Men: Medium to Rare or Well Done (An inspired Blog - Thanks B and Belladonna)
Current mood: blank
Category: Games

Lazy Mish here who is firing blanks...

So what’s my next blog about then when I  get round to writing it????

Massive clue in the title... 

Be and Donna - no telling but drop a few hints...

Mishxxx

Currently listening : Steak By Original Soundtrack Release date: 13 January, 2008

1:09 PM - 25 Comments - 16 Kudos - Add Comment

The Non Neighbourly Persuasion
Current mood: bitchy
Category: Life

Inspired by Hils who was on the verge of strangling her neighbour but didn’t (so proud of her),  I also have an issue with a Nice but, Nosey, Interferring, Social Psychopath of a Neighbour who annoys the hell out of me, though I smile through gritted teeth thinking the worst imaginable, since he is 79 years old and it has been drummed into my upbringing "respect your elders" even if they are juvenile delinquents just like Shep.

My thoughts are becoming really dark and being a Taurean if my temper gets the better of me... Let’s not go there...   So I want to move over to the light side of life and smile at him but think nicer thoughts, as I listen to his onslaught of abuse about the other neighbours...  Two Faced Shit (oops!!)

All suggestions welcomed...


Mishxx

5:48 AM - 22 Comments - 15 Kudos - Add Comment

A Policeman’s Ball - (continued)
Current mood: breezy
Category: Religion and Philosophy

Scene 3

PC Plonker - my saviour, had arrived.  He was a true vision of a hero if ever there wasn't one.  I felt reassured that my Council Tax contribution was being used as suspected: ensuring our services are less than top notch. 

"Sorry I am so late; I couldn't find your house.  It's in the middle of no where. You're lucky I turned up."

Lucky?

"So what's the problem?" he eventually asks

"My window is smashed and I cannot get into my flat"

"Oh. Anything else damaged? Is there any other windows?" He remarks

"Yes round the back."

All of us now follow the hero of the moment, round the back of my house.

"Nothing broken here, but your lighting system is pathetic. If I trip now I tell you and injure myself, I-I-I could sue you. I could.  You need to get it sorted and… blah, blah, blah"

Get on with it....  Focus Mish, focus...

"I want to get into my house, my pets… what can I do about it?"  I remind him of my brewing anxieties.  Right now, I don't give a shit about a broken this or that, get me into my fucking house!!!  Contain yourself Mish….  It will be ok… (I think)

"Can't we just bust the door down?" suggests one of the kids "Like in the Bill, using that thingy?"

"A Battering Ramp!" respond all the men in chorus. 

Mmmh I am not sure about this, in fact if a Battering Ramp is what I think it is…then no.. oh I don't know. I just want to get into my house.  Anyway, what will the neighbours bloody think? Mr Nosey Interfering Sour Old Gossip, who moans when the door is slapped at the best of times, will surely have a heart attack now…

"Mmmh" There is a glimmer of hope as PC Plonker feels the idea is a good one.  "Err hold on, let me check with my Sarge."

I watch as he connects to some mystery godlike person on the other end of his Walkie Talkie.

"Well… erm, my Sarge says not possible, too much damage will be caused and it will make such a mess you know.  I mean it's my choice obviously, but I think I would have to agree with my Sarge.  I can do it though, but the mess erm.. well is there somewhere we could go to talk about this?"

"Yes, my house" says Jo

Aargh!!!

We all gather in Jo's flat.  The kids are now relaxing watching The Bill ironically, I have zoned out, my boyfriend is thinking what the F**K, whilst Jo's boyfriend is trying to workout the best way of getting into my house. 

Scene 4

Questions now follow:

"At what time did you hear about the incident Miss Mahoney or shall I call you Michelle?"  I look at Jo to verify the time she called…

"No! No! No!" he shouts "Don't look at her, No not allowed.  Is there another room I could use?  This is not following police procedure, it's not!"

"No" says Jo

"Well... I suppose this will have to do, since your flat is so small. But I want you to know, you are both suspects.  You both could have planned this."

What!?!

"Right, let's start again, at what time did you hear about the incident?"

"Jo phoned me on my mobile at around 6.00ish."

"Where were you at the time?"

"Driving up North."

"Are you saying that you were using your mobile phone whilst driving? This is an offence you know? Are you confessing something here Michelle?"

Oh fuck off!!! Calm..

"No, I pulled over" 

"That's not true to life!" his attention is now captured by The Bill. "So many people try to copy the police, but it's not real you know?"  The kids look at him, bewildered by his suggestion.

Well at least they do a better job.... What is this Crap?  Is it a joke?  Is he really a policeman? Keep it in Mish, you will be okay, just remember not to act like a Taurean.

 "I want to get into my house" I proceeded to remind him again of why he was called in the first place.  He now stares at both of the suspects and says whimsically "Are you both happy to appear in court?"

11:38 AM - 8 Comments - 8 Kudos - Add Comment

Tagged Marked 2 --- Thanks Becky...
Current mood: dorky
Category: News and Politics

A Policeman's Ball

Since I have been tagged again (Thanks Becky), I thought I would write ten things (in sitcom/drama fashion) about the most surreal time of my life!!!  It is truly a Tale of the Unexpected… 

Scene 1

It was the day after Boxing Day (2006) as I travelled up North with my boyfriend and his kids when I got the earth shattering call on my mobile:  

"I can't open your door and Mish did you know your front window was smashed?"

My pet sitter Jo, who I had been appointed to take care of my house and my beloved pets, broke the news that everyone dreads:

"Do you think you have been broken into Mish? I don't mean to worry you, but I think there is someone inside as I can't get the door open."

Having completed only 100 miles of the journey up North, it was now 6.30 in the evening.  The prospect of the excruciating long drive back home pierced through every nerve in my body.

Scene 2

Sure enough my window was smashed. I tried my key in the door and it wouldn't turn.  Whoever was in the house had now left or so I thought. 

All of us (Jo and her boyfriend, my boyfriend and his two kids) stood waiting for the police to arrive, watching the property for movement.  I wore the worry well under the circumstances, though my body weighed a ton, just barely able to withstand the stress that was to come.  Frantic thoughts circulated my head: had the glass fallen on my bunnies head?  Are my bunnies headless?  What about the cats?  How would I get the bits of glass out of their fur?  Surely I would need a Hoover?

In waltzes lone Policeman - PC Plonker - not technically his name, only 2 hours after Jo had made the call.

Currently listening : The Secret Policeman's Ball - The Music By Pete Townshend

11:04 PM - 10 Comments - 7 Kudos - Add Comment

Well I have been tagged – thanks Rhoda….
Current mood: artistic
Category: Parties and Nightlife

Here goes my Top Ten revised... (better late than never) 

1.      I once thought about joining the circus.  My expertise would have been the walking the tight rope, but a mishap when I was 9 years old put play to that…  If only I had realised then, that using an actual rope was a better way to master my technique rather than a rickety old fence, perhaps my genital area would not have endure the painful shock that it did when I landed full throttle on it. (ouch!!!)

2.      I have been known to get wild on the dance floor.  However, what is really worrying, I cannot hide behind alcohol as I am completely sober when I decide to bust some moves.  Whether it be on all fours doing my wacky tribal dog dance to "who let the dogs out" or getting "jiggy with it" with a professional belly dancer at a Greek restaurant, you could say that once I start I lose all track of reality and enter another realm.  (burn baby burn…)

3.      I once went through a Rolf Harris moment.  In fact I wanted to be Rolfie in Animal Hospital.  So to get me started I thought it would be a good idea to have 12 house bunnies and 3 cats.  Unfortunately, I have now seen the light. But I still miss all of my honey buns who have now passed away and gone on to bunny heaven. L

4.      Have you ever wondered what it is like to get emotionally involved with an Alcoholic?  Having spent 6 years in bloody hell that is one question I won't be asking again. (hic..)

5.      I can be very shy (don't look at me!!!) around men.  In fact, it took me a long time to understand the concept of boyfriend and girlfriend.  In fact, my first real major relationship of the 'boyfriend and girlfriend kind' happened in my very late 20s.   By contrast, I can turn into a right vixen when "Mishka the Goth" is set free, leaving men wondering where did the shy one go?

Having got to point 5 and looking at my list, I think I had better stop right now, before things go too far…  

Currently listening : Who Let the Dogs Out By Baha Men Release date: 25 July, 2000

10:06 AM - 14 Comments - 10 Kudos - Add Comment

I’m a different person... turned my world around...
Current mood: content
Category: Life

The first 6 months of this year have been very difficult for me; filled with rejection, problems, problems, problems and lots of sadness. I felt trapped and wondered if I would ever survive. But then I survived and saw the light...

I am now celebrating the reinvention of Mish; I am a different person and I have turned my world around. For all the crap that I have been through, it has made me whole and whilst I still continue to change the many patterns in my life, it makes me happy to tell the world that I have found my way.

Big hugs to you all

Mishxx

Currently listening : Sound Advice By Shapeshifters Release date: 03 April, 2006

1:53 PM - 0 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

A Rabbit’s Tale
Current mood: ecstatic
Category: Life

Today, I thought my life might end in shock.....

This morning I had a rude awakening; there were loud screams coming from the bunny's bedroom.  I rushed to the scene only to discover my dearly beloved Mr Beans lying on the floor, panting and breathless...

Having already sent off I few of my honeybuns to bunny heaven and knowing that when a bunny screams it usually means death is about to follow, I had resigned myself to the fact that Mr Beans was no longer full of beans; he was going to die.  Nonetheless, I still tried my best to save him; I gave him pineapple juice and medication, though I didn't know what was wrong and trying to get him to the vets when it was clearly an emergency, seemed pointless; a decision had to be made to help him. 

After a few minutes, he seemed to get worse.  I left him for a moment as the anxiety of watching him suffer was all too much.

Crying uncontrollably, I returned to see Beano's body just lying there.  It was time to deal with his remains.  Just as I knelt down to pick him up, suddenly his head popped up.  I was just so speechless and my heart was pounding wildly.  How could this be?  I was wondering if I had actually woken up yet.  Then Mr Beans sat up and looked at me.  I looked at him, whilst still wondering what was going to happen now.  I gave him a kiss and a great big cuddle.  All the love and cuddles proved a little too much for Mr Beans as he then decided to go for a bunny hop.

Beano was back!!!!  He was filled with the greatest and most wonderful beans that life could ever offer.

Mr Beans with his lady...

"Get lost Mom, stop fussing..."

"This is the life..."

Currently listening : Bright Eyes By Art Garfunkel Release date: 08 March, 2004

1:52 AM - 2 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

Negative Thinking
Category: Life

Self Esteem - Negative Thinking
(Mizzymo - Self Help Series)

When we talk of Self Esteem, this is often associated with a negative characteristic, when in fact, simply put; it is your current state of being, whether good or bad.

With Self Esteem you can experience highs and lows, but it is the lows that are mainly focused on, especially when we are feeling down.  Why is that?  Why do we find it difficult to give ourselves a good old pat on the back every now and then, for all the good that we have done?  Why do we find it so difficult to just accept a fault as purely that and move on?

The answers to these questions are difficult.  It often depends on the individual's personality and background, but one thing is certain, in most cases, negative thinking is learnt behaviour.  When we learn to be negative, our mind quickly adapts to that state of being and so begins a vicious cycle.  When you obliterate your mind with a barrage of negative thoughts, then equally, the good that you have done cannot be recalled, as it has sunk to the bottomless pit within you. 

Rest assured there is an antidote, which really is quite simple, but not as easy to implement as one might think.  It requires retraining your mind to react to your thoughts quite decisively.  For every negative thought that enters your mind, you need to match this with a positive thought.  This will take time to master.  However, it is about achieving balance, so that no one particular aspect, albeit negative or positive, dominates the mind.   

To live the life of a negative thinker, leaves the door closed to true happiness and balance in life.  You may find yourself being excluded from activities with family or friends, or at its worst, you might become disillusioned with life.  If you feel you are a negative thinker, maybe it is time to start to get those positive thoughts into action and thank yourself for all the good you have done with your life.

Peace, Love and Happiness to you all...

Mishxxxx

Currently listening : A Hundred Thousand Angels By Bliss (UK) Release date: 05 April, 2004

1:03 PM - 0 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

My Celebrity Look-alikes

http://www.myheritage.com

10:59 AM - 0 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

Guess what emotion I am???
Current mood: drained
Category: Quiz/Survey

Who am I?..

It is me, the common denominator now; the successor to hate.  I am felt through the oceans, felt through the air.  Without me, life would be an endless volcanic eruption; the lava never subsiding.  She opened the doors to an unwelcome guest and shut the door on me.  Now what's left is destruction.   A woman whose heart is warm, affectionate and loving; destroyed.  A moment of pure corruption. 

Do you know who I am?  Have you not guessed?

2:08 PM - 0 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment