The Contender
Category: Writing and Poetry

Which way will the wind blow next?
I have already been blown in so many directions
Assessing my own mistakes
Has become my motivation,
Separated only from intuition in the moment
Seeing the sights through any combination.

Punch drunk within the purity
Knowing I am just another contender
Just one, among the group
Fighting to be a face behind the prize

I have had enough
Of trying to make "A Name" for myself
What can possibly be worth more than my pride?

I have had the epiphany
The symphony in my head
The surgery of an analytical psyche
Outsourced like an orange clockwork of greed
The 5th that I cannot listen to anymore

I've glanced wide eyed into the eye of corruption
Speak not of its destruction
Just another attempt at self preservation
Tasting the karma of narcissism

A slave to the grind
Burning away another calorie,
To fit the mold; Holding no arms
Yet a gladiator with the heart of Rome

It's unfortunate the best stories ever told
Hold fast to the matters of Head Vs. Heart
How fast you move; how quick you get back up
And how such sweet science can be rendered into art

02:50 AM - 5 Comments - 18 Kudos - Add Comment

Butterfly
Current mood: amorous
Category: Writing and Poetry

I have sailed red wine seas
       Watching finger touched clouds break
   Charcoal visions always leave my hands dirty
The eye of the storm cuts away the habits from my heart
       
Look into every empty chamber of my being
          Hollow out a space for your own
I don't deserve to be mandatory
      But when you hide, can I come along?

  You don't always have to rhyme
     Wouldn't it be easier if we could repeat the first line?
 My mind is not a well capable of running dry
             Keep drinking, and everything will be fine

The intimate groove has become confused
      With the shortest distance absolved
Maybe tonight temptation wins
      So I can finally begin to breathe you in again

I close my eyes and see your skin
         Lay its softness upon my opposite
  Every curve fit to my soul  as you take hold
           
Spread yourself thin
              I will slide further in

Our body's keep us too far apart
        Let me get deeper into you
                Past the prison sent to us from heaven
                   On wings of envious angels
       Let me fly with you  through the shade
                   Until we feel the warmth of sunrise

I can no longer rest on the seventh day
   It has changed into a butterfly
         Fluttering its wings in the wind
     And sending my hair to stand on end
Every word uttered is followed by a gasp
             As I wish upon my rising Starr

The days are now numbered
   I have lost count; thrown into slumber
          To pass the time while I am half
Motion will never give up in the end
   I'll try my best for you to be home by then

Currently listening : Dreaming Neon Black By Nevermore Release date: 1999-01-26

07:00 AM - 16 Comments - 34 Kudos - Add Comment

Bridge
Current mood: aroused
Category: Writing and Poetry

Stand with me atop of this bridge
        Cut yourself with this knife
             Take my right hand
And allow our life to spill into this river
          We can live forever together in all the seas

Pain, as always is only a prelude

I've been scraping through my head for years
          consumed within the surreal
      I can never tell when they are real
          I can only tread further towards respite

Lost in a world of ghosts
    Comfortable in the discomfort
I came upon the poisonous snake
    dying from the venom
         left begging it for the antidote
 Only such fangs could pierce my skin

Violence is in my blood
      bred from birth to see it spill
nobody is innocent, one species
         killing all species in secrecy

Consciousness is my curse
       overanalyzing the flutter that lives inside
           acknowledgment was my mistake
                 feeding into that shadow on the wall

I can never hide from the darkness
     Only search for the cure that can kill the demon
  Seeking tranquility in this savage garden of Eden
                           
Love; this is the final curse
   An instant of purity
      is worth more than a lifetime of lies

Murder has always been pure; and I was naturally born
       pit me against the finest
                I will survive if I am the fittest
 
Follow me in the great escape
         This prison has become tiresome
   I will die trying to find your isolated cell
          To watch you slit the throat of your guard
                   with the blade of our memories

Freedom is much like hell,
           fashioned from a frame of mind
Cross this bridge with me
         So we can live forever together in all the seas


 

01:44 AM - 11 Comments - 22 Kudos - Add Comment

Mantis
Category: Writing and Poetry

Nikki, I already miss you !!!!


There is little room for weakness
      In another corridor
            the mantis prays for solace
    I must say goodbye inside
         for I must look strong;
                 (at least on the  outside)
   
I keep the setting to "hall"
       For the echoes remind me of your voice
    Filling my vicious void
            "this my love, is how it should be"
                  The surround reminds me
     Of the sounds we make when we disagree

I listen the peace
       Reverberating from the white
               And see nothing save your skin
 
Filing tooth to fang
         Just to taste the source
                    From the emptiness of this room
       I close my eyes;  And like the mantis
            I see the future as I have before

Discipline is a difficult ally
        Found in doses of death
     As we slice away complacency
             Within the dependence
        
No songs from the south can soothe my soul
        If there is no drum from your heart
                 To keep the rhythm
              
Prepare for glory,
        The glory of the simplest things
              Eluding us in the moment
       Forming promises from forethought
              As we continue walking down
                     The darkest alleys of our souls

This music has soothed a savage
       And the silence is merely a promise;
            A pause from the premise
      Before the inevitable conclusion of comfort

I no longer need to live my days inside
        I have nothing more to hide

07:06 PM - 19 Comments - 26 Kudos - Add Comment

Struggling to Breathe
Current mood: satisfied
Category: Writing and Poetry

Creature of habit
     Drawn to the familiar breeze
         From a perfect free hand circle
    Stretching; bending it.
             Into the comfort and safety
        That is found within its redundancy

The comfort of home becomes
       A misnomer
            As fear has been a friend
  From as far back as I can remember
           
Uncertainty has been known
              To be the only thing certain

Intervention into the inevitable is futile
      Draw forth the view that suits you
              And try harder to bend
       What has already been determined
               See again, what we’ve already said
                            Or it would have never been said

The self fulfilling prophesy,
             The deconstruction of me,
      The crack in the mirror of obscurity.
                  Far from what it seems,
          Shall lay to rest, elegant images
     And let me fall further into such delusions

It takes but one memory
      To be free from the flight of fury.
                Sip it in decadently
  And the pyre will burn from blurred purity
  
Or be free from history
            As it can show us how to see

Fear defines the source of our insecurities
           At our essence
       We become the sum of the subconscious
   
If we could only see in the mirror
           Free from the wrinkles of experience 
     As if it were a linear surface
               reflecting back the truth
            Then time itself would be significant
     And we would have our hearts on our sleeves
             instead of struggling to breathe 

11:24 PM - 21 Comments - 46 Kudos - Add Comment

Structrual Model of the Mind
Category: Writing and Poetry

Tacitly breathe the whisper
      Ushered in upon the breath
              Of experience
      Touch me once more amidst
           An existential myth; like Sartre’s
      
I have defined myself
     From the image of myself
    Burdened by the reflection of ones self
        Amidst these illusions I have once seen
               
                       I am I
 
The iceberg within us
         Drowning in the symbolism
       That has spread too deep beneath our skin
              Proscribing yet another taboo

The ego super cedes
        Let me be within this fortress
      It is only in this seclusion
           That I can be a moral man

I can be just another archetype
      Shown within the collective mind
     Through art tattooed upon these pages
  
I can be the shadow
         Creeping up inside of you
    Mocking in the shadows of every waxing moon

I can be the jester
      As laughter has been known to cure
                Even the most lost of souls

Or I could be the wise man
     And say, "devour"
          For a virus can consume
      Even the most gracious of hosts

I am just another voice
       From the collective conscious
               Writing with blood upon these walls
        As every brick gets painted black
               In the futility of one single existence

It is the visions of unison
        Hidden within all the fleeting images.
             When your heart races faster
                   Chasing a little death
                Just to become more experienced 

Greeted by the end with dignity.
       The omega has consumed me from conception,
                 I am insignificant.
        A grain of sand upon the beach
               That ebbs away
         From the gravity of lifeless satellites.

 Without you I am just a mere figment of myself
         And death continues to bloom within my mind

03:15 AM - 16 Comments - 30 Kudos - Add Comment

A Conversation with Kami
Category: Writing and Poetry

Compelled, I begin to breathe heavy
        From the sight of the silent character.
            Rising in waves from within,
        Every hair begins to stand on end.
     The text redefines the meaning of time         

The spirit that informs the inanimate
         Is placed within me
              And I begin to fall into place.
           I am nothing within this substance

The infirmity of myself
     Is no longer a burden
   In unison; cells transcend
          The body of being

I wander into worship of the wind,
    And it carries me in the right direction.

I would rather pour myself upon the sword
             In the name of honor
         Then live another day blind
                From the impurity of malice
     Harvesting sorrow from seeds of insignificance

My vision becomes animistic
        As souls dance out of the shadows
             Into a unified grid of existence
       Volume blends us all into obscurity
              Amidst its infinite density
                 
Read between the lines
     From the ministries of divinity
              Seek your true name
   In the words that mediocrity could never read

The concept of consciousness
         Consumes my every thought
      Until the omega can steal me
            Back into the beginning 

With every passing moment
        She whispers if you still yourself.
                  
Just sit there long enough
      And watch the mountains move
   Stop, and listen to each tree scream
        Of what beauty in simplicity really means

01:04 PM - 19 Comments - 44 Kudos - Add Comment

Maya (The Endless Obsession)
Category: Writing and Poetry

Let the words spill forward
      On the burning ashes of yesterday
    I learned how to be selfish today
 A stake in the heart of even the most selfless

Confusing myself a thousand times
     Within the mercy of the profound.
           Confounded in this silence
                 During the lovely laugh of my life
        Asleep mid sentence and falling to ground

Happiness has its place
       In the realization of the process
    Feed me a piece of you
         And I shall devour another appetizer
            In the passing hours of my purity

Spoiled ambition has formed a black heart
       Bleeding unkempt promises
          In moments of loneliness
     Solitude to me has been a hard won ally

Tragic days seem too peaceful to most
      Slip into something more comfortable
           And let your illusions consume you
     Use them and turn the pages with your mind

The innocence of individuals
       Intent on the indecency of society.
   Shape yourself new indiscretions
           That fit into your scheme of things
    
Goddamn television,
      Goddamn the radio,
            Goddamn the words I've read
                   Through these bloodshot eyes

How long do I regress back
         On the tracks I have left behind
      This is a new day; I never cared before
               It was but a vicious circle

On this day truth becomes my enemy
           It doesn't sound right to most ears
       As you fear that the only thing that defines you
            Is the only thing you have left to lose

I have seen the madness
       I have even seen some die trying
   Redeemed only in the face of wrath
        As they become too wrapped up in every step
                    Regardless of the decay

I would like to just once tell a story
     Without the burden that is buried
             In the depths of my heart
  For it is that burden that all good men posses

Currently listening : Alaska By Between the Buried and Me Release date: 06 September, 2005

08:30 PM - 22 Comments - 42 Kudos - Add Comment

Denial
Category: Writing and Poetry

Rip into the crevices
   Of an existential existence
      Through spaces between
 What we could never conceive to see

And just feel.
     Through the product of purity
           Perceived from the prototype
       Of denial; a persistent trial
    After so much misappropriated power

Design a destination
        That resides in your mind
                Try and find a path
          Guiding you through the pain
                That inevitably resides
    
Insane from the mundane
        As mud enters your veins
      Killing you considerately in a habit
          That straps you beneath its strings
                 Of a belt of fallibility
                  
All along behind the scenes
     The obscene becomes pristine
         Attempting to control the end
   That in one-way or another justifies the means

Pulled like a puppet
  Preaching the path from perdition
        Like a ventriloquist
              That speaks without our attention 
         Complacent in his own ignorance

Praying for the pleasantries
        Of innocence, descending;
                Through each pending day
                    As we once again say
             "It was the one, and only way"
   
Expressed by such a contradiction
             Of myself
       Treacherously trying to coincide
              With the conflict kept hidden
          In the phantom limbs
     That keeps gripping onto the past 
                     while the truth
          keeps slipping from my grasp   

06:56 PM - 26 Comments - 51 Kudos - Add Comment

Marked Hearing
Category: Writing and Poetry

Cut every cattle at the ear
            Or perhaps the pigs
         As you dig deeper
               Through the mud
                    To hear just one word
                       Drawn from the attention
                           Of such discipline
                   That marks each of our possessions

Show ownership
       In the methodology of transactions
   That spills more then tears
           From within the fringes
       That stem from our every fear

Distribute it equally
        Amongst the motivated
 As they come crawling forth for another hint
                 Another tax
                          Another allocation
              Seen from within the glass                  
        As they become captives to expenditures
                      Of institutions
             Capable of manipulation
                        Within a mere vision
              Manifested from on our TV screens
      
"Send me your money !!"
        In an injustice for all
               The price is presented
                   Within the proposition
                           As they are persecuted
           In the primaries before they face the final fall              

Look into me
       As you vicariously see
    The variability of revenue
         That has become pooled
                In the unspecified
      And cry when you crash like a bear
             That has no idea where to rest
                     Through an inevitable winter

Exposed by the polls
      Since every average John
            Gets sold short
      Every time they vote for another
            Influence that presents as politics

I might as well be called a federalist
      Drowning in a melting pot
                    Like a Morlock
               Where race is still an issue
         Influenced by the dominance
                   Of a romantic ideal
               In what could possibly be
                     Perceived as Eden
               If we could only come to feed
                      Upon an abundance of Eloi 

But id rather appreciate the fiction
         Hidden within an elaborate presentation
                That makes it seem as if
                       "We the people"
                   Have any control at all 

08:11 AM - 16 Comments - 38 Kudos - Add Comment

Back to the Front
Category: Writing and Poetry

Let the hot sharpened blade
    Cauterize their wounds
  While sunlight falls in the form of the ideal
          Upon every inch of your tempered steel

Feel the fury of the fight
         It becomes a right
      In the glory of this moment
             To leave aside all hindsight

Meet the skulls on the killing fields
      Shake hands with their icy grip
            And welcome the end
      Every liquid touch becomes an escape
                As it penetrates your veins

Carry me away to the day
         Of darkness that beckoned
       With desire for the instant
           When you could cut away
     Every enemy through the insanity
             Of an irrecoverable innocence
 
Murder at such a young age
         Leaves you astray in the temporal
       Building monuments from denial
            Lost between the shreds of society
                   As integrity becomes a construct

Indignation only grows
      During the short walk to the gallows
           Having been poisoned by the scenery
       Desperately in need of the bloody antidote
                     To stay violently happy
                         While on a quest to be cured

Lured to the frontlines
      As time slows to see the
             Vapor rising in the desert heat
           Never again to quench their thirst
  For their clouded delusions exceed my own      

Bludgeoned by broken men
     Left many miles behind
   It resides when you remember them
         In the final signatures from their pens

Heaven sent wrath
       On the wings of freewill
               To carry us to the cemeteries gates
                          "Abandon all Hope"
                       And carry forth your hate
           
It becomes a trial from the errors
         As we look within and see the horror

08:37 AM - 21 Comments - 56 Kudos - Add Comment

Periodicity
Category: Writing and Poetry

Be careful not to call me incurable
     As I perceive every curve
          With reverence;
     While you continue to sleep in innocence

Thinking of you waking
       Touching
             Caressing
          Within the absence
       Of the self in the moment
  Every time you stop breathing
          In order to feel alive

You can hide from everybody
          Except the fragile doll
                Sitting on the shelf
          Waiting to be broken
               In a self fulfilling prophecy
         
Fall away from reality
      Into the ecstasy of the moment
                Own it
  As it is the only thing the spirit can hold

Turn from me
          Turn from the questions
    Turn from the Integrity
            Hidden from me
                 In what seems like
         Pessimistic periodicity

The answers
       They were never meant for me
                      You knew long ago
                They were intended to hurt me
 

10:41 PM - 25 Comments - 60 Kudos - Add Comment

I Have a Dream !!
Category: Writing and Poetry

What do you seek to harness,
         Looking into this darkness.
       This listless sense of self that seeks
              Only to be touched.

Seen within the corner of consciences.
             Itself,
          Searching for the cure.
              Clutching before it all goes down,
       Drowning in what lies beneath.

Hiding from a home,
    Tied to the dark lyric: "I am not alone"
           As the truth is shown,
       In the reverie of just being at home.
 
Kill me softly,
    As malice is worn around your neck.
           Cut me courteously
        With that which exceeds my interests,
           While I begin to lay myself to rest.

I have found my piece,
         In the introspection of my self
               Projected upon another in innocence.
                           Lost,
                  In one subtle second
             Sent through from you to me.
          
It takes but one name,
      To remind ourselves of the pain.
             That I may never be enough,
                    Thus the fear begins to feed;
                             The greed,
                    That exceeds even me
    Overwhelming.
                 As it keeps entering,
                          Diluting,
              Disturbing me ,
                    Till I finally see
            Yet another reflection of me

It was upon an ocean,
         The potion of forethought
       Begging for absolution
   That I began to see you.
    Through the distance
             Reaching in one instant
          With increasing breaths,
                Taking the world in
                    As if it was the only thing left,
             While all else was burning in the fire of regret
                     Dried under the sun in the sands of Set
        

Who is more in the moment,
           A reptile:
                 in a fortified shell
       Swelling within from the hell of an instant
                   The rabbit:
             That has accustomed to winning
                        Purely out of habit,
              Or the ones left that keep on dreaming

10:37 PM - 22 Comments - 51 Kudos - Add Comment

Fallen
Category: Writing and Poetry

It has been blown upon my lips
      The self-righteous guilty kiss
           Which leave me listless
                 Is there any salvation
          Within a breath of insufflation  

Seal it in my heart from me
      Throw away the key
              Hide inside my aspirations
    How many years have I waited
         Another day, another life; wasted
          
Created from what was instigated
     White knuckles grip tight
              As only black sails take flight
                  Falling further into me
          Dying before I ever even hit the sea

An empty smile becomes me
       Hiding inside from one mind
              Time after time
        Split me again from duality
             Stop me before I bleed

A shadow has been cast
           Like a spell until the day I fall
                 Dizzy in the vertigo
                    As the spiral never ends
         Screaming as I am descending
              
"There must be serenity"              
Follow me D
                    O
                 W
                    N

Chase the dreams that never end
      Leave these walls in ruins
            Wake from your bed
                   Shake the foundation
                        And fly further into accretion
    
Selfishness consumes us
       Until the world is not enough
           Desiring the source of suffering
                  Through to the day
               When all is left behind

Feel it burn behind your eyes
     As you see in thirds
          The words pour forth from inside
              All the things of this world
                 They have no meaning
             Are they good enough for you?

The wind always blows
     In the appropriate direction
  Crumbling the concrete within its attrition 
        Its already been written on the walls
                       Let them all fall
             Or collapse and be another victim  

02:34 PM - 22 Comments - 54 Kudos - Add Comment

Ambiance
Category: Writing and Poetry

He holds the photos
       But has lost the recollection
     As she shows what rationale holds
            Hidden in his reflection

Pretend to send the invitation
          Project the words
                Without hesitation
    Breathing harder to be heard by him
        But the vapor was seen
            Long before it was ever felt
                Even on your skin  

Make the sounds
         You long to hear
                 Pushing about most
                       Like the rest
            As they are supposed
                To just see the imposter inside
                           Hyde-ing from that mirror    

Translate the code
     Feel the feed as it
            Creeps up in your mind
                  Every time the story gets old
           Take a hold of identity
                 Within the ecstasy of the moment

See yourself
       In the blank screen
            Being defined by the minute
                   Like a star in a movie
             The script runs its course
                      For a grander scheme

Feel the fire further in
       It burns your skin
              In every sober moment
         As you cannot see past the portal
              Purging perdition

Abandon the archetype
        That wanders the night
                  Feeding alone
       In a dark moment of acceptance
               The blood
          Alters the ambient light
    Breaking the beauty of harmony in a breath

It is meant to be
   Seeing it flow from within
          In a pending moment of peace
                    Releasing into one another  

03:14 PM - 18 Comments - 46 Kudos - Add Comment