Decatur, Illinois!
Current mood: chipper
Category: Movies, TV, Celebrities

I just returned from Decatur, where we're filming a movie called "The Informant." Steven Soderbergh is directing it, and Matt Damon is in it, and I think that what the studio is doing is they've decided to promote the Steven Soderbergh/Matt Damon thing in a much more prominent way than they're promoting me being in it. Okay, whatever. I guess somebody just doesn't look at blogs... but they're nice guys and we're having a good time.

Decatur is farmland. Flat flatty flat flat, with corn, soybeans, and a few trees planted around farmhouses to block the wind. And what country house would be complete without a cement deer out in front? My Dad loved this stuff, but since we lived in the city and didn't have room for deer, he put a cement dog in front of our house. Brown and white paint with a couple of black spots sprayed on, until the rain finally washed off the paint and the cement started to crack. He loved that dog, though, and wouldn't get rid of it even when the tail became a dangerous re-bar spike jutting out of the lump of plaster that we had to avoid while playing wiffle ball or someone might get impaled by a decorative beagle. We finally moved out of the city to the suburbs, and a bigger lawn. What did Dad do? He went out and got a brand new dog, a clone of the original. Even when he had room for a deer, Dad decided that loyalty to a cement dog trumped the antlers of the nouveau riche.

Love from Wilson World,
Tom

11:53 AM - 4 Comments - 12 Kudos - Add Comment

Squadron
Current mood: chipper
Category: Art and Photography

A while ago, I wrote about losing a lot of my paintings when the Riley Arts Gallery in Manhattan Beach was completely destroyed in a fire. It was hard to lose so much work, and for a while I've been spinning my wheels, staring at blank canvases, starting a few paintings only to scrape them off or leave them half finished to paint over with white and start a different painting later. But I'm happy with this painting. It's about finished, and is 54x54". "Squadron" is its title, and before I sell it I think I'll hang it up in the house and look at it for a while.

Love from Wilson World,
Tom

8:34 AM - 6 Comments - 12 Kudos - Add Comment

Wet Cake, Moist Pastrami
Current mood: chipper
Category: Travel and Places

The subway in Los Angeles cost billions of dollars and goes nowhere, but I took a fun train ride to Macarthur Park the other day, where someone left a cake out in the rain, and Langer's deli, where someone left a pastrami sandwich out on my table. Langer's prides itself in the world's best pastrami, and it was worth the train ride, and short walk past a multicultural carnival of counterfeit green card dealers and guys with tattoos on their necks. It's a great sandwich, and the pickle counts as a vegetable, so there's a health food aspect to the whole thing. I think there are seeds in rye bread as well, and besides, I put Sweet and Low in my iced tea. I recommend you go to Langer's, have a sandwich, tell them I sent you, and on the way home, stop by a folding card table and pick yourself up a fake Social Security card!

Love from Wilson World,
Tom

1:06 PM - 4 Comments - 8 Kudos - Add Comment

My trip to Dayton, Ohio!
Current mood: chipper
Category: Travel and Places

Dayton is one of those great American cities with an inferiority complex. The people are great, the shows are fun, but it seems that after every one, this is a common conversation:

"Loved the show, Tom! What do you think of Dayton?"
"Dayton is great! Lots of nice people!"
"What are you, crazy? I can’t wait to get out of this boring hell hole!"
"...Uh...okay, well, thanks for coming!"

The comedy club is situated in the middle of one of those art directed shopping villages, a little fake town with lots of windows full of mock turtlenecks, smelly candles, and security cameras. My favorite selection was "peace" necklaces hanging next to the pocket sized cans of mace.

The weather has been cold and grey, so I’m using a photo of my wife’s roses from Easter. Pretend it’s Dayton. And you’re happily shopping for candles and mace.

Love from Wilson World,
Tom

12:25 AM - 3 Comments - 4 Kudos - Add Comment

Botox in the Desert
Current mood: chipper
Category: Travel and Places

Just back from Palm Springs, where I performed a private show for the makers of Botox. Yes, standup comedy for people who can’t move their face. When they laughed it looked like a large group of coughing ventriloquists, but everybody looked really young, except for their necks. The highlight of any trip across the desert is a stop at Hadley’s market, a store that sells date shakes, ostrich and buffalo burgers, trail mix and licorice, along with a huge assortment of dried fruit. It’s a great place that used to be a lone shack in the middle of the desert, now surrounded by an outlet mall, diners and mini-markets, and that ubiquitous monolith two hours outside of every city, the neon flashing indian casino. Just what Hadley’s needed, Polo shirts pretending to be on sale and blackjack.

God(tm) bless(R) America(Copyright2008GodblessAmericacorp.)

Love from Wilson World,
Tom

8:56 AM - 2 Comments - 2 Kudos - Add Comment

Free Shampoo!
Current mood: chipper
Category: Life

Just back from North Carolina and had a fabulous time with friends, one of whom is the Assistant Attorney General of North Carolina. Unfortunately, I didn't get any traffic tickets or entangled in a huge zoning battle while I was there, so I didn't get to use my powerful connections at all. They took me to "Cooper's" for some great "Eastern North Carolina" barbecue (there is a difference), and we had a wonderful time, hanging out and enjoying the first hints of spring on a perfect day. In Raleigh they have this cart at the hotel that serves free shampoo, soap, and pens, too. There was a broom and some dirty towels on it, but I didn't want any of them. As far as shampoo in tiny bottles, though? I'm taken care of.

Love from Wilson World,
Tom

10:40 AM - 11 Comments - 18 Kudos - Add Comment

Denver!
Current mood: chipper
Category: Life

Just back from a week at the Denver Improv, a beautiful venue with super people. It was warm and sunny when I got there, then we had a howling blizzard, and it was warm and sunny when I left. Strange weather, but a bunch of great shows. A highlight of the trip was my visit to Bass Pro Shops "Outdoor World," a gigantic store full of hundreds of stuffed bear, deer, bison, moose, raccoons, and a lake sized fish tank, full of game fish and catching a thundering waterfall from the second story. The raccoon above is holding a Moon Pie. I think that says it all. Well, I'm not really sure what that says, other than they have so many stuffed animals that they can shove a Moon Pie between one of its paws. Another stuffed raccoon was holding up a bucket full of "Jeff Foxworthy's Grillin' Sauce!" - I'm not kidding - but that picture came out blurry.

Love from Wilson World,
Tom

9:34 AM - 3 Comments - 4 Kudos - Add Comment

Hermosa Beach!
Current mood: chipper
Category: Travel and Places

9:41 PM - 3 Comments - 6 Kudos - Add Comment

My Trip to Kansas City!
Current mood: chipper
Category: Travel and Places

It's impossible to have a bad meal in Kansas City because of the beef. They put slabs of Kansas City beef in everything there. Vegetarians in Kansas City have petitioned to have beef considered a sort of thick, juicy cabbage-like product. If you think about it, if you stare at a steer for long enough and they stand really still it can look as though they're growing out of the ground. Don't try to fertilize one, though. I had a wonderful time at the Majestic Theatre there, and everyone was great. The radio and T.V. interviews were plentiful and fun, and I was amazed to find out that I was the final - I mean THE FINAL guest on the historic K.C. rock station KY. They've been on the air for decades, and ... well ... right after my interview - GONE. They were turning off desk lamps and taking down Duran Duran posters as I was talking. Sorry, KY. Now it's going to be one of those disembodied computer stations called "The Boulevard," run by HAL 9000 and Lumberg. (to get the previous reference you had to have seen the movies "2001: A Space Odyssey, AND "Office Space." Sorry.)

Love from Wilson World,
Tom

9:46 AM - 0 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

Join me on Facebook!
Current mood: chipper
Category: Movies, TV, Celebrities

Hey everyone!

I've set up a Fan Page on Facebook so you can see what's coming up there too.

Here is the link:

Click here for my Facebook Page

Love from Wilson World,
Tom

10:23 AM - 4 Comments - 8 Kudos - Add Comment