Celebrity and Pseudo-Celebrity Should Not Mix
Current mood: Wonky
Category: Wonky Blogging

Oh blogosphere is there a sign?

Do we look to the almighty MySpace friends list to figure out how we rate?

Is Technorati a better measuring device?

Alexa, perhaps?

If, within your local media market, you are called upon for the sound bite needed, are you then approaching name recognition?

Perhaps.

Still, if my case were an example I'd still be further down the list of known pundits in my media market.

There are those who offer a more timely product with more page views and traffic density, but who among them can offer a brand name?

Again, I am humble to my own detriment. In fact, I think I overstate my position in my marketplace.

There are writers and bloggers who deliver on a consistent basis, though often with the appearance and quality of having a gun pointed at their head.

Marketing was never my strong suit.

Perhaps those more knowledgeable could advise on what steps could be taken toward building a writing career once a fair amount of name recognition is achieved.

And yes, grammar cops, I am fully aware of my weaknesses in that area too.

Currently listening : Morningwood By Morningwood Release date: 10 January, 2006

11:10 PM - 89 Comments - 2 Kudos - Add Comment

Penis. Vagina. Penis. Vagina. Penis. Vagina.
Current mood: Penis. Vagina.
Category: Penis. Vagina. News and Politics

I've always wondered about this:

If I support pro-lifers, does that mean my political free speech is protected if I fly over large cities with a banner featuring a huge photo of a vagina?

This is one of many important questions that keep me up at night.

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Currently watching : The Larry Sanders Show - The Entire First Season Release date: 30 September, 2003

1:35 AM - 89 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

Bully For You, Chilly For Me or Hawaii's Criminal Politician Gets Stupid
Current mood: Love All The People
Category: Love All The People News and Politics

I thought when I left grade school, and when I'd become an adult, I'd left the world of the school yard bully.

How wrong was I?

This wrong:

Rep. Harbin's lawsuit threat forces artist to shut Web site

And this wrong:

Blogger shuts down Web site that mocked legislator

Give a bully a political seat and a paycheck, and suddenly they think they're beyond reproach.

Above the law, even.

Folks, I'm a simple guy who just wants to watch Michelle Wie.

And get back my honor.

It's always about the getting back my honor.

Currently reading : Transmetropolitan Vol. 2: Lust for Life By Warren Ellis Release date: 01 February, 1999

1:42 PM - 89 Comments - 4 Kudos - Add Comment

Mr. Stink Answers MySpace Reader Mail
Current mood: Scratchy
Category: Scratchy Pets and Animals

More like comments though, really.

I've been advised by my local memeist that I should not encourage the ceiling cat meme.

She longs for the simpler days of bonsai kittens.

And ASCII pr0n, I'd imagine.

Boy, do I imagine...

Alas, I know the lass be might right.

For you see, I know when my shit stinks, unlike certain politicians.

Hence, in a final act of memery I offer this link to Hitler Cats.

I'd have preferred "Hitler Kitties," or "The Hiss Hiss" but I wasn't the one who started this nonsense.

Currently listening : Sings America By David Hasselhoff Release date: 17 November, 2005

4:21 PM - 89 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

The Beautiful People Love Me
Current mood: Jamba! Jamba! Jamba!
Category: Jamba! Jamba! Jamba! Romance and Relationships

Hey hey.

Long time no stink.

Indeed.

The beautiful people ask me why.

They also ask me, "What is it with you and the fabulous babes?"

I'm picky.

That's what I used to tell people anyway.

Thing is, I've gotten older, and I now know that I've honestly never met a woman who was face that could stop a clock ugly.

Scout's honor.

And I dropped out of the scouts after the first meeting.

Too businesslike you see.

But I digress.

Where's talk stink, is what they've asked lately.

Here's where.

That still doesn't explain why the fabulous babes keep in touch with me.

Although, I know they stop keeping in touch with me when I say things like...

What do you see in that meatbag boyfriend of your's anyway?

And...

It sounds like he doesn't appreciate you.

Or...

Sure, I'll send my screenplay right over.

Currently watching : Romeo & Juliet Release date: 23 May, 2000

1:46 PM - 89 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

IE Be Damned!
Current mood: IE'd
Category: IE'd Web, HTML, Tech

People read Talk Stink for many reasons.

Some don't read it.

They're usually the ones who come looking for Jessica Alba's butt shots.

And it is on Talk Stink.

Unfortunately, lots of them use Windows Internet Explorer rather than a modern standards based brower.

Say Firefox, for instance.

Or Mozilla.

Or Safari.

Hell, even Opera would be better.

But don't quote me on that.

IE and Outlook Express are the bane of the internet.

Web designers hate IE plenty. They Talk Stink about it all the time.

That being said, if you insist on using IE, please inform me of any problems you have viewing Talk Stink.

That is all.

11:55 PM - 89 Comments - 2 Kudos - Add Comment

Eight Not Fat Eight
Current mood: photographed
Category: photographed MySpace

How to decide who makes the cut.

It's not a question of who doesn't talk stink about you.

Nor is it about who emails you the most nude pictures.

But it could be.

Now that you can choose your "top 8" you can offend someone the way I tend to do everyday.

And by offend, I mean do no harm.

I decided it would be best to fill my "top 8" with people whom I chat with on a semi-regular basis.

They won't hang out with me, but we chat.

Seriously, they say to me, "We'd rather you not come along with us."

So while there are hotties hot enough to be seen on Hawaii Club Scene on my list, they won't be on my "top 8."

Sorry gals, even though you're hot, intelligent and massively talented... wait a minute. What am I thinking?

So how did you decide your "top 8?"

Currently listening : Mama's Big Ones: The Best of Mama Cass By Mama Cass Release date: 25 October, 1990

2:26 AM - 89 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

Hawaii Club Scene
Current mood: stink
Category: stink Parties and Nightlife

People give me a hard time whenever I'm polite.

If I'm being polite it probably means I'll never see you again and we might as well be two ships passing in the night.

If I talk stink about you, or generally dilute anything positive about you then we're fast becoming friends.

Take my word for it.

I don't have rodent mouth for nothing.

In fact the kinder I treat people the less likely I am to see them -- they'd rather spend less time with me!

So apparently it's not just insecure young women with low self-esteem who love abusive relationships.

It goes for everyone.

We'll that's changing, I can't have people making me expend my precious energy being nice so they don't keep in touch with me.

So here's the nice thing I'm doing for everyone so I can get on with all the talk stink and whatnot.

Visit Hawaii Club Scene and take a look at hot men and women at all kinds of events in Hawaii and click on a ad link while you're at it.

If you don't I'll keep being my nice self.

And nobody wants that.

Currently watching : Ice Princess (Widescreen Edition) Release date: 19 July, 2005

12:27 AM - 89 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

Mr. Stink answers MySpace Mail
Current mood: Shaved

At Talk Stink we enjoy answering reader mail. I'd like to give that a try here.

The eRic writes:

hey talk stink... is it just me or is shari shima (KHNL TV news anchor) getting fat.



is she diabetic? sick? what could be the reason for such tight clothes on channel 4 news?

Dear Eric,

Don't think I haven't noticed it myself.

I've watched Shari Shima balloon on television through the years.

I see it all over actually.

It's called aging.

It's what happens when you go to your tenth year high school reunion and everyone looks the same, but fatter.

Time is a bitch.

Time was I looked so slim that women envied my figure.

People thought I was on crack.

Nowadays, people think I'm a tubby bastard on crack.

But, I digress.

So far as I know Shima is not diabetic, or ill.

I will say this: Melisa Uchida has battled adult on-set acne...



And she's still hott.

According to that gossip site Talk Stink, anyway.

Currently listening : Back in Black/You Shook Me All Night Long By AC Release date: 27 May, 1993

1:20 PM - 89 Comments - 2 Kudos - Add Comment

This Is Where I Get Off
Current mood: caffeinated

"Where do you get off talking stink about people you don't even know?"

I don't, really.

Really.

People want it though.

As long as they do I'll gladly supply it to them for a visit to my sponsors.

I want people to be happy.

Problem is there isn't much feedback.

If there's nothing to talk about I get bored.

Conversation is what relationships are all about.

Sure, my commode mouth isn't going to make us friends sooner, but it's not for lack of interest on my part.

I love everyone who reads Talk Stink for whatever reason.

Without you there is no conversation.

Currently listening : Without Me By Eminem Release date: 20 May, 2002

8:49 PM - 89 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

Everyone get naked! Don't be ashamed.
Current mood: caffeinated

It's hard work writing Talk Stink.

Take the latest post that found its way into our InBox.

Pictures of Michelle Rodriguez getting wet and topless at a New Year's party.

Where are all these people getting naked and having sex all the time?

I sure as hell don't see them.

Unless they're online.

Or in ASCII pr0n.

        _____    
        /  _/....  
        | / oo
        ..(   _..
         ..  O/
         /   ..
         ||  ||
         ||  ||      "Hmmmmmmmm..."
         ||  || _____ /
         | .. ||(___  )
        // / ..|_)o (  )
        .... ///|).._(    )
         ||   |.. )(    )
         ||   ) ../(____)_     ___
         ||   |..___/     `---' `.`.
         ||   | :   _       .'   ))
         ||   | `..' `~~~-.'   .'__ _
         ....  /           '.______  ( (
         ((___ooO                `._.._.. jro

Currently listening : Girls, Girls, Girls By Mötley Crüe Release date: 08 April, 2003

10:52 AM - 89 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

Catherine Toth Gets Freaky
Current mood: caffeinated

The things I do for my readers.

I'm in pain right now, so I'll keep this short.

Read Talk Stink and learn.

Must. Stop. Using. Hands.

Currently listening : Freak of Nature By Anastacia Release date: 18 June, 2002

8:53 AM - 89 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

Does Joe Moore Hate You?
Current mood: caffeinated

Everyone loves a winner... mostly. If you're a supporter of UH Football Coach June Jones you'll want this fine garment adorning your back. It's the perfect shirt for hardcore University of Hawaii Warrior Football fans or anyone who doesn't work with Hawaii's top news anchor — or maybe does!

If you weren't satisfied with Moonglow or last night's KHON news these 100% cotton Hanes t-shirts are sure to please. They're available for all sizes in your choice of white or green and emblazoned with the words "Joe Moore hates me" on the front with a smaller "talkstink.com" on the back.

5:17 PM - 89 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

Fight For Your Right to Blog
Current mood: patriotic

Know your rights!

Currently watching : All the President's Men Release date: 28 October, 1997

6:51 PM - 89 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

I Purchase Them Wholesale from Brazilian Street Urchins
Current mood: lost in space

Where do I get my ideas?

That's what she asked me after I told her I was a writer.

Current events is always an easy answer.

Just look at Talk Stink.

I could've said I read a lot, but that could be a total bore if she doesn't read.

A lot of people don't read much.

Some can barely handle email, let alone a cheezy gossip blog.

That's where the idea to run comics came from.

Too bad she didn't ask about that.

Currently reading : The Stars : A New Way to See Them By H. A. Rey Release date: 18 November, 1976

11:16 PM - 89 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment