Gender: Female
Status: In a Relationship
Age: 38
Sign: Taurus
City: FOXON
State: Connecticut
Country: US
Signup Date:
03/30/05
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Tuesday, June 03, 2008
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Your nobody till some bunny loves you...
Current mood: hopeful
So, Alan and I have taken in yet another bunch of strays. This time, it's orphaned baby bunnies that my brother discovered while tilling the neighbor's garden. He cut down their entire habitat, along with all of their cover from predators, and tried on Sunday to give their mom a chance to come back for them by putting them in a tin pail on its side with a bunch of twigs, leaves and mommy bunny fur... Alan wanted to take them home and try to feed them that day, but Eric was insistent that we let nature take its course, that they were more than likely going to die no matter what. Even if we tried to feed them, their little hearts would race and burst from fear of being handled, he said. He knew some people who have tried and failed, so he said it was pointless.
Earlier today I am mom's and it is HOT out. I decide to check on them... the pail was still there, and the nest was undisturbed. The tin pail was shockingly hot and I assumed the worst. I poked around and felt nothing, so I emptied it out and saw a dead bunny. At this point, I'm fairly certain it is going to be a bleak outcome, but then something jumped. I push aside the nest and there's not just one but FOUR still alive. I scooped them all up with nest in the pail and took them inside. Alan had said that a woman at work was having the same issue and he suggested she buy rabbit food and dissolve it in water, using one of those injector medicine feeder thingies to force feed them and it worked-- the bunny was hopping all over the place. So I went to the pet store, bought some food ($10!!!), a bottle feeder and a vinyl pet carrier with mesh windows to keep them safe from my cats and pugs. Once back to mom's I mixed the solution and fed them-- shockingly, they drank it up and were not at all scared of me. I think they were relieved to not be baking to death at this point. Poor things.
So now they are home, have eaten four times and are hippity hoppyitying all over their carrier. We've been careful not to handle them too much, though they don't seem to mind. They are actually curious about their new life and caretakers, and one of them kissed Annissah (the 9 year old) through the mesh. They are cute as buttons, and not much bigger. I'm really hoping for a happy ending here. My heart is waaay too soft for orphaned animals, and I'm not good with failure in this regard.
The kids of course want to keep them, and if they get too used to the good life of guaranteed food, shelter and safety from predators they may not be able to be re-introduced to the wild. It's a pretty safe bet Alan will be building a deluxe rabbit condo domicile at the new house. I can't bear to think of anything bad happening to my tiny little charges.
L
p.s. In other news, my father did not die. The pneumonia is gone and he's on heart medication. The nurse practitioner said that after he talked to me, "he was like a new man... sat up, watched TV, and ordered dinner." He even changed his DNR to an "R" or whatever. He wants to fix his heart now. They are releasing him to a care facility tomorrow, and he requested my phone number. What on earth should I make of all this?
8:01 PM
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Friday, May 30, 2008
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William Ellsworth Morton
Current mood: calm
I haven't physically seen him since I was 14. The last time we spoke was about ten years ago, and he was drunk and pitiful. He left us when we were young and never contributed any kind of support. Had it not been for my mother's strength and resourcefulness, I don't know where my brother and I would be today. And it wasn't just us... he did it to at least two other young children and their mothers.
He had a bad childhood, sans affection and education. Nothing ever stuck. Foster families didn't want him either. The worst thing that ever happened to him as an adult was his movie star looks-- made conning people way too easy.
Bill Morton is my father, and yesterday I received a call from a Salt Lake City hospital telling me that he is on his death bed. They had a hard time getting any information out of him; at first he denied having any family at all... A persistent chaplain managed to get my name and city out of him, and she found me in the White Pages.
He's had a hard time of it the past few years, apparently. The past six months he's been homeless, living in his car. He never applied for Medicare or Social Security, for some reason, and he didn't seek medical attention when he first got sick. Now Pneumonia has claimed 90% of his lung capacity and he's lost his will to live. The chaplain didn't know if he would speak to anyone, but I asked her to try so at the very least I could tell him that I forgive him, and understand that he had a difficult path that made it hard for him to be there for those who needed him.
We spoke for about 10 minutes, and I updated him on everyone's life, told him that Grandma Lucy had passed and that he was a grandfather to my niece Lorian. I told him I had met a wonderful man and that we are raising his three kids together and would soon be moving to a house in Guilford. I told him that what's passed is past and despite everything I still love him and wish him peace. He said that he had as much peace as he could have, considering everything... and that 'what goes around comes around you know.'
At least he understands that he hasn't lived the most upright life, and his alienation was self-made. I pray that whatever he faces in the afterlife includes fairness and compassion for the little boy in him that was abandoned by his own parents, abused in God knows how many ways, and tossed aside by a society that had not yet learned how to protect lost children. I also hope it includes awareness and awakening to the karmic consequences of his adult choices... how he had the ingredients for true happiness several times over and he walked away, leaving a lot of pain and anger in his wake. I hope he sees what his lies did to my brother as a kid, and how it affected my ability to form friendships and relationships for so many years. I hope he sees our younger sister Shannon's struggle to maintain healthy boundaries in relationships as well.
I also hope he sees how his good taste in women was instrumental in our ultimate victory over our early struggles. Had we not had the mothers we had, we most certainly would have failed in tragic ways by this time....
So thank you Dad for that, and thank you for being willing to talk to me. I guess Eric called you too, and that has helped him to achieve closure. We will not agree to pay for any burial or medical expenses should it be asked of us, and we hope you understand why.
Peaceful Journey,
Your Daughter
7:01 AM
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Tuesday, May 13, 2008
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To My Beloved Stinky Butt
Current mood: touched
Dear Phoebe...
The vet's office called today, said your ashes had arrived.
Three weeks to the day, the last time I cried...
The day we met, I intended to adopt another kitten, and I wanted one that was as beautiful and elegant and smart as Willow. Despite this, I chose you. Why? Because you chose me first. The lady who had the mini-adoption agency in her condo didn't want to part with you. She said, "Oh that one's not ready yet. She's very picky about her food (Fancy Feast ONLY!), and she doesn't really like anybody but me." She said this as you came up to me and pressed your nose against my finger. You were an U-G-L-Y kitten. There's no denying that. You were the runt with the runny eye (that never stopped running, for all twelve years of your life), missing patches of fur around the ears, with a big snaggletooth hanging down. You were perhaps a little cross-eyed too. As ugly as you were, you didn't break eye contact with me the whole time, as if you were telling me that it HAD to be me. I was perhaps the only one who would truly understand and appreciate you. The inner ugly duckling in me responded, and I had to like deliver my best lawyer monologue to get the woman to let you go. Perhaps she knew that you were special, in a Special Ed kind of way... and that you would never be boring.
In so many ways, you were a pain in the ass my Phoebe-cat. OH YES... The garbage tipping; any kind of trash. You NEEDED to topple it over or rip that bag open, strewing the contents as far and wide as possible.
And how about the food fixation, the panic you expressed when that dish was empty? The other cats didn't really care too much when they were fed. They knew it was coming eventually. But not you... NO, you had to have that security, and you had to let me know about it regardless of the hour of day or night. You drove me crazy until you got what you wanted, even though it resulted in a canteloupe shaped body with a pea-head on top. Add the snaggletooth to the mix and you had a pretty funny-looking cat. Still, you were cute as a button.
And then there was the paper problem. Whenever you were obsessing over your food dish you would take it out on my bills, photographs, any kind of paper that was lying around, chewing all around the perimeter until there were little round holes on all sides. I especially appreciated it when you chewed up my uncashed checks. Thanks Phoebe-cat stinky butt.
And at my last apartment where I had plastic blinds on the windows-- it would freak me out how you would lick all of the dust off of them for HOURS at a time. This was usually only after you tipped the garbage and when there was no food present or stray papers handy.
Going the vet was always an adventure. I had to defend you to the entire staff, who thought you were a psycho-kitty. They were AFRAID of you, because you were that out of control PISSED OFF to be touched by these people in this place that was not your home. Those claws were SHARP, and you were a deadly weapon when you were pissed. STAND BACK people! I'm sure the vet staff thought I was lying when I tried to explain how cute and sweet and funny your 'real' personality was... I should have put you on You Tube when I had the chance! Damn.
You never liked change much. Whenever we moved, you became psycho-kitty for about four days. You wouldn't talk to me, and in fact did some physical damage to my person you were in such a state. I must admit I didn't much care for you either during these times. Perhaps I was meaner than I needed to be, but it just seemed ridiculous that you couldn't comprehend that it was OKAY to be somewhere new that included your sister cats and mama bear! Finally, you would calm down, start to purr, resume your nightly position of sleeping up and to the left of my head with your little chin resting on my temple, and all was well once again. Until the next move.
For those who didn't really know you, they may question your less-than-flattering nick name 'Stink Butt'. They don't understand the loving irony of it, that I adored you despite your perpetual stinkiness. I suspected that the off-the-charts levels of litter box stink were mostly your fault, but with three cats it can be difficult to assess who is doing the most damage. Now that you are no longer with us, I finally know the truth. You were the stinkiest of all the butts, and your nickname was well-earned.
Willow and Clara knew not to mess with you too much. Though small and runt-ish all your life, you would KICK ASS in every fight. Willow may have been twice your size, but you came up with a fat wad of grey fur in your mouth every time. She was no match for your alley cat scrappiness.
The last few months of your life were tough on all of us, especially you I imagine. You were so sick, and you still had all of your little obsessive compulsive habits. I tried to keep you contained, because of your butt problem (we won't go into details here, but it was very unpleasant), yet it proved to be very difficult. You HAD to, HAD TO! get to that trash, didn't you? Even the pugs couldn't deter you. It was like your crack pipe. It pained me to take away your beloved Fancy Feast.... dry prescription diet only. You looked so pitiful, and you lost sooo much weight. Down to skin and bones. Less than four pounds at the end...
Oh, the bathroom was so gross during that time, but I just kept cleaning it. I'd give you your medicine as directed, and for a few days you'd go back to 'normal' and would be all skoochy and cute and not quite as stinky, and my hopes would go up. Alan too. He had become quite fond of 'the little shit'. But finally, it was clear that you weren't ever going to recover, and you were suffering too much to justify keeping you here for us.
Despite your CRAZY ways, you were endearing beyond words. There will never be another cat quite like you. Our love-hate relationship was always based in adoration, and I'm sorry for all the times I shouted your name and threatened you with 'YOUR ASS IS GRASS PHOEBE!" when I found the dissected garbage bags... especially the ones with lots of egg shells and coffee grounds. Yeah.
Now your ashes sit in a pretty silver tin with purple flowers on my fireplace mantel, next to the card the crematory provided describing the beautiful place where beloved pets wait patiently for their owners to come back to them... just this side of Heaven's Gate, where the food dish is always full and the season is always Spring. I'm sure they stock lots of Chunky Chicken Fancy Feast, and keep plenty of full garbage pails and stray paper bits lying around just for you....
I miss you, Stink Butt. You will always be with me, in my heart. I will never, ever forget you my little Phoebe-cat....
With Love and Respect,
Your Human Mom, Lara
8:09 PM
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Monday, February 25, 2008
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It’s a PUG Life.
Current mood: amused
Category: Pets and Animals
Watch out! The world is ending. I, a cat person since the beginning of life, actually gave consent to the idea of adopting DOGS. Yes, as in DOG-plural.
Today I had my man pick up our cat Phoebe's medicine (she has a blown up ass and will have to be on anti-inflammatory meds for the rest of her life or have a blown up ass), and it just so happened that the gals at the counter in our vet's office were discussing the rudeness of the old guy who just called looking for a free home for his two-year old pug females. Alan's ears perked up. Free, you say? Yes, totally free. Black pugs, spayed and up to date on shots. The old guy got them for his grandkids but really didn't have it in him to keep up with them when the kids weren't around. Sooo... babe calls me and asks what I think. I was, like.... two bedroom condo, two adults, three kids, three cats, 8 fish and two dogs? Ummm, okay?
So the vet assistants called old dude and left our phone number. An hour later old dude called and gave us directions. An hour after that we walked in the door with our two new babies, the uber fugly-cutenesses that are "Alice" and "Dorothy". Like their namesakes, they are true explorers, and very friendly and excitable. The kids just about lost their shit, which was cute until bedtime when they couldn't seem to pull it together. The cats are not so thrilled, but they are old and basically live in our bedroom and bathroom anyway. The dogs will live in the kids room. Thankfully, they are small and like to sleep in their crate. Old dude gave us everything, including a huge bag of food and two of those cool adjustable leashes.
We'll see how it goes! I will post pictures as soon as I can.
6:32 PM
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Tuesday, January 29, 2008
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Just want to remember this one...
Your Horoscope for JANUARY 29, 2008
 The way that you earn your living may be changing vastly, Lara. Unexpected career breaks may continue to come throughout the year, perhaps to the point where you find yourself in an entirely different profession. Where money is concerned, it may be a case of "it never rains but it pours." After years of being broke, you may find yourself sitting pretty! Continue working hard and let it all come! You deserve it!
Oh God, if you only knew what I've been through in the past month... Currently, I'm studying financial planning and am learning about how to "make money work" for myself and other struggling middle-classers like myself. I'm realizing, the more I read and listen, that I know nothing and nobody I know knows anything either. I'm also realizing that the wealthy and the government like it that way. So, here I go... off to learn the secrets of $$$ so I can share them with you.
We don't have to be financially F*CKED forever! What great news that is.
6:46 AM
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Wednesday, January 09, 2008
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The Puppethouse is C-L-O-S-E-D
..>..>
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| Posted on Fri, Jan 4, 2008 |
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| Safety concerns close landmark theater |
| By Mark Zaretsky, Register Staff |
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BRANFORD — Officials shut down the Stony Creek Puppet House Theater for building code violations Friday, saying that building and fire code violations found in a surprise inspection pose a threat to patrons' safety.
Eighteen fire and 29 building code violations were discovered at the theater at 128 Thimble Island Road, including time-worn electrical wiring that must be replaced, officials said.
Deputy Fire Chief and Fire Marshal Shaun Heffernan and Chief of Police John DeCarlo said the inspection followed a recent police community meeting at which neighbors raised concerns about increased nightclub-style musical performances at the Puppet House.
The building's construction includes wood, and is filled with dozens of flammable puppets.
But Heffernan and Building Official Anthony Cinicola, on whose order the theater was closed, said they do not want to permanently shut down the Puppet House.
"We love the Puppet House —we want to emphasize that and we want it to stay," said Heffernan. "We want to work with Mr. Weil to make the Puppet House a safe place for the residents of Branford and the visitors of Branford to visit for a long time.
"What we don't want to have are the makings of something like the Station nightclub fire a few years ago," he said.
The Feb. 20, 2003 fire at The Station nightclub in West Warwick, R.I., killed 100 people. It was the fourth most deadly nightclub fire in U.S. history.
Owner Jim Weil admitted Friday evening that "there are some violations. There's some wiring that isn't up to code, which I don't consider to be dangerous," he said. "But it's true that it's not up to code."
Weil said he is most concerned about the order that he not go into his own building after dark.
The "shutting down" of the building only refers to public functions. Weil is allowed in during daylight hours.
Weil's mother, puppeteer Grace Weil, bought the building in 1960 and opened the Puppet House in 1963.
Before that it was a silent movie house, a destination for summer-stock actors, and a garment factory.
Grace Weil later brought a collection of handcrafted hardwood Sicilian marionettes, which stand 4 to 5 feet tall, weigh 60 to 80 pounds and are among 300 built by Italian craftsman Sebastiano Zappala at the turn of the 20th century.
In the last five years, the Puppet House has been a busy music venue.
Immediately canceled following Friday's findings was a performance by Sirens & Alarms, a Branford band scheduled to record a CD at the theater tonight, Gullans said.
Heffernan said "a significant amount of work" must be completed and DeCarlo estimated the Puppet House has about $50,000 in electrical code violations that must be addressed.
"We're just asking him to maintain the building" in safe condition, said Cinicola.
"Our goal is to get him back open as the Puppet House and have him remain there for people to enjoy," he said. "We want to maintain and preserve the history for Branford, but our goal is public safety," he said.
"The town of Branford does not want a situation where young people are put in danger in a fashion similar to the Station nightclub fire ... where 100 young people's lives were lost due to unsafe conditions," said DeCarlo.
Mark Zaretsky can be reached at mzaretsky@nhregister.com or 789-5722. | ..>
Ah, some of you know what I went through with the Puppethouse about two years ago. Those famous safety violations were a large factor in my decision not to carry out my plans with The Artsphere. A lot of people put in a lot of FREE work only to be verbally abused by a drunken Jim Weil. Truth is, he needs to get out of the way of that place if it is ever to become anything other than a deathtrap and a hangout for vagrants. It is a miracle that nothing tragic has happened there yet; I hope the town of Branford is successful in its efforts to turn things around. I knew the Puppethouse back in the day when it was a true thriving venue for artists of all kinds; I wanted to see it become that again so I put my neck on the line. Since then (and before me) several visionaries have tried to do the same, only to throw their hands up in shock and disgust when they uncovered the truth about the owner and his "friends.'
We want to believe that if we go forth with the better angels of our nature we will be met with the like and that is just not always the case. Some people don't have better angels...
10:56 AM
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Tuesday, November 06, 2007
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L’Alan Update
I can't complain. Things are good. The house is growing too small, especially two weekends a month when Alan's three kids visit, but I can't complain.
I have this wonderfully receptive, supportive and adoring man in my life, and we're figuring out the logistics of our relationship as we go. The circumstances of our co-habitation were a little (or a lot) rushed and kinda funky, but I had faith that it would all work itself out and it has.
I'm anticipating a move soon, which means I'll either have to sublet or sell my beloved condo. We need four bedrooms, because the way things are going with the nutty ex we're probably going to end up with custody of the kids.
Did I see any of this coming in June of 2006 when I thought I would have too much space for just me... then came Mary-Liza in Sept. and Alan a year later. Along with Alan, the kids.
Whew!
L
10:38 AM
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Thursday, September 20, 2007
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Life Comes At You Fast
Current mood: happy
Wow,
So it's been almost six weeks since we met, but it feels like years (in a good way). He's been living with me for half of it, and it couldn't be going better. He starts a great job doing what he's great at next Wednesday (that resume I put together for him did all the talkin'!) and soon we'll be a two-income household. Can't wait! Things have been a bit strapped lately, but the payoff has been so tremendous in every other way it doesn't bother me too much.
We joined a gym and he's now my personal trainer. It has been a week and I already feel a big difference. He says he can see it, but he won't tell me where until I figure it out for myself. The level of understanding and devotion I have been receiving of late is mind-blowing. I can't believe that the man I have been envisioning for so long actually exists and he thinks I hung the moon...
My days are so much different now; coming home from work is no longer about frozen dinners on the couch and prime-time TV. It's about kisses, workouts and full-course meals at the dinner table.
And my foster daughter is *finally* beginning to relax about the whole thing. Those two get along great; it was me she was pissed at and for a while it didn't look very promising. Now we're all settling into a little nuclear family routine and it's been amazing. I think I need to pinch myself....
That's all for now,
Elle
7:21 AM
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Tuesday, September 11, 2007
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Must Update....
Current mood: enthralled
Category: Life
Okay friends...
Haven't blogged in a while, but there's a reason. I've been very, very busy starting a whole new life with Alan. He came up to help with Branstock and just didn't leave. I got a little spoiled by the wonderfulness that he has brought in spades, so I told him to 'stay put buddy.' And he did. So I'm now officially co-habitating and talking about long-term plans and such.
Mary-Liza is adjusting to the change. The family really likes him, especially now that they've seen him with his kids. They were up for the weekend and we had an incredible time- what little sweetieboos they are! They didn't want to leave in fact. Aside from all of the beach sand in my washer and dryer, it was a perfect weekend and I'm looking forward to having them back (and who knows-- maybe they will also stay for good! Shit! Time to move again? So soon?!)
So he's out looking for work and I'm back at my FT job. So far, it's going very well. Not too stressful yet. On the side I'm rockin' some massages, sex toy parties and catering jobs. Busy busy bee.
Tap Back,
L
6:57 AM
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Monday, August 27, 2007
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Another wonderful weekend...
Current mood: touched
Category: Romance and Relationships
*sigh*
It's tough to be home after 48 hours of pure magic, but here I am.
I went back to Cochecton this weekend to spend another two days camping with Alan. We went tubing down the Delaware-- though he lives there he'd never been, and we will both talk about that day for many years to come. It was probably the happiest day I can ever remember. The romance of floating down the river together for six hours was unbelieveable... Kissing and holding hands through the rapids, spinning around and around in the current, pulling him by my feet as I glided through the water sans tube-- it felt like flying with that life jacket on and the large river stones disappearing rapidly under me. He watched like a hawk for my safety and grinned from ear to ear reveling in the fun I was having and the occasional flash of a nipple as my top fought the current. I could relive that day over and over and never be bored by my memories... The great news is that I won't have to, because I've found someone who will reinvent that day for me as long as we both shall live.
edit: I had to add that when we were about to get in the tubes Alan said, "Look babe... it's a baby catfish." He proceeded to cup his hand in front of it and the little fish (about 4" long) swam into his hand. He gently pulled it out of the water so I could 'pet' it and cautioned me about their stinging capabilities even at that age, kissed me, and then released the little guy back into the water. Later when I remarked on how amazing it was that the fish swam right into his hand he said with an empathy that resonated so deeply with me, "I don't think he was doing so well, sweetheart...." And this from a former rodeo cowboy who hunts, fishes, and all that... he has a deep respect for nature, and a love for all living things. I feel like the universe crafted him just for me, in anticipation of everything I would need a partner to be.
I miss him so much already... I can't wait for this weekend! He's coming to Branstock to help us and meet my friends and family. Yay!
Happy,
L
6:50 AM
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