Still shining

Whoops, forgot to let you all know that we still exist.  We lost the office when we went home for break, but we still have our workspace and funding (neither were in danger).

Anyway, a new issue came out at the beginning of this month and the next will be early March.  We're also in the process of setting up a Koala Comedy Night with San Diego's best comics, scheduled for mid March.  Keep checking thekoala.org for up-to-the-minute weather conditions.

7:57 PM - 1 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

The Cold War continues

Day 26: The administration has pretty much left us alone because they're scared of a confrontation. They know we're crazy and armed with a camera and enough tricks to make Macaulay Culkin jealous.
All the bureaucrats keep doing is offering the same bullshit appeal over and over, even though we've strongly and formally objected to it (it would be all in writing, solely and secretly presided by an enemy administrator - Gary Ratcliff, no chance to depose witnesses, no ability to examine evidence).
So now we'll challenge these douchebags to the traditional Koala method of arbitration: a drink-off.

7:26 PM - 2 Comments - 4 Kudos - Add Comment

Winning after 1 week

It's already been a week. The administration is stalemated right now, so everything's low intensity. Watch for us to make our moves ... eventually. No other incidents stick out since Friday, but the bureaucrats are really worried about their door. We're worried about having enough porn in the office.

2:09 PM - 0 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

Koala Under Siege, Day 2

Two incidents stick out so far:
1. Yesterday morning, as I was being interviewed by three camera crews, I looked out our door and saw the man assigned to change our lock walk up, look in, and immediately turn around.
2. Two cops and one locksmith came in at 5:50 this morning to change the lock on our door. They walk up to the door, only to notice there is no longer a door.
Point is, the administration has totally underestimated us. Other point is, we're still here, we're getting publicity, and therefore we're winning.

The next issue is at the printers as I write. Look for it at UCSD Monday.

8:42 AM - 0 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

They tryin' to catch us ridin' dirty

The administration is trying to kick us out of our office for allegedly finding a bong with residue which allegedly tested positive for weed. They also claim to have found booze in the office. Point is this is crap since the Koala would never leave unsmoked resin in a bong. We handcuffed ourselves to the door and are using our bodies as a human petition for people to sign. Come by the Koala office and keep us company you might even get on the news. So far we've been there for 13 hours ha ha. Peace.  Oh yeah and we're totally innocent, they "found" that bong last year, not one person on staff was even here last year.  I say "found" cause they've shown us no evidence at all, only an eviction notice.

9:33 PM - 0 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

First Fall Issue Tomorrow

After a summer of hard work and harder drinking, the first issue of the school year is ready to hit UCSD tomorrow.  Look for it at www.thekoala.org by mid-week at latest.

In this issue, you'll find guides to the world's lamest Greek system (the one at UCSD), on how to date your idiot classmates, and on how to steal that Guardian golf cart parked next to Porter's Pub.  Get lecture notes from Prof. Mel Gibson, see the first installment of the Buddy Fucker, and check out all of the usual features, including retarded personals sent in by retarded people like you.

10:10 PM - 0 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

Watermelons and Armageddons

So the 666 issue came out on 6/6/06 and was a big hit.  You may have seen us driving a golf cart with painted teeth on the front like madmen or dressed up as bums with apocalyptical cardboard signs.  The cover was fucking insane. 

The watermelon drop went off today for another year in a row, the oldest tradition at UCSD and still not a soul has pranked it.  Not even me.

That's about it, come to the End of the Year party on Friday 6/9/06.  It'll be nutz.  Call 534-EDNA and ask, "where the party at?" for directions. There will be a hot tub, pool table, pinball, darts, kegs, and bottles of free champagne given away like candy.  It starts at the usual party time.

1:16 PM - 2 Comments - 1 Kudos - Add Comment

Military coup

This is Davey.   We've staged a military coup.  Although Brad retains editorial control, but I now have control of this blog.  Check out our new issue at the www.koala.org.  Here's the one line (outside of lists) that I wrote: "UCSD: Six colleges, one great big target."  Damn, I am so much better than anyone else in the organization.   Especially better than Brad, probably the best editor [content-wise] we've had in years.

6:31 PM - 1 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

Random Shit Today

Today on library walk while there was Korean BBq this chick ended up walking up to Mike Sowers and just macking on him.  He said she was pretty hammered but he ended up taking her back to the tee pee in the Che Cafe Peace Gardens. 

Patricia Mahaffey, Dean of Student Affairs Muir College walks up to Brian Barton while he is gathering his megaphone, ego sized posters of him, and people chanting his name.  Nevertheless despite the presence of three alumnus K staff members who took up all her office hours, she didn't call the po-lice! CoinidentallyBarton's congressional opponent was also on campus as to which he walked into the meeting disrupted the entire event and an assitant gave Ms. Davis an envelope.  Seriously, none of us know that guy.

2:53 AM - 0 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

Winter Issue 1 Awesome Cover!!!!

No one has been on here for a while. In the time that's gone our editor lit his face on fire. OUCH!

Distribution of the brand new issue has come and gone.

On the first day of distribution one of our members was in a fight, on national news, and hit on by the hottest girls on campus.  The issue is good, especially the cover.  Check it out, here (.pdf)

2:55 PM - 0 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment