Love that Painful Feeling
Current mood: sick

"I love you, baby!
And if it's quite alright,
I need you, baby,
To warm a lonely night.
I love you, baby;
Trust in me when I say.
Oh, pretty baby,
Don't bring me down, I pray.
Oh, pretty baby,
Now that I found you, stay.
And let me love you, baby,
Let me love you...."

The frills and thrills of my life have come and faded quickly. I'm a girl of simple interests that take quite awhile to wear thin... a little blue jello even orange with mandarin orange slices in it at the very least. some kool aid. gummy things every so often... give me some spicy lays any day and I'll be overjoyed. I love grapes. Play videos games with me! Keep a conversation going...keep it interesting. Feeling as I am... its nice to have some company...

and if I trust you I'll sing to you.

come get caught up in my web of intangible decisions and then you may understand what I mean.

9:19 PM - 1 Comments - 2 Kudos - Add Comment

Grounded
Current mood: restless

Last day of being STUCK in the house!
I realize that being stuck in the house so long kinda changed the way I talk. and I really want to talk. Maybe a moment of isolation was what I needed to make me want to talk to people again... although I still dont feel just quite normalized yet. Man I sound like a little kid or something. I keep repeating everything in the next sentence... and I am so restless! I've never been so restless. I sleep forever, or so I wish... and when I wake up I start wandering around the house, going through old papers, folding stuff... I miss being outside. I miss my friends. It feels like I havent seen any of them in forever... since sunday or monday... damn and its only wednesday. What am I gonna do when college interferes?
Oh well... let the music carry my ill thoughts away. Always gonna have music when I have to be home. I dont want to watch tv unless its something I REALLY wanna watch. Otherwise I really dont like the hum of the electricity.
I painted my toes! I wish I had black nail polish though. Black. Red. White. Now theres a combination. I should go buy some.
and a swim suit. mucho needed.

"Oh melancholy day, please dont let the rain wash away my last ray of sunshine."

Capitivity today, FREEDOM tomorrow! but for now my blue jello will do.

5:43 PM - 1 Comments - 2 Kudos - Add Comment

tsumaranai yo
Current mood: crappy

It's hard to push forward in my artistic pursuits... I'm getting bored. Where's the inspiration? Sometimes I try and think of everything like a Japanese drama, where people are always saying something inspirational and that same kind of music starts to play, and then everybody's pumped up to do something. That should so be me.

...but it could just be the stress. My government class project is going to be a pain to complete... and I have a million deadlines to meet. My art class painting is due within the next week, I want to finish writing the letters I started, I have my own drawings I want to do (though I'm not sure what they are yet)... and I totally messed up my essay for english class! ...but it'll get better. It always does. it has to get better, right?

Things just arent the way they used to be. I mean, I know change is inevitable... but everytime I think about the way I am now, I start getting mixed feelings. I dont really like the way I am now. I care too much about the things people are saying to me. Where's the old me who didn't get hurt by all the people making fun of me, or their stupid side comments..?
I'm kinda depressed right now I guess.

Ganbate! Kyootsukete ne...
even my nihongo is getting worse.
nande!?

Maybe I'll go out with Kenney san and Akane... hopefully. Maybe even today, because I wouldnt want to waste such a nice day!

Its always prettier outside after it rains.

3:27 PM - 0 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

Need for...nani?
Current mood: sleepy

You poor lonely fool
Damned to be alone the rest of your miserable days
Whoever said misery loves company was surely correct.
Right now I would LOVE some company.

Just let the words flow from your mind
Spilling out like a wave of blood…
Youre looking a little pale there my dearest…
Oh, my mistake. Tis your natural skin color.

I really do need some new clothes... but I hardly have the cash to fill my needs. Who knew a t-shirt could cost so much. and pants. those are really expensive. sure they say a good pair of pants are a sure investment...but honestly... it makes me sad to be spending so much money.
Clearance section from here on out. Forever and ever...

nice things are not a necessity... theyre just nice to have.
oh the spoils of being rich...how I wish I could have a little of such glory.

5:58 PM - 1 Comments - 2 Kudos - Add Comment

Whoo Hoo?
Current mood: contemplative

I deleted my blogglings after realizing they were all from last year...
and seeing them just sitting there all the time was making me kind of sad. and nostalgic.
or maybe thats from watching Futurama. its so sweet. but so sad. *smiles* I love it.

I do believe
Lifes pretty good

Deep sleep has done me wonders.
The only thing that never ceases to bother me is my dreams.
they bring out such strong feelings from my heart...
man...too much for me to feel after I wake up

*sigh*

I miss everybody.

11:34 PM - 1 Comments - 2 Kudos - Add Comment