Zero is assaulted online by a christian named Dick!
Current mood: argumentative
Category: Religion and Philosophy

So it all started today when I noticed Britney Spears is a featured Myspace artist.  
Appalled, I clicked the link and read an avalanche of posts from fans who love her.  Somehow they don't see the spoiled, talentless, bad-mother cokewhore celebritard that I see.  
I then humbly offered my own opinion of Britney and her fans:

Christ, I'd hate to be trapped in a room with you idiots and your shitty music collections.
She's a talentless cootch! You do realize that every time she performs, she's lip-syncing right? You're paying big bucks for tickets so you can watch her mouth the words on Jumbotron. Fools.

Imagine my shock when a stranger named Richard launched an attack of a decidedly personal nature upon Yours Truly:

Hey Zero, you fit your name to a T!!! With your pentagram and cross bones. You don't even know what good music is. Now I'm not a pop music fan at heart, but Britney Spears has to be one of the greatest artist of this generation . Sure she has had some bad luck, but HEY, who hasn't ? The only difference is that she had the unlucky priviledge of it happening in the public eye. So take your opinions and your own santanic ways, and keep them to yourself!! !!!

Ouch!  Holy Mackerel, where did that come from?  Intrigued by Richard's awesome profile photo (pleated khaki pants) I simply had to learn more about this stranger with his razor-sharp wit and penetrating insights.  I mean, this guy thinks Britney Spears is one of the greatest artists of this generation!
From his profile page with a background swimming with large crosses I determined Richard to be either (a) Hardcore Christian or (b) a huge Black Sabbath fan.  Utilizing my sharp detective skills I determined him to be most likely Christian.  He did after all, call me a satanist and get pissy about the pentagram which today is only associated with satanism because of centuries of christian meddling.
I've met satanists that were fantastic people and I've met christians who were absolute assholes and vice versa.  Regardless of religious persuasion the folks who I dislike the most are the ones who feel the need to beat me over the head with their beliefs when I clearly don't give a fuck.
This smug butthole caught me on the wrong day.  Everyone has an opinion but if anyone should keep their opinion to himself it's a 39 year-old christian myspace prowler who thinks Britney Spears is the greatest artist of this generation!
....and so I sent Richard the following e-mail:

Brother, you sure are free with your opinions as you order me to stifle mine.  That's called hypocrisy, old bean.
Wow, you sure are judgemental for a christian.  Do I just fill you with righteous anger and indignation?   
I'll have you know that I'm not a satanist but thanks for condemning me based on my cartoon avatar.  I think God's going to have a bone to pick with you.
We both have a right to our opinions and mine happens to be that Ms. Spears is definitely NOT the greatest artist of this generation.  She doesn't write music, she purchases music written by others.  There is so much studio magic shoveled onto her vocal recordings that it's anybody's guess what her singing voice actually sounds like.  She lip-syncs at her "live" performances.  She IS a talented dancer though when she's practiced, in shape and off the cocaine.
By the way, I do know what good music sounds like.  I'll have you know that I enjoy a vast variety of music from a multitude of genres.  Do you also believe that since I enjoy the Beatles they must suck because I don't appreciate Britney and don't know what good music is?
It's not Britney's bad luck that caused her problems to take place in the public eye, her problems were public because she constantly sought out the cameras throughout her meltdown.
Ah Richard, you clever fellow with your jab about how I fit my name to a T.  You fit your own name to a T as well my friend.  I'm sure most of the folks who know you call you Dick.
Judge not, lest ye be judged.  
Love thy neighbor.  
I think it was God who said these things wasn't it?  Dick, I suggest you take his advice.

                     Toodles,
                            Zero Delorean

Nothing pleases me more than quoting someone's own religion to point out that their own God would be unhappy with their behavior.  To folks like Richard I say:  You don't need to speak for God, let God speak for himself if He's displeased with me.  For the record, I don't believe at all in the biblical, vengeful, christian God.
So, that's my story and I hope you find it as entertaining as I do.  
If you'd like to tell Richard (Dick to his friends) what you think, I am thoughtfully providing a link to his profile page:

Call Me Dick  

Be sure to tell him Zero sent you!

Currently listening : Depths of Death By Sentinel Beast

2:56 AM - 1 Comments - 2 Kudos - Add Comment

What time is it? It’s the Zero Hour! (Episode Two up now!!)

It's here! Episode Two of my podcast, featuring music personally handpicked from my personal stash.  Hear music from these Zero-Tested, Zero-Approved masters of horror, macabre and the just plain weird:

American Werewolves------------Balzac
Beatallica--------------------------Blitzkid
Crimson Ghosts-------------------Dennis Leary
Diemonsterdie---------------------Gene Simmons
GWAR-------------------------------Hedwig & The Angry Inch
Metallica----------------------------Michale Graves
Misfits-------------------------------Mister Monster
Plasmatics--------------------------Reverend Hellbastard
Rosedales---------------------------Spectremen
The Spookshow---------------------The Other
Warren Zevon-----------------------William Shatner
Wind Wraith

Click the link below to give it a listen, feel free to tell me what you think.
 
The Zero Hour Podcast Episode Two

If you missed it, give Episode One a listen:

The Zero Hour Podcast Episode One

If you hear something you like, look 'em up and buy something.  Hungry bands eat that kinda shit up!:

                                                          -Z-

4:24 AM - 89 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

The Zero Hour Podcast
Current mood: lazy

The Zero Hour! My new podcast...
I've recently delved into the world of podcasting and I'm inviting you to check it out! 

It's a radio-style podcast full of music that I personally enjoy along with some news tidbits.  This is only episode one of what I intend to make an ongoing project.  Future podcasts will include music, interviews, requests, phone calls and whatever else I can come up with...

The Zero Hour Podcast: Episode One

Enjoy!!

Currently listening : Along Came A Spider By Alice Cooper Release date: 2008-07-29

4:46 PM - 89 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

1 step closer.....

I went to see Mercury Rising's band Anything That Moves tonight and I feel safe saying that the hatchet is buried.  Mercury will always be my brother and tonight we put a lot of hard feelings behind us.  Mercury's band Anything That Moves were outstanding as usual and I'm proud to call these gentlemen friends.  Remember that the only things carved in stone are the things actually carved into stone.  There's always room for forgiveness between friends and I will stand by Mercury until the bitter end no matter what's taken place in the past.  Ideally we'd be able to work together as  the most awesome band the world has ever seen.  Our new-found ability to speak to one another runs a close second.  This is a family-oriented genre of music so naturally we fight like family but we also forgive like family.  Who can say what the future holds?

Expect the Unexpected in 2008 from Diemonsterdie.

Mercury, I mean every word.  Our current situation was never my first choice.  Here's to better times from here on out....

_Z_

1:12 AM - 89 Comments - 3 Kudos - Add Comment

Diemonsterdie 2008
Current mood: Fucking Stoked!

We are emerging from our annual period of hibernation to bring you more Diemonsterdie than the average mortal is capable of handling!  April 18th will be Diemonsterdie's first show for 2008 and we'll bring the graveyard shock n' roll with a vengeance for Doctor Cyclops Records annual birthday bash at Bar Deluxe in Salt Lake City! 

You don't want to miss this one!  Everything you love about Diemonsterdie is now bigger and better and what better way to show your love than to show up early and enjoy our open bar?!

That's right, have a drink on us on April 18th while supplies last!  Once you've achieved the perfect buzz prepare for horrific entertainment all night long with tons of thrills chills and surprises!

Could the rumors be true?  Has LaVerne LaVey returned from the dead?  Anything is possible so clear your calendar and see for yourself!

Currently listening : The Slider By T. Rex Release date: 08 November, 2005

12:40 AM - 89 Comments - 2 Kudos - Add Comment

A Great And Terrible Loss...
Current mood: determined

...is the title of Diemonsterdie's latest album!  Long-delayed, I know.  Getting this thing finished was a huge hurdle.  Meatwhistle and I were hoping for the  input and assistance of our bandmates to no avail.  After months of them dodging the issue we took matters into our own hands, recruiting our ally Sinister along the way, and got everything finished so the album could be sent to press.  We just barely missed a New Year's Eve deadline due to the duplication company not living up to it's advertised turnaround time.  Rest assured we shall not be doing business with Discmakers in the future.
If you haven't yet purchased a copy of A Great And Terrible Loss, do so immediately!  It's a fantastic album and the limited 1st pressing is going fast so act now!  Only $10 and we pay for shipping, none of that usual internet crap where they charge you 8 dollars to stick your $15 album in the mail.
Diemonsterdie is refocusing in 2008.  We are rebuilding the monster so to speak.  Elimination of the naysayers and man-children is only step one.  Compelling soap opera drama is waiting in the wings so stay tuned.... 

Currently listening : Maggots: The Record By Wendy O. Williams Release date: 19 December, 2000

9:58 AM - 89 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

Finally! A new album update...
Category: Music

The day has arrived at last, Diemonsterdie's new album is out of the recording studio and into the finishing stages of artwork and sending it to press!  It's been a long haul but we are here at last.

The album sounds fucking GREAT if I may say so myself, admittedly I am of a very biased opinion but I'm confident that Diemonsterdie has outdone themselves with this one.

The core recordings were laid down at Boho Digitalia Studios then languished in limbo until we were able to place it into the very capable hands of  Dr. Cyclops Records very own Brian Grella, guitarist for Under Radar.  Brian took over and single-handedly performed all the mastering and mixing duties to bring this fucker in for a photo finish! 

16 Tracks in all and titled "A Great And Terrible Loss", allow me to provide the final track listing in no particular order:

01.  LIFELESS ARE THE EYES

02.  INVISIBLE HANDS

03.  STILL PINK INSIDE

04.  YOU CAN'T DECOMPOSE FOREVER

05.  RED WEDDING DRESS

06.  THE STRANGE MIND OF PHINEAS GAGE

07.  WITHIN THE SWAMP THERE DWELLS A DEAD THING

08.  HUMAN HEADS IN FUNERAL JARS

09.  49 MINUTES TO LIVE

10.  ANOTHER MILLION YEARS

11.  THE CREATURE FROM THE BLACK LAGOON IS DEAD

12.  LIFE IS A SERIES OF BITTER DISAPPOINTMENTS

13.  DOGS DIE ALL THE TIME

14.  ESCAPE FROM SKULL ISLAND

15.  THE DEAD ONES REMEMBER

16.  WHAT HAPPENED TO THE BABY ELIZABETH?

Watch for a 2007 release date, just one of several upcoming surprises from Dr. Cyclops Records!

9:16 PM - 89 Comments - 7 Kudos - Add Comment

Out of 9 lives, I've used at least 5....
Current mood: contemplative
Category: Life

Today I've been reflecting on the close calls and near-death experiences I've avoided over the years and it's getting to be quite the list.  Even when I disregard some horrible incidents of alcohol poisoning and a five-mile walk at night through a shitty part of town while drunk and dressed in drag, I've tangled with the Grim Reaper more than most.  The most recent event involved yours truly and a pair of 55-gallon drums of very flammable liquid.  I was 25 feet in the air attempting to repair a warehouse rack containing those drums when the rack collapsed and the drums plunged to the concrete floor.  My catlike reflexes kept me from being struck as I held on for dear life with my kung-fu grip and waited for the explosion.  By some miracle neither drum ruptured or sparked so I live to tell the story.  The sweet adrenaline rush was an added bonus.  Perhaps someday I'll attempt to list all my close calls for your reading enjoyment.

On an entirely different subject, what the fuck is the world coming to when Sammy Hagar and Michael Anthony are the only ones from Van Halen to show up at their indoctrination into the Rock N' Roll Hall O' Fame?  Eddie must be in some bad fucking shape if he couldn't leave rehab long enough to accept that tremendous honor.  Or maybe he couldn't face Michael Anthony after announcing his teenage son would be replacing Anthony on bass.  David Lee Roth was supposed to perform backed by Velvet Revolver, but passed after VR refused to play Roth's choice of song and further said they'd only do it if they got to choose.  Fucking egomaniacs!  It's not your party assholes, where is your goddamned respect?  This only confirms my suspicion that Velvet Revolver is a bunch of jerks.

Currently listening : Permission to Land By The Darkness Release date: 16 September, 2003

1:43 PM - 89 Comments - 8 Kudos - Add Comment

Racing Thoughts, Courtesy Of A.D.D.
Current mood: mellow

Hey hey!  It seems my hopelessly scattered brains have come together long enough to throw a blog together while remaining too unfocused to stick to a single topic.  Please pardon my attention span...

Recently I was watching the morning news on Fox and I swear to God the newscasters pulled out a fucking newspaper then spent five minutes reading from it while they were on the air.  Fox morning news already contained more fluff than any two networks combined so all that was missing from this idiotic display were the clown shoes and rubber noses.  I guess you can't expect very much from the station that gives us "The World In A Minute" and follows it with 10 minutes of coverage on easy summer hairstyles.

Mark St. John died recently, I think it was a stroke.  He was the poor asshole KISS chose to replace frog-faced Vinnie Vincent after Lick It Up.  Why he was picked is a mystery since he wasn't a fan and scorned their brand of music as beneath a genius virtuoso like himself.  Long story short, he recorded with KISS for the spectacularly bad Animalize album, then came down with some kind of arthritis that turned his hands purple so KISS gave him the boot.  I think he played live with them only one time so cherish that memory if you were there.  Frankly I'm amazed that he had enough celebrity left for the media to acknowledge his untimely demise.

Am I to understand that not wearing a seatbelt in cars is so unsafe that we must now suffer a law enforcement crackdown, yet somehow the motorcycle is okay? 

Currently listening : Bat out of Hell II: Back into Hell By Meat Loaf Release date: 14 September, 1993

10:38 PM - 89 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

My friend list has shrunk by 54
Category: MySpace

I was looking through my friend list the other day and noticed that there were a large number of deleted profiles, 54 in all. 

I salute you fallen warriors, hopefully you went out on your own terms and not as a result of a campaign of genocide by Myspace......

*sigh*

This is the most boring blog entry of all time.  Perhaps I should change the title...

Currently listening : Dominator By Wasp Release date: 03 May, 2007

4:41 PM - 89 Comments - 2 Kudos - Add Comment