WHISPER MY NAME (185th)
Current mood: depressed
Category: Writing and Poetry

The hardest part is living with these voices
constantly talking, screaming, begging, pleading
these little voices of doubt and despair
speaking of everything that I am needing.
I lie alone in the darkest watches of the night
staring at emptiness so vast and cold
my soul shudders to take it all in: I see the future
and in that future I am alone and grown old.
I yearn for so much more. My heart aches
to share with someone all that I am, will be.
Yet I am abed with no comfort, no warmth,
save the pillows and some dreamy fantasy.
I am wasted, am spent, am run dry in pursuit
of what I fear I shall never attain;
it seems, again, as so oft before that I am
left to dwell in the depths of deepest pain.
Love has grown, has dwindled, has flown.
Love is dead to me, wilted on the vine.
Love is atrophied, a useless thing of beauty.
Love cannot in this lifetime be mine.
Reality must be accepted, so I boldly stride ahead,
yet knowledge and acceptance are not the same.
I know that I will walk alone through life,
yet hold hope that someone will whisper my name.

© November 17, 2008

4:06 PM - 2 Comments - 4 Kudos - Add Comment

WHAT IF (184th)
Category: Writing and Poetry

What if
there is only one chance
only one opportunity
to share true happiness?
What if
life is extinguished before
words can be spoken
and love shared?
I ponder too often on what if...
what if things had been different
what if I had been better
what if my heart were not broken.
What if this is all there is?
What if the here and now
is all that truly matters,
if loving and living
are one and the same?
I make no apologies
for being emotional,
for delving so deeply
into the morass of pain
that broken relationships
and broken lives have
bequeathed me with.
I live to the fullest,
each hour, each day,
and pay for it in hurt at times.
Yet never will I be able to say
that I let what ifs rule me.

© September 21st, 2008

6:47 PM - 2 Comments - 4 Kudos - Add Comment

FOR ALLY (183rd)
Category: Writing and Poetry

The hours creep by
a never-ending parade of wondering
thoughts all in ruins
from sudden sundering
of bonds thought unbreakable.
The endless marches of the night
bring no respite,
no sleep for the weary,
this mind too confused.
I wonder what I should do
could have done
to prevent this separation.
Were there limitations
to your love, to my attention?
Did I not offer enough affection?
I give you space,
though I die not hearing you,
not gazing into eyes
soft and sincere.
Now I fear-
fear I have lost
and that the cost
is too much for my soul to bear.
I love you, I miss you,
I need you.
Please come back
take my hand
walk with me, be with me
complete me.
You found me when
I had given up all hope:
find me again
before all hope is gone.
I wait and watch
a silent phone
wonder when you will come back home
back to a heart so full of love
it breaks to be without you.
I need you so
yet I must let you go
and pray on burdened knees
with burdened soul
that you will return
and make me whole.

© September 18, 2008

5:15 AM - 1 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

GOODBYE [182nd]
Category: Writing and Poetry

The darkest hours of night close in
to match my darkening heart;
the brightest ray of sunshine gone,
a young life torn apart.
In but a single moment,
in the quick blink of an eye,
she is lost forever,
lost to eternal skies.
I wish I had another word,
another conversation
to let you know just how I felt,
to live in life's elation.
God stretched out His mighty hand
and took you way too fast:
now I wrestle with my memories,
my future now my past.
I wish to rail at sea and sky,
to make my anguish known-
but that would be incongrous
to all the kindness you had shown.
Would that I could give my life
so that you again could live,
to have your brightness in this world-
that's a sacrifice I would give.
I miss you, I love you, I'll remember you
though I live a thousand years;
my heart, my soul, they bleed for you
through a million tears.
Rest in peace, Charity.

IN MEMORIUM Charity Noel Taylor  Nov. 26, 1982-Dec. 21, 2007

© December 23, 2007

8:47 PM - 4 Comments - 6 Kudos - Add Comment

FOR CHARITY [181st]
Category: Writing and Poetry

You were always there
to brighten my day,
a smile, a kind word,
a wise-cracking retort.
You were sweet and sincere,
beautiful and genuine,
an angel sent to walk
among we mere mortals.
I cannot describe how
my life was touched
just by knowing you,
how you filled my heart
with gladness with but a thought.
I can't believe you're gone.
I keep waiting to hear from you,
waiting to see a practical joke
take place....but it will not.
The cruelest joke of all
has been played,
taking one so young,
so vibrant,
so full of life and joy
from this dark and dreary world.
Everyone that knew you
loved you.
Look down on us
from where you rest now,
comfort us in our selfish misery.
Remind us of how you lived,
that we might touch others
as you so touched us.
I miss you.
Rest in peace, Charity.
We all join you too soon.

RIP Charity Noel Taylor

© December 23, 2007

11:49 AM - 4 Comments - 8 Kudos - Add Comment

ABORTED [180th]
Category: Writing and Poetry

The alarm goes off,
buzzing and annoying,
jangling her nerves,
dispersing her nightmares.
Today is the day.
She rises and dressses,
never once pausing
to look into the mirror.
She cannot;
cannot bear to see herself,
see her own accusing eyes,
the bags underneath
testament to
her tortured soul.
She hurries outside
starts up the car
drives to work in a rush.
On the way out,
she passes the school,
children laughing at play,
and the tears come
brutal and bountiful,
ripped from her soul,
falling in torrents.
He would have been two.
He'd already be walking,
talking, smiling, laughing.
She has to pull over and cry,
she wishes that she
could just die.
It seemed like the right thing,
two long years ago-
what did she know about
children?
How could she raise one,
support one, love one,
when she could barely control
her own life?
The guy didn't love her,
didn't offer to help her,
in fact cursed and
called her a liar.
So she borrowed the money
went to the clinic
and had them terminate
her firstborn.
She remembers
the bleeding, the cramping-
it seemed her insides
would come out.
It was as if there was
something- someone else-
rebelling, holding to life.
And then it was over,
and she felt so hollow-
where life grew now there
was nothing.
She lays her head on the
steering wheel
and lets emotion carry her away.
Each day since has been hard,
but this day especially
each year.
The birthday
for a child never born,
where she gave up
and gave in.

© December 18, 2007

8:34 AM - 5 Comments - 12 Kudos - Add Comment

LOVE [179th]
Category: Writing and Poetry

Take this fragile, broken heart
and hold it in your hands.
Of all the girls that came before,
I think you understand.
Take me on a journey
where I so long to be;
safe, secure, in love at last
with you in love with me.
Take this shattered, tortured man,
mend him with your kiss.
I dreamt so often of perfection,
but found none to compare to this.
Lead me to the quiet ways
where love can root and grow-
take my love, and in return,
your love on me bestow.
Take my hand, and though the years
fly by with gathering speed,
let me become your greatest hope
as you are all I need.

© December 10, 2007

4:37 PM - 9 Comments - 18 Kudos - Add Comment

GOOD ENOUGH FOR ME [178th]
Category: Writing and Poetry

She's not picture perfect,
but she's good enough for me.
She may not have the longest legs,
breasts as big as watermelons;
she snorts a little when she laughs,
has a smart retort to everything,
but she's good enough for me.
Each little imperfection,
each birthmark, each stray hair
stands out in my mind
as a guidepost on the
marvelous journey she is to me.
She doesn't need to be a genius
(she's far from dumb, you know),
she doesn't need to be a supermodel-
she's the epitomy of beauty in my eyes.
She may not be
what others think I want or need,
but she's good enough for me.
I don't want her to agree
with every word that I speak,
don't want her to submit so easily,
so, no she's not "perfect"-
she's good enough for me.

© December 5, 2007

6:09 PM - 7 Comments - 15 Kudos - Add Comment

THE SMILE [177th] collaboration with Tanya
Category: Writing and Poetry

Words that sent me boiling
Images eating me alive
What I would only give
To give ecstasy a dive

To know that I could
Unleash completely
To be able to devour
In turn, same to me

Inch by inch so gently
Only for fury to unleash
Lessons in this passion
No one could ever teach

Thoughts wistfully tramping
An entirely new world created
One filled with possibilities
With feelings; never sedated

Sleeping restlessly at night
Dreaming of just a taste
Cloaked in masked smells
Mingling together with paste

It all began so innocently
Back and forth playfully
Teasing, taunting, flirting
What was happening to me

She said come to see me
And my blood began to rise
Our possible sexy encounters
Made my manhood come alive

The pictures I keep replaying
Her legs spread open wide
Fingers intermingling
A smile she couldn't hide

I closed the door
Dimmed the lights
Pictures put in place
One of my best nights

I roared to life again
Imagining her in the flesh
There's no better fantasy
Than imagining our bodies mesh

My release bring me peace
For just a moment again
But waiting on the moment
When I can commit my sins

My mind keeps replaying
Her legs spread open wide
Imaging me deep within her
And that smile she can't hide

© December 4, 2007

7:52 PM - 3 Comments - 6 Kudos - Add Comment

THE SMILE [177th] collaboration with Tanya
Category: Writing and Poetry

Words that sent me boiling
Images eating me alive
What I would only give
To give ecstasy a dive

To know that I could
Unleash completely
To be able to devour
In turn, same to me

Inch by inch so gently
Only for fury to unleash
Lessons in this passion
No one could ever teach

Thoughts wistfully tramping
An entirely new world created
One filled with possibilities
With feelings; never sedated

Sleeping restlessly at night
Dreaming of just a taste
Cloaked in masked smells
Mingling together with paste

It all began so innocently
Back and forth playfully
Teasing, taunting, flirting
What was happening to me

She said come to see me
And my blood began to rise
Our possible sexy encounters
Made my manhood come alive

The pictures I keep replaying
Her legs spread open wide
Fingers intermingling
A smile she couldn't hide

I closed the door
Dimmed the lights
Pictures put in place
One of my best nights

I roared to life again
Imagining her in the flesh
There's no better fantasy
Than imagining our bodies mesh

My release bring me peace
For just a moment again
But waiting on the moment
When I can commit my sins

My mind keeps replaying
Her legs spread open wide
Imaging me deep within her
And that smile she can't hide

© December 4, 2007

7:52 PM - 9 Comments - 18 Kudos - Add Comment