WE NEED A 2007 CHAMPIONSHIP VENUE!!!!!!!
Category: Sports

The Toronto Roller Derby league is looking for a 10,000 Sq ft venue in Toronto to play our final game of the season between the Chicks Ahoy! and the Gore-Gore Rollergirls.

We're looking for space in Oct - early November. Whoever comes up with a fruitful lead, I will personally hand you 2 tix to the championship AND a seasons pass to for the 2008 season.

SWEET DEAL!

HELP US FIND A SPACE!!!!!

email me at miaculprit@yahoo.ca

xoxoxoox

-Mia

5:45 PM - 0 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

ROLLER SUICIDE @ THE MOD CLUB, SUNDAY NOVEMBER 18!!!
Category: Parties and Nightlife

COME OUT and support your local hot roller girls!

There will be suicide girls, roller girls and all round hot girls! COME OUT YOU DO NOT WANT TO MISS THIS!!!

I will be skating in the roller skating "demon-strations" ....

Tell all your friends... Tell them now!!!!

7:17 AM - 0 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

i've been silent too long!!!!
Current mood: chipper

hello lovers and friends;

I really don't blog enough, I know. So - what's going on in the world of Mia? Everything. Our league is rolling ahead, we're waiting for another planning meeting, looking like our season will start in 2007 as planned in the early spring. I'm super excited. I'm dying to start playing regularily.

I also LOVE LOVE LOVE Juicy Contusion #777 from the D-Funk Allstars. That girl makes my life. She's so amazing and passionate about this sport. This weekend she's driving to Toronto to celebrate my birthday (and hers is today!! MSG HER www.myspace.com/juicyblue777 ) and hers, and basically party the night away, then she's DRIVING back to Detroit, only to turn around and drive to Chicago the next day for the windy city girls championship game. HOLY FUCK. I love her.

I don't have much else to say, I'm bored, send me messages, ask me questions, tell me stories - I love getting emails.

XO ladies and gents!

-Mia Culprit

7:33 AM - 0 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

roller girl survey.....

What league do you belong to:
Toronto Roller Derby League

What is your derby name:
Mia Culprit

How did you pick your name:
Mea Culpa - it's latin - look it up fools :)

What is your number:
.22

How long have you been a derby girl:
Seven months

why did you become a derby girl:
Hmmm so hard to answer. As soon as I found out there was a team starting in Toronto I just HAD to be part of it. I knew it was something i needed to be involved in!!!

What is the worst roller derby injury you have had:
just a bruised hip bone which came with a wonderful scar :)

what are your captains/co-captains name:
Mia Culprit and Black Sunshine!

what is your teams name:
The Deadly Viper Assassination Squad AKA D-VAS

are you going to Rollercon:
No, not this year, but my boss has told me that if I quit smoking, He'll send me to rollercon next year! All expenses paid!!! :) So needless to say, I'm a non-smoker!!

how many bouts have you played in:
1 - against the hammer and it was more like a scrimmage than a bout....Feburary baby!!!!

what color are your wheels:
right now they're blue

make a sentance using the letters D-E-R-B-Y:
D-VAS Enjoy Really Bruising You (lol LAME)

have you ever skated on a banked track:
YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

did you like the show "Rollergirls":
oh yess I love those girls to bits. Those ladies in Texas know the true meaning of Derby. XOX sistas

do you have a roller derby tattoo:
no. I should though

did you skate before you joined roller derby:
noooo

have you ever been asked if roller deby involves a BALL:
LOL yeah and then i punched them in the face for being ignorant

Vitamin Water or Gatorade:
what? lol anything liquid

Has derby ever given you a black eye:
nope.

How many hobbies has derby replaced?
everything - derby=life.

do u smoke cigs?
nope! NON SMOKER (see roller con above)

Hosiery of choice?
Striped socks at practice, red fishnets in uniform.

What derby name do you wish you would have come up with?
I LOVE the name jennacide and wish I was around first to claim it *le sigh*

...add a question or two before you pass this on....

My questions:

What league do you want to play against:
hmmm - the austin girls :) Flat or banked. I just want to know I can do it lol ;)

What is your favourite "move" in derby:
shakin my ass in every jammers face ;)

How many other derby teams have you seen play:
Texas - All star teams of LADD VS TXRD
Detroit - twice
Hamilton - Once
Practice with the hottest flat track girls the TXRG :) and the delicious Windy City Ladies Jenny Rotten and Penny :)

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THIS IS HOW ROLLER DERBY WORKS *stolen from Juicy Contusion*

The basics

Currently listening : The Soul Sessions By Joss Stone Release date: 16 September, 2003

5:49 AM - 0 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

Rules to dating a roller girl....
Category: Sports

These are rules to live by guys if you want to date us rollergirls. This will avoid any false hope and lots of arguments/team breakups.

1 - MEN CANNOT COMPETE WITH DERBY! You will ALWAYS get sloppy seconds. Derby must have her first.

2 - SHE WILL NEVER HAVE "PLANS" WITH YOU. She has plans with derby only & will fit you in when convenient. Your "plans" will be dropped for anything derby.

3 - YOU ARE THERE TO WORK OUT HER FRUSTRATIONS. Derby leagues get in spats sometimes. When frustrated, derby girls require immediate sexual activity. Luckily for you, there is alot of frustration in roller derby...

4 - DO NOT START TALKING ABOUT A VACATION YOU WANT TO TAKE WITH HER. She will go into immediate panic mode thinking you will take her away from derby practice. A vacation is permissable only in cities with other rollerderbies. In such instances, you must entertain yourself as they skate, go hide in the corner of the bar with the other derby widows while the girls party, and sit up all night while she talks derby with the new friends she made.

-Don't try to be the "manager"; do not get involved with derby business, that is for the rollergirl.

-Don't ask her teammates for relationship advice.

-Do not complain when your (insert holiday here) date gets cancelled because a bout has been scheduled. Holidays are no longer yours. Even Valentines Day!

***-It's NOT mandatory that you are at every bout. ***

-Do not get jealous when your rollergirl talks to groupies. They are the one's buying the tickets, beer and merch, not you, so let them have their time. And remember...you get to go home with her!

-Babies don't make rollergirls quit derby

-No, the league does not want you to travel with them.

-Don't make the following introduction: Hi! I'm _____. My rollergirl is ______.

-Don't follow her around at bouts like a lost puppy, she is taking care of business, find your own crowd.

-Don't go to league practice. And it's normal to have practice more than once a week.

-Do not stand in front of your rollergirl while she is skating and stare at her like she is the greatest skater in the world. She is liable to take you out!

-Do not change your favorite team based on the type of rollergirl you date. Going from team to team shows you are not your own individual.

-If she calls while out on the road, don't complain about when she is coming home. You're lucky she is using the quarter to call you, instead of buying gas or food.

-Never say anything negative about your rollergirls league that you cannot say to her. It will only come back to bite you in the ass.

-If you're dating a rollergirl who wears a short skirt, she works it on the track -- not only you get to see Victoria's secret.

-Never cause a fight right before your rollergirl plays a bout. Relationship problems can be dealt with after the bout. ..

-If they have a bout out of town, don't drive just so you and your rollergirl can have "alone time" or because you want to "talk".

-You cannot drink on the rollergirl's tab! Buy your own!

-Keep the derby separate from your everyday life. That's your rollergirls passion, find your own.

8:43 PM - 0 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

COME OUT AND PARTY!!! MAY 23rd @ THE KATHEDRAL!
Category: Games

'nuff said ;)

-Mia

11:40 AM - 0 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

Derby Friends VS Those Friends
Category: Parties and Nightlife

I can't remember my life before derby  - honestly. I guess there are lots of "derby kind" of people out there who were just floating by aimlessly until we found that one thing that we can sink our teeth and our hearts in to and get paid back 110%.

Difference between THOSE OTHER friends and DERBY friends

THOSE OTHER FRIENDS: Bring over food to share.
DERBY FRIENDS: are the reason you have no food, but a lifetime
supply of jello shots crammed in the fridge & 16 bourbon bottles
with one shot a piece left.

THOSE OTHER FRIENDS: Call your parents Mr/Mrs
DERBY FRIENDS: Call your parents MamaLicious/Papa Roxy/Granny
Destruction

THOSE OTHER FRIENDS: bail you out of jail and tell you what you did
was wrong.
DERBY FRIENDS: Would sit next to you sayin "Damn...we gotta wait
until practice & the meeting is over to call someone. Hey, watch
this..."

THOSE OTHER FRIENDS: never seen you cry.
DERBY FRIENDS: don't know how to communicate without screaming &
tears...followed by calling bullshit & hipchecking someone out so
everyone loves each other again.

THOSE OTHER FRIENDS: Borrow your stuff for a few days then give it
back.
DERBY FRIENDS: won't touch your shit it stank so bad.

THOSE OTHER FRIENDS: know a few things about you.
DERBY FRIENDS: All over the country know every legend about you &
speak of you with love & sisterhood even though they have no idea
what you look like without a helmet on.

THOSE OTHER FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd
is doing.
DERBY FRIENDS: Kick your ass into the crowd & come back around for
more.

THOSE OTHER FRIENDS: Would politely knock on your front door.
DERBY FRIENDS: Walk right in and say "Bitch, you were sposed to be
at the rink an hour ago." Grab your gear, throw it in your car, push
your red faced boy/girlfriend out of the way & drag your lazy ass
out to practice.

THOSE OTHER FRIENDS: Are fairweathered.
DERBY FRIENDS: No matter how many times they piss you off, are por
vida.

THOSE OTHER FRIENDS: Will take your drink away when they think
you've had enough.
DERBY FRIENDS: Will indignantly stand up to that friend for you &
take the drink back & swallow it, then go, "oh shit, that was your
drink, here...let me get another round."

THOSE OTHER FRIENDS: will talk shit to the person who talks shit
about you.
DERBY FRIENDS: Will laugh their ass off & top their story

THOSE OTHER FRIENDS: Are rolling their eyes right now they're so
fucking sick of derby talk
DERBY FRIENDS: Are out rollin!!

9:09 PM - 0 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

You know you're a derby girl when....

you know you're a derby girl when....

1. your pants are suddenly a little snug in the butt and thighs.

2. you're very proud of your bruises and show them off to all of your friends workers while they stare at you and wonder if they should intervene -- the nastier the better.

3. the worst part of practice is taking off your skates.

4. people call you by your skate name as much as your real name.

5. you think your skate name is your real name. - You identify yourself as Luna CHICKen upon meeting professional contacts.

6. the thought of skating at top speeds and falling doesn't scare you anymore.

7. you find yourself drawn to hosiery departments.

8. www.sock-dreams.com is one of your favorite websites.

9. you are constantly thinking of places to go skate: clubs/parks/etc.

10. you hip check your friends to say hello, and they are suddenly scared of you.

11. you find yourself discussing how roller skates and guitars are equally hot accessories.

12. you find yourself worrying that you are not eating enough carbohydrates rather than less carbohydrates.

13. you know everyone's skate names on other teams but may never know their real names.

14. something is making your house stink, and you realize that your wrist guards escaped from you equipment bag.

15. you consider your skates to be your favorite pair of shoes.

16. when you're actually SAD that you don't have any bruises to show your friends.

17. when you have to restrain yourself from body-checking the ladies in the grocery store.

18. when you're driving down the road, looking over shoulder at the cars coming up instead of using the mirrors.

19. when you are driving and see a cop, you see them as a pivot.

20. when you body-check the vending machine repeatedly until it gives you your freak'n chips.

21. You quit your job because it doesn't coincide with your practice schedule

22. 8 hours of practice a week justifies this double bacon cheeseburger - or cake!

23. You spent your phone bill money on new wheels

24. You run into your teammates at the mall and try to introduce them to your friends, and don't know which name to use. -- Try being at lunch with your boss, seeing your teamate and and not even knowing their real name. "Sir, this is my friend Toxic Spill"

25. you forget you once pushed doors opened with your hands. show that door no mercy!!!

26. you want your name on the back of all of your clothes.


26. when you have helped break a girls leg and instead of filing charges she still hugs you every time she sees you.

27. you equate the smell of hot girls with a high school football team.

28. You spend too much time on MySpace talking about how you know you when you are a derby girl.

29. To quote Heidi Ho Its all fun and games till my ankle gets brokenthen its Derby


30. you walk around feeling 8'4" when you're only above 5' tall.

31. you feel like if you met someone in the street you could kick their ass badly.

32. you're done with practice and all you can smell are pads.

33. when you hear hotwheels say "dixie" n' she answers with "hotwheels"

34. when you kick your friend's ass then ask them out for a beer after you kill them.

35. on the track, the words "i'm sorry" become non-existent in your vocabulary.

36. you want to yell and scream in excitement when you plant someone to the floor.

37. to prepare for the game, you practice your checking by running into the door or wall of your house.

38. when you decide that beating yourself up on roller skates was the best thing you've ever done.

39. even if you don't have any tattoos and never wanted any before you do now.

40. when you take your socks out of your skate bag and they stand straight up.

41. You begin to see every line (supermarket, dmv) as a potential drill

42. You're mom has replaced your prom picture on her desk with a picture of you on skates

43. When your friends introduce you to someone new the first thing they tell them is that you are a rollergirl, then your derby name, then you're real name

44. You consider legally changing your name to your derby name

45. You're psyched that one of the new girls kicked your ass

46. When you leave practice and get into your car you are still jamming!!!

47. Your boyfriend thinks your nasty mouthguard soaking in listerine is hot

48. You're in a crowd of people and start blocking them out of your way to get through.

49. You ask someone to block you REALLY HARD so you'll have a good bruise to show later.

50. You refer to yourself by your derby name on your voicemail.

51. Most of your MySpace top 8 are teammates.

52. Your cell phone is filled with names like Roll-X, Goody Two-Skates and Black-Eye Susan.

53. Your students think you're WAY cooler than they are because you kick people's asses in fishnets.

8:59 PM - 1 Comments - 1 Kudos - Add Comment