MY DIARIA: Thoughts on Black Friday and The Economy
Category: Writing and Poetry

My friend Vicki Wagner blogged about the violence which occurred this Black Friday as massive crowds literally broke down doors at a store or two and in one case accidentally killed a store employee in the process.  This gave me a chance to write a vent-rant comment, which became this blog.

The insanity begins when people start lining up in front of stores at noon on Thanksgiving Day.  By the time they get near to the time for the store to open, which could be as early as 5 AM now, hunger, boredom, cold, lack of sleep and other people cutting in and positioning themselves to beat them through the door to some great sale which has limited quantities can really get their goat, I would imagine.  So it is fairly easy for it to become an angry stampede.  Still, it's pure animal behavior by then, and it makes anyone not involved ashamed to be part of the same species. 

It may be worse this year since there are probably many more people for whom a sale is the difference between being able to afford just what a loved one wants most or having to disappoint.  Some people take all that very seriously. 

I try to wait till early the following week, and have everything bought before my own birthday on the 17th.  That last week before Christmas is particularly busy.  Since I'm not an early riser, I prefer to go after 9 PM.  Often it's amazing how few people realize stores are open later during the Christmas shopping season.  They'll stand for hours to be first into the stores on Black Friday, yet will not venture out past mid-evening after that.  Go figger.

(Vicki asked readers if they had a "Black Friday Stupidity Story" they could share.)  I have no Black Friday stupidity story, but I think the general stupidity at this point is listening to TV news to guide you.  They are saying you must NOT buy much this season because of the possibility the whole world economy could collapse.  Yes, I think it is very healthy to live your life according to all the worst case scenarios that MIGHT occur.  NOT.  And of course there is really no such thing as a self-fulfilling prophecy, any more than there is no such thing as a conspiracy. 

Average American Citizen watching MSNBC?

22:04 - 21 Comments - 18 Kudos - Add Comment

POEM: Natural Artist
Category: Writing and Poetry

This is my contribution to the Simple Sunday poetry challenge on the CPCCC.  The muse was the art below by Darrell Shepherd  aka "The Wizard of Awwws."  

My friend Glenn did a "Mirror Cinquain" on the CPCCC Saturday share blog yesterday, so in order to try to keep up with the Vadneys, I had to try one. 

Natural Artist

A Mirror Cinquain

Slowly
transformed by time.
Sienna sandstone mass,
carved by Mother Nature's own hand,
becomes
sculpture:
monolithic columns, pillars.
Variegated landscape
subtly changes
daily.

© 2008 RGD

2-4-6-8-2 syllables in each of five lines.  A mirror version then reverses the order with another five lines 2-8-6-4-2.  I think.  LOL

06:14 - 6 Comments - 6 Kudos - Add Comment

HUMOR POEM: Lord Godiva’s Ride (Warning: R rated!)
Category: Writing and Poetry

This is a second offering for the CPCCC Saturday share blog.  I posted it under my alter ego Comedian Professor Bob, who does not post much anymore, to give him some exercise, and to deflect the ire of prudes away from myself LOL. 

Sorry if the pic below offends, there are absolutely NO relatively modest pics of men riding bareback and naked on P-bucket, and frankly the sexism involved in what's available there offends ME far more than the occasional (temporary, since they eventually delete stuff even tamer than this) nude image. 

Lord Godiva's Ride

A Cheryl's Pals' Collab

by Scotorum

There's snowflakes swirling in the air.
Good thing that I'm not running bare!
Although I've done that on a dare,
while riding on a swayback mare
to the old Scarborough fair,
where merchant princes stopped to stare.
(I think I'm on a rhyming tear!)

Onlookers thought it slightly queer.
I shrugged it off, so high on beer!
They yelled:  "this escapade's absurd!"
I was so drunk, I flipped a bird!

I rode on through Scarborough town
still wearing only birthday gown.
Some townfolk laughed to hear me sing
when reins did sting against my thing.

While ladies blushed and looked away,
and minister made moves to pray,
I galloped on in way most crass,
still bouncing on my cold bare...mare.

I wish there was a way to end
this bizarre tale without offend-
ing any of my sweet dear readers.
Butt I just have to this append:
I raised my moon, screamed "Bottomfeeders!"

© 2008 RGD

First line by Lady "Cheryl" Death

03:08 - 10 Comments - 10 Kudos - Add Comment

POEM: Flurries

This is my main entry in this week's CPCCC Saturday share blog.  The muse line was "snowflakes swirling in the air."

Flurries

A Cheryl's Pals' Collab

by Scotorum

Snowflakes swirling in the air,
falling gently in my hair;
floating down without a care,
coating glasses which shade from glare.

Snowflakes swirling in the air
remind me of my lady fair;
the one for whom I deeply care;
the one for whom my life's to spare.

So many different facets seen
when taking in her soul's bright sheen.
Her purity of spirit's such,
I just must love her very much!

But unlike snowflakes in the air
such warmth I feel from her bold stare,
that I'm the one who melts away,
swooning sweet beneath her sway.

Accumulating on the ground,
both snowflakes and my love abound.
Her cheery presence lifts this boy
to heights of unimagined joy.

© 2008 RGD

First line of the first two stanzas by Lady "Cheryl" Death

02:59 - 4 Comments - 4 Kudos - Add Comment

POEM: Contemplating True Love
Category: Writing and Poetry

We're doing freeform about things that are on our mind today at the CPCCC Friggin' Fabulously Fun Friday Fling that I host.  Here's my example/contribution.  Hope you can stop over and give a look, a read, a comment and/or a write!

True Love

Thinking today of just how strong
true love is.
and of just what it is.
I mean, is there such a thing
as false love?
Of course there is.
But what makes true love true?
Fidelity?
Correctness?
Durability?

I don't know.
It's something very special, I know that.
When I was teaching,
I used to write a lot of multiple choice questions.
Maybe the right answer here is:
all of the above.

I know that what I feel is very special.
Everything I ever hoped it could be.
Far more than I ever expected.
When it came, it was a huge surprise.
Every day, I continue to be surprised:
That it's not only lasted, but grown.
That it's deeper every day;
That it's more wonderful;
I...love it.  

To that special person in my life,
the one who has put love on my mind today
and every day for so long,
I only have one more thing to say.
One little thing;
Something I've never been more sure about:

I love you.

© 2008 RGD

Currently listening : True Love Release date: 2005-12-06

02:18 - 8 Comments - 6 Kudos - Add Comment

POEM: Thanks
Category: Writing and Poetry

Thanks

Thankful for the ones I love;
the ones who love me back;
Everyone who calls me friend;
has talents that I lack.

I'm grateful for the things I have
and for some things I don't.
For people who protect my right
to own what I will and won't.

Appreciation emanates
to those who've helped me live;
who paid me some to do my best
to give all I could give.

I thank the source of all creation
for my surroundings' beauty;
for all the substance I partake;
fine life-sustaining booty.

But most of all I'm thankful for
the gift of life I'm given
The joy of living every day;
my existential heaven.

© 2008 RGD

06:05 - 26 Comments - 24 Kudos - Add Comment

POEM; Symbiosis Two
Category: Writing and Poetry

I wrote this poem for Vicki Wagner's latest picture challenge.  She is so busy in nursing school that she has not had much time to do these lately, so I wanted to be sure to give this one a try.  If memory serves at least vaguely, I already titled one of my poems "Symbiosis," a word that worked here too, so I just numbered this one, which in this case also emphasized interaction.

Symbiosis Two

Golden sunrays through the trees
bring romantics to their knees
to thank creator, kindly sage
for decorating their life's stage.

Wafting through still forest air,
a piney fragrance lingers there.
Lovers strolling from the dark
enchanted depths of passion's spark.

Out in dappled light of clearing
they see destiny appearing
bright and clear as morning dewdrops.
Enlightened souls exchange teardrops.

Such a journey every lover
takes in order to discover
one who shares those joyous states
when nature's light illuminates.

© 2008 RGD

01:18 - 14 Comments - 12 Kudos - Add Comment

POEM: A Scottish Villanelle?
Category: Writing and Poetry

This is my slightly belated entry in the CPCCC Simple Sunday challenge.  The muse image below is by Bluerose. 

My poem is not a proper Villanelle due to no rhymes, but it's the way the lines came out on their own, so rather than take an hour or two to try to contort them to fit the genuine format, I just went with it as is.  Let's call it a Scottish version of the French Villanelle.  

Must Be the Moonlight


Must be the moonlight
that makes me this way.
Blame it on the moon.

My heart beats faster
when I see your face.
Must be the moonlight.

I am transported
by love in your eyes.
Blame it on the moon.

My lips on your lips
seem heaven on earth.
Must be the moonlight.

Bodies caressing.
Sunbursts reflected.
Blame it on the moon.

Celestial bond?
Lunar magnetics?
Must be the moonlight.
Blame it on the moon.

© 2008 RGD

14:53 - 14 Comments - 14 Kudos - Add Comment

POEM: Sleigh Play
Category: Writing and Poetry

Here is my offering for this week's Saturday share blog on the CPCCC.  The muse line we had to use in some form in our poems was "some things just feel so right."

Sleigh Play

She came with me into the night
We took a sleighride, held on tight
She held me close with all her might;
My ardor rose and lust took flight.

Groping her just seemed so right!

But darn, she slapped me on the face!
Then sprayed me with a can of mace!
Sleigh horse ran off into the woods
because I'd toyed with rider's goods.

Now I am wiser when I play.
A lesson learned that fateful day:
If you are driving horse-drawn sleigh,
don't grope unless you know the way!

© 2008 RGD

The line-givers who horsed around in this poem: A Rhodi, Cherie, Lady "Cheryl" Death.

Currently listening : Winter Wonderland By Various Artists Release date: 2002-11-12

04:41 - 14 Comments - 12 Kudos - Add Comment

POEMS: Hillary Pilloried! And Other Nonsense, with Updates!
Category: Writing and Poetry

I'm hosting the CPCCC Friday Fling again.  I'm getting lazy, ...ok even lazier, so I'm just gonna post the whole blog here and you can go over there and post anything that comes to mind.  I'll put some I did at the bottom.

Now that it's getting near Thanksgiving, I'm sure you've already seen a blog or three about what people are or should be thankful for.  Which is all very fine and inspirational and everything.  But...I thought, how about celebrating what we're NOT thankful for? 

That stuff never gets the attention it deserves.  You know, the things that you were worried about that never happened after all, or were not as bad as you expected.  Or what (or who) you just wish would go away.

Let's get more specific.  We're all media hounds to one degree or another.  All sorts of people are or become famous because they are in the news, on TV or other entertainment venues.  How about writing about someone you are NOT thankful is famous? 

I'll try to make it easier for those of you who, like Bambi's friend Thumper said his mom told him, prefer not to make fun of or say something bad about anyone.  You can make it funny by writing it as a Clerihew.  No, that's not Howdy Doody's clown friend.  It's a short poetry format which is supposed to be amusing, about a famous person. 

Wickedpedia has this to say about a Clerihew:

A clerihew has the following properties:

It is biographical and usually whimsical, showing the subject from an unusual point of view; it pokes fun at mostly famous people.  It has four lines of irregular length (for comic effect); the third and fourth lines are usually longer than the first two.  The rhyme structure is AABB; the subject matter and wording are often humorously contrived in order to achieve a rhyme.

The first line consists solely (or almost solely) of the subject's name. Clerihews are not satirical or abusive, but they target famous individuals and reposition them in an absurd or commonplace setting, often giving them an over-simplified and slightly garbled description (similar to the schoolboy style of 1066 and All That).

Practitioners

The form was invented by and is named after Edmund Clerihew Bentley. As a 16-year-old student at St Paul's School in London, Bentley invented the clerihew on Humphry Davy (see below) when the lines came to his mind during a science class, [1] and it was a great hit with his friends. 

The first use of the word in print was in 1928.  Clerihew published three volumes of his own clerihews, including Biography for Beginners (1905), which was published under the name "E. Clerihew".

Bentley's friend, G. K. Chesterton, was also a practitioner of the clerihew and one of the sources of its popularity. Chesterton provided the illustrations for Biography for Beginners. Other serious authors also produced clerihews, including W. H. Auden, and it remains a popular humorous form among other writers and the general public.

Examples

The first ever clerihew was written about Sir Humphry Davy:

Sir Humphry Davy
Was not fond of gravy.
He lived in the odium
Of having discovered sodium.

Other classic clerihews by Bentley included:

 

George the Third
Ought never to have occurred.
One can only wonder
At so grotesque a blunder.


John Stuart Mill,
By a mighty effort of will,
Overcame his natural bonhomie
And wrote Principles of Political Economy.

In 1983, Games Magazine ran a contest titled "Do You Clerihew?" The winning entry was:

Did Descartes
Depart
With the thought
"Therefore I'm not"?

A Dozen Doozies - or Dontzies

Hillary Clinton
Had a bright glint in
her eye to be President.
Wrong one for that precedent.

© 2008 RGD

I know as much of Cyrus,
as writing on Papyrus.
Still I'd like to see you deck him.
Can you kick like David Beckham?

© 2008 RGD

Linda Lovelace was a whore
whose knees got sore
upon the floor.
Never satisfied, it seems
Until she serviced Harry Reems!

© 2008 RGD

02:10 - 14 Comments - 10 Kudos - Add Comment