I'm so sick of the pain. Going on 6 years dealing with my A.S. (AnkylosingSpondylitis) After so man years in pain. You just get used to it. But.. There are so many times you just want to not deal with it. If I could just feel like a normal 25 year old. I don't know what it's like to feel no pain... To be normal, and healthy. Everyone has their problems. My A.S. is nothing compared to other peoples problems. Yet... It feels like knifes in my spine and hips. I just want those knifes to come out... I can't work at hoag anymore untill I get this under control. They gave me a packet today for medical leave, and benifits. I just want to work. I have so many bills to pay. I don't wanna go on disibility. I can remember back to my youth.. I played baseball, and soccer.. and was a healthy little kid... I just want to go back to being that healthy kid. Wish wish wish.. .. My only hope is Prayer. Will you pray for me?
Pretty is ugly I say. California is full of beautiful people. Most of which are stuck up, non forgiving. think they are cooler than they are people. Me.. Bitter? No.... that is what I see here. Expecially in the OC You run into more mean people than nice people here. Why is that?? Az is nothing like CA. Before I moved here. People from Az always told me CA people are so chill, down to earth easy going. Man.. That is not true at all. Certain parts of CA have some chill, cool people. But.. I have yet to feel like I'm home. Girls here are so Hot, you would think they were all models. But.. Like I have always been.. Beautiful is Ugly. A girl can be pretty than pretty, yet treat someone like crap. That is ugly. You can be The hottest girl in the world, and Act like your better.. That is ugly... How much money you have? what kinda car you drive? where you live? Questions you hear alot here by those pretty ugly people. lol... I'm not bitter. Friends I have are good hearted, easy going, fun, loving, carring, forgiving, great people. I really don't need pretty people, with money.. and cars.. and houses, and .... whatever else to make myself feel better. I'm finding who I am each and everyday. Are you?
I would like to do a study on people and relationship. I find this topic more and more interesting as I get older. Seeing people together makes me wonder how they met. I see all kinda of different people together. Short with tall, Fat with skinny, Ugly with "hot", or just to joinings of the same look. I'm a guy that understands that not everyone likes what TV, and magizines portre'. Not every guy likes the skinny model girl, and not every girl likes the hot bod GQs. People like what they like.
I would like my study to include how couples meet, where they met, how they felt about eachother, and what they think about their relationship now. Plus some other things. (Fact) Most people that end up Together are Intoduced by someone. Either it be a friend, a family member,a business partner, or just some random person off the street. People just feel more comfortable with introduction. Which is understandable. (Fact) People also get along faster and better if put in situations where they are forced to get to know Eachother. Such as: new Hire Oriantation, and or being locked in a broken elivator together. Otherwize, people are just not going to take an anitiative to meet others while out and about. Unless there is some kind of drug involved. LOL... So..... My study will include these questions and hopefully get some answers.
Tylar
PS. (Fact) everyone is their own worse critic, (Fact) people are just straight up scared of everyone these days.
Psst. (Fact) Most girls today "know" if a guy make an anitiative to talk with them....It's cuzz the guy is trying to get them in bed.
Psssst..LOL.. (Fact) Most guys think if a girl even talks with them.. "They are In"
well.. I made it to Newport Beach cali.. But.. I sure had a hell hole 2 days.. On the the.. (The first time) My U-Haul Truck engine burst into flames.. That was not cool.. Sooo.. I had to wait out in the middle of no where for a Tow Truck to Come get me. That took... Oo.. 6 HOURS!! Ya.... I know.. holy shit.. that sucks.. They get there and tell me.. Not only are they taking me back to Phoenix, But I have to wait till the next day to get a truck.. So.. Next day. I started getting ready to go at 7 am. It took till 2 pm To get my Truck and head out to California again. Man.. all that sucks.. But.. I kept telling myself.. Good Comes from bad.. and it did.. I'm getting my money back.. woohooo..
Saying good bye is hard to do. Expecially when it's hard for them to say good bye. I never really realized how many people cared for me.. A going away party, never to be forgotten. My friends like to call it, " A see ya later party".... I'll call it that 2. 40+ people showed up for my See ya later party.... Doesn't sound like much.. But when you see them all together, having fun, and there in celibration of you.. It seems like a million friends that love you. A million friends you have shared alot of time with.
They made me a quilt, with pictures of friends, and people from work Sewn into sqaures that were made from a pare of my Scrub pants. I was wondering where those went. lol.... I will take a picture of it.. and put on mypace for everyone to see. It's now time to meet good people again. And create Friendships.. It's a hard road to make friends in a new place.. But.. Keep on Truckin. haha..
accomplished
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