Adult male who is registered to vote runs cell phone through washing machine! Film at 11:00.
Category: Web, HTML, Tech
The list of utterly Darwin Award worthy idiotic thingsI've done in my life is much longer than I'd care to admit. But yesterday took the taco! I sent the one device no modern day human being above the age of eight can survive without through the washing machine. That's right… I laundered my cell phone.
IDIOT!
I share this for two reasons.
Reason number one was to offset the high points of my life that I usually only write about on here. Thus divulging my spectacular nincompoopery and giving you the whole picture of James.
IDIOT!
But secondly, when I first discovered what I'd done and was a little panicked about what I should do, I actually learned that there is a way to resuscitate a cell phone after going through an entire washer (and dryer!) cycle. You remove the battery and soak the phone in alcohol. A heap o' people swear by it. The idea is that the alcohol displaces any water and/or soap and then evaporates quickly leaving your phone good as new.
I tried it and was somewhat successful. My fear regarding my particular phone was that I have a smartphone with a touchscreen. I wondered if the touchscreen would be able to withstand the moisture and the alcohol. My fear was correct. The touchscreen didn't make it. But everything else that is strictly electronic on the phone came right back to life. So if you have a flip phone or any other traditional kind of phone that doesn't have a touchscreen, you ought to be able to try the alcohol trick and move on with a perfectly functional (and clean) phone.
The pearl in the oyster for me is that even though my phone is technically kaput, I do have a replacement on the way, and the fluffed and folded phone does work well enough to where I'll be able to transfer all of my contacts etc off of it. So there's no need for any of you to resend me your numbers. I still have them.
Love you guys.
-James the Chucklehead
I'm going to go out on a limb and guess that I'm first person in history to say the word nincompoopery on MySpace.
Happy Memorial Day and thank you to our troops!
Category: Life
I was watching the Cubs game today when a commercial came on. It was one of those commercials where the product wasn't immediately identified. It was simply a scene in an airport. From a jetway comes a group of male and female American soldiers in fatigues. One civilian traveler notices them and starts clapping. Then another. Then another. Eventually everyone within a hundred yards of the troops are standing and clapping and cheering as the troops continued on toward their connecting flights. As the troops amble down the terminal they just quietly soak in the warm reception. In individual close up shots the eyes of each soldier clearly tell us how touched they are that their decisions to serve their country means something to the citizens they are serving. This was all happening in slightly slowed motion with a soundtrack of strings sustained underneath. The commercial ended with the Budweiser logo and two simple words – "Thank you."
I was so moved by this commercial, but I was with company when I saw it so I had to prevent myself from becoming a blubbering puddle – which took just about everything I had. It just choked me up big time. I once witnessed that exact scenario in an airport in person, and I was just as moved then too. Just as I am sometimes choked up when I hear the Star Spangled Banner at a ballgame.
Call me a patriotic softy.
There's something extra special about the concept of the volunteer armed forces in this country. Every year around Memorial Day I think of the Bible verse where Jesus says that there is no greater love than for someone to lay down his life for his friends. Of course at the time Jesus said that, He was specifically referring to Himself, but the essence of what He was saying is an axiomatic truth that applies across the board. I always think of our troops when I hear that verse and then I always fall in love with them all over again.
So that commercial was just something that struck a chord in me and I wanted to share why. If you are serving or ever have served in our armed forces, I just want to second the words of that commercial I saw today and say thank you.
Now I'm going to go watch Saving Private Ryan as I do every Memorial Day and really become a blubbering puddle.
Bush vs. Kerry... ahhhhhh, simpler times.
Category: News and Politics
I once lived in Chicago. With much of my family on my Mom's side living in Ohio, that meant I often drove six hours to spend holidays with them. After doing this over and over I came to think of the state of Indiana as having one use and one use only. The only way the state of Indiana was of any value was for driving across. It was only good to get you from Illinois to Ohio.
The reason I bring this up, for those of you who aren't from Indiana and are still with me, is that's kind of the same way I've been viewing this Presidential election for quite some time. This election's pool of candidates really didn't have anyone I felt I could back wholeheartedly, and therefore this election was and is only good for the sake of getting us to 2012. 2008 is going to be the State of Indiana of Presidential Elections.
Don't get me wrong. I'm ready for someone new. Although I voted for Bush twice, I'm extremely happy to see him leave the White House soon. If the Bush Presidency were a Kentucky Derby race horse it would have broken its two front ankles sometime in the middle of 2005 and thus would have needed to be put down. Man, did that train fall off the tracks! But I digress.
That brings me back to the upcoming election. Although I'm ready for someone new, I have no clue who to vote for. Like I said before, nobody really inspires me. I think much of America agrees because neither party really could come up with a viable nominee until well into the March caucuses. Of course as we all know, the Democrats still can't figure out who to go with. This wasn't the case in 2004. Remember Howard Dean was the clear favorite going into the first caucus in Iowa? And remember Howard Dean won that caucus quite handily? And remember Howard acted like a lunatic that night? And remember Howard quickly disappeared after that? Thus it was clearly a Bush/Kerry race from February all the way up to the November election. Here we are in May of 2008 and we still don't know what's going on with the Presidential race. Ahhhh 2004! Simpler times.
And that brings me to the real reason for my getting all uncharacteristically lofty and political on you. When I was making that video for my Mom for Mother's Day, I was going through the JibJab archives and came across the very first JibJab video I ever saw. I still think it's by far the best. Give it a spin for huge laughs. Whether you're a liberal wiener or a right-wing nutjob, you're sure to find this quite hysterical if you have never seen it before. Unlike Fox News, this video truly is fair and balanced.
Catch me on the cover of a New York Times Bestseller
Category: Writing and Poetry
As if my geekery hadn't already paved the way to enough odd and cool feathers in my cap, now I get to be the cover model of a New York Times Bestseller. Some of you already knew that I play the hero on the covers of a series of books by my good friend Thomas Greanias. There have been two so far, and a third will be coming next year. The second one, The Atlantis Prophecy, released this month, and it just debuted at 15 on the New York Times Bestseller list! How about that?
Thomas Greanias is right here on MySpace so be sure to add him if you haven't already. He'd love to hear from you. If you're curious about picking up the book and reading it, Thomas has been called the modern day Clive Cussler, and his books have a definite DaVinci Code/National Treasure flavor to them. Here's his myspace url:
Indiana Jones! A new documentary and getting in FRONT of the camera for a change.
Category: Movies, TV, Celebrities
I guess at this point it might be easy for a lot of you to just automatically assume that Jaws is my favorite movie. Guess again. Despite growing up being a huge movie lover and Steven Spielberg fan, I never even saw Jaws in its entirety until I was in my teens since I was only three when it came out. It still seems amazing to me that I made it that long, but dems da facts.
But when I was nine years old, I walked out of a movie theater forever changed. I was not only throttled by how amazing Raiders of the Lost Ark was when I first saw it, but that was the moment when I first started to understand exactly what a movie was. Since Indiana Jones was the same guy as Han Solo, I started to comprehend the fact that a movie was the result of a cast and a crew all showing up in one place with a camera and making these things. Thus my passion for the process of filmmaking that still lives on today was born.
Raiders of the Lost Ark is still my very favorite movie.
Well, after all the visibility we’ve been getting from The Shark is Still Working, I guess it was just a matter of time until I’d find myself in front of a camera being interviewed - rather than being beside the camera conducting interviews.
The project I ended up doing this for couldn’t be more appropriate. It’s one of TSISW’s sister projects called Indyfans: The Quest for Fortune and Glory. It’s a documentary on all things Indiana Jones. Since we at TSISW had become such good friends with Indyfans director, Brandon Kleyla, he asked us if we’d throw our fedoras into the ring. I felt like a pretentious doofus, but I ended up doing it and it was a lot of fun.
Be sure to stop by the Indyfans MySpace page for an add so you can stay up to date with Brandon’s progress with development. And check the latest press coverage Brandon has gotten. Brandon’s documentary just today got some awesome real estate in USA Today!
MySpace is so bogus! Apparantly they don’t like us doing the hyperlink trick in blogs anymore. That’s why they all link to the generic MySpace home page. Blah. Stupid. Here’s the url to the Indyfans page. And once you’re there, you can read the USA Today article:
This is totally random and stupid, but what the heck, I'm in a stupid mood. Chances are at some point later on today I will deem this blog too stupid to exist and then delete it. But like I said, what the heck. Then again, maybe my page could definitely stand to have a stupid romp of a blog after that awful downer I posted a couple of days ago.
We're getting into that time of year where one single item of food can take us back to our childhood more than any other I can think of – the marshmallow peep! Hot diggity! I am definitely an alleged marshmallow peep abuser. At least I was until a couple of years ago.
Two years ago on Easter Sunday I was in Atlanta at a Cubs/Braves baseball game. For those of you who don't frequent baseball games, most ballparks that aren't really cool and classic and old school like Wrigley and Fenway have various mindless things that they do to fill in down time between innings. These things usually involve the Jumbotron.
There's the Kiss Cam, the Shell Game, the Noise-ometer, and various contests that random people in the stands will be chosen to humiliate themselves by participating in. All for a $25.00 gift card to Applebee's or a free oil change! These contests can be anything. But on Easter Sunday two years ago in Atlanta three lucky adults who probably vote competed in front of 45,000 people to see who could eat the most Cheese Whiz Marshmallow Peep Dogs in three minutes.
Cheese Whiz Marshmallow Peep Dogs!!
In case the name of this culinary delight isn't self-explanatory enough for you, I shall break it down. You take a marshmallow peep, cut a slit into the peep the long way a la a hot dog bun. You insert a frankfurter into said slit, and add cheese whiz. Enjoy.
I wonder how many of those things Kobayashi could handle. The guy who won the contest that day polished off eight of them if I recall correctly.
Bleecchh!
Anyway, just felt like sharing. Hope I didn't ruin you off of peeps this year.
Youtube rules!! (Unless you’re the one throwing the puppy.)
Current mood: angry
Category: News and Politics
Sometimes I’m on the fence about whether or not to like the fact that we now live in the Youtube generation.
There’s the pure entertainment aspect of Youtube which I love. I can’t tell you how many times in the past weeks I’ve watched the five different videos revolving around the ongoing prank between Jimmy Kimmel and Matt Damon.
Then there are the videos submitted that only can result in the true humiliation of someone who doesn’t deserve it. Just ask the Star Wars Kid if you can catch him between any of his five therapy sessions a week. Or the poor girl who was singing the National Anthem at a hockey game and forgot the words. She walked off the ice utterly embarrassed then seconds later when she returned to the ice to try again she slipped and fell. She once again left the ice in tears completely devastated.
It’s bad enough that she has to know that 17,000 people saw that in person, and anyone within that hockey game’s local broadcast area saw her go through it on that day. But thanks to Youtube, all of America can now do a search and see this humiliating moment and point and laugh at her forever. I’m not too crazy about the fact that Youtube makes that possible.
But on days like today, I’m thanking God that we live in the Youtube generation! Youtube holds people accountable. Just ask Alec Baldwin or Michael Richards. Especially in a time when pocket sized video cameras are everywhere.
If you haven’t yet heard about the Marine who heartlessly hurled a puppy over a cliff in Iraq, I’m sure starting today, you’ll be hearing about nothing else for at least a week. And it’s all because that moment in time was captured on tape and uploaded on Youtube.
Now it’s just a matter of the proper actions being taken against this "Marine." Some the stuff mentioned by his superior when he was interviewed was talk of reduction in pay and reduction in rank and possibly even a court martial for the puppy-throwing corporal. He said the deplorable act falls way short of the honorable way Marines are supposed to carry themselves. Keep an eye on Fox and CNN. I’m sure in the upcoming days when the corporal is quaking in his BDU’s and hoping to do the very best job at damage control and image management that he can, he’ll be interviewed by one of the news channels live via satellite. He’ll look into the camera and give his best spineless Justin Timberlake "non-apology". "I’m sorryif I offended anyone", he’ll say. "I’m not a cruel person." "I’m active in my church back home." "Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah." Then live via satellite his aunt will probably join in to vouch for his character - believing we all just fell off the turnip truck this morning.
I’m just incensed by this! Whether you support the war in Iraq or not, this is not good and your blood should be boiling. Not because you’re a bleeding heart over the death of a cute puppy, but because one of the boys who are over there representing us could be that evil and that stupid. It doesn’t matter if you believe the war is about greed and oil. The United States is telling the world that we’re there because of compassion, to preserve peace, and to spread democracy. Well so much for peace and compassion thanks to Corporal Knucklehead.
If you’re trying to watch the video, Youtube has quickly pulled it citing it being a "violation of their terms of use" probably on the basis of it just being too offensive. That’s fine. I guess they are to be congratulated for not wanting to carry such a video. Just do a google search for "marine throws puppy" and I’m sure you’ll find it somewhere. Be warned though. If you’re an animal lover and/or a patriot at all, it might be one of the most horrible things you ever watch.
Regardless of Youtube’s effort to contain the video, they will now fall victim to the very monster they’ve created. There’s no stopping this video now. It’s out there, and it will most certainly reappear on Youtube over and over and over and will be like a virus that is beyond their own control no matter how hard they try to keep pulling it.
I said it once and I’ll say it again, today I’m glad we live in the Youtube generation.
Ugh! I can't even know where to begin. It goes without saying that I'm incredibly sad right now. My feelings are so far beyond that though. First it was Percy Rodrigues last September, now it's Roy Scheider who has left us. And still The Shark is Still Working sits on a shelf! How many times do we have to go through this?? How may times does one of the people whose work we've spent three years honoring have to leave us before TSISW has a real chance to do what it was designed to do?
Please forgive me. I'm just a little rattled right now and I don't mean to come off like I'm making this more about me than the fact that a Hollywood legend has passed away. It would just make the loss a little more digestible if I could at least know that TSISW reminded him of how special he was to so many.
I wish I could elaborate on our time with Roy. I just don't think I have it in me right now. It goes without saying that Roy's participation in TSISW was extremely significant. I loved being around him and working with him. I'm so thankful for the ways that he added to the project. So for now, I'll just say "farewell and adieu", Roy. You'll be greatly missed.
Here are a couple of my Roy Scheider blogs from the past if you want to get a little bit more of a glimpse into what he meant to me and TSISW.
I vividly remember walking into Barnes and Noble in Evanston, IL in the summer of 1997 when the cover of a new book on display up front caught my eye. It was simple, it had great use of color, and its title was a three-letter word occupying almost the entire frame of the cover vertically.Everything about it refused to let me just walk on by. I still consider it to be one of the finest book covers ever (although the book's author now hates it.)
The book was called Meg and it was by an authorI had never heard of before. I picked the book up and read the jacket. It said "Meg" was short for Carcharodon Megalodon which was the sixty foot ancestor of the great white shark. The catch phrase on the back read, "Jurassic Shark!" That was enough to get me to buy it and read it.
To impulsively buy a novel from an unknown author was very unusual for me because although I love to read, I rarely do well with fiction. I normally read non-fiction to be educated or inspired rather than read fiction to be entertained. When it comes to reading fiction, I just normally have the attention span of a lemur on Red Bull.
I got Meg home and started reading right away. The first four pages of Meg took place 70 million years ago to set the stage of how mighty Megadolodons were by having one devour a Tyrannosaurus Rex. I'll never forget the line, "for the first and last time in its existence, the T Rex felt the icy grip of fear."
Wow!
I finished the book that night, and it has been one of my five favorite books ever since.
So just imagine my giddiness when years later through a series of unrelated events I would have the opportunity to have a connection with Meg's author. My business partner, Erik began designing covers for him, and since he was largely inspired as a writer by Peter Benchley's Jaws, we were able to get him to appear in The Shark is Still Working.
Out of all that came a completely fun feather in my cap that I don't think I've ever talked about here. In the second follow-up novel to that book that I loved so much, I actually got written into it as a character. In Alten's third Meg novel, Primal Waters, Erik and I appear as ourselves… except we're more corrupt and smarmy than we are in real life. (At least I hope Steve was making that part up.) We appear as ourselves in the sense that we're partners in production. Steve does a pretty nice job of keeping things pretty true to life right down to my overly gelled hair. What fun.
Anyway, the ultimate point of blogging all of this now is just to tell you about Steve and his brand new novel. He's got a new one coming out that is by far his loftiest book yet called The Shell Game. In a unique attempt to drum up excitement, a "theatrical trailer" has been produced. Check it out here.
In 1973, two little words inaugurated what would become the phenomenon that was (and still is) "Jaws"…
"For Wendy."
This simple affectionate dedication was printed on the opening page of Peter Benchley's novel and has appeared there throughout countless re-printings ever since.In a sense, Jaws, is hers – a gift from a devoted husband and partner in ocean life preservation.In this sense, there could be no greater honor than to receive this following sentiment - - - From Wendy.
"The Shark is Still Working is as fascinating as it is thorough; a true love letter to a cultural phenomenon that has special significance to our family. Peter's legacy as a writer and an ocean conservationist is honored in this amazing documentary, as well as the many talented artists who brought Jaws to life on the silver screen. The passion and insight expressed throughout this work is evident from the very beginning. Engrossing and fun, TSISW proves its thesis with amazing zeal."
On that note I'm moved to think of the exact moment in time when I found out Mr. Benchley had passed.
One word that would most aptly describe the post-production process for The Shark is Still Working would be "routine." Six nights a week from 5:00 until midnight (sometimes later), Erik and I would meet in a room above a garage to work on how to cut hundreds of hours of material together. This went on for well over a year. At all times off in the background, we'd keep one of the 24 hour news channels on the television with the volume turned down.
On February 6, 2006 we were in the middle of our usual time editing when we saw Peter Benchley's picture on the screen. I dashed across the room to turn the volume up and it was being reported that Mr. Benchley had passed away.
What a moment. A moment that completely turned my feeling about this entire documentary upside down.
In one second our documentary went from celebrating the writing of a man who was with us, to celebrating the writing of a man who was gone. I immediately turned to Erik and said, "Well, I guess we know who we're dedicating this documentary to now."
Eight months before that, we had already decided that we wanted to call attention to Benchley's work as an ambassador for sharks and the oceans. It was something that Peter and his wife Wendy were both very passionate about, and it was very worthy of being considered part of "The Legacy of Jaws."
Some people debate the effect of Jaws on the status of the shark. Some believe that sharks became more endangered because of Jaws. Others believe the shark is more cared for because of Jaws. Yes, a lot of bloodlust shark hunting went on right after Jaws was released. However, many of today's foremost shark experts and conservationists fell in love with sharks after they saw Jaws as kids. Their initial fascination with sharks, (sparked by Jaws) is now employed in their professional capacities to preserve sharks and their habitat.
So which of those two realities outweighs the other? That's debatable.
What isn't debatable is that Peter Benchley loved sharks and the ocean before, during, and after Jaws all the way until his passing. He had wisely decided to use the credibility he earned from writing Jaws to get people to listen to what he had to say about shark and ocean preservation. This led to a life of devout environmental activism and more volumes on the plight of endangered marine animals. He and Wendy traveled the world helping to raise conservation awareness on behalf of numerous organizations, like Environmental Defense and The New England Aquarium. They also spent a lot of time diving with sharks and marine life over the years, getting to know first-hand about the subject of their passion.
When we were going to tackle this subject matter in the documentary, we knew we had to do so carefully. It was so important to us that TSISW said something about the state of the shark that Peter would agree with and be proud of. Since Peter never had the chance to see TSISW, there was no praise we desired more than that of Wendy Benchley. There would be no better indicator that we had honored Peter's legacy than if we were to receive her blessing.
We'd like to say a very sincere thank you to Wendy not only for her kind words, but for her wonderful generosity and assistance to us the past couple of years. Her support truly helped make TSISW much more special than it otherwise would have been.
angry
sad
