grass growing in your Dandelion junkyard,
"I love you, I love you, I love you, what's your name (game)?",
You bare a striking resemblance to fame...
This time I'm not afraid,
I'll be your crucifix, your lust, your education on Bipolar Homo-orientation.

We'll let it rain. Cuz there's something so pure about it.

We grew a garden made of fear, guilt, and angst,
that was the day the roses died in my hand,
such a terrible thought, my dear,
what happens in the garden – stays dead.

You'd left your calling card on my pillow after you fucked the pain away,
listen here buddy, I'm not a one night stand,
if I wanted that good of a pain pill I'd use my right hand.


It's all about you isn't it? Sweet psychotic angel wearing couture sheep's clothing,
how humble as if your train had detoured to Sanity-ville.
With Hounds of Hell at my feet I swear to avenge my innocence without despair,
and you voodoo doll temptress will be struck down by the hand of Nemesis.

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6:21 AM - Censorship on my [bleep]

Wow! I can't believe how many people have dropped off my list since this morning due to my cooter offense. You would think the black box censoring my female parts would be enough. I honestly don't get it. As I sit here working on new merchandise and placing orders for books, I wonder, what is it people expect from me?

I am honest. I am strong in mind and soul and if I had to would easily take out anyone in my way. My anger, my pain, my words used as weapons and therapy are praised and inspirational but a godamn photo of me throwing the Hank III sign and a black box on my crotch is offensive.

This is one comment that was left for me:
I really hate this picture of you, it does not become an author of a poetry book that was just published. I am certainly glad that there is a black rectangle over your twat!!! I would appreaciate it if you would use another more befitting picture, Geez Lisa where the hell is your self respect. You are Thirty Years old, and you are not the same Person that was being raped by the step-father.
Please keep crap like this in your bedroom where it belongs, behind closed doors your personal pleasure!!

Now, normally I don't mind being criticized, hell, I encourage it but fuckin A, Linda, you have pissed me off. Yes I am 30 years old, and although I am clean and sober and living a different life than what I did 2 years ago, I am no angel.
Also, get your facts straight. I was NEVER raped by my stepdad. And further more, at no time in my Life have I ever used my childhood abuse as an excuse to do stupid shit. I found my way to being a jackass all by myself.

You sit here and praise me, and write poems you say were about me and inspired by me but your eyes take in only what you want to read. Nobody who reads my blogs really knows me excpet for my husband. I have self respect, I have clawed my way  out of HELL to be where I am now and am using my gifts to help people, so how dare ANYONE ask me where my respect is. My respect is towards those who respect me, and if you feel the need to be a two faced crazed fan of mine, I don't need you. You take me for all I am or don't take me at all!  I'm not in this for fame or money and guess what, I am NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR YOUR CHILDREN! 3 people have asked me to change my photo due to minors seeing it. Not teen minors, but 2 and 3 year olds...what the hell are they doing looking at my page anyway?

Once upon a time, I did change for people. I cared what people thought, but now that is fleeting. I REFUSE to change for anyone, I won't even change for my own Grandparents. Even in his last few weeks my Grandpa had tried but I didn't give in. Life is to fucking short to try and please others and deny yourself your God given rights to think for yourself and be comfortable in your own decisions.

I am SO glad I offend people, because it fuels me. It makes me a better person, a stronger person, because I won't use their insults to sabotage my work negatively in any way.

I am a strong, beautiful, amazing, kind, thoughtful, and vicious woman. My creations are from the soul, from a place you will never see the likes of.  So, before anyone else asks me to change my default photos or do anything for you, really think about it, are you that fucking special that I would actually do what you asked because YOU are uncomfortable?  Ummm....NO.

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4:51 AM - Morning Piss (2008)

Festering images.
Using words as incendiary weapons,
a Molotov Cocktail of vocabulary to be exact,
there is something special about that plan,
some fateless ride through an emotionless Disneyland,
passing time watching the same Mickey Mouse hat wearing
assholes go by.

But I'm not angry,
living well is the best revenge and I must say,
for trailer park trash - I am living pretty well.
Sometimes I think my honesty is too much for people to take,
to much to completely give away,
but deep down,
I ain't selfish. I am as unvicious as they come.
Alright, I'm lying, I can be crude and painful,
wise and down right hateful,
but I do it with love in my heart.

There are those neh sayers who tried to put ol' Miss Vicious in the ground,
but you can't keep a blue blooded Hellbettie down.

 

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