I dont know what a Hokie is...

"I dont know what a Hokie is, but God is one." 

That was on a t-shirt that an ESPN analyst was wearing as the Virginia Tech Hokies kicked off the college football season today. 

For those of you who dont remember, a psychopath shot up the Va. Tech campus and killed dozens of people back in April.  Today, before the kickoff there were memorials and tributes, and it was good to see the two teams enter the field together as their respective bands played together.

There is obviously more to life than sports, but sports can give us a sense of community, of common purpose, and for a while maybe sports can take our minds off just how crappy the world can be sometimes.

God Bless Virginia Tech.  Go Hokies.

9:34 AM - 1 Comments - 2 Kudos - Add Comment

Waaaah! He took my parking!

Last week, a lot of extra handicapped spaces appeared in the parking lots adjacent to my office.  I thought I had surely died and gone to heaven, or I was dreaming.  There were 28 spaces!!!  Handicapped spaces as far as the eye could see!!!

Immediately, the other "normal" people in the office started to complain because regular spots were taken.  They practically assaulted me--like I snuck thru the lot in the middle of the night with my blue paint and handicapped guy (there is an official name, but I forget) template.

A quick look at the Kentucky Building Code indicated that only 8 spaces were required for our lot.  Today the crews started repainting the lot, and handicapped spaces magically disappeared, gone as quickly as they had appeared.

I still have my own personal space for all intents and purposes, but this just another case of the government trying to put the handicapped man down.  By the way, this is tongue-in-cheek. 

5:58 PM - 0 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

McDonald’s and fuzzy math

If you really want to confuse someone, go to McDonald's or any fast food place.  If you get about $3.78 worth of food, you probably do what I do.  I would give the cashier $4.03.  That way, you get back a quarter (1 coin) instead of 22 cents (most likely 4 coins).

Now the part that bothers me is that the cashier will look at you like you just asked them to work a calculus problem.  It bothers me for 2 reasons--1)  The cashier obviously cant figure out that you should get back a quarter (the extra 3 cents drives them nuts); and 2)  The cashier still gives you the deer in the headlights look even though the cash register figures out this new math for them.

Now, I was not great at math (see the English and law degrees), but this is about as simple as it's going to get.  That aside--THERE IS A MAGIC BOX THAT DOES THE WORK FOR THEM.

P.S.--Why is there a sign in the drive-thru that says Braille menus are available?

2:33 PM - 0 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

Handicapped parking and motorcycles

So, today I went to Waffle House for lunch.  Anyone who knows me or has read my profile knows that I have cerebral palsy, and I have had the handy-dandy parking sticker since I started driving.  Anyway, at Waffle House there is a motorcycle parked in the handicapped spot.  Sure enough, they have the "handicapped" license plate.  Seriously, if you can ride a motorcycle, then you arent too handicapped.  Not only do I have to compete with every senior citizen in the free world for those coveted spots (enduring their icy glares as they secretly think, "He's too young to be handicapped--why's he in my spot?"), now I have to compete with motocyclists as well.

Walking funny barely seems worth it.

3:06 PM - 2 Comments - 2 Kudos - Add Comment

I Love My Son
Current mood: apathetic

So, my oldest goes to the Indy car race last night with his uncle.  He got a few souvenirs, and when he got home, he decided to give me the Andretti-Green Racing poster.  This poster features Danica Patrick.  God, I love my son.

8:07 PM - 2 Comments - 2 Kudos - Add Comment