"Pray our military men and women who are striving to do what is right also for this country — that our national leaders are sending them out on a task that is from God. That's what we have to make sure that we're praying for, that there is a plan and that plan is God's plan."
"Pray our military men and women who are striving to do what is right also for this country — that our national leaders are sending them out on a task that is from God. That's what we have to make sure that we're praying for, that there is a plan and that plan is God's plan."
NEITHER FUNNY BIKER NOR HARD WORKER IS WOMAN'S RIGHT MATCH
DEAR ABBY: I am a woman living with a man, but "in love" with another man whom I formerly dated but broke up with because he's an alcoholic. "Spike" is a true biker -- exciting, funny and fun. Our lifestyles didn't mesh, so I made the decision we shouldn't be together. I miss him very much, and it keeps me from being totally committed in my head to the man I live with.
I believe I have commitment problems. I am a psychiatric nurse with 30 years' experience, so I've heard it all and know what I should do, but the issue remains. My boyfriend, "Cal," is a hard-working man with little education who earns very little and cannot help support me. We met when I weighed 300 pounds and had low self-esteem. Still, Cal loved me as I was.
I am a post-gastric bypass patient. I now realize that our lives are very different, and I'm having a hard time accepting that we are meant to be married. I hate the thought of not doing the "right thing" by Cal. I have been faithful. When will I grow up and be able to make the right decision, Abby? -- CONFLICTED IN CALIFORNIA
DEAR CONFLICTED: If you think that "doing the right thing" by someone is to marry him knowing that he isn't right for you, please let me point out that to do so would be a huge mistake. From what you have written, it is clear to me that you have involved yourself with two men who are not suitable for you -- and for the reasons you stated.
While you may be in the mental health profession, it is important that you find a mental health professional who can help you come to terms with the person you have gone through so much to become. I predict that after you do, you will begin making sounder decisions about many things, including whom you want to spend the rest of your life with.
DEAR CONFLICTED: It is understandable that you don't want to date the "funny biker." You probably don't enjoy spending you Friday nights robbing convenience stores. That's fair. Regarding Cal, it sounds like what is happening is that your gastric bypass surgery has allowed for you inner asshole to blossom. You're getting sassy, your fitting into your old Jordache jeans and your thinking you might be able to snag a more profitable boyfriend. I say go with it. Your new thinner self is looking for a paycheck and heaven forbid your $25 (my estimates, I know that with the nursing shortage it has to be at least that) a hour job doesn't do it. How do you expect to get a face lift on that? What about buying your new boobs? What about all of those shopping trips to Talbots? This economy needs consumers. Go find yourself a sugar daddy to sponsor you.
Alright people, I am so moved by the acceptance speech of Sarah Palin that I decided to invite you all to madlib your favorite parts of this glorious piece of work Here's the deal. Take your favorite part of the speech, pull out one noun and one verb. Then plug in your own words! Hilarity!
I'll do the first part:
I accept the call to help our nominee for president to serve and promote fascism.
I accept the challenge of a fixed fight in this election against confident opponents at a crucial hour for our stock holdings.
And I accept the privilege of manipulating with a man who has come through much harder missions ... and met far graver challenges and knows how tough fights are won — the next poacher of the United States, John S. McCain.
It was just a year ago when all the experts in Washington counted out our nominee because he refused to hedge his stake in the fleecing of the country he loves.
With their usual certitude, they told us that all was lost — there was no hope for this candidate who said that he would rather win an election than see his country end a war.
SEATTLE -- The King County Republican Party booth at Seattle's Bumbershoot festival was vandalized late on Sunday evening, party officials said. Vandals tore open the closed tent, flipped over a table full of literature and lit part of the display on fire. A person at a nearby booth saw the fire and put it out. "This incident sadly obscures what has otherwise been a great experience for us at Bumbershoot," said party chairman Lori Sotelo. The party has had a booth at the annual arts festival for the past five years. Party volunteers gathered on Monday to help clean up the booth.
Currently
listening
:
Chariots of Fire
By
Vangelis
Release date: 2006-11-13
We both know you read my blog. I know you're probably sitting in your million dollar house drinking wine that costs more than my gross income thinking "I am so intimidated by the talent and beauty of this woman that even I, who can have any stripper on any day of the week, talk to this woman?"
This is what you do, Lindsey, is you come sing me this song (minus the last part which was probably hot when you were younger, but now its creepy:)
Please consider doing a duo with James Hetfield. That would make my aging rocker fantasy come true.
If you message me, I'll tell you where I work and you can bring me flowers to make all the other women jealous.
We both know you read my blog. I know you're probably sitting in your million dollar house drinking wine that costs more than my gross income thinking "I am so intimidated by the talent and beauty of this woman that even I, who can have any stripper on any day of the week, talk to this woman?"
This is what you do, Lindsey, is you come sing me this song (minus the last part which was probably hot when you were younger, but now its creepy:)
Please consider doing a duo with James Hetfield. That would make my aging rocker fantasy come true.
If you message me, I'll tell you where I work and you can bring me flowers to make all the other women jealous.
"Sweet Deal.... I just bought a new home in a upscale location Near the Grove. I'm have an extra room for rent and during these hard times. And if you don't have the rent money that month? Im sure we can work something out orally:) please be a hot cuttie cuz I'm a hot guy. Pleased attach of photo of you and I will do the same."
DEADBEAT OWNERS ABANDON PETS AS WELL AS THEIR HOMES
DEAR ABBY: I work for a major lending company and have cleaned out foreclosed homes. Too many times, I find animals who have died from exposure or literally starved to death.
My message to homeowners is: PLEASE make arrangements for your pets if you can't take them with you. Once a loan company notifies you of foreclosure, it can be many weeks before someone enters that home. Give your pet a fighting chance! -- DISCOURAGED IN ILLINOIS
DEAR DISCOURAGED: I'm pleased to pass along your important message. If living arrangements change, your family pet should not be abandoned or dumped to fend for itself. Contact a rescue group so the animal can be placed for adoption with another pet lover or a shelter.
DEAR DISCOURAGED (Lizzy's Response:) Sadly, I'm not surprised by this. Obviously, if they signed a mortgage based on a variable rate believing that this "KICK ASS INTEREST RATE is going to last forever, they're probably not known for being the sharpest tacks in the box. They probably don't know that animal shelters are free. They probably DO know who has won the last five American Idols. That being said, you should send them a gift bag full of cockroaches. Cockroaches are the perfect pet for people who can't handle responsibility. You don't have to feed them, walk them, or clean up their poop. They'll eat anything and will never die.
After a long day at work, I walked out to find that my tire is flat. I've never had a flat tire in my life. I do not know how to change a flat tire. My first instinct was to call my mom so she could change it. Not having my cell phone and being 1300 miles away prevented that such thing. I walked back up to the office and ran through the list of people who would feel obligated to bail me out. The first being my brother. I quickly called Matt, and this was the converation:
"Hey Matt, what are you doing?"
"Nothing, about to go get some Pho."
"I need your help, I've got a flat tire" (I paraphrased that because the shock of the following interaction erased that memory)
"Where are you?"
"I'm at work."
"Where's that?"
"Harbor Marina, I'll tell you how to get here, it's real easy."
"Don't you have AAA?"
"No."
"Now is not a good time."
That ended the call. I don't have triple AAA, but I do have full coverage insurance. I was hesitant to call them because it might take a up to 8 hours for the truck to arrive. This stranger (PERHAPS TOWTRUCK RAPIST!!!) is going to help me, while my brother dicks around to get PHO. After I get my tire changed I'm going to quickly administer a beat down to my older brother.
*ADDENDUM*
Tow truck driver is still not here. I called my insurance company, and he called back. This is the conversation that we had:
"Hi blah de blah Pilcher?"
"Yes"
"I come down to parking lot and you not there!"
"I was outside waiting to flag you down."
"I call you. you not there, I drove around parking lot twice."
"I apologize, I was out front waiting for a tow truck. What are you driving?"
"I call you, you not there!"
"Okay, I'm sorry. What are you driving?"
"A black Lexus. You drive Celica? I used to drive one, I didn't see one. I call you, you not there. I come from Southcenter, it will be another half hour"
MORAL OF STORY: Try not to be a 30 year old woman who forgets her cell phone on the day that her tire decides to be flat and her brother is too busy to help her cause he's going to get Pho. Also, being a tow truck driver is lucrative enough to where you can have luxury vehicles.
Special note to Matt: Mom reads my blog, you're going to be in so much trouble.
